no welcome drinks

[honeybee2]

would you mind if you went to a wedding but there were no welcome drinks but more wine on the table at meal time?

Last year a glass of pimms was £1.90 per person.

Now with the VAT increase (and another extra on top which Im livid about) its costing £2.55 per person.

I'm upset because before the VAT increase I had all the money to the last penny to pay but now they've increased the money on EVERYTHING (even the corkage has gone up nearly 50%) I feel like saying "fuck it" and not having welcome drinks but using the money what I originally have to providing more wine on the table and paying corkage.

Im so mad how this VAT has meant I suddenly dont have the right money to pay anymore.

...then again not everyone will drink the pimms so would it really be a waste of money anyhow? I know people would rather drink wine than pimms.

 

[twiggy56]

I wouldnt even notice if there were no welcome drinks? And I would certainly care more for more alcohol at the meal where you're in the 'spirit' and theres dancing and an atmosphere!

I certainly wouldnt comment that someone didnt give me a welcome drink...if you had the cash then yeah, but its not as important as meal drinks!

I say you do give them the finger to £2.55 pp for a drink of pims!!! Cheeky fecks!

 

[Mrs Liamxxs]

wouldnt bother me at all hun, i think the tradition of welcome drinks has withered a bit now to be honest hun xx

 

[honeybee2]

oh good! im so annoyed with it!

Ive put the money towards another bottle of sparkling and normal wine per table.

 

[Timid]

I know that it is a matter of opinion, but as a guest, arriving at a celebration, you sort of expect to be given something to drink and something to nibble - which is even more important if your wedding breakfast is some time later.

I don't know, I guess it entirely depends on your timeframes for the day, but doing away with welcome drinks may annoy some guests?

Have you considered something cheaper, like say, offering Sparkling Wine with a raspberry in it? I really honestly believe that if you cut the budget on things like the booze, you may be cutting it in the wrong area...

Just my 2p - I'm sure your day will be perfect no matter what!



Tx

 

[superbecks]

I think seen as thought it is your closest friends and family then they won't mind. I think the £2.55 is expensive to be honest. How long after your guests arrive will they be sitting down to the meal? x

 

[honeybee2]

sparkling wine with a raspberry in it is £5.50 pp!

So if I did that- I'd be doubling my problems.

My main meal isnt untill half 7 and if I have no welcome drink then between 3 and half 7- the guests will have to buy their own drinks.

I suppose in a way-I'm lucky because only our very very close family and friends are coming and they know we dont have much money.

Thing is- I didn't want to compromise on the entertainment. We've got a band and a DJ plus child party bags etc but then again- Ive got these at a very cheap cost, alot lower than normal and I've looked through my wedding finances and there is nothing on there that I could cut. My Bridemaids are paying for their own dresses, the guests are only being fed once, I got my dress of the hanger, my shoes were £10 in the sale, a 4 tier wedding cake is costing me just £200. There is actually nothing else I can cut back on! I'm making my own centrepieces and Im not having any table flowers.

We've tried not to compromise on the food but thankfully my family and his like down to earth pub grub with good portions so I'm not worried about the type of food with the small budget I have. As for the drinks- now that we have no welcome drinks I was able to give 3 bottles of normal wine and 2 bottles of sparkling for the toast per 10 people (per table).

I know guests may expect this and that but I just can't give it to them.

Just what happens when you want a traditional wedding in a half decent place I suppose.

Actually i wont count the ceremony hour as 'waiting time' so really they have to wait between 4 and half 7. I know its 3 and a half hours but there is so much going on between then I think it'll go really fast. My venue just doesnt offer anything food or drink wise that wont cost £250+ and I just dont have it. Now everything (as in the main and important parts) has been saved up for- I now have to save up for things people dont think off like petrol, lunch for me and the bridesmaids on the morning, presents to parents and attendents, guestbook, table plan, candles, my memoir table, thank you cards, bridesmaids shoes, tan, nails, eyebrows...even a new venus razor haha!

 

[superbecks]

You will be fine hun. You're day will be gorgeous and I personally wouldn't be miffed if i didn't receive a welcome drink when I arrived at the wedding. I expect to enjoy the day with them no matter what they give or don't give me. And if anyone would be bothered by it im sure they will soon forget as you are providing half a bottle of wine per person at your meal!!! x

 

[honeybee2]

thanks hun!

Just had another check on how theyve increased their prices and the traditional 3 course meal now starts at £32 PP!

Forgive me whilst I have a heart attack!

 

[sapphire20]

We arent having welcome drinks, most people at a wedding go to the bar and get their own drinks anyway!

 

[booflebump]

I would probably expect a drink, that said, I don't think it would be the end of the world if there wasnt. As long as they will have access to a bar during that time? xxx

 

[honeybee2]

ye- they have access.

Bugger it- no welcome drink. Its not a crime- the kids have access to pre-paid juice anyway, so that saves parents a bit of money. x

 

[princessellie]

did you not get given a quote when you booked your venue? weve been given set price for the whole day which wont go up as thats what weve been told we owe x

 

[honeybee2]

nope not really. They gave me a quote and then said the VAT would be going up- so had no choice really.

Anyway, its not a massive thing...its not like I'm charging them to eat like the previous wedding I went too...or I'm not getting a wedding cake.

Most people will want to drink something different anyway.

I'll give them our budget and tell them we'll have to bring our own drinks in and get charged corkage. If they'd rather give us a package deal then thats up to them but I certainly do not have £4160 for 3 drinks and a set 3 course meal.

 

[Timid]

I was just thinking about corkage - why don't you negotiate a deal with them on that?

If you don't ask - you don't get - why not try to get corkage (regardless of how many bottles) as a fixed fee. Eg. £200 - that way you'll know what to expect?

That way you won't have a worry about how many bottles DO get opened?


Tx

 

[honeybee2]

thats quite a good idea- Ill see what they say.

Im going to see them next month with my MIL.

 

[Feltzy]

Honestly I wouldn't care if I didn't get welcome drinks. I think anything is a bonus and if some people are pissed off that they don't get them then thats their problem. They should be thankful they're getting fed for free! It sounds like you will have more than enough wine on the table anyway, a lot of places only offer 2 glasses per person for the meal.

 

[honeybee2]

I just dont like the fact that people 'expect'.

How can people do that in this day and age- what with a recession?

Mr Honeybee's stepdad said something very interesting the other day that made me think earlier: I just want my guests to have a good time, I want them to think the day and their trouble was worth it but he said "forget about trying to please others- its your day, they should be trying to please you" and the more I think about it, the more I think that its important to play host, but you cant please everybody and if they truly deserved to be invited then they truly wont mind if what is provided- as long as they are there.

So maybe I should trust myself and my friends and family to appreciate that I can't do everything.

 

[Feltzy]

I agree. They're there to celebrate you and your OH getting married, not to see how many freebies they can get. I'm sure no one will care xx

 

[Feltzy]

Oh and just to add we've been got by the VAT rise too even though we booked our wedding before the rise. We got a letter to say that if we wanted to pay at the agreed lower rates we'd have to pay before the VAT went up, which we weren't in a position to do. It'll cost us an extra £250 on top of the deal we booked.