Life after Loss Support Group........All Welcome :)

[blav]

I learnt a lot from my angel too x

I think it's really positive to look at what they has done for us and how they affected our lives x

I could not agree more with this. Mateo has changed so many things about our life, how we will parent in the future, and has really taught us that babies are amazing miracles and blessings...not that we didn't think that before, but I don't think we realized how fragile life can be.

So, this weekend is my great grand mother's 90th birthday. My family is driving to Northern Pennsylvania from Canada to be there. OH and I live in Virginia and are also going to drive up (7 hrs, ewww) to surprise everyone! It will be a whirlwind trip, just one night because we only have the weekend off, but I'm soooo excited to see my mom and sisters (my sisters ages are 4, 5, and 16). I'm the oldest by a long shot, haha!

 

[SLCMommy]

This is the urn we picked out It'll be graved with his name as well.
Pathology report came back, babe was a boy and perfectly healthy. It was a dysfunctional placenta most likely.

This is what his urn looks like:
https://4.bp.blogspot.com/_7-VbHGufXxY/TOlHwnKeDdI/AAAAAAAAACk/K5O_LhsqPL0/s1600/joe_baby_angel_lg.jpg

 

[jojo23]

awe hun what an amazing urn!! its so beautiful xxxx
im glad you got your report back... i had no reason for losing Lily either they say most likely chromosome issues but the only upside to getting the all clear was i know its was so unlikely to happen again! i hope you get some comfort from it!

Blav its so nice you get to see your family again hope you have an amazing time hun!

AFM well im starting to get more hopeful with everyday that passes, feeling a little more movement as the days pass too! i have bad thrush atm though tmi lol so its pretty annoying! work is driving me a little bit crazy butu im only working part time at the moment so at least its not too bad. hope everyone is good and keep me updated on all the babymaking and ttc etc xxxxxxx

 

[Kelly9]

I didn't even realize that could be an urn, its perfect. It's sad when the reports come back with no real reason but then you do know that you're healthy and like Jojo said it's less worry for when and if you decide to have another. With Hannah she had such a rare tumour (1 in 40,000 live births) that wasn't genetic at all so as crappy and terrible as the odds were that this would happen to her we were reassured that it would be the same chance as everyone else that we'd have it happen again. They also were able to reassure me that her diagnosis was nothing to do with IVF which made me feel a lot better about using our frozen embryos. I'm waiting on the pathology of her tumour, sometimes they can be cancerous though not often so I'm interested to see if anything new comes from that.

 

[DueSeptember]

I am excited for all you and your Rainbow Babies I am still scared to try :*(

thanks hun and its totally understandable being afraid to try... i was TERRIFIED and id say the ladies here are so sick of listening to me moan lol but its completely your decision when you feel ready and theres no need for you to rush into anything! we're all here for you when the time comes that you do feel ok to try xxxxxxxxx

Awww Thank you I do not want to wait 2 long because I am old already lol well im 29 but I dont want to be 2 old you know

 

[OliveBay]

Hi ladies, not been on here much recently as I've been really busy at work and usually only get chance to come on here on an evening but then the website always seems so slow at that time of day and I just run out of patience waiting for the pages to load!

Kelly and SLCmommy - I just wanted to say that I love the urns you've chosen for you little ones.

I hope everyone is doing ok - Helen and Fiona are you still out there? How are you both doing?

I still feel like I'm in limbo until my early scan next week. Everything is going fine I think and there's no reason for me to worry, but I'm anxiously checking the paper everytime I go to the toilet and haven't really go any pregnancy symptoms expect for looking a bit bloated and feeling slight off my food every now and then. I'd just feel so reassured if i woke up with obvious morning sickness - I promise to never complain about any pregnancy symptoms, I just want some reassurance. Hopefully on Tuesday I'll see a little healthy bean and can finally start to enjoy this journey....

Big hugs to you all (and don't forget about me even if I'm not around much!)

 

[Andypanda6570]

Hi ladies, not been on here much recently as I've been really busy at work and usually only get chance to come on here on an evening but then the website always seems so slow at that time of day and I just run out of patience waiting for the pages to load!

Kelly and SLCmommy - I just wanted to say that I love the urns you've chosen for you little ones.

I hope everyone is doing ok - Helen and Fiona are you still out there? How are you both doing?

I still feel like I'm in limbo until my early scan next week. Everything is going fine I think and there's no reason for me to worry, but I'm anxiously checking the paper everytime I go to the toilet and haven't really go any pregnancy symptoms expect for looking a bit bloated and feeling slight off my food every now and then. I'd just feel so reassured if i woke up with obvious morning sickness - I promise to never complain about any pregnancy symptoms, I just want some reassurance. Hopefully on Tuesday I'll see a little healthy bean and can finally start to enjoy this journey....

Big hugs to you all (and don't forget about me even if I'm not around much!)

 

[OliveBay]

Thanks Andrea, I think a good hug is just what I needed! You're always so supportive and I appreciate it so much. How are you doing?

 

[feeble]

Hi honey, i am still here

Just got some great news, we are moving out of temporary accomodation and into a proper house!!!

Which is Just Fantastic, it will be Our House and we can paint it, put shelves up

its got a loft for all those things i 'ahem' really need

Honestly i am over the moon and its a stones throw from town, with great schools nearby

Feeling very blessed today, perhaps my angel is smiling down on me

Also am 12 weeks and 1 day pregnant today! So exactly a week until our scan!!

How you doing? xx

 

[Bride2b]

Hi ladies, Sally I'm glad your doing ok & your early scan is only a week away. I know what you mean about not complaining about symptoms, it almost like you want morning sickness as its a good sign that baby is growing, (although some ladies dont get it & their babies are fine ...... lucky I guess). I know with Bertie I felt nauseous 24 hours a day and I said to my OH that I wasnt going to do it again as I felt so rough! Little did I know, but I would do it 10 times over just to get a healthy buba.

Fiona - fabulous news on the house sweetie!

Hi Amanda, how you doing hunny?xxx

Yes I wonder how Helen is too, maybe she is taking a little break ATM. If you out there Helen, hello!!!! Hope your little rainbow is being good xxx

SLC have you chosen a name for you baby? I cant remember if it was you that had Liam lined up for a boy? Beautiful urn by the way xx

Dueseptember - I cant remember you name! Do you think you are going to try again soon? 29 isnt old hun, but I know what you mean about getting going sooner rather than later. I'm 30 and want a few kids (maybe 3) so I feel I want to get moving on this baby making business.

AFM - AF arrived yesterday (woo hoo) so now this is the cycle I am officially starting to try again. In fact my CBFM just got delivered. Going to start EPO today to get that yummy cm in production ready for a bit of SMEP! Cant wait to try out the Yesbaby too when I hopefully get my peak on cbfm!
I just watched one born every minute and felt really emotional about the midwife saying to the young girl "one more push and your going to be a mummy.' I just cant wait until its my turn! I swear when I finally get my baby I am not going to want to put it down!

Love to all xxxx

 

[collie_crazy]

Hello ladies I'm so sorry I'm not around as much anymore - just want you to know that I do come in and catch up with how you all are and think about you often

I just wanted to pop in and let those of you who arent on facebook know that we found out last night our little rainbow is a boy Think I am finally accepting this pregnancy, finding out the sex has helped a lot already. I admit I was a little disappointed when she said boy as I had secretly hoped for a little girl - but the more I thought about it the more I realised that I didn't want another girl I wanted Emily, and no amount of wanting or wishing is going to make this rainbow be her I am just so relieved and thankful that everything looks great with him so far and hope it continues

Hope you are all keeping well

 

[Hellylou]

Hi ladies - sorry not been around much...

Gemma - great news about AF and best of luck for this cycle!

Amanda - so excited about little fella!

Sally - good to see you're doing ok. It's such a waiting game at this stage, not knowing what's happening. Let us know how your scan goes. I'm sure this time it's perfect!

Fiona - 12 weeks already! Let us know how the scan goes x

I'm doing fine. The cat is out of the bag at work now. I couldn't resist telling - they are all so lovely, more like friends than colleagues, and I'm at the stage where I think they would have to know about it if the worst happened anyway. I'm 9 weeks tomorrow and I have a scan on Thurs 16th, so I'm hoping everything is ok...fingers crossed. I'm certainly feeling pregnant now - bbs are very sore and HUGE, bad nausea, and exhausted, and none of my clothes fit any more! Hang in there, little one! I can't seem to get the idea out of my head that this is a girl. It's so strange! I had no feeling either way with Thomas, but I know I didn't have nausea this bad. Time will tell!

One Born Every Minute was so harrowing to watch this week. I don't know if I should be watching it. OH said to me 'why are you watching this?!' as I sat there and sobbed...I'm a glutton for punishment!

 

[OliveBay]

Amanda, great news about your little boy. I'm so pleased for you and I hope you continue to enjoy this.

Fiona, so exciting about your house. Let the nesting commence!

Gemma, have lots of fun with SMEP I know what you mean about One Born Every Minute. I watch the whole thing through blurry, teary eyes! Its only very recently that I can even bear to watch it at all. It really makes me admire midwives, they do such an amazing job.

 

[OliveBay]

Yay, Helen, missed your post as I was busy writing my own! So lovely to hear from you. I wonder if I may have to tell quite early this time, as I already feel bloated and tend to wear quite fitted clothes for work. I've decided that if all is well at the scan next week I'm going to tell my parents. I really want to tell someone already, I'm feeling so impatient!

 

[FngrsCrossed]

Good morning ladies...it looks like I haven't been around much either, like a lot of us. Busy, busy, busy. Between ,,,'ing,, being ->, , annoying calls, and ; I think all of us have a lot to . Plus I had a "moment" of estrogen the other day and was a sobbing, , almost nasal mucus secreting mess. Oh that estrogen! I started thinking about my baby, that weird positive looking hpt last month, and was wondering if I was even going to OV, and there I went!! I missed him so much and starting 'ing. I am so bad you guys, I made DH feel so bad. I don't even want to mention what I told him because it was not nice and wrong. But it pertained to our baby... Then I ended up showing him that test and he was in denial. I felt like he didn't believe me and was calling me a liar, when the test was staring him in the face on the computer screen. I think I felt attacked by then. But I am so embarrassed and hurt that I did that. I haven't even apologized to him . That's bad enough not to pologize. I know I owe him that much, and I will.. I just haven't figured out how to...yes I have, just waiting til' today. I always just take the straightforward approach to apoligizing. The killing thing is that he has acted as if he knows it was hormones or a woman thing, because he hasn't mentioned it and we have BD'ed a lot since then. I feel so mean! That's not me but I feel like a mean girl or something. Dang hormones, here we go again, I feel all sappy and gooey...

The battle of !! lol God help me. Someone please tell me shame on me so that I can feel better and apologize already...

 

[feeble]

can you do something lovely like cook a nice meal with candles by way of an apology x

then it might come a bit more naturally than feeling like a naughty school girl on her way to the headmasters office LOL

 

[blav]

SMEP started this morning! With our schedules it's easier to BD in the morning than at night. I really hope this works! If I get pg this cycle we would find out right around my due date and my new due date would be right around when Mateo was born so there would be something a little bittersweet but also special about getting pg this month!

It's been slow around here, hope everyone is well!

 

[Bride2b]

Oh yay Britney glad you have started to smep! woo hoo. I cant wait to see if it works!

Sally glad your ok, its not long until your first scan, thats exciting!

Helen its great you have let the cat out the bag, I bet people are really taking care of you at work.

I did write a post earlier on my phone but dont think it worked!

I saw that in 2 weeks One born every minute has a lady on it who lost a baby at 22 weeks & we will see her rainbow, no doubt this will be an emotional episode!

x

 

[Bride2b]

Oh Amanda fabulous news about

Maybe its a good thing that it is a boy so this baby and Emily will have a different identities. But I know what you mean about hoping for a girl as then it might give you an idea of how Emily might have been growing up. I would love a boy next time as it might give me an idea of what Bertie might have been like. I know every child is different, but you cant help but wonder. If my rainbow is a girl I wont complain though, as I could always see myself with a girl and had hoped last time I would get a girl. I do feel guilty about wanting a girl & stupidly even thought that this might be why I lost Bertie as he was a boy. I had said as long as the baby is healthy I dont care, and really I did mean it. But I love the fact I have a son, even though he is in heaven he is my beautiful boy and always will be.

 

[blav]

Oh yay Britney glad you have started to smep! woo hoo. I cant wait to see if it works!

Sally glad your ok, its not long until your first scan, thats exciting!

Helen its great you have let the cat out the bag, I bet people are really taking care of you at work.

I did write a post earlier on my phone but dont think it worked!

I saw that in 2 weeks One born every minute has a lady on it who lost a baby at 22 weeks & we will see her rainbow, no doubt this will be an emotional episode!

x

Oh wow, tears all around for that episode!

I keep seeing a commercial for the new season of that show with the Duggars and it says something about being together through the good times and they show clips of the whole family trying to pick out baby names and the bad times where the show the mom crying at her doctors appointment and then what appears to be the funeral. It makes me burst out in tears every time....I'm tearing up just writing this now. So very sad