March rainbows 2018

[maryanne1987]

That's so bad sweetkat. I'd always rather know the truth so I can prepare than be given false hope. I won't use our epu as it brings back too many bad memories, I just can't go in there and to be honest it's so underfunded so the equipment is very old. But you can call them 24 hours a day and get a doctor call back if you are under their care. I'm really hoping everything turns out ok for you.

 

[Sweetkat]

Kirsty, just noticed we are one day apart. I am 8 weeks today.

The dr who did the scan called another dr because he could see fluid on the other side from where the baby implanted. So this woman came in and thought it was blood and said don't worry you will bleed through pregnancy. But actually I wasn't and am not bleeding. I never do. Anyway, she said bleeding is normal.

 

[Sweetkat]

Thanks Maryanne. EPU brings back memories of all three miscarriages for me. So it's not a great place for me. Every dr there knows me. Their equipment is rubbish, but if I go for a private scan they don't have my history or my notes, so they just falsely assume I am a normal patient....

I also had my D&C and gave birth to my DD at same hospital. I was even joking yesterday I want to be a couple of floors up giving birth

I also keep saying oH has really bad fragmentation and a study published by the university of Birmingham says it more than doubles the risk of miscarriage. And they are always like yes maybe, but we don't know for sure. Well I know! Because I have read every article and study there is and the experience of women in online forums!

 

[maryanne1987]

I'm using our fertility clinic for our early scans but I can only do two there as they are so expensive. Like you I won't just use a private clinic because they don't have my notes there. It's such a hard position to be in, I really do hope your ok?

 

[xkirstyx]

I've just realised that Kirsty you are having the same issue.
I need to take my own advice that I have to you and try not to worry as a week is meant to be ok.
I guess need to hold onto the fact that a heartbeat was detected xx

That's great they are going to give you a rescan. They don't want to do another with me and they said baby looks great. I'm not too worried. I just really hope all the spotting im having doesn't mean there's something wrong!

 

[Sweetkat]

I'm using our fertility clinic for our early scans but I can only do two there as they are so expensive. Like you I won't just use a private clinic because they don't have my notes there. It's such a hard position to be in, I really do hope your ok?

I am ok thanks. I knew I am high risk because of OH. Really I should have done IVF or used a donor!

We have fertility clinics here too (london) and I have been to Lister, CRGH and the Portland for scans before, but it's not like they have my history or change the outcome

 

[maryanne1987]

I think that's my main reason for not wanting the early scans this time. I'm fully aware I'm more likely to lose the baby than carry to term so they can't change the outcome. Usually I'm booking in for scans straight away but this time I think I'm just resigned to the fact that I will likely lose the pregnancy and I don't want to see the baby or get attached. I don't know why but I have a bad feeling that I can't shake.

 

[Sweetkat]

Maryanne, I am same. Chances of a pregnancy being successful about 30% (considering my risk of miscarriage is more than double). So I have decided to give it a shot because IVF seemed so drastic, but maybe it isn't. Or maybe a donor...

Maryanne, do they know what's caused your previous losses?

 

[maryanne1987]

If we do lose this one I'm done. I'm blessed with three so will leave it at that. I can't put myself through it again. I'm just exhausted by it all.

I hope this pregnancy works out for you but in the worst case scenario if ivf is an option I'd 100% go for it.

 

[Sweetkat]

Maryanne, IVF is an option as is donor sperm. OH has two children from previous relationship before he started on methotrexate which is causing the DNA fragmentation. So IVF could work if we get a good chromosomally normal embryo but I will carry on trying until I get a rainbow as I only have one DD.

 

[maryanne1987]

Definitely don't give up. I refused to give up when we were trying for number two. Took seven years and we lost a daughter late on but it was all worth it in the end.

 

[karoolia]

Hi everyone,

I'm sorry so many of your are in limbo and worrying. Pregnancy after loss is such a difficult thing. Especially those of us who have had missed miscarriages. I feel like crying every time someone says you are fine as long as you aren't bleeding and cramping.

I am seriously debating an early scan around 8 weeks and honestly can't decide if I want it. I can go to my husband's family medicine clinic. My problem with that is then it will be on their records and the other residents (his colleagues/our friends will know). I can probably live with that, but I'm worried that the scan itself won't do anything to reassure me. Last time baby made it to 8 weeks then died so even if everything is fine I will probably continue to worry. We have a weekend trip to a job fair to recruit for his program with some other residents the weekend when I'll hit 9 weeks. I'm not sure I want to get bad news then have to go away and act all happy, but then again if I'm about to miscarry that information might be good to know before heading out on a trip. I'm 6 weeks 5 days now so I probably need to decide soon.

 

[Sweetkat]

I am 36 almost 37 so we don't have 7 years! That's why I was going to do IVF. I even did an ovarian reserve test and all good in terms of that, but still I need to hurry up big time!

 

[Sweetkat]

Karoolia. I had a good scan at 8 weeks last time (miacarried at 10) and in theory also a good one yesterday. But because of the heart rate and yolk sac size I don't feel reassured. So I don't know if they are worth it.

 

[karoolia]

Karoolia. I had a good scan at 8 weeks last time (miacarried at 10) and in theory also a good one yesterday. But because of the heart rate and yolk sac size I don't feel reassured. So I don't know if they are worth it.

Ya, my experience was similar. I only had the one scan at 10 weeks, but it showed baby had developed to 8 weeks so I know if I had had a scan then it probably would have looked fine.

Have you called back your doctor to talk more about the results of your scan? That might be helpful, just to discuss your concerns more.

 

[Sweetkat]

Karoolia, dr said all fine come back in 2 weeks. To him because everything is within range (even though heart rate is 5th percentile and yolk sac is 95 percentile) it's all fine. So I will have to wait a few days and have another scan.

 

[Sweetkat]

I am debating whether to go for a rescan today. I know it probably won't give me any definitive answers, but this limbo and thinking about whether or not this is a failed pregnancy is just horrible

On top of that I have horrible MS - last pregnancy I had bad MS right up until the day I discovered it was an MMC . So it's not reassuring in any way but just making life miserable.

How are you doing ladies? Any more scans or rescans planned?

 

[maryanne1987]

If your able to do that then I would sweetkat. Then you can also ask about the measurements that concern you and see if they are measuring the same.

 

[Trying4first1]

I am also wondering if early scans cause more anxiety. Maybe I shouldn't go before 8 weeks.
A couple of pregnancies ago I went at just over 8 weeks and I got an answer pretty much straight away. Baby was two weeks behind with super slow heartbeat so we knew that was it and we could prepare ourselves and decide how to handle the MC. Going before always gives the uncertainty and never having a baby measuring by dates I should know better really. But it's like you are drawn to that scanning room as curiosity gets the better of you.
Sweetkat it may be good to get a second opinion as one sonographer can have a totally different opinion to another.
Mine yesterday would have totally missed my little bean if DH wasn't there. Yet another may have found it straight away.
Can't believe we were almost sent away being told there was no baby. So angry thinking about it

 

[Sweetkat]

Have a scan in an hour. Wish me luck (although to be honest I think it's either going to be inconclusive or bad news).