Arrrghhh I just wrote such a long post and couldn't post it because I put a website link in! I pressed back and it erased everything I wrote! Guess I'll just have to start over!!
I'm just writing to check in on everyone. Boyfriend's best friend and his girlfriend had a baby girl today.
It was so adorable to see BF on the phone with his best friend, just as excited as he was about him having his first baby. They made plans for us to come and see them tomorrow in the hospital. My best friend also just announced she's pregnant, she got pregnant in December. I'm happy for all of them but still feeling disappointed it isn't me. My BF doesn't even know I'm doing this soy experiment, no one does really except you all! I just don't know anyone else who has any fertility problems, everyone seems to mention they'd like to have a baby and then just magically gets pregnant. Or, they're trying not to get pregnant and do anyway! Worst is that I do child welfare for a living, so I investigate people who abuse and neglect their children on a daily basis.
BF already has a ten year old son so I know he knows how all this works and must be wondering why every month we have so much sex, use no birth control, and I still get my period. It's probably a bad idea but we just don't talk about it. He knows how much I want to have a child, and I feel like he doesn't want to unleash the floodgates by mentioning that it's not happening. Or we're both just in denial..
But anyway, enough of that.
I popped on to ask a question. I really never temp or use opks but I did have some old opks from probably two years ago that have been sitting in my medicine cabinet. They're Answer brand. They expire May 2011 so, since I've been dying of curiousity since I took the soy, I decided to pee on one today because I just got the beginnings of some (hopefully) cm.. I took it about half an hour ago at 5:30PM. I got the faintest of pink lines next to the control line. I mean, so faint that I had to squint and hold it to the light to just see anything and could see nothing when I laid it flat on the sink. The only thing I do regularly is track my cycles on a website (which I won't type again for sure!!) called cycles page. It says I'm on cd 9 today and my most fertile (green) days are 9-13. Says my most fertile day will be 12, Wednesday the 12th. I don't think I ovulate on my own, I have PCOS. I do get a period every month though, but its pretty light and my cycle is anywhere from 24-33 days. Usually 27. Is that faint pink line always there next to the control line? Will it get darker now every day until I ovulate? How often should I repeat the test? I only have five more sticks so I don't want to waste them. I feel like it might have been too early to do this test.. Sorry for all the questions, just confused! I've always ignored this side of ttc because I don't want to become completely obsessed but it's hard not to! I just want to know what my body is doing and if the soy is making a difference.
hun. Wahhoooooo. Evap lines are grey in colour, almost like a shadow of a line or like an indent. I dont think that is an evap at all. Whispering congrats. Wonderful news 
