@jellybeanxx
Oh love I’m so so sorry. This ttc business is just so so hard .
I really do think I’m going to be trying for over a year this time or it’s just never going to happen.
I hate being negative, but when it’s month after month after month after month and still no baby it just stinks doesn’t it.
I wish so hard we would all just fall and it stick and go on to have a healthy baby.
Sometimes I feel like screaming,
And the fact even if I do get lines I can’t trust not even blazing dark lines because my lines were absolutely blazing with the miscarriage in June. So if by chance I do get lines again I’m gonna be a nervous wreck about it all ending in tears again.
I’m sending you so much love right now love. That deep longing and it just not happening is a horrible horrible feeling.
hugs love. Im over in the October group so will see you there. Would be nice to not need to be in the November group and have sticky BFPs instead but I have a feeling I’ll be in the November and December and probably Jan testing group.
I really was hoping it was going to be easier this time but nope
Tbh I have this feeling that I’m just not going to get my rainbow.
My AF is normally so so heavy and it wasn’t heavy this cycle, was only medium. And it was less heavy last cycle too, but this cycle it was even less heavy. I’ve always always been heavy. So I feel like my body might be starting to go through the change, and we all know what that means no baby ever again.
Sometimes I think I should just count my blessings and accept I probably can’t have any more.
But my heart longs for one more so so badly.
But if I’m too old then there isn’t much I can do about it.
I thought AF was out the building but having a bit more bleeding now but should definitely stop tomorrow by cd6. Although the last 2 cycles I did have spotting until cd8. Will start the opks In a few days , probably cd8 but not expecting to see a peak until way later than normal. Unless I do ovulate at my normal time but the maca messed it up in April so I expect it will do the same now.
I don’t get it though because it never affected my ovulation when I started taking it in November 2020. The latest I ovulated on it was cd15. But I was 40 then and now I’m 42 nearly 43. Weirdly even on the maca I ovulated on cd10 when I fell with Harley. I would love that to happen again. I had a BFP by cd20 it was great. Oh gosh them cycles you didn’t ovulate must of been awful. Absolutely awful. I hope u ovulate every cycle now.