Spanking kids can cause long-term harm

[Ruth 1980]

That's my opinion. I'm not asking anyone to like it. I don't care if you do. But if you want me to respect yours, which I do ........

Hmmm, you think calling someone a child abuser is *respecting* their opinion??
Obviously where you come from you have a very different idea of what respect means

 

[Natsku]

I think you have a misunderstanding of spanking. I don't remember ever being spanked so hard I couldn't sit down. I doubt any parent here spanks that hard either.

 

[pinklightbulb]

^ I don't smack anywhere other than the back of the hand.

 

[Natsku]

I remember getting the slipper and even then it didn't hurt so much I couldn't sit down.

 

[pinklightbulb]

I used to get the spatch lol... owwwwwww!

 

[Divinebeauty]

You spank a child, the child cries and holds his bottom, his bum is red and he doesn't want to sit on it for a while afterwards. How does this not cause pain? And why would one spank their child if they didn't intend to cause pain?

Again, I reiterate. Everyone is entitled to an opinion. There is no one way to raise children. But I think we would all agree that no-one wants to hurt a child.

Wow what kind of spanking are you talking about? That would be beating. I have never spanked my child and had him grab his bum out of pain and not be able to sit. unreal. This does not cause pain because the spank is not hard at all if you read I said TAP. And of course 1 would spank their child as a form of dicsipline when no other measures worked. There are other reasons to spank than to cause pain.

Maybe a guilty conscience?

You are always butting into conversations. Don't think you need to suggest I have a guilty conscience!! Of what I spank my child I admitted it, its my way to parent so what, i dont feel like being put down over it!

 

[Ozzieshunni]

Ignore me then. No one says you have to engage me.

 

[Divinebeauty]

I think hitting your child in any form is abusive. If your child cries out in pain, then you have hurt them, and how is that different from abuse? It's the lazy man's way out from parenting. "I choose not to take the time to teach my child this lesson, so I will hit them instead". Use your words, not your hands.

That's my opinion. I'm not asking anyone to like it. I don't care if you do. But if you want me to respect yours, which I do as you are entitled to whatever thoughts you like, then you need to respect mine. You feel different from me, and that's okay.

And why do people like to claim someone is aiming at them? I am barely even looking at names right now.

I take my leave of you all. Silliness!

^^^^^^^^^ Words in bold- Look pretty aimed at me

Anyways done with the bickering. I was not happy you came in here so rude attacking one side..... fine if u dont spank but don't throw out negativity at the ones who do.

 

[snowflakes]

This thread will just end up going in circles. I think there are lots of effective ways on paper on how to discipline a child. What is less clear cut is we are all dealt different children with different personalities.
I really don't think ANYONE on here would use smacking as a first option but as a very last resort after using different techniques.
I think its all too easy to sneer and make accusations of child abuse when you have children which DO respond well to a verbal telling off or other such measures.

Exactly this. I said that I was not going to spank, so there for, I do not believe I will go that route in disipline, but who knows... Every child is different and responds to disipline in different ways. I can understand where calling it abuse is quite offensive to those on here that said they will or have spanked. I think that went a bit to far. Remember you can have your opinion but, you can also watch how you word it, in order not to offend or hurt anyone. If you feel it is abusive than keep that to yourself, because it does come off as highly offensive to some on here. There is a WHOLE thread that pertains to what I'm trying to say called, "why does everyone have to judge, rant," or something like that. Just play nice!!! Please, thank you!

 

[MizzDeeDee]

I think you have a misunderstanding of spanking. I don't remember ever being spanked so hard I couldn't sit down. I doubt any parent here spanks that hard either.

^^^WSS

I never was spanked so hard that my bottom was red and I couldn't sit either.I don't know what your definition of spanking is, but I'll wager that most parents that spank DON'T do that.

Telling parents that they are abusing their children is just a shitty thing to say. It may be an opinion, but it's an inflammatory one.

As for the guilty conscious comment.... if the PP felt guilty about it then they wouldn't admit they did it and defend it.. now would they? In fact, I would venture to say that the pp clearly feels she did nothing wrong- which means she feels she has nothing to feel guilty about.

She.. among others clearly feel attacked, which, with the comments above isn't very surprising. Insinuating that a parent should feel guilty or saying that they are abusing their child isn't exactly a way to have a productive discussion.

 

[whit.]

And why do people like to claim someone is aiming at them? I am barely even looking at names right now.

I take my leave of you all. Silliness!

How are your posts not aimed at parents who do spank?

Maybe a guilty conscience?

Have you added anything to the thread other than snide remarks?

 

[Ozzieshunni]

Well everything appears to all be directed at divine because shesso angry when anyone says anything at all negative. If she's secure in her parenting method why is she constantly defending it? If you're happy with spanking, fine. Stop jumping on everyone thinking they are all against you.

 

[Ozzieshunni]

By the way, whit. I don't appreciate being followed around BnB trying to poke holes in all my responses. If you have an issue, pm me because I think this all stems from your other thread.

 

[Natsku]

So you should defend your parenting methods if you're secure in them? If someone told you that you're sexually abusing Alex by breastfeeding past 6 months (which is something some people genuinely believe) surely you would be offended and defend yourself? I just don't see how anyone can think its ok to call someone here a child abuser for following a common discipline method (in an appropriate way, not an abusive manner which I understand does happen with spanking but I doubt any parent on BnB does it that way)

I don't spank and don't intend to (as far as I know yet) but even I'm offended by those comments and it takes a lot to offend me.

 

[Dragonfly]

Well everything appears to all be directed at divine because shesso angry when anyone says anything at all negative. If she's secure in her parenting method why is she constantly defending it? If you're happy with spanking, fine. Stop jumping on everyone thinking they are all against you.

I didnt even look at divines comments before I posted

 

[Dragonfly]

So you should defend your parenting methods if you're secure in them? If someone told you that you're sexually abusing Alex by breastfeeding past 6 months (which is something some people genuinely believe) surely you would be offended and defend yourself? I just don't see how anyone can think its ok to call someone here a child abuser for following a common discipline method (in an appropriate way, not an abusive manner which I understand does happen with spanking but I doubt any parent on BnB does it that way)

I don't spank and don't intend to (as far as I know yet) but even I'm offended by those comments and it takes a lot to offend me.

I have a son called Alex to and breastfeed past 6 months so not sure if you mean me. But I have been told that with my children by some unknown online faces, dosnt bother me as I know its not sexual abuse it is natural to breastfeed and if people who spank think thats natural then why they not secure enough to think that?

 

[Natsku]

So you should defend your parenting methods if you're secure in them? If someone told you that you're sexually abusing Alex by breastfeeding past 6 months (which is something some people genuinely believe) surely you would be offended and defend yourself? I just don't see how anyone can think its ok to call someone here a child abuser for following a common discipline method (in an appropriate way, not an abusive manner which I understand does happen with spanking but I doubt any parent on BnB does it that way)

I don't spank and don't intend to (as far as I know yet) but even I'm offended by those comments and it takes a lot to offend me.

I have a son called Alex to and breastfeed past 6 months so not sure if you mean me. But I have been told that with my children by some unknown online faces, dosnt bother me as I know its not sexual abuse it is natural to breastfeed and if people who spank think thats natural then why they not secure enough to think that?

I was talking to ozzieshunni but works for you too (forgot your son was Alex too). You don't even get angry when people say things like that? Not even at first?

 

[Dragonfly]

No . And believe me I had some stupid names thrown at me pedo and all. But its not the same as breastfeeding hitting kids.

 

[Natsku]

And spanking a child (appropriately i.e. a light tap not done out of anger) is the same as child abuse. And I imagine that people who actually have suffered child abuse would be very offended by the comparison.

 

[Divinebeauty]

Well everything appears to all be directed at divine because shesso angry when anyone says anything at all negative. If she's secure in her parenting method why is she constantly defending it? If you're happy with spanking, fine. Stop jumping on everyone thinking they are all against you.

I am so angry? No I think I may be offended would be the proper word. You started with how I am a child abuser, then 2 other people come in here attacking me JUST like you were intending to do. I am secure in my parenting methods completely.

I have stated I do spank my child, I have stated the reasons as to why I have told you what I do BEFORE i spank my child I have defended myself completely yet you people still go on I 'abuse' my child.

Reason I fight back is because it is RUDE, INCONSIDERATE, DOWN RIGHT DISRESPECTFUL to come on here and tell someone they are abusing their child! Of course I am not going to just walk away and be like ahh its okay you can just think I abuse my child. hah no.

You should be the one to talk.. stop jumping in. PP says something to me and you jump in ' guilty conscience'. You had no reason to even say a comment other then to try to fuel me which were your exact intentions.

What pissed me off the most, is I am now called a 'child abuser'. Why because I discipline my child differently then other people? So ridiculous.. and so hurtful..

I am not going to sit here and take rude comments from PP, just know I will ALWAYS defend myself.