Moving over from the ttc after loss thread

[GI_Jane]

That's exciting bobster, new baby, new house! Did you put an offer in? Perhaps if in laws won't loan it to you, you could go back to the vendors and negotiate further?. Cheeky that they didn't get a 30th gift for OH.
Maybe tell the in laws your pregnant and then ask for a cheque lol.
Stamp duty is such a con- I think in the US it is called real estate tax?

Bfn today- think I'm 10dpo and af is definitely on her way I am disappointed more than usual because we really put the effort in and dont usually get the opportunity to do that. Next cycle DH will be away so I will look towards a Xmas BFP! Going to sign up for a local 10k run, give me some thing else to focus on.

Are you enjoying the bank holiday bobster- too much rain, typical!

 

[bobster]

Oh no Jane I'm sorry it was bfn you're not out yet though, although I know what it's like when you just know it's not your month. Good idea on doing another run to focus your energies on. How long will hubby be away for? I know it's disappointing when you've covered all bases as it's such hard work to get the timing right but even if you do it's only a 20% chance each time. You are 1 month closer to your bfp so although it's hard try to relax and put ttc out of your mind for this month. See it as a break and enjoy the rest. I think af hormones don't help. I still have my fingers crossed for a late bfp.

I think I sounded really expectant in that last post. We don't expect anything off his parents but they seem to offer us things and then never follow them through and it's frustrating. OH doesn't expect anything either but his little sister has had a completely different life and been very spoilt off them but she is a lot younger. She's rubbish with money though now whereas my OH is great. He had to pay rent from the age of 16 even though he was still at school and had just a Saturday job. When he earnt his first £100 his mum took a cut of £20! I just find it all a bit sad! But it's taught him to be good so maybe it was good in a way.. His sister is really materialistic and spoilt and useless at holding down jobs and is forever ringing in sick so there you go.

 

[bobster]

Forgot to say it's a new build so buying off plan. Don't think we'll be able to offer but may try. We are going back on Thursday to have another look and will go from there. I'm not keen on new builds but the help to buy scheme is too good to miss out on and we wouldn't be able to afford to do work on an old house. Hopefully in a few years we'll be able to go for an old house with some character

 

[GI_Jane]

A new build really appeals to me bobster, sounds great- you know what you are getting and there's no chain to be stressed by.What will the build time be? Assuming you can stay in your current rental until then? Is it a good location? Our house is over 100 years old- added to and modernised over the years by various occupants. It's pretty but certainly has it's problems and limitations! Give me a new build anyday

Af got me today. 14 days from the first positive OPK. It has been a useful cycle using the OPKs and seeing that my o symptoms did tally up with the OPKs so I feel a bit more confident in my cycles from that respect.

 

[GI_Jane]

Did you see the GP and get referred to the midwife bobster?

When did you say your reassurance scan was, 19th sept?

Not long for you mackjess- you feeling positive this cycle? Are you fully settled in to your new home? That's one less thing you've got on your plate now

How's it going Mlm?

 

[bobster]

I'm glad you are feeling positive about a nice cycle. I always find it quite satisfying when af comes exactly 14 days post positive opk, although it's still disappointing to get af. your bfp will be coming up soon. When is hubby back?

Reassurance scan is 14th at 10am. I hope to god it shows something. I feel pregnant, got terrible nausea constantly and sore boobs so that's reassuring me. Yes a new build may be the right thing for us at this point. Your house sounds nice. I just love houses that are a bit older with character as I was always brought up in old houses. I miss open fires and high ceilings with coving. New houses are very boxy but they are practical and don't cost much which is what we need right now.

Mlm is Audrey growing quickly? Is Norah still ok?

Mack how have you done Finns new room? Is it the same theme?

How will you do your next babies nurseries? Will you both find out what you are having again?

 

[mackjess]

Jane, sorry about AF. But I am the same as you and OPKs help me feel positive about a cycle. Even when we weren't TTC yet. I'm supposed to OV Wednesday, so I'll start the OPKs Monday. I am so skeered!!

Bobster, his new room is huge compared to his old room. His tiny furniture looks ridiculous in it!! lol. Haven't redone it yet since we will probably move to a big boy bed soon.

I do wonder how Phez is doing.

 

[GI_Jane]

Happy 7 weeks bobster and one week until your scan

Good luck this cycle mackjess, have you already got more Irish names in mind- I think you had decided Finns name really early on? Is DH excited to be trying again?

I'm feeling pretty bummed- I found my ultrasound report from investigations before we started TTC in 2011. I knew it was suggested once that I had PCOS but I couldn't remember the facts- anyway now I do- the report said my left ovary is polycyctic and the right one is normal. It's the right tube that I don't have anymore. Ties in with my ovulation pains which always come on my right side too. I really need the left ovary to get working or I'm screwed. Will see the GP once we've been trying for 6 months (4 months to go!). We'll keep trying in the mean time in case there is a miracle but I've lost hope really. Hoping it will be a quick fix like clomid or metformin or something.

 

[bobster]

Jane don't worry I know loads of people with pcos who have had children. It's a lot more common than people think and is just not diagnosed. Please don't worry but do talk to your gp as metformin is meant to be really good. Also watching your sugar intakes can help naturally as often people with pcos may be slightly insulin resistant. It may take a bit longer due to only having the one side but don't worry it will happen. Keep dtd around that time like you already are. It's a shame we can't have personal scanners to see what's happening inside isn't it. Did go say that ovulation would still alternative from different sides each cycle? I don't know why I thought the other ovary works more to compensate?

I'm feeling nervous about the scan. It's on the 14th and then the booking in appointment with midwife later on the same day. We've got annual leave and will put Jack into nursery so fingers crossed it will be ok. Still keep thinking I'm jinxing it to think positively. We've told OHs family and they were really happy but not mine yet.

Mackjess good luck for starting opks tomorrow. Any plans for dtd? Are you on BA again? Will you use preseed or anything?

Mlm how are you and your gorgeous girls?

 

[GI_Jane]

Thanks bobster. It certainly gives me the impetus to avoid the snacking on the sugary foods that I do a lot and continue with the low GI foods. I think my right ovary is compensating for the left one which is the problem because there's no tube there. Anyway time will tell I guess. Just makes my efforts to TTC seem futile that's all.

Maybe you and oh could fit in a special relaxing lunch together in between those appointments. I'll be thinking of you

Does jack sense you are growing his sibling or is he totally oblivious?

 

[bobster]

Jane yes good idea to stick with low gi as much as you can. I always find the 2ww the worst for cravings and I think it's because of the rise of progesterone but could be wrong. Allow yourself treats as you need to live. I bet if you express your concerns to your gp they will investigate your left side to see if it's still got cysts. I think you should go sooner rather than leave it as you don't want to be left feeling like it's never going to happen (although it could be a good thing as that's often when it does happen!). I can completely understand your worry but honestly it's hard to know which side you are ovulating from each month. i got so many pains and twinges from the left side when I had my first mc and was so shocked when they said I ovulated from the right. This time I felt more pains on the left again so it will be interesting to see which side it was from again if he tells me.

Keep squeezing Greg and he'll help you through this ttc journey. I can't wait until I know this ones ok to never ttc again as the uncertainty is so stressful and not knowing when it will happen is so stressful.

I don't think Jack has a clue really. I said there was a baby in mummy's tummy to try and get him to be a bit gentler with me and he lifted my top up to have a look and looked confused lol

 

[GI_Jane]

Ah bless him.

Are you all signed up to the new build house? When will it be ready?

 

[bobster]

6 weeks apparently ! Argh!

 

[GI_Jane]

That's super quick! Great you have the flexibility of being in rental if it over runs a bit. Plenty of time to get set up before new baby and certainly in before Christmas

 

[mackjess]

Jane, sorry to hear you are feeling down. I am sure that it is tough, and you may have to talk to your GP and get metformin, but I'm sure you will find something that will work.

Bobster, yay about the new build and coming up on your scan. Very exciting.

Well, I'm out this cycle. We did no babydancing at all. We've had some stress with how things are relationship wise with house/baby/work, so kind of weren't getting along the last week or so. I could have made up with him to try to TTC, but I felt like he was finally understanding me and I didn't want him to think things were OK yet and quit trying to discuss everything. Nothing horrible, just one of those dips I guess when are with the same person for so long. BUT, I feel much better about life now and looking forward to TTC next month.

 

[bobster]

Mack I'm glad things are on the up again with hubby. It's horrible when you go through stages like that isn't it? But I guess like you say it's part and parcel. I can imagine life juggling Finn, work and your new house is tough. How many hours do you work? Have you got any family holidays or trips away planned?

Jane are you feeling any better? Did you book in with your gp? When do you think next ovulation date will be? Did you say hubby is away this cycle so you have a month off from thinking about it?

Mlm how's it going? Is life with 2 babes still going well? Hope you are looking after yourself and getting a break every now and then to rest. Is audrey sleeping much at night time?

 

[mlm115]

Sorry about AF Jane, hope you are feeling ok. I didn't realize that you had pcos, that seems frustrating for you. Fingers crossed for this cycle!

How are you feeling Bobster? Is the morning sickness bad? Almost time for your appointment!

So exciting you are starting to ttc Mack!! I bet it will happen quick for you again.

I'm doing well. Audrey is sleeping better, only getting up once during the night now. It's definitely exhausting being home all day with two, Norah just is always on the move. The k'tan baby wrap has been a lifesaver for me. I also need to get out of the house once a day for my sanity, whether it be to go for a walk, to the grocery store, whatever.

Have any of you done any potty training yet? We kind of started, but I'm just following Norah's lead. I got her a little potty which she has used a couple of times.

Bobster and Jane, any birthday plans for your boys?

 

[bobster]

Wow that's amazing that she only wakes up once at this age. Bet that helps you so much. My friend has a 4 month old and a 2.5 year old and her little one is up every 2 hours!

That's great that Norah's used the potty a couple of times! I dont think Jack is quite ready yet. He tells me when he's done a poo and taps his nappy but if he's doing a Poo and I ask him if he's doing one he says no. He never tells me when he does a wee. I haven't bought a potty yet but I got a trainer seat for the loo. I think I'll buy a potty so he starts to get used to it being around. I think girls are quicker than boys from what I've heard.

We're going to have a quiet family day for jacks birthday this year. I'm going to get a cake and some food like last year but just with less people this time as we had a lot of friends last year. Jacks starting to get shy with people he doesn't see all the time so I think he'll be happier with just out nearest and dearest. I think we're going to get him a balance bike.

What are your plans for Greg Jane?

 

[mlm115]

Omg I would die if she was still getting up every 2 hours! Good luck to your friend! And I think you are right about girls being quicker than boys with potty training, I'm sure I've read that before.

That's a good point about jacks shyness and only having the people he is comfortable with at his party. I didn't think of that. I will have to remember that thought for Norah's bday.

 

[GI_Jane]

Wow that's great that Audrey's sleep has settled down and also about Norah's potty training. I have a book about potty training boys and it mentions girls do it earlier and easier than boys for various reasons. Greg sometimes tells us about his poos but is not reliable. He never says when he's done a wee. He does like to explore the potty and sit on the loo and we let him flush it but he's never actually done anything in there. He put his gruffalo teddy bear in the potty and he thought it was hilarious.

I booked to see the GP on Tuesday 22nd. I expect that she'll say we've not been trying long enough to start any investigations but we'll see. Yes DH is away when I think I'm due to O so it's off the cards for us this cycle.

For Gregs birthday we'll be going to a safari park with soft play etc and then a little party at my mums whose birthday is 3 days before.

Good luck for Monday bobster, I'll be thinking of you. oh by the way are you thinking boy or girl, any gut feeling?

Good to hear you got things sorted with DH mackjess