March rainbows 2018

[xkirstyx]

I hope it's nothing. With me brown is very normal with my mc with started pink and got more redder and heavier x

 

[Sweetkat]

Karoolia so sorry you are worried. It could just be old blood or a small haematoma. Try not to worry - although I know it's hard

Re symptoms, they come and go. With my DD I felt fine for days at a time and she was fine

Hugs xxx

 

[maryanne1987]

I have to agree with sweetkat. Synptoms can come and go and not mean the worst. I totally understand why it would scare you though. Keeping everything crossed for you.

 

[karoolia]

Thank you so much!

I haven't had any more brown in the last few hours. Last night I was having a weird pain. It was sharp, on and off, but it was more towards my butt if that makes sense. There wasn't any pain in my abdominal area so it didn't concern me much. DH is thinking it could somehow be related to that.

I think I am traumatized from my last miscarriage. Last time I had one day of pink/brown spotting at 9 weeks, similar to today, I woke up and noticed after going to the bathroom. It took 3 phone calls to convince them to give me a rhogam shot (I'm Rh - , DH is +). When I went in the nurse told me it was probably pointless because I had likely either miscarried or had never been pregnant to begin with (she then told me a story about woman who came in at 11 weeks just to find out there had never been a baby). This all really freaked me out so I requested a scan and they refused for another week. They did send me to get my HCG checked (but only because they said regardless of weeks if your HCG is too low they won't bother with a scan so that had me really nervous), but only did it once so I had no idea if it was rising or falling. Then finally went for the scan at 10 weeks and found out baby had died at 8 weeks. The whole thing was just terrible.

I know a lot of you have had multiple miscarriages and probably worse experiences so I feel bad being so worked up, but it's hard to just let it go and not worry. Thank you for comforting me. I really appreciate it.

 

[Sweetkat]

In the uk they don't give you anti D (I think rhogam must be similar) if you miscarry naturally before 12 weeks (they do if you have surgery or medical management). With my second miscarriage I begged for it and they said they can't give it to me because clinical guidelines don't recommend it. I started bleeding on Wed, went to the hospital on Thurs to give blood and confirm my blood group and they promised me they would give me the shot Friday (I am Rh- and we never checked what OH is). Anyway, on the Friday the dr who was supposed to give me the shot was out and another dr refused to give it. I tried to book an urgent appointment on the Friday and couldn't find a private dr to do it and by Sat it was too late. I was soooooo annoyed.

 

[maryanne1987]

It doesn't matter how many you have had karoolia. It doesn't mean you dont have a right to be worried and upset. Even one loss is heartbreaking and it changes you forever.

 

[Sweetkat]

I was worried even before miscarriages - I think everyone is. But obviously after having one or more it's even worse

 

[karoolia]

Does anyone else ever feel kind of cheated? Like the joy of pregnancy has been stolen, at least a little bit. I see my friends who are pregnant without trouble and I hear them talk about weird things that they experience, but they just brush it off as "just a weird pregnancy symptom". I'm glad they don't worry like I do, but there is a part of me that really wishes I could have the same relaxed feeling that they seem to have.

 

[Sweetkat]

I think it's dependent on the personality. Some people are naturally anxious. And also just because they are relaxed doesn't mean things can't go wrong! But yes, being pregnant after a loss is tough.

I am trying to be philosophical about it....

My friend was co confident she would have a baby she announced at work and to all her friends and family as soon as she found out. Just to have to tell everyone she miscarried 2 weeks later

 

[maryanne1987]

I would be lying if I said I didn't feel cheated. Because I've lost a daughter so late the worry of a loss seems to last so long and I'd love to experience a worry free pregnancy, but it just wasn't meant to be and so I try not to dwell.

 

[karoolia]

I would be lying if I said I didn't feel cheated. Because I've lost a daughter so late the worry of a loss seems to last so long and I'd love to experience a worry free pregnancy, but it just wasn't meant to be and so I try not to dwell.

That's a good point. What has been has been. I'm trying hard to relax and keep moving forward.

 

[xMissxZoiex]

My rainbow is going to be an angel very soon as s/he is ectopic. I'm totally devastated its only been 6 months since my twin boys passed away and I'm still grieving for them, I'm not sure how I'm going to cope with this as well.

 

[maryanne1987]

Oh no xmissxzoiex, I'm so so sorry. Life is so unfair at times. I wish there was something I could do to make things better for you. Have you got people to support you and help you through this?

 

[xkirstyx]

Oh no miss zoie I'm so so sorry xxxxx

 

[Sweetkat]

Zoie - so sorry for your loss . Big hugs xxxxx I hope you are ok physically.

 

[karoolia]

Oh Zoie, I'm so so so very sorry. I hope you have a good support network. I wish I could do or say something to help. All I can do is offer condolences and empathy. I have spent the day fearing the worst so a lot of the same thoughts and feelings have gone through my head, but I know an ectopic is a whole other story. I am so sorry you have to go through this. I will be thinking of you.

 

[karoolia]

So I had some more spotting this evening and decided to go to the emergency department. Fortunately everything was ok. Baby measured at 6 weeks 5 days. By my ovulation date I had counted 6 weeks 6 days so that seems good. Heartbeat was 128 bpm, which according to the doctor is good for that gestational age.

He also told me that the OB I see is the best in the state. He agreed that the nurse who works with the OB can be mean and that it is frustrating that he won't see you until 10 weeks, but he said I should definitely stick with him because when it comes to everything else he is amazing. So that was good to hear.

 

[Sweetkat]

So glad everything is on track Karoolia, fantastic news . I hope you are feeling better, although I know how hard it is to relax when you are constantly fearing the worse....

 

[maryanne1987]

I'm glad you went to get checked over karoolia. Saves you worrying for weeks. I'm so pleased all was well! It's fantastic news.

 

[xkirstyx]

Fab news! X