"Only female volunteers over 18 can change diapers"....

[robinator]

Going slightly OT, many churches do pairs or same sex policies with prayer, too. If a man wants prayer at an altar call, a man or a husband/wife team will pray for him. A woman gets a woman or a team. Probably because many churches believe in touching someone while praying. So it's not just with children; it's providing a safe environment for everyone. Some might view this as over the top, and I agree that it is, but again, it's about a church covering its ass from an accidental slip of the hand. Or an accusation of one.

But I digress

 

[beth_terri]

Although after writing that Ive just thought, we wouldn't be bothered if our child was in the hands of a male Dr/nurse so why would a man changing nappies be a problem. Hmm

I suppose it's because due to safeguarding etc doctors/nurses are never alone with children. There's always someone else in the room if you're not. Like if LO was having an operation or something, the room would be filled with people. If nappy changing was going on in a nursery setting or something similar i'd hope that it would be done in pairs and not with the person alone with the child... male or female. But i suppose we're not there so can't be sure what's taking place...?? Just a thought xx

In my sons nursery that he used to go to the nappy change area was a big open area so nothing suspicious could go on and it was always done in pairs xx

 

[Emma&Freya]

Ive not read many of the replies but just think id add my own comment and read later

Sean changed Freyas nappy in public toilets were there was a changing sign thing.

When he was changing her, the amount of people who worked there who came in to check that everything was ok was unbelieveable! When he told me he said I felt like I couldnt even change my own daughters nappy.

I went over to complain and said if it was a woman why dont you do it then? They said they did, few days later I took Freya to change her and noone checked me?

Its shocking. My Dad feels uncomfrtable when I change Freya infront of him because of how things are turned round!

 

[preggymammy]

I get that it is rediculous to an extent... even with women in childcare. I mean, as a teacher I am often faced with (the younger kids) wetting themselves or for PE the kids have to get changed and some do ask for help as they're used to their parents dressing them. Even though I have been CRB checked, i'm not allowed to touch the kids really.

If that kid was wet themselves, the best I can do is walk them to the toilets, give them dry clothes and tell them to go inside and get changed then come out when they're ready. Even with that there has to be another member of staff with me incase the child accuses me of touching them inappropriately.

Saying that though if a child comes to me for a cuddle or to hold my hand or sit on my knee that's fine, just so long as there's another adult in the room. In some ways I think the whole safeguarding things is OTT in schools but on the other hand I understand why it's needed.

 

[LDC]

It's dangerous territory now isn't it.

I think it's sad that this is what it's come to. Plus who is to say that the female over 18 isn't going to do something that she shouldn't? It's not just men that get involved in sick sick activities.

I also had a male midwife during my labour and he was wonderful, I preferred him to the woman I had!

I'd like to think that anyone working with children, no matter whether professional or voluntary, have a CRB check and I wouldn't be concerned if my childs nursery had male workers - in some ways i think it promotes stereotypes in different professions because of this kind of thing...also with things like male stewards on a plane or make hair dressers; people always assume that they must be homosexual because of their choice of job!

The over 18 is probably a safe guarding devise so children can't be blamed if something happened. I also think as pp said open spaces would be ideal to stop anything untoward happenings or at least reduce the likelihood.

It's sad what our world is turning into

Xx

 

[bubbles123]

It's even adults! There is a notice at my Doctors asking if people want a chaperone for their appointment. What do they think the doctor is going to do to them? It all signals a breakdown of trust in society that is good for no one. The reason we hear about these sort of cases is that they are so incredibly rare. We can't let these incredibly rare instances make is scared of people around us.

 

[preggymammy]

It's even adults! There is a notice at my Doctors asking if people want a chaperone for their appointment. What do they think the doctor is going to do to them? It all signals a breakdown of trust in society that is good for no one. The reason we hear about these sort of cases is that they are so incredibly rare. We can't let these incredibly rare instances make is scared of people around us.

Snap! Mine does too!x

 

[skunkpixie]

It's even adults! There is a notice at my Doctors asking if people want a chaperone for their appointment. What do they think the doctor is going to do to them? It all signals a breakdown of trust in society that is good for no one. The reason we hear about these sort of cases is that they are so incredibly rare. We can't let these incredibly rare instances make is scared of people around us.

Yup same at my doctor's surgery. The male doctor had to call in a female chaperone just to feel my tummy when I was pregnant! Must be compulsary in some PCTs.

 

[preggymammy]

It's even adults! There is a notice at my Doctors asking if people want a chaperone for their appointment. What do they think the doctor is going to do to them? It all signals a breakdown of trust in society that is good for no one. The reason we hear about these sort of cases is that they are so incredibly rare. We can't let these incredibly rare instances make is scared of people around us.

Yup same at my doctor's surgery. The male doctor had to call in a female chaperone just to feel my tummy when I was pregnant! Must be compulsary in some PCTs.

I suppose even though the Dr is just doing his job, there needs to be someone else in the room when they 'touch' you incase you accuse them of touching you inappropriately. Same when dealing with kids and vunerable adults/elderly xx

 

[Emma&Freya]

It's even adults! There is a notice at my Doctors asking if people want a chaperone for their appointment. What do they think the doctor is going to do to them? It all signals a breakdown of trust in society that is good for no one. The reason we hear about these sort of cases is that they are so incredibly rare. We can't let these incredibly rare instances make is scared of people around us.

Yup same at my doctor's surgery. The male doctor had to call in a female chaperone just to feel my tummy when I was pregnant! Must be compulsary in some PCTs.

Isnt it sad what workers need to do now

 

[My_First]

^^^ to a small extent I do get this as there are some religions where the woman is not allowed alone in a room with a man, so I do think that's the norm in most surgeries to cater for the whole community.

 

[Wellington]

That sign up at the doctors surgery isn't just to protect the patient.....

....some patients will always have a female nurse accompanying them, even if the doctor is female. Because, unfortunately in life, there are people who will get kicks out of making completely unfounded accusations. If there were only two people in the room, who are you going to believe?

When I was training we were even taught that a relative or friend couldn't do, it would have to be an impartial nurse. Otherwise, it could be seven years of training down the pan because some sicko says something happened, that didn't!


Looks like none of us can win either way!

 

[Unexpected212]

I don't get it. My OH has never had issues changing diapers and is more than happy to offer to do it and do it.

I don't see a problem with men/teenagers/women or anyone changing diapers as long as they are family. Or workers that have had the checks.

Saying that though I'm only happy changing the diapers of children in my family. I don't know why! Obviously I couldnt avoid it if i worked in daycare etc.

I only want family to change my son too. It's not cos I'm paranoid or worried it's just I'd rather only family do it.

When he goes to daycare i will want to know everyone has had the appropriate checks.

I don't know it's hard. On one side I think it's sexist. but the more I think about it I am more comfortable with a woman changing my LO's nappy than a mans :/

Very confusing subject.

 

[mommytobe11]

both DH and i are uncomfortable with any other man changing LOs diaper, or taking care of him. i don't feel like it's sexist, i'd rather be on the side of overly cautious than risk someone harming LO in ANY way.

it's sad we have to feel this way, but there are way too many sick people in this world. recently near where i live, a man jumped over the fence at a "woman in distress" type of place for abused teenage girls and raped 3 of them. and then a couple weeks later, a man that worked there raped 2 of them. this is the world we live in unfortunately.

 

[sg2011]

What a sad attitude some people have about men (of any age) looking after children. Believe it or not, my brother is going to be nanny to my daughter when I go back to work in 3 months. He changes her diapers and plays with her all the time. He loves her to death and would never hurt her. I trust him to be her caretaker more than I ever would some strange woman at a daycare center or in her own home daycare.

Personally, I think society is headed down a very dark path. Yes, some men (and women) are pedophiles but not all people need to be demonized because there are some ill people in this world. My DH is very hands on...changes diapers, baths, feeds, plays with out baby all the time. I don't think I'm better or more qualified to do those things than him because of all this "mothering" nonsense. Some men are better at being fathers than women at "mothering".

 

[onetwothreebp]

Depends on the situation... if the male changing the nappy is the babies Dad/Grandad/Brother then I see no issue. If the male changing the nappy is of extended family or someone who isn't related or connected to the child at all, then I have a problem.

that is an incredibly naive and foolish thing to say considering majority of the children that was abused, are abused by a relative.

 

[preggymammy]

Depends on the situation... if the male changing the nappy is the babies Dad/Grandad/Brother then I see no issue. If the male changing the nappy is of extended family or someone who isn't related or connected to the child at all, then I have a problem.

that is an incredibly naive and foolish thing to say considering majority of the children that was abused, are abused by a relative.

So you're saying that i'm naive and foolish to say that it's ok for immediate family to take care of LO but not for extended family or strangers.... interesting, so I assume no one looks after your LO but you, not even your DH?

 

[onetwothreebp]

i think you should be on your guard, regardless who is changing your lo's diaper, that's all. men related to you shouldn't get a free pass.

 

[preggymammy]

i think you should be on your guard, regardless who is changing your lo's diaper, that's all. men related to you shouldn't get a free pass.

I'm sure my Dad and my DH will appreciate that...

 

[bumpy_j]

^^ PP is making a fair point tbh, no-one unless the relative in question had previously abused would expect their own relative to abuse their child. But of course it happens