Planned Teen Pregnancy?

[Aidan's Mummy]

No one is doubting you as a mum but when you said he was 18 alarm bells rang. I would hit the roof if that was my daughter
xx

 

[EmandBub]

oh no! ofcourse i'm not doubting your abilities as a mum
i don't know you or anything about you
i was just wondering about the situation
when my daughter is 13, i sure wouldn't let her go out with anyone over 15!
x

 

[Bride2Be]

I know that you guys aren't trying to judge my abilities or anything and thank you for that!

 

[EmandBub]

sorry if that was how my post came across
i'm just worried tbh
xx

 

[nicholatmn]

I've read this entire thread and I can't really offer any advice or anything you were looking for from the original post...

but good luck with your baby! xx

 

[Tanara]

... im 18 and my OH is 23, so its the same age diffence but i guess morally its okay cause im of age. Sorry i agree that its kinda weird in a sence but at the same time, my OH is 5 years older than me. So i kinda feel hypocritical saying anything to do with that.

 

[Desi's_lost]

I'm on the fence on this one. Historically speaking, the age difference is nothing. Physically, no harm comes to her simply because he is 18. It is only our culture that makes us wonder if the relationship is moral or not. But i think if her parents are okay, her safety is probably not in any danger.
Honestly, I cant say anything because my fob is a piece of dog doodoo, and he's 18. Where her fob is handling everything maturely and responsibly.

 

[azzii]

Im 19 and have been with my fiance for almost 3 years, and have lived with him for 2. We are getting married next week. And we planned this pregnancy after having a miscarriage earlier that year.

 

[EmandBub]

wow Azzii can't believe you're full term in 3 days!
x

 

[rubixcyoob.]

I'm on the fence on this one. Historically speaking, the age difference is nothing. Physically, no harm comes to her simply because he is 18. It is only our culture that makes us wonder if the relationship is moral or not. But i think if her parents are okay, her safety is probably not in any danger.
Honestly, I cant say anything because my fob is a piece of dog doodoo, and he's 18. Where her fob is handling everything maturely and responsibly.

Her OH is 20 now, not 18. He was 18 when they first met.
It wasn't if the relationship was 'moral' or not in my eyes. I genuinely was concerned. 1 and a half year relationship which they weren't together for a whole year during it, an 18 year old proposing to a 13 year old and a 20 year old wanting to live with a 14 year old. It just caused alarm bells to ring in some girls heads.

It also wasn't the 'moral' issue of age differences that made me iffy. He's 20 and she's 14. That is illegal and he could be put on a sex offenders register. Anyone could press charges unfortunately since he was over 18 when they first started sleeping together and she was 14 or under. It doesn't have to be brought foward by her and the issue of consent is not raised at that age difference :/

 

[AriannasMama]

I have read through this and don't have much to say either but if your parents are OK with your relationship then charges can't really be pressed, depending on state laws, whether TTC was wrong or right at your age doesn't matter anymore because it's already happened.

So, good luck on everything, I am sure it will all turn out fine

 

[Lydiarose]

When i was 13 i was seriouslly taken advantage of by a man much older than me who was 18,
at the time i thought i was so grown up and that he was the best thing in the world its only now that im older i can see what an evil evil person he was.

I thank god that my dad dealt with it and i never saw him again i remember how upset both of my parents were and i have been traumatised by it to this day,

Im sorry but what man of 18 in there right mind would go out with a 13 year old girl? Not only that but ask them to marry them and have children?

Are you sure your parents know about all of this? I find it hard to belive if it was my daughter the police would be involved.

 

[Desi's_lost]

While there are many terrible people out there, there is the chance that her OH is a genuinely good person. so we should not put him down.

 

[Lydiarose]

Also did you know what he is doing is actually illegal?Im trying to word this as sensitively as i can but have you thought about what the authorities will do/say when they realise this man is 18 and you are 13/14? which they will when your baby is born?

 

[Lydiarose]

Im sorry but no . . . an adult man should not be behaiving this way with a barley teenage girl she is a child and this seriouslly sets alarm bells of for me.

 

[vaniilla]

While there are many terrible people out there, there is the chance that her OH is a genuinely good person. so we should not put him down.

if he was as you say then he would not be having sex or proposing to a pre-teen, I really agree with lydia, something is seriously missing either to this story or to the parents, if he is a nice guy then he sure isn't behaving like one by his actions, just my 2 cents worth. I really feel for the poster and hope that things will not turn bad.

 

[veganmum2be]

age difference is a hard one. that difference in adults would not be a problem.

but when a child is involved, which you are a child, it does get iffy, and that is a huge age gap if i am right in reading its 20 and 14?

but whats done is done isn't it. all the best with that one! xx

 

[Bride2Be]

When i was 13 i was seriouslly taken advantage of by a man much older than me who was 18,
at the time i thought i was so grown up and that he was the best thing in the world its only now that im older i can see what an evil evil person he was.

I thank god that my dad dealt with it and i never saw him again i remember how upset both of my parents were and i have been traumatised by it to this day,

Im sorry but what man of 18 in there right mind would go out with a 13 year old girl? Not only that but ask them to marry them and have children?

Are you sure your parents know about all of this? I find it hard to belive if it was my daughter the police would be involved.

Yes. They have considered letting us live in the same house before. Many people have approved of our relationship because he is NOT a bad man.

 

[Lydiarose]

I also really feel for this girl because i see how i was in her,
i was very manipulated and taken advantage of.

I cannot belive how naive some people on this thread are desis lost how old are you? because that is a very very immature thing to say.

I did not come on here to start an argument but this really rings alarm bells for me and it should be taken very seriouslly.

 

[Lydiarose]

When i was 13 i was seriouslly taken advantage of by a man much older than me who was 18,
at the time i thought i was so grown up and that he was the best thing in the world its only now that im older i can see what an evil evil person he was.

I thank god that my dad dealt with it and i never saw him again i remember how upset both of my parents were and i have been traumatised by it to this day,

Im sorry but what man of 18 in there right mind would go out with a 13 year old girl? Not only that but ask them to marry them and have children?

Are you sure your parents know about all of this? I find it hard to belive if it was my daughter the police would be involved.

Yes. They have considered letting us live in the same house before. Many people have approved of our relationship because he is NOT a bad man.

Well if thats really the truth i can assure you that no parent i know would condone this it is illegal and extremelly wrong.