Long Term Trying To Conceive Vent Thread

[PyrusEK]

Hi Jazzbird, of course you are welcome! I've only been trying for a little over a year, which is not a lot for this board, but feel WAY more comfortable here than on the other boards.

I understand the disappointment of AF all too well. I think most of us do here. I had a cycle a few months back where I had nausea, fatigue, hot flashes...the whole gambit. DH and I had BD'd on all of the right days. I was convinced I was pregnant...and of course I was devastated when AF showed her ugly face. Every cycle I tell myself that I'm not going to get my hopes up, and I inevitably do, only to feel like I've been gutted when she shows.

For what it's worth, I don't think you should give up on your dream of having two children. It may feel like it right now, but it isn't too late.

I second that welcome, Jazzbird! Madtown is right- we all understand, and this board seems to be most appropriate for those of us who really need to vent our frustrations and disappointment. We all get super excited when we think it's finally happening, and we've all experienced that awful let down. This is a place where we can go to remind each other that we're not crazy and we're not alone.

Madtown- I had one of those super hormonal cycles recently, and I was so sure I was finally pregnant that I downloaded one of those pregnancy apps and started planning how I would tell my DH. I tried really hard not to be devastated when AF showed up, but as everyone here knows, sometimes that's nearly impossible. Also, I share your anger/annoyance at people saying all those religious and otherwise cliché bits.

The only people who seem to know what to say are all of you, simply because you're living it too.

 

[DAISYPRENCESS]

I have supper supportive friend who has a child but she never made me feel bad because of this. When I tell her how I feel she always finds the way to cheer me up and make me feel better. I wander why other people can do it. She has a child and she is not in our position but somehow she says the right things. We all need these kind of friends. Just to encourage you and to support you all the way through. =)

 

[Teach2]

My pregnant friend has asked me to be her birthing partner sigh . Enough said there!

Also another friend JUST met someone he likes and I'm thinking that they will get married and have a child before me

SO SICK OF THIS!!!

 

[madtowngirl]

SCREW YOU HULU!

Every other ad is for a pregnancy test. ANGRY!!!!

 

[JJKCB]

there are women on my face book that joke about pregnancy, its drives me insane they post things like:

'Just letting you know im pregnant' - then when tonnes of people comment she comes back and says 'oh, meant to say pooped ive been working all day lol'

or

'im expecting - just thought everyone should know im expecting a little miracle from heaven, although it will change my life, make me take time off work and be hard at times im happy that this blessing is coming into my life so just letting you know im expecting.... snow tonight'

these arent funny, just insensitive and annoying

 

[Myshelsong]

there are women on my face book that joke about pregnancy, its drives me insane they post things like:

'Just letting you know im pregnant' - then when tonnes of people comment she comes back and says 'oh, meant to say pooped ive been working all day lol'

or

'im expecting - just thought everyone should know im expecting a little miracle from heaven, although it will change my life, make me take time off work and be hard at times im happy that this blessing is coming into my life so just letting you know im expecting.... snow tonight'

these arent funny, just insensitive and annoying

I hate these. I cry and scream when I see them.
I am avoiding Facebook this April for fear of April Fools jokes that will just make me upset.

 

[wannabemummyb]

there are women on my face book that joke about pregnancy, its drives me insane they post things like:

'Just letting you know im pregnant' - then when tonnes of people comment she comes back and says 'oh, meant to say pooped ive been working all day lol'

or

'im expecting - just thought everyone should know im expecting a little miracle from heaven, although it will change my life, make me take time off work and be hard at times im happy that this blessing is coming into my life so just letting you know im expecting.... snow tonight'

these arent funny, just insensitive and annoying

I just delete people like this now, not sure I want to be friends with ridiculously insensitive people.

 

[madtowngirl]

I feel so terrible. This girl who I'm friends with on FB has been struggling with infertility, and has an adopted baby. She announced that she's pregnant today on FB with a picture of her adopted child in a shirt that said she's being promoted to big sister. I want to be happy for her, I truly do, but somehow the FB announcement made me angry, and my instinct was to unfollow her.

Has ttc really made me this kind of a person? Am I really this bitter?

 

[wannabemummyb]

I feel so terrible. This girl who I'm friends with on FB has been struggling with infertility, and has an adopted baby. She announced that she's pregnant today on FB with a picture of her adopted child in a shirt that said she's being promoted to big sister. I want to be happy for her, I truly do, but somehow the FB announcement made me angry, and my instinct was to unfollow her.

Has ttc really made me this kind of a person? Am I really this bitter?

Is it bitterness or self preservation? I often ask myself this same question! Infertility is a burden and one that changes your whole outlook on life (imo)

You probably are happy for her but sad for you, and I think thats ok!

It does always amuse me who quickly ltttc'ers forget how they felt once they get their bfp!

 

[wish4mybundle]

Lord i'm just over it all. I've been TTC for 5 years and still nothing. Earlier this year i got 2 BFP that were false. That just about destroyed me and DH. We went on for about 2 weeks crying everytime we saw bby stuff. Now I have this obsession with looking for bby stuff hoping this month is our month but once again it was a bust. I will be having a HSG done Dec. 20th. and i hope that gives me an explanation of whats happening. I know my DH isn't the problem since he has 2 kids from a previous relationship. I hate when he tells me to relax and to take it easy bcuz i feel like he doesn't care as much as i do although he does. But I mean he knows how it feels to be a parent and have kidS.. I DON'T. and he always saying we can adopt in the long run but he doesn't understand i want to go through all the nine yards. I want to feel my bby kick i want to have morning sickness, ultrasounds done, and all that crap. Ugh lord I'm just so irriated. And then all these pregnant ppl on facebook gettting pregnant. PPL i didn't even know had a BF which probably was just a one night stand ugh. FML

 

[Mikihob]

Lord i'm just over it all. I've been TTC for 5 years and still nothing. Earlier this year i got 2 BFP that were false. That just about destroyed me and DH. We went on for about 2 weeks crying everytime we saw bby stuff. Now I have this obsession with looking for bby stuff hoping this month is our month but once again it was a bust. I will be having a HSG done Dec. 20th. and i hope that gives me an explanation of whats happening. I know my DH isn't the problem since he has 2 kids from a previous relationship. I hate when he tells me to relax and to take it easy bcuz i feel like he doesn't care as much as i do although he does. But I mean he knows how it feels to be a parent and have kidS.. I DON'T. and he always saying we can adopt in the long run but he doesn't understand i want to go through all the nine yards. I want to feel my bby kick i want to have morning sickness, ultrasounds done, and all that crap. Ugh lord I'm just so irriated. And then all these pregnant ppl on facebook gettting pregnant. PPL i didn't even know had a BF which probably was just a one night stand ugh. FML

Hi. I am so sorry you are still trying and haven't had your blessing yet. I have only been trying half as long as you am already "over it". I hope you don't mind me asking a personal question.

Have you had DH do any tests to see if he might have a sperm issue? My DH has two bio daughters from his previous marriage and we both thought that he was not the problem until we did a semen analysis and it came back with zero sperm. We are now having him get HCG and FSH injections hoping that it brings back his sperm count. If not, he needs a biopsy so we can have IVF.

Hoping you can get some answers soon.

 

[wish4mybundle]

Lord i'm just over it all. I've been TTC for 5 years and still nothing. Earlier this year i got 2 BFP that were false. That just about destroyed me and DH. We went on for about 2 weeks crying everytime we saw bby stuff. Now I have this obsession with looking for bby stuff hoping this month is our month but once again it was a bust. I will be having a HSG done Dec. 20th. and i hope that gives me an explanation of whats happening. I know my DH isn't the problem since he has 2 kids from a previous relationship. I hate when he tells me to relax and to take it easy bcuz i feel like he doesn't care as much as i do although he does. But I mean he knows how it feels to be a parent and have kidS.. I DON'T. and he always saying we can adopt in the long run but he doesn't understand i want to go through all the nine yards. I want to feel my bby kick i want to have morning sickness, ultrasounds done, and all that crap. Ugh lord I'm just so irriated. And then all these pregnant ppl on facebook gettting pregnant. PPL i didn't even know had a BF which probably was just a one night stand ugh. FML

Hi. I am so sorry you are still trying and haven't had your blessing yet. I have only been trying half as long as you am already "over it". I hope you don't mind me asking a personal question.

Have you had DH do any tests to see if he might have a sperm issue? My DH has two bio daughters from his previous marriage and we both thought that he was not the problem until we did a semen analysis and it came back with zero sperm. We are now having him get HCG and FSH injections hoping that it brings back his sperm count. If not, he needs a biopsy so we can have IVF.

Hoping you can get some answers soon.

Thanks and I haven't had my DH do any kind of testing. I probably should. But I know in big part I am the problem since i have PCOS and irregular cycles aren't helping my situation.

 

[Mikihob]

Lord i'm just over it all. I've been TTC for 5 years and still nothing. Earlier this year i got 2 BFP that were false. That just about destroyed me and DH. We went on for about 2 weeks crying everytime we saw bby stuff. Now I have this obsession with looking for bby stuff hoping this month is our month but once again it was a bust. I will be having a HSG done Dec. 20th. and i hope that gives me an explanation of whats happening. I know my DH isn't the problem since he has 2 kids from a previous relationship. I hate when he tells me to relax and to take it easy bcuz i feel like he doesn't care as much as i do although he does. But I mean he knows how it feels to be a parent and have kidS.. I DON'T. and he always saying we can adopt in the long run but he doesn't understand i want to go through all the nine yards. I want to feel my bby kick i want to have morning sickness, ultrasounds done, and all that crap. Ugh lord I'm just so irriated. And then all these pregnant ppl on facebook gettting pregnant. PPL i didn't even know had a BF which probably was just a one night stand ugh. FML

Hi. I am so sorry you are still trying and haven't had your blessing yet. I have only been trying half as long as you am already "over it". I hope you don't mind me asking a personal question.

Have you had DH do any tests to see if he might have a sperm issue? My DH has two bio daughters from his previous marriage and we both thought that he was not the problem until we did a semen analysis and it came back with zero sperm. We are now having him get HCG and FSH injections hoping that it brings back his sperm count. If not, he needs a biopsy so we can have IVF.

Hoping you can get some answers soon.

Thanks and I haven't had my DH do any kind of testing. I probably should. But I know in big part I am the problem since i have PCOS and irregular cycles aren't helping my situation.

I have PCOS too!! I HATE it!! I took Clomid for six months and only ovulated twice!! I am currently two months without a period now. SIGH. Even if we fix DH's issue, I still might ovulate. It's so hard. PM if you wanna chat and vent.

 

[wannabemummyb]

I have pcos too and hate it my dh also has a kid from a previous relationship and find it upsetting when he tells me to calm down, as you say they've already experienced being parents, i want to go through that too!

 

[tamithomas]

I have pcos too and hate it my dh also has a kid from a previous relationship and find it upsetting when he tells me to calm down, as you say they've already experienced being parents, i want to go through that too!

I know your frustration all too well. Although my DH is not in contact with his daughter for reasons out of his control, he'll slip up and start talking about her at ease but then apologizes when he does because he knows that it's like rubbing salt in the cut. Not that I prevent him from talking about her but just the going all dreamy about it that I can't handle.

The worst was when we had a flood in the basement so I had to clean up and throw out a lot of stuff and landed on his stack of "Congrats for being a father" cards from when his daughter was on the way. I just about broke down in tears thinking he may never get these again thanks to me.

 

[wish4mybundle]

Hello ladies... I am so upset right now... Seeing on Facebook someone I hate post a pix of a BFP I mean she has 3 kids already she doesn't take care of.... She sleeps around and her husband is blinded by her lies... She doesn't work lives off food stamps and a county check she gets monthly... I know some ppl need help from the county but she doesn't even attempt to find a job...But god forbid she misses a party... She's always drinking and smoking weed... Why does god do this... Lord thanks for hearing/reading me vent

 

[SadTeacher]

One of my friends is suffering infertility and writing the trials on her new blog. It is hilarious, worth a read https://shenanigannery.wordpress.com/

 

[wannabemummyb]

My friend gave birth to her baby this morning - she was doing everything to avoid pregnancy, even took the morning after pill, after the condom split, and she gets a baby. Even once she found out she was pregnant, she had a couple of weeks deciding whether to keep it, all the while talking to me about it for advise, when she knew we were LTTC - I then found out I was pregnant a few weeks after she did, but my bean didn't stick.

I am happy for her that she has bought a new life into the world, but devestated for me, that it never gets to be me!

 

[MItoDC]

Ugh. I just told a coworker (who was sipping her tea promoting lactation) that we've been TTC for 16 months and she automatically went into all of the awful advice that we all complain about.

"Well you should just try to relax! It always happens then!" Um. Yeah - we've tried that. Thanks?

"Maybe you just need a little bit of a vacay to help destress and all of that." Um... yeah. We tried that too. Want to see my pictures from our trip to Alaska?

"We only got pregnant after I started carting my CM. Have you tried that?" YES. Geezus. I've been doing it three times as long as it even took you to get pregnant.

"I've heard that acupuncture works. It helps destress you and level everything out!" Right - except we're pretty sure the problem is my DH's low morphology... so me getting stuck with a bunch of tiny needles doesn't sound like a great time - AND it wouldn't work.

Got anything else for me? No? Good. I'm going to go sulk in my cube and complain to my online forums buddies who actually understand what it's like! ERGH!

to all of you for being awesome and actually being supportive!

 

[BakingQueen]

I don’t want anyone else telling me to Relax- I cannot frikin' relax after TTC since 2009! I am sure RELAXATION cannot get someone pregnant….all I need is somebody to listen to me whine and cry, is it too much to ask for?