Long Term Trying To Conceive Vent Thread

[venapols]

ive quit with testing the last two months... I have no less success not testing than I do testing lol

argos where I live was selling clear blue fertility monitors for £4 a few days ago, said it was marked down from £29 but I find for £4 I can buy a 6 month supply of non fancy ones from amazon (although our argos is a funny one, it has no desk or order system you walk straight into the back and try and find your own things with no staff help which might be why its cheaper, its also where the delivery trucks collect from so it might actually be the argos chain storage factory)

 

[EmmyReece]

Seriously thinking about taking a step back from this "friend"

I've been going out of my way to help her pregnant daughter wherever I can and was helping her to look for travel systems last night. She's spotted one that she really likes and wants to look at, so we were searching for the nearest mothercare and we realised that our closest one is tiny and we thought maybe it was better to go to a bigger store. I told my "friend" this and she snapped down the phone "they have a good selection of prams! I should know, that's where I got all of mine from!".

Well I've taken it on myself this morning to phone the store and find out if they have this specific travel system in - and they don't! So how do I tell her this, to save them a wasted journey (1 hour each way), but without looking like I was sticking my nose in where it wasn't wanted?

I'm just fed up, it's as if she assumes that I don't know what I'm talking about because we don't have children. That doesn't mean that I haven't researched things over and over again.

Also, it now looks like af will be here the day that the baby shower is on and I really don't know if I can face it

 

[Hope3]

Emmyreece it's time you put yourself first. You obviously care about others but this can't be at the expense of your own wellbeing.

I would gently suggest to your friend that she should ring ahead to check the stock for herself. Don't tell her you've already checked. If she calls she'll find out for herself. If not it's on her. You're not responsible for her.

You said in an earlier post she would understand if you couldn't make the baby shower. Don't force yourself.

Be kind to yourself.

 

[EmmyReece]

I just feel a bit patronised sometimes by her. Earlier on the phone she was telling me what things to eat and what not to eat. I know it comes from a good place with her, but she can never understand what I'm going through as she's never struggled with her fertility (her 10 children are proof of that)

I think I'm also feeling a bit sensitive as I've made an appointment in a few weeks time to try and get the ball rolling again for some help with ttc. Not sure what they will be able to offer because of my weight, but at least I'm doing something proactive now towards it

 

[Lazydaisys]

So it looks like my Clearblue Fertility Monitor died; it doesn't turn on any more, even with fresh batteries. With this comes the realization that... I have been doing this long enough to wear out a fertility monitor.

Mine died too. Rip useless, stupid, expensive, continuously costly/needy stick hungry, hope shattering, miserable, ugly machine!

Nothing better than a day counter!

 

[laurac1988]

This isn't going to happen is it?
I feel like this is why I need to keep stuff planned for next year. Because we're not having a baby any time soon.
I should be nearly 30 weeks right now. Instead I'm empty.Nothing in there.

 

[DBZ34]

I have a family member that had a baby within the last year. She posted every single ultrasound and random things about pregnancy nearly every day (I blocked her pretty quickly, it was all too much). Then she had her baby and the postings decreased ...but now she's doing this 'one year ago' thing, so not only did I have to deal with her posting last year, now I have to see it all again. I got double bombarded with ultrasounds this morning. Thanks. Just what I needed to start my weekend off right.

 

[nobump]

Why does DH get a cold when it is my fertile weekend!!

 

[EmmyReece]

I can't take it anymore

I've just had to sit here, while the "friend" I mentioned before (who knows perfectly well what we're going through), got her 11th bfp, using one of my tests, in my bathroom, in my 2ww

I feel like a failure and am so close to giving up

 

[venapols]

11th BFP... does she have 10+ children because that's madness?

 

[EmmyReece]

Yep, it will be her 11th child

 

[DBZ34]

I can't take it anymore

I've just had to sit here, while the "friend" I mentioned before (who knows perfectly well what we're going through), got her 11th bfp, using one of my tests, in my bathroom, in my 2ww

I feel like a failure and am so close to giving up

Wait...how did that even happen? Why would she take one of your tests?

How unfair!! I wouldn't blame you if you stopped being friends with her. It feels like she's going out of her way to throw other people's pregnancies (including her own) in your face.

Ugh. I mean, if you think you're preggo, don't take a test in front of your friend whose struggling. That's just common decency.

 

[laurac1988]

I would cut her off personally. No room for friends like that

 

[deafgal01]

Emmy- that's awful of your friend to do that!!!!!! She's not even a friend if she has the nerve to do that.

 

[EmmyReece]

She wanted to hide it from her other children. It gets better, her 2 eldest daughters are pregnant and due the end of December/beginning of January! Which means her grandchildren will have an aunt or uncle younger than them

Definitely will not be going to the baby shower now

 

[laurac1988]

I'm so fucked off. A couple we know actually fuckinghate eachir. They've had sex twice in the last five years. What did they get? Two gorgeous little girls! And they hate eachother! Im not saying the kids will have a bad upbringing or anything like that, because they won't and they are very much loved and wanted, but how come two people who hate eachother can become parents so easy yet this month is cycle NINETEEN. Amy and I are so in love. We're ready! All we want is a baby!

 

[Myshelsong]

IT DRIVES ME CRAZY WHEN PEOPLE COMPLAIN ABOUT NOT GETTING PREGNANT AFTER ONLY A FEW MONTHS

Seriously how do you handle the everyday stress of living???

 

[Lazydaisys]

So tired so blah. Im beyond ready for my bfp 3 + years. Please let it happen soon xxx

 

[Liz217q]

I just joined this website after seeing others vent about longterm ttc. I just made a doctor's appointment with a new gyno to find out why we have been ttc for two and a half years with no luck. I have two baby showers to attend in the next couple of weeks and I know everyone will be asking when I'm going to have a baby. I will smile and say "whenever God decides we're ready" but inside I will be screaming "I don't know when! Or even if I can!" I'm 32 years old & I stopped taking antidepressants 3 years ago because I wanted to start trying for a baby. Here I am, 3 years later with no baby and feeling more depressed about it every month. I get so angry when I hear on the news about people killing or abusing their children and I wonder why God allowed them to have kids when so many of us are trying so desperately to become mothers that would love and protect our kids with every ounce of our being. I'm sick of friends telling me to stop worrying about it. I ask them what the most important thing going on in their lives right now is and when they answer "school" or "my new job" I tell them "Oh, well stop worrying those things and see how that goes!". A friend with a drinking problem has given up custody of her son and swears she is trying her best to get him back. She ended up in the hospital last night from alcohol poisoning. Most of the time, I am a positive person. I believe in getting back what you give in life and try my best to exude love and peacefulness. But right now I am sad and angry and needed to vent to someone other than my well-meaning but unhelpful friends and family.

 

[deafgal01]

Liz- hear hear! Amen to that- I agree I don't understand why the hell people who can't afford their babies, or don't want to be good parents to their babies have them and we struggle.