Long Term Trying To Conceive Vent Thread

[awifey]

Aunt Flo is two weeks late, but bfn! Blood been sent away for analysis, but I no I'm not pregnant, my body has just decided to be evil, as I usually have a 31 day cycle I thought we would have this last month ttc before hubby gets deployed for 4 months, but no! That's it now! Then when he gets back there will be 3 months before we start Ivf!!
And my family and friends just say, just stay positive , try not to think about it! Have more sex!! They havnt got a clue what these 3 years have been like!!!

That's really frustrating. I'm sorry.

 

[DESPONDENT]

Thanks lawyer chick & bma....lap is probabaly going to eb the next step for me. Dr has said he will do 4 IUIS failing which we will move onto the surgical steps. Truth is I dont even think I can handle any bad news if that they find something serious they cant do anything about during the lap! Silly I know but I guess ignorance is bliss sometimes....
I swear the waiting in between treatments and results is unbearable, its ALL I EVER THINK ABOUT! Every day feels like a damn week...

 

[ickle pand]

Sorry you're struggling Despondant. Has your DH had a SA? You didn't say in your original rant.

 

[amysueno]

I am sure many on here have heard this one before, "just don't think about it" but I hope you are not hearing it from your significant others.

I have been TTC for 1 year 8 months with no luck. I have seen 2 OBGYNs and been to one fertility center. I have had a many blood draws and ultrasounds (one where they flushed water threw the system to confirm no blockages). All Drs have said I and hubby are completely healthy and there's no reason we're not pregnant. I am a healthy weight, I exercise regularly (but have fluxuated this in case I was doing too much), I have begun yoga for stress management, I am praying/meditating regularly, I have changed my diet 12 ways to Sunday, had acupuncture treatments - still no bump. The hubby thinks the fertility folks are taking advantage of me and they're expensive so we have not gone on Clomid. (I also wonder about starting Clomid with no real diagnosis beyond "unexplained infertility".)

All this leads hubby to think our trouble conceiving must be caused by my stress. If so what more could I do? But also, saying it's my stress sounds like saying it's my fault. It makes me so mad/sad to feel blamed after having tried so many things to conceive.

How to stop feeling blamed and isolated by all this?
(Also, any recommendations of routes to being preggers much appreciated.)

 

[Brayr08]

I am sure many on here have heard this one before, "just don't think about it" but I hope you are not hearing it from your significant others.

I have been TTC for 1 year 8 months with no luck. I have seen 2 OBGYNs and been to one fertility center. I have had a many blood draws and ultrasounds (one where they flushed water threw the system to confirm no blockages). All Drs have said I and hubby are completely healthy and there's no reason we're not pregnant. I am a healthy weight, I exercise regularly (but have fluxuated this in case I was doing too much), I have begun yoga for stress management, I am praying/meditating regularly, I have changed my diet 12 ways to Sunday, had acupuncture treatments - still no bump. The hubby thinks the fertility folks are taking advantage of me and they're expensive so we have not gone on Clomid. (I also wonder about starting Clomid with no real diagnosis beyond "unexplained infertility".)

All this leads hubby to think our trouble conceiving must be caused by my stress. If so what more could I do? But also, saying it's my stress sounds like saying it's my fault. It makes me so mad/sad to feel blamed after having tried so many things to conceive.

How to stop feeling blamed and isolated by all this?
(Also, any recommendations of routes to being preggers much appreciated.)

DH and I are also unexplained, but I would recommed starting with the clomid and IUI. I don't know if you have insurance or not, but mine helped cover my meds and ultra sounds. My meds were under $20.00 and I only had to pay copay for the ultra sounds. My IUI costs $320.00 total for the IUI and sperm wash. It honestly didn't work for me, but I had a g/f that is now pregnant w/a little boy due to clomid/IUI. Good luck!

 

[Bma11]

I am sure many on here have heard this one before, "just don't think about it" but I hope you are not hearing it from your significant others.

I have been TTC for 1 year 8 months with no luck. I have seen 2 OBGYNs and been to one fertility center. I have had a many blood draws and ultrasounds (one where they flushed water threw the system to confirm no blockages). All Drs have said I and hubby are completely healthy and there's no reason we're not pregnant. I am a healthy weight, I exercise regularly (but have fluxuated this in case I was doing too much), I have begun yoga for stress management, I am praying/meditating regularly, I have changed my diet 12 ways to Sunday, had acupuncture treatments - still no bump. The hubby thinks the fertility folks are taking advantage of me and they're expensive so we have not gone on Clomid. (I also wonder about starting Clomid with no real diagnosis beyond "unexplained infertility".)

All this leads hubby to think our trouble conceiving must be caused by my stress. If so what more could I do? But also, saying it's my stress sounds like saying it's my fault. It makes me so mad/sad to feel blamed after having tried so many things to conceive.

How to stop feeling blamed and isolated by all this?
(Also, any recommendations of routes to being preggers much appreciated.)

I sent you a message on your board

 

[chefamy1122]

Wow. Thanks for that email saying you are sorry for being out of touch b/c "all those damn kids" have been keeping you busy. Especially since all 4 of them were not planned, and you were too irresponsible to remember to take your pill everyday. You haven't been out of touch, I hid you from Facebook after the 10th bump picture you posted when you were only 3 months along.

 

[Yaya01]

@Amysueno

Yea, "don't think about it and it'll just happen" when that's all I can think about. How can I help it. I just joined this forum to communicate with people who can understand what I'm going thru. Everything is normal except for some fibroids which the drs don't want to remove, one even said I have a beautiful uterus. Ok, so why won't it happen then? I am starting to detest AF for being so faithful. Tried clomid, made me feel awful I stopped. Didn't help me anyway. Every month I hope and pray but AF never fails. Yep, I hear her knocking at d door right now.

 

[LeggoMyMeggo]

4 YEARS TTC THIS FEBRUARY! UGH! Just as soon as I feel like I am at an emotionally healthy place with our infertility, my period decides to go missing, yet every time I take an HPT it is negative! 6 DAYS LATE! I am going nuts! Pretty much assuming my period will eventually come and I probably didn't ovulate for some reason.
We have been on this whole adoption process for a long time and I feel like we are going nowhere! We had a failed adoption last year before even completing our adoption homestudy (The birth mom changed her mind). We gracefully accepted that God has another child for us and that the birth mom has every right to raise her child. Then we moved and 5 months being here we are trying to start the adoption process all over again. I was so on a great mind set of feeling really excited about adoption. Then this month I got discouraged about it (thats another long story of why), and feeling like it is never gonna happen! Feeling angry that I have to take classes, fill out paperwork, be questions and investigated, and pay money to be a mom and for my husband and I to start a family!
THEN, LIKE I SAID, MY PERIOD IS LATE AND I AM FEELING ALL EXCITED THAT I MIGHT BE PREGNANT, YET ALL NEGATIVE HPTS! Maybe there is still hope, and maybe I am pregnant, and maybe my hcg isn't high enough yet, But I am fully expecting my period to start. That's when I can cry hysterically knowing that in a few days marks 4 years of watching everybody else having there 1st, 2nd, and 3rd babies, while my husband and I have been crying out for just 1 child. Seriously, why is it that as soon as I am feeling so calm and not stressing about getting pregnant, that my body plays mean tricks on me! Sorry I am going all over the place with this post! Thank you for letting me vent!

 

[DESPONDENT]

Hi ickle pand Yep he has had a Sa - first one was fine. I put us both on Staminogro vitamins (apparently helps ehnance quality of sperm and eggs as they develop) for the last 3 months or so and turns out the semen quality is getting even better as he has a SA is done with every sperm wash for IUI. Gynae also suggested he drinks Bisolvon Linctus (couth mixture) in the week before IUI, apparently it enhances with semen viscosity. As you can see, I am prepared to try ANTYTHING.....

 

[awifey]

Zero spermies for dh.
AF 3 days early.
PITA day at work.

 

[SweetMel]

Zero spermies for dh.
AF 3 days early.
PITA day at work.

so sorry

 

[Godzuki]

I am sure many on here have heard this one before, "just don't think about it" but I hope you are not hearing it from your significant others.

I have been TTC for 1 year 8 months with no luck. I have seen 2 OBGYNs and been to one fertility center. I have had a many blood draws and ultrasounds (one where they flushed water threw the system to confirm no blockages). All Drs have said I and hubby are completely healthy and there's no reason we're not pregnant. I am a healthy weight, I exercise regularly (but have fluxuated this in case I was doing too much), I have begun yoga for stress management, I am praying/meditating regularly, I have changed my diet 12 ways to Sunday, had acupuncture treatments - still no bump. The hubby thinks the fertility folks are taking advantage of me and they're expensive so we have not gone on Clomid. (I also wonder about starting Clomid with no real diagnosis beyond "unexplained infertility".)

All this leads hubby to think our trouble conceiving must be caused by my stress. If so what more could I do? But also, saying it's my stress sounds like saying it's my fault. It makes me so mad/sad to feel blamed after having tried so many things to conceive.

How to stop feeling blamed and isolated by all this?
(Also, any recommendations of routes to being preggers much appreciated.)

Pah!! This 'don't think about things' and it'll just happen drives me crazy, I can't imagine there'd ever be a time now that I won't know when I'm due to ovulate. Even if we did get to a stage when all hope was lost I'd be secretly wondering if this was going to be the month when a miracle might happen.

If your other half is blaming your stress it might be a good opportunity to get some extra special spoiling. Doesn't have to be financial, I'm sure my hubby has been doing more stuff around the house since we've been ttc. Though I'm mad and find it romantic that he does the washing up when it's not his turn

Re things to do there is lots of great info on this website and others online. I've liked looking round this one today https://www.babyzone.com/getting-pregnant/

Hope you get a bfp soon!

 

[amysueno]

[/QUOTE]
If your other half is blaming your stress it might be a good opportunity to get some extra special spoiling.

Re things to do there is lots of great info on this website and others online. I've liked looking round this one today (website blocked).

Hope you get a bfp soon![/QUOTE]

Thanks Godzuki! The link was helpful... and I think I'll look into that spoiling thing!

 

[lilyV]

DESPONDENT - we are in the same boat as you... well, kinda. We've been ttc for almost two years and our families don't know AND they think we're crazy for having pets and not kids... little do they know...

and to the other ladies who've posted about unexplained. I feel your pain as you're feeling mine.. the frustrations... ugh. don't even wanna think about it.

 

[Charlei]

TTC #1 since 2007. I don't know why the world works the way it does.

 

[ickle pand]

My friends gorgeous little boy just turned 4. We've been trying since before she was pregnant with him and now she has 2 gorgeous boys and has completed her family. Fed up of feeling like I'm trailing behind my friends and have nothing in common with them.

 

[DESPONDENT]

Aaaaaaand so begins another vicious cycle. So much for my 2WW, that wretched witch AF arrived this morning. So that leaves me with 2 failed IUI cycles. Dr says he wants to do 4 before going invasive ie. lap surgery. I dont think my nerves can handle it. Feeling so many emotions right now its hard to put into words...anger, frustration, disappointment, but most of all feel like a huge failure. Its so strange that during every 2WW I tell myself I am not going to make a big deal about it if AF arrives, but yet every time it does I feel like somebody's punched me in the stomach. Hard to even concentrate at work now cos I cant think straight. Amazing how time flies when one is TTC - we've been TTC for 2 years now and feels like it was 6 months

 

[lilyV]

*hugs* so sorry honey. Remember that you've come this far and it'd be cruel to make this your half-way point. You're probably closer to getting your BFP then ever before ...

 

[ickle pand]

Arthritis is flaring up because of a bad nights sleep thanks to my upstairs neighbours having a party that went on past 4am. DH refuses to DTD when I'm in a flare up because he's scared of hurting me and it's mating season, well if ov is going to happen at all this cycle that is.