step parents support thread

[tallybee]

Hey ladies, have been mia for a few days. Nice to see some fellow TTCers in here too. Beware, the bitchface will become a megabitch face when you dare have children!!!

We held a memorial service for our little girl we lost a few weeks ago. Had to wait a few weeks to get back results etc. Anyway, we had never told anyone we were pregnant as we wanted to wait until we were sure we were 'safe' due to our loss of our little boy last year. We told the kids after we lost Evie. It was hard for them to understand and probably very confusing to miss something you never knew existed.

Anyway, I wanted to share the heartfelt email from the megabitch.....
This is the email my husband sent to her.:
Hi *****
On Thursday 12th we are having a small service for our little baby girl who we recently lost during pregnancy. The service is at 4pm & I would like to pick up the boys from school & drop them back at your place at around 6ish. I have spoken to the boys & they would both like to come. Also if it is possible, I would like to swap weekends 20-21 & 27-28 May around. I know its late notice but something rather important has come up.
Can you let me know ASAP.

Thanks,

***.

This is the heartfelt response:
***,

Picking them up tomorrow is fine but I can't swap the weekends as we have plans.

*****.

Any other person would have said something along the lines of "sorry for your loss" or similar. Even if they dont care, most people still say something. To be honest, if she had said anything I wouldnt care either. I would think she was lying, she's not sorry at all. But the fact that she said nothing just shows what a total megabitch she really is. Especially as she knows we also had a loss last year.

It's just too much to expect any humanity out of these bitchfaces isn't it.....
How horrible for you, as if it's not difficult enough dealing with losses without nasty people butting in.

As for us, I have come beyond giving a shit what bitchface wants. She has already said and done enough that I will never again be surprised or appalled by anything she does because she's scum that'd do anything really. If (when) we get pregnant that will not change. She can say/do what she wants, she's losing her grip. Those boys are getting old enough to make their own decisions, and with them actually getting to make their own arrangements with their dad, she matters not!

xx

 

[netty]

mellybelle

Hope you are ok - so sorry for your loss

When i had Alex I had to have a crash section and had a general anaesthetic and had to been in ITU for 24 hours when he text bitchface to say SD could not come to the hospital that night all she replied was "as long as the baby is alright that is all that matters - shame ** cant come and see the baby tho"

bloody ignorant people!!

 

[tallybee]

mellybelle

Hope you are ok - so sorry for your loss

When i had Alex I had to have a crash section and had a general anaesthetic and had to been in ITU for 24 hours when he text bitchface to say SD could not come to the hospital that night all she replied was "as long as the baby is alright that is all that matters - shame ** cant come and see the baby tho"

bloody ignorant people!!

They are just so wrapped up in their own little bubble of entitlement aren't they.

 

[blaze777]

Oh I am so glad I've found this bit!!

Background
DH and I got together in Nov 2006. He was living alone and I kinda moved straight in.
DH has 4 children with the bitter EX
D - now 17
S - now 13
D - now 12
D - now 11

Ex does nothing but slag me off to her kids, and how I stole their dad away from them etc. She is still saying that our 15 month old isn't my husbands and telling the kids that it's not their sister.

GRRR and of course now I am pregnant again the brown stuff has totally hit the fan. DH is now not allowed to see his kids because according to his ex, he's just trying to replace the ones he has by having more!

I really really hate that woman!!

 

[tallybee]

Oh I am so glad I've found this bit!!

Background
DH and I got together in Nov 2006. He was living alone and I kinda moved straight in.
DH has 4 children with the bitter EX
D - now 17
S - now 13
D - now 12
D - now 11

Ex does nothing but slag me off to her kids, and how I stole their dad away from them etc. She is still saying that our 15 month old isn't my husbands and telling the kids that it's not their sister.

GRRR and of course now I am pregnant again the brown stuff has totally hit the fan. DH is now not allowed to see his kids because according to his ex, he's just trying to replace the ones he has by having more!

I really really hate that woman!!

What a fucked up individual she is!!! So sorry you are having to deal with her shit.

All the best xx

 

[Amber_Lynn822]

She can't legally do that, Have you already gone to court?

 

[pinkflamingo]

What is wrong with these women?!! When DH applied for parental resp (had to do so through the courts as bitchface refused to just sign the forms because she 'didn't see why she should'!!) the judge asked her to provide a report stating the reasons why she thought DH was not fit to have parental resp. We got a copy of it sent by the solicitor and it was literally 20 pages of her slagging him off! One reason was that she had asked SS what screensaver his dad had on his phone and SS said it was of me and him. She stated that any father who cared about their child would have a pic of them and not their girlfriend!! The solicitor said she laughed when she read it all and of course the judge granted parenral resp out of court cos it was clearly all just her being a pain in the backside and refusing to comply.
These women care more about causing us issues than they do about the welfare of the kids. Someone had said previously that the bitchface they have to deal with is losing her control and thankfully we have reached that stage too. You just have to stand up to them and take no cr@p from them. There have been a couple of times when she has used SS as her negotiating tool but we have put our foot down to make her see that its her actions that result in him missing out on stuff. She hardly does it at all anymore as she knows it doesn't work and he is now at an age where we explain things to him honestly so he knows what's going on.
Stupid women!!!!!! Xxx

 

[tallybee]

What is wrong with these women?!! When DH applied for parental resp (had to do so through the courts as bitchface refused to just sign the forms because she 'didn't see why she should'!!) the judge asked her to provide a report stating the reasons why she thought DH was not fit to have parental resp. We got a copy of it sent by the solicitor and it was literally 20 pages of her slagging him off! One reason was that she had asked SS what screensaver his dad had on his phone and SS said it was of me and him. She stated that any father who cared about their child would have a pic of them and not their girlfriend!! The solicitor said she laughed when she read it all and of course the judge granted parenral resp out of court cos it was clearly all just her being a pain in the backside and refusing to comply.
They don't care about the kids at all xx

It's such a joke! Why the Eff do they think they'll get taken seriously talking shit like that?

Stupid moo! Doesn't see why she should eh.... maybe because it benefits your children you fuckwit! They really are the centre of their own stupid universe aren't they!!!!!

 

[tallybee]

Got OH's boys coming on Friday for a sleepover!

xx

 

[Mellybelle]

Got OH's boys coming on Friday for a sleepover!

xx

Good stuff.....I have a long story to tell about bitchface, but dont have the time to do it right now.....Will update later and need some advice.../

 

[tallybee]

Got OH's boys coming on Friday for a sleepover!

xx

Good stuff.....I have a long story to tell about bitchface, but dont have the time to do it right now.....Will update later and need some advice.../

 

[pinkflamingo]

Got OH's boys coming on Friday for a sleepover!

xx

Fab news hun! Have a great time together xxx

 

[Amber_Lynn822]

So ladies, I know I'm a little late for ranting on this, but....
Am I the only one who wasn't even acknowledged on mother's day? I was pretty hurt and I kept waiting for my husband to say something to me, but he never did. So at 11:30 at night I text him letting him know I was hurt that he hadn't said anything and did he not think being a step-mother counted?
He wrote back saying he didn't know if he should or not (Since we're TTC and I'm not pregnant) and didn't want to upset me.
I didn't believe him for a minute... SO unfair. When we lived in the same state as BM I ALWAYS made sure to do a "project" with my Steppie for her mother. And I always got a homemade card from her, I didn't even get that this year. It really crushed me....


Am I over-reacting?

 

[tallybee]

So ladies, I know I'm a little late for ranting on this, but....
Am I the only one who wasn't even acknowledged on mother's day? I was pretty hurt and I kept waiting for my husband to say something to me, but he never did. So at 11:30 at night I text him letting him know I was hurt that he hadn't said anything and did he not think being a step-mother counted?
He wrote back saying he didn't know if he should or not (Since we're TTC and I'm not pregnant) and didn't want to upset me.
I didn't believe him for a minute... SO unfair. When we lived in the same state as BM I ALWAYS made sure to do a "project" with my Steppie for her mother. And I always got a homemade card from her, I didn't even get that this year. It really crushed me....


Am I over-reacting?

I can understand why you're upset hon. I don't think he meant bad but it's still crap.

 

[Mellybelle]

Men are stupid. Youre not over reacting hon. He just didnt think the right way.

 

[Mellybelle]

Ok....heres my story. Cut very short.
DH and I met 7 years ago. He had two boys I had one girl. We got married. We had one boy.
My SSons live half with us, half with the BM (bitchface, megabitch etc). She lives 25kms from us and the boys go to school right near her house. I drive the boys to and from school when they are with us. My daughter goes to a school close to us and I am doing a 1 and a half hour trip each way on the school run with my LO in tow. He is now 3, and I have been doing this driving since he was born. My eldest step son is due to start high school next year. We want him to go to the same school as his sister (my daughter) but the bitchface doesnt want this. Our high school is a private school and one of the best schools in the area. Its not too expensive and we have agreed to pay all costs. DH asked her repeatedly not to discuss the issue of high school with SS, but she did. Also told him that it would be his choice where he goes to school. Naturally, he would want to go to the school where his friends are. We never discussed high school with SS and didnt want him to have to choose between what each parent wanted. She also told him he would have to choose where he wants to live. I've never heard of any other parents letting their children choose where they want to go to school at age 12. I thought it was common sense that this was a decision to be made by parents. If SS goes to high school out there, i physically cant get 3 children to 3 differnt schools on time. My LO will start school in 2 years, then I have to get 4 children to 4 different schools. Also we are TTC so hopefully there will be another LO in there somewhere. I know that a major reason she doesnt want SS to go to our choice of school is because she will have to do some driving the kids to school and she really doesnt want that. Is it unreasonable to expect the kids to go to high school closer to us as they have atttended primary right within walking distance from her house. It would be so nice for my school run to be 8kms instead of 50!!!!

 

[netty]

Got OH's boys coming on Friday for a sleepover!

xx

have a lovely evening tonight

 

[netty]

Ok....heres my story. Cut very short.
DH and I met 7 years ago. He had two boys I had one girl. We got married. We had one boy.
My SSons live half with us, half with the BM (bitchface, megabitch etc). She lives 25kms from us and the boys go to school right near her house. I drive the boys to and from school when they are with us. My daughter goes to a school close to us and I am doing a 1 and a half hour trip each way on the school run with my LO in tow. He is now 3, and I have been doing this driving since he was born. My eldest step son is due to start high school next year. We want him to go to the same school as his sister (my daughter) but the bitchface doesnt want this. Our high school is a private school and one of the best schools in the area. Its not too expensive and we have agreed to pay all costs. DH asked her repeatedly not to discuss the issue of high school with SS, but she did. Also told him that it would be his choice where he goes to school. Naturally, he would want to go to the school where his friends are. We never discussed high school with SS and didnt want him to have to choose between what each parent wanted. She also told him he would have to choose where he wants to live. I've never heard of any other parents letting their children choose where they want to go to school at age 12. I thought it was common sense that this was a decision to be made by parents. If SS goes to high school out there, i physically cant get 3 children to 3 differnt schools on time. My LO will start school in 2 years, then I have to get 4 children to 4 different schools. Also we are TTC so hopefully there will be another LO in there somewhere. I know that a major reason she doesnt want SS to go to our choice of school is because she will have to do some driving the kids to school and she really doesnt want that. Is it unreasonable to expect the kids to go to high school closer to us as they have atttended primary right within walking distance from her house. It would be so nice for my school run to be 8kms instead of 50!!!!

our bitchface has let sd make all the decisions about what she does and where she goes and virtually every decision since i have known them too (since about age 8). I strongly believe children are children and need to advised and guided by adults! Irritates me as she is so spoilt and doesnt like it when we put in rules out our house!

 

[tallybee]

Well... OH has just called from work to say there's a 'critical incident' which basically means the shit has hit the fan and they're calling in every team to deal with the breakdown of some system they deal with. The company can lose astronomical sums for every hour the system's down, so he won't get away until things are at least patched up He started to ask me if I could pick the boys up to which I said yep of course, then he said 'no don't cos if I'm in here all night (possible) they won't see me anyway and I may as well just cancel! I told him not to be so daft, I can collect the boys (even though he took the car to the station so he could bring them back, I can go get it anyway), they can see him tomorrow even if he's in work late late! I couldn't believe he was saying he'd cancel on them it made him sound just like my ex, in that moment. I know it's not OH's fault if shit's hit the fan at work, it's such a pisser that it's today of all days! But we haven't seen the boys in so long! We can't cancel!! And doing that would just allow bitchface to confirm in her mind that OH is a useless ^£$""£%%"&£"!!!!!

WTF do we do!! I'm waiting on OH calling me back to see how things are at his work.

Ahhhahahahgggghhhh!

 

[tallybee]

Ok....heres my story. Cut very short.
DH and I met 7 years ago. He had two boys I had one girl. We got married. We had one boy.
My SSons live half with us, half with the BM (bitchface, megabitch etc). She lives 25kms from us and the boys go to school right near her house. I drive the boys to and from school when they are with us. My daughter goes to a school close to us and I am doing a 1 and a half hour trip each way on the school run with my LO in tow. He is now 3, and I have been doing this driving since he was born. My eldest step son is due to start high school next year. We want him to go to the same school as his sister (my daughter) but the bitchface doesnt want this. Our high school is a private school and one of the best schools in the area. Its not too expensive and we have agreed to pay all costs. DH asked her repeatedly not to discuss the issue of high school with SS, but she did. Also told him that it would be his choice where he goes to school. Naturally, he would want to go to the school where his friends are. We never discussed high school with SS and didnt want him to have to choose between what each parent wanted. She also told him he would have to choose where he wants to live. I've never heard of any other parents letting their children choose where they want to go to school at age 12. I thought it was common sense that this was a decision to be made by parents. If SS goes to high school out there, i physically cant get 3 children to 3 differnt schools on time. My LO will start school in 2 years, then I have to get 4 children to 4 different schools. Also we are TTC so hopefully there will be another LO in there somewhere. I know that a major reason she doesnt want SS to go to our choice of school is because she will have to do some driving the kids to school and she really doesnt want that. Is it unreasonable to expect the kids to go to high school closer to us as they have atttended primary right within walking distance from her house. It would be so nice for my school run to be 8kms instead of 50!!!!

Holy crap! There are going to have to be some discussions about this..... you cannot be expected to physically do such insane school runs I don't know how it works where you are regarding school buses? I really don't know what to suggest hon, but u need to make sure your voice is heard because if your OH or anyone else is seriously thinking you can ferry kids to all those different schools they need to try it themself!

xx