IVF/ICSI/FET in September!!!

[Blue12]

LOL - I feel like I am just waiting for time to pass here too!

I am far from ov - but looking forward to it so that I can count down to my baseline scan. Dh and I have discussed trying naturally this month LMAO - chances are slim - but a bit of hope doesn't hurt right?

to everyone as we sit tight and wait!

 

[Leilani]

We've BD more in the past 5 nights than the past 5 weeks! There's no harm in trying to beat the odds - I did it with failed fertilisation and you did it with the OHSS!!

 

[MummyIwanabe]

def keep trying naturally. myself and DH do but I don't chart, i don't bother worrying about it I just know roughly when I ovulate and if we can BD every other day or every 2 days and hope for the best lol. To be honest it's nice not to dangle my legs in the air for ages (sorry tmi!) and take it too seriously! that bit I don't miss at all! lol

 

[Tory123]

Hi

Seems like we have been doing quite abit of BD the last few days lol. AF is over due now by a week and yes I have done about 20 test all BFN. She is just playing games as she knows soon as I have AF then can start the IVF for my FET. If I could just have one round in the ring with her and that's not like me I'm a none violent person lol. Apparently after hours of googling its quite common to have a normal period straight after IVF and the next period to be delayed.

Good luck xx

 

[mercyme]

Can I join you guys? I might be starting IVF in September, but . . .

I'm terrified. I don't know if I can emotionally handle a failed IVF -- it will cost us upwards of $12,000. We have enough savings to cover it, but if it didn't work... that's a BIG chunk of our savings just gone, with nothing to show for it. I get sick thinking about it. We've done 3 IUIs -- just about $300-400 each, which is pocket change compared to IVF. With DH's low sperm count & high FSH levels, I think we've run out of options. But the 2ww, getting BFNs -- that would be The End and, gosh, I'm getting teary just imagining that.

I know no one can make this decision for me, but it'd be nice to know that someone understands? (I'm fascinated by all the UK people who have national IVF coverage, and slightly jealous!)

 

[MummyIwanabe]

Hi Mercyme,

I totally understand as most ladies on here do the scariness of parting with all that money. Sadly it didn't work for us and we're about to try our second attempt. I too thought I couldn't possible handle it not working both emotionally and financially but its a leap of faith and when it doesn't work its bloody awful but you get back on the road and live to fight another day. All I can say is that was my greatest fear of coming away with nothing but it happened and I griefed then life moved on. I felt sick and still feel sick sometimes when I think wow we really need some new furniture (I could have had that and had something to show for it at least) but try and think of it as if it takes 2/3 goes (hopefully not!) then that's a small price to pay for having your own child. looking at him/her everyday would be worth every penny and our FS told us be prepared to try 3 times financially if you can otherwise you could give up before it's had chance to work.

We're self funded and the thought of 3 goes makes me but you just gota hope it won't come to that and if it does that if you can afford it, it'll be worth it! Hard pill to swollow when some have them like sweets and we can't but hey ho, life isn't fair in many many ways!

Good luck mercyme, once you settle into the idea I think the lure of wanting a child will overrule anything else xx

 

[mercyme]

Thanks, MummyIwanabe! I'm sorry your first IVF didn't work. Hearing how you handled that situation makes me feel hopeful that I wouldn't fall apart.
Kids are so expensive anyway, I wish we could make our own for free. DH is always joking that he could rig up an IVF, as he worked on the genome project with mice & basically did ivf protocols on them. Of course, many of those mice had to be killed for the ET... so, I'm thinking no. Urgh.

 

[Doodar]

Hi Ladies,

Mercyme I feel extactly the same. We are self funded. I know if it doesn't work we will be kicking ourselves and thinking what we could have bought with that money. It kind of makes me feel guilty for thinking like that but I know if we don't do it then I will always be thinking what if and at least by doing it we know we have pulled out all the stops and done everything possible to try and have a baby so I guess its peace of mind. I couldn't live with myself if we didn't try. If it does work it will be the best money we ever spent.

Hope your all well ladies, Have a good day x

 

[MummyIwanabe]

Hey Tory this happened to me, first bleed after cycle was normal and smack on time, second bleed was a week late! Next bleed was back to normal smack on time but heavier. Bloody witch!!

 

[mercyme]

Good luck with the BD, Blue & Leilana!! Wouldn't that be crazy & wonderful if a super-sperm made it through the millions of hurdles?

Thanks, Doodar & mummyiwanabe, I think my mind is working exactly along your lines. I know I'm going to continue to make money for the next 30-35 years at my job -- and if I move up the administrative ladder, then I'll (finally) be making a decent salary. So, will I miss the money in 20 years? Probably not. The real question is: will I regret not trying? And I really think the answer to that is yes. I have the rest of my life to make up that money (I can pick up summer classes, etc.); DH's salary is increasing & will increase as he moves forward in his new career. We can afford it now -- at least, if we sacrifice (for the next couple years) buying a house and going on vacation.

BFN today with FRER (IUI w/clomid & hcg trigger), feeling AF cramps getting worse & worse.

 

[MummyIwanabe]

That's it, that's how to think of it don't regret not trying, if someone said hey you could have a kiddie but it might cost you $ we'd do it

Sorry about your BFN, nothing is more disappointing than seeing BFN when secretly even tho the odds are against us you still think you've got a chance! (well that's what I think anyway!)

I have my scan on 26th August should start drugs around then too. So EC will be early sept ish.

 

[Isi Buttercup]

Sorry about the BFN, Mercyme. We are also self funded, and I'm really hoping we're lucky our first cycle. Praying we can save for at least 2 cycles, by the time we start in September. But I really do pray the first time will work the charm. Good luck Mercyme....and you too Doodar. We're all first timers

Quick question for you lovely ladies. I was just told there is an increased risk of an ectopic pregnancy with IVF. Is this true? I have one blocked tube and one clear one....and am not prepared to undergo another surgery (had a myomectomy in 2008 and ankle surgery in 2009.....not to mention my lap in 2010). Did you have to remove your tubes before IVF?

 

[mercyme]

Sorry about your BFN, nothing is more disappointing than seeing BFN when secretly even tho the odds are against us you still think you've got a chance!

YES! Sometimes hope is the worst! Now that I know this IUI has failed, I really just want AF to show up already so I can start taking real pain meds.

Good luck on your scans, mummyiwanabe!

Thanks, isi buttercup -- I hope first time's the charm for you! And for Doodar.

General question for anyone:
Is there a cycle day on which IVF begins? Or does it start whenever you're ready?

 

[MummyIwanabe]

it depends what protocol you're on. The first time I was on a long protocol so I started tablets on day 19 of cycle then started injecting to down reg on day 21. Then I waited for AF then four days later I started stimming for 12 days then EC.

This time I think I'll be starting drugs on day 3 with no down reg before hand just down reg at same time as stimming this is called short protocol.

I don't think IVF makes us more prone to eptopic. not sure but I've not been told this it can happen like any normal conception that's all I know

 

[Blue12]

I agree with you ladies how this is worth it - although so expensive and emotionally draining - I would have regrets later if I never tried it.

I also never knew that the second af after ivf would likely be late - I really hope that isn't the case for me as the dates may not work for time off for scans for FET.

I have to be honest - I am kind of freaking out about the embies thawing and about the quality of them. I know many average or below average ones have become beautiful babies, and that not all "perfect" embies result in pg - but it sure would be more reassuring to have "high quality" embies waiting for FET. Does anyone have any advice or good info about this quality stuff?

Thanks

 

[Doodar]

HI Ladies,

Isibuttercup I was told there is an increased for ectopic too when doing ivf/icsi I think it is only about a 2% increase though so try not to worry. I think we just have to put these things to the back of our minds and try forget about them.

Mercyme I will starting my treatment on day 2 of my cycle. I have no down reg just start stimming on day 2 and then add a second injection around day 6.

Have a good day ladies x

 

[Gracy 004]

hi ladies hope you are all hanging in there in this never ending waiting game!
Blue, i definately know how you feel about the thaw, i have all the same fears as you. The clinic did say to us though that embies that survive the thaw have about the same chance as a fresh cycle. I am gonna be a wreck the day of et though. They also said that their thaw rate is about 80%, so i hope that means that statistically 3 out of our 4 will get transferred at some point.

Mercyme, sorry about the bfn. I know what you mean too about the cost and having nothing at the end if it doesnt work out. We are in australia and we still pay a fair bit but not as much as the US. Since my miscarriage and all the rubbish that went with it i have often joked and said i wished i had used the money to go back to the UK to see my family cos at least then i would have some good memories , but in actual fact thats not really true. Sure things had a pretty shitty ending for us but i could just as easily be sitting here happily 13 weeks preg and eating pickles! We have decided to go as far with this as money and sanity let us, i sincerely hope it pays off but if it doesnt i will know that i gave it everything as i think regret can be a hard thing to live with.

Well today i started clomid so i can hopefully kickstart my ovaries back into action so i can have my fet, not sure exactly whats going on really. Its funny a sort of strange resigned feeling has come over me the last couple of days and i have just stopped freaking and feel a bit calmer. I will get to do my fet at some point and panicking about when it will be is not helping anything so am just going to wait and see.Having said that one of the clinic nurses rang to discuss my results and gave me a hard time about doing the fet. She was saying that obviously my body was needing more time to recover blah blah blah blah and that most women would wait a few more weeks without trying to force things. Clearly she has never faced infertility and probably goes home to her 3 kids every night. Even though i havent had a period it will probably be about 16 weeks from starting the 1st fresh cycle to the fet. thats long enough thanks and she can get her judgmental nose out of my business

 

[mercyme]

thats long enough thanks and she can get her judgmental nose out of my business

Hee! That sentence made me laugh, Gracy. And thanks for the affirmation of my feelings about the cost. It's really comforting to hear how people have dealt with IVF cycles that didn't result in a live birth -- although I hate, hate that you had to go through it. I hope you get great results from the FET -- at least it's a lot less invasive & druggy than a fresh cycle, right? You sound really calm & peaceful.

Thanks, Doodar, for telling me about your protocol. I guess the next step for me & DH is to do a chart review with our RE to see how to get this ball rolling for Sept. If DH is willing. That's a big IF!! As you can see, I'm already mentally prepared to pay the costs --financial & physical-- but he's still waffling, and I can't pressure him (even though I have a great sense of urgency about all this, which he doesn't share b/c he's not a 35 yr old woman! Gack!).

 

[Gracy 004]

mercyme, dont worry about your other half, I really think he will be very into it when it gets started. My hubby was the same, he wasnt even sure that he wanted to have a child as it scared the hell out of him. Now he is almost as bad as me. I also feel it has brought us a bit closer because we have had a tough time and we are still tight which is reassuring.

No the FET shouldnt have too many drugs involved as long as this clomid makes me ov as we are doing a natural FET. Silly i have never had any probs before but big hormonal fluctuations i guess. For me the absolute worst part of the ICSI cycle was the prgesterone stuff after the EC, i really never want to have that again if i can help it!

 

[mercyme]

That's so encouraging, Gracy -- thanks!
My period should start today or tomorrow... DH is out of town & said we can talk about our next steps on Monday. I think he wants to do another IUI, since we had that one successful IUI in Feb (ended in mc @ 7 wks), against all odds (sc = 1.5 million postwash). But I think that was just a fluke & probably will never happen again. Even the dr was shocked that it worked to begin with -- not a hopeful sign for a repeat. So, I'm just worried about wasting valuable time with another IUI, when we could move on to something more probable. Ugh! Come on AF! I want to take a tramadol for the cramps & get past this BLEHHH!