Just letting you know there will be a change to this section (On hold for feedback)

[CareBear]

That sounds good. Is it just something that would come up that people would have to read the first time people come in here, and not every time they read a thread in this section?

If it's only once, the only thing that might be a problem is if people use the "Unread Posts" to look at new threads, rather than clicking on the section itself to read threads, as I know half the time I don't pay much attention to which section threads are in that way - so you might still get people reading and replying to threads without thinking (although you'd hope that people would check)? Sounds like a good idea though ...I'm half asleep this morning and probably not making much sense, sorry!

I see what you're saying Sam's mum and I think the insensitive comments are made through people reading the threads through the unread posts method and they don't really which section they are actually posting in. I may be wrong though - it was just a thought that came to me after reading your post.

 

[snugglebot]

I am not a member of this section but I want to offer my perspective as a newbie. I think your ideas about restricting this forum are good.

I do read threads periodically when trying to find out information or gain perspective. But you are right, as a newbie, I had/have NO IDEA about the emotions and struggles of LTTTC and only started to respect it after a few weeks of reading entries in BnB and visiting this forum. In fact I was probably one of those "insensitive" newbies that thought I was being helpful but really was clueless. But I now know better (I hope) having had a chance to read and learn more. (I don't bother replying to any posts here anymore - well except this time - don't hate me

I think the post count (if technically possible) is an excellent way to judge if someone has garnered enough information to make an informed response. It would have stopped my posting.

I also like the idea of the "intro" and "terms of use" page as you suggest. My suggestion would be to make it heartfelt and honest because I didn't know how tough it could be until I read about people's true stories about their long roads.

I hope the threads and posts from the LTTCers remains open for reading so that it can continue to be a source of information and educational tool for us newbies. So with that I have no problems being restricted from replying or commenting.

I also think the LTTC should continue be allowed to post in other forums, they are generally pretty sensitive to our "newbie" selves and as we venture out on this journey, we may fumble along. You ladies have a wealth of knowledge in your heads that if you feel you can handle our annoying questions, we would love to hear from you.

You have all taught me valuable life lessons and my "real life" friendships are better now. I hope to still be given the opportunity to learn and grow from this wonderful website.

 

[Alexas Mommy]

What about letting the thread starter decide whether they would allow anyone to reply, or if only the people who qualify for this forum, can reply?(given the decision before the thread is posted) If that makes sense-the reason being because some threads may be more touchy than others, and if it's not a thread looking for answers or whatever, and just a basic |update thread| or something, they may decide to allow anyone to reply. Does that make sense? Obviously I am not someone who uses this section, but I do have a friend who does, and I like to see her updates, and I enjoy sending her support- and whatnot. Just a thought though.

 

[JASMAK]

Please say that this is going to apply for the Secondary Infertility section too. I just got another couple of questionable responses...although perhaps it was through the unread post thing mentioned above, because she seemed unclear of where she was...and had her siggy boasting about her baby....anyway...just checking. And when does this take effect???

 

[want2bamom]

Has it taken affect already?

 

[CurlySue]

It's a good idea. I've been shaking my head in absolute confusion when I've read some of the responses of late.

 

[Kitty23]

there are also a few posts at the moment which have been a bit insensitive considering its a long term ttc section. Bfps announced in here from people who dont post much in here upset me unless they are in the sticky for bfps.

 

[Wobbles]

Will sort this ASAP girls ...

Will force the read of rules for the first time of entering this section when its setup and then I think we'll be able to keep a note of it above the pages too yes!

Sorry we have been a tad busy with home life and a new venture last couple of days but it will be done and has not been forgotten about x

 

[CurlySue]

Sometimes, it's just hard to hold your tongue (or your typing fingers) when someone comes in all "lol" and "xxx" and making stupid responses that are actually not worth the time and effort it must take to click 'reply' and 'send'...

It all probably makes us come across as touchy little wenches but when someone who clearly has no idea comes in flashing their kids around and telling us all we should just relax or flip a coin, and the like, it's really like rubbing salt in.

 

[littlestar]

Sometimes, it's just hard to hold your tongue (or your typing fingers) when someone comes in all "lol" and "xxx" and making stupid responses that are actually not worth the time and effort it must take to click 'reply' and 'send'...

It all probably makes us come across as touchy little wenches but when someone who clearly has no idea comes in flashing their kids around and telling us all we should just relax or flip a coin, and the like, it's really like rubbing salt in.

I saw these posts, i agree they're hurtful and reckless!

I must admit i run a policy where if i can't say something nice or worthwhile that i don't say it. there have been loads of times where i've spent ages typing a response and i've decided not to post. though sometimes other peoples posts do get my back up! i rarely retaliate.

Read & Run isn't useful i admit but at least no one gets hurt!

When will these changes happen, any idea yet?

 

[MissAma]

Just who came up with the "don't read and run" rule?!? -Not a rant to you littlestar! In fact we agree-

I mean geez, DO read and run if you can't add anything of value! I disagree that it needs to be always goodness and light and nice and mushy. I think people should be able to politely disagree or even post something that may seem inflammatory as long as they have the common sense not to hurt other people's feelings! It's SO simple and so very basic netiquette wise.

Our LOOOOOOONG journeys are so complex that if we can never disagree and have to obligatorily each other at all times it will become an insincere, half automated place where we barely ever exhibit real emotions and that would be unfortunate IMO, wouldn't you agree? The only thing I wish people would do when they come in here is stop, count to 10 before posting, not post if they have nothing to say and if they think they do wonder what they would feel like in our situation if they read that.