Stopped BCP & TTC! Whos with me?!

[Gagrlinpitt]

Thanks Gagrlinpitt. I've been up and down. Mostly, down. I'm feeling better today, I think it's from impending weekend and time with DH. I've been praying a lot at night and I've noticed God hasn't left me. I was talking with patient and her DH and they uplifted my spirit. Then I left and heard a song, ah, I can't remember it's name, but it's message was to keep going don't let people stop you from your goals. It was special to me and I felt God's warmth so I think I'm on the road up. Anyways how are you?

Always remember that.. Regardless of how lost your feel God will always be there. It's so easy to feel lost and alone but God will never leave your side.

AFM, I'm doing good. Had my four year wedding anniversary yesterday. Saw my therapist on Wednesday and she told me about something Lisa Bevere talks about in her book "girls with swords". She said God Sword is Gods Word.. And to remember that whenever we feel down to just reach out to God and he will guide us.

 

[Angel5000]

Thanks Gagrlinpitt. I've been up and down. Mostly, down. I'm feeling better today, I think it's from impending weekend and time with DH. I've been praying a lot at night and I've noticed God hasn't left me. I was talking with patient and her DH and they uplifted my spirit. Then I left and heard a song, ah, I can't remember it's name, but it's message was to keep going don't let people stop you from your goals. It was special to me and I felt God's warmth so I think I'm on the road up. Anyways how are you?

Sometimes that's what we need. There's a song that I grew up singing at our church called "Father God (just for today)" and for some reason when I'm really anxious/nervous/upset it brings me so much calm. I don't know why. I'm not very religious person, and don't go to church very often since high school, but I do still pray and that song is often my peace.

 

[Flueky88]

Yes, sometimes I think we just need reminders. I know I'm blessed and I will gt pregnant but sometimes bad thoughts creep in my head.

Oh and I think AJANGEL asked about SA. We are going to wait at present. It's $150 and I think we are going to wait for 12 cycles ttc before we look into testing. Just going to have some fun and not worry about ttc. You'll be having a baby before we know it

 

[Gagrlinpitt]

Yes, sometimes I think we just need reminders. I know I'm blessed and I will gt pregnant but sometimes bad thoughts creep in my head.

Oh and I think AJANGEL asked about SA. We are going to wait at present. It's $150 and I think we are going to wait for 12 cycles ttc before we look into testing. Just going to have some fun and not worry about ttc. You'll be having a baby before we know it

You know that's when people usually get pregnant.. When they stop trying

 

[Angel5000]

I just finished my Masters Presentation of my Thesis and Action Research Paper and....I PASSED. They said they were incredibly impressed with both my project and my presentation and they mentioned this two or three times! I'm so happy. Of course I've had all of the committee members as professors before so that helps a little too.

I have never been so relieved! Now I just have to finish up one or two small things, survive the last 3 weeks of the school year with my students and I will be on summer break and able to relax and hopefully enjoy this pregnancy!

 

[Gagrlinpitt]

I just finished my Masters Presentation of my Thesis and Action Research Paper and....I PASSED. They said they were incredibly impressed with both my project and my presentation and they mentioned this two or three times! I'm so happy. Of course I've had all of the committee members as professors before so that helps a little too.

I have never been so relieved! Now I just have to finish up one or two small things, survive the last 3 weeks of the school year with my students and I will be on summer break and able to relax and hopefully enjoy this pregnancy!

Angel yay. Congrats!! I know that was stressful.

AFM, I'm 5dpo and starting to get intense breast pain.

 

[Ajangel25]

Flukey that definitely makes sense!! And I'm so glad God is reminding you that he's still with you. Im still grieving my mom but God shows me he is still around too! I'm going to keep you in my prayers

Hope everyone has a great memorial day weekend!!

 

[Angel5000]

gagrl - you have lovely temps right now. Is the breast pain normal for you?

 

[Gagrlinpitt]

gagrl - you have lovely temps right now. Is the breast pain normal for you?

Yeah.. I don't know if it's been this bad though I feel like I got socked in the chest however I'm not symptom spotting this time. I don't want to disappoint myself again.

 

[Gagrlinpitt]

I dunno why I do this to myself.. I said I wouldn't test until I was late and then I crack and it's stark white... And I'm disappointed. Ugh!

I just had a huge breakdown.. I know we are only three months in to TTC, but I'm just so sad.. My brother in law who isn't married or even in a relationship gets a girl pregnant accidentally. And while I'm stoaked to be an aunt again.. I'm also angry and jealous... Why not us, what's wrong with us.. I know so many people whom are pregnant right now and I am so happy for them.. But just so sad for us...

 

[Ajangel25]

Gag- 7dpo is way too early to have a positive test, so don't be sad yet!! Also don't forget it can take a healthy couple a year to conceive. It sucks though, I know, I felt the same way when TTC! It took me 6 months and that felt like eternity and I know there's others who it's taken a year or longer. It doesn't seem fair when others get pregnant who don't want a baby and then it takes longer for people who are trying.. But it WILL happen for you!

 

[Angel5000]

Gagrl - Remember that 7DPO is really way too early to test. We all do it, but chances of getting a positive this early are really really slim.

It's perfectly acceptable to be frustrated and angry. It doesn't feel fair, I know, and I have been there! It took me 14 months, and 2 CPs, and there were many many times when I felt like the world and God must be against me. You'll get your time. It is normal to take at least 6months to a year to conceive with a perfectly healthy couple and perfectly timed BD. Each month even in perfect setting it is only approximately a 25% chance of conception. It sometimes helps to put things in perspective, so if you haven't seen it yet, check out "The Great Sperm Race" (you can watch it on youtube). Very informative and definitely puts things into perspective. DH and I really enjoyed it.

All of this doesn't mean we are saying that you shouldn't be upset, it's definitely okay to be sad and frustrated and angry, but also remember that you have time.

 

[Gagrlinpitt]

Angel and Aj, thank you ladies. I'm sure my bfp is coming soon but in the process of waiting.. It sucks.

 

[faye1019]

Gagrl: I totally get it... with my cycles as long and unpredictable as they were/are, I thought we'd never get pregnant.... I was feeling frantic and anxious and regretful that I hadn't gone off the pill earlier. Try to keep your head up and you will get your BFP. Think about how incredible it is that your cycle and body regulated so quickly. You have a nice short cycle and you are ovulating! All good things.

And try to resist the urge to test again for a bit... way too early!?

As for me, I am in hibernation mode this weekend catching up on my grad school class and finishing report cards. It's honestly fine by me and I've been sitting out on our patio typing away, catching up on laundry and just relaxing.

I honestly feel like I'm in such a weird place right now. On the one hand, I am hopeful and excited. I feel good (minus an old back injury that seems to have flared up this morning due to me sneezing.. no joke!), but I have so much underlying anxiety. It's strange not knowing what's going on inside me and I know that miscarriage is still very likely at this point. And I've read about missed miscarriages where women do not even know that the pregnancy is not progressing. Part of me feels like this BFP is too good to be true... my husband says I'm negative, but I think I'm just a realist...

I will feel much better once we go to the doctor, but that's not for over two weeks! In the meantime, all I can do is wait and pray that any major symptoms hold off until the school year ends!?!

Happy MDW everyone!

 

[Gagrlinpitt]

Gagrl: I totally get it... with my cycles as long and unpredictable as they were/are, I thought we'd never get pregnant.... I was feeling frantic and anxious and regretful that I hadn't gone off the pill earlier. Try to keep your head up and you will get your BFP. Think about how incredible it is that your cycle and body regulated so quickly. You have a nice short cycle and you are ovulating! All good things.

And try to resist the urge to test again for a bit... way too early!?

As for me, I am in hibernation mode this weekend catching up on my grad school class and finishing report cards. It's honestly fine by me and I've been sitting out on our patio typing away, catching up on laundry and just relaxing.

I honestly feel like I'm in such a weird place right now. On the one hand, I am hopeful and excited. I feel good (minus an old back injury that seems to have flared up this morning due to me sneezing.. no joke!), but I have so much underlying anxiety. It's strange not knowing what's going on inside me and I know that miscarriage is still very likely at this point. And I've read about missed miscarriages where women do not even know that the pregnancy is not progressing. Part of me feels like this BFP is too good to be true... my husband says I'm negative, but I think I'm just a realist...

I will feel much better once we go to the doctor, but that's not for over two weeks! In the meantime, all I can do is wait and pray that any major symptoms hold off until the school year ends!?!

Happy MDW everyone!

Thanks girl

 

[Angel5000]

Faye - That's great that you are still feeling good, and the anxiety is not uncommon. I have done too much reading myself and have also read about "silent miscarriages" where women miscarry and do not even know, and I'm constantly paranoid this will happen to me. It's not being negative, it's being realistic. It does make me wish I was more "blissfully ignorant" instead though. FX That everything is good for you at your appointment, and that the big symptoms stay away until after teh school year ends. It's really difficult when the MS decides to hit and I'm in the middle of teaching! Consider keeping some peppermints or some hard candy at work just in case something does hit while you are teaching. The difficulty of being a teacher, we can't just "leave the office" to go grab something real quick.

 

[Ajangel25]

Faye- I worried about silent miscarriages in the first trimester and now I am in the 3rd trimester and I'm still paranoid about something happening and having a stillbirth! I think knowing too much and then hearing horror stories definitely doesn't help. And I don't think the worry will ever go away for me; I'll probably just find something new to worry about when he is born! But try to just enjoy your pregnancy because we definitely don't wanna look back and feel like we didn't get to enjoy it because of worrying. And really the odds are in everyone's favor! When is your appt?

 

[Angel5000]

Glad to know its a common fear! What I'm finding is that being part of these boards is a bittersweet thing. The support is amazing but it makes it seem like losses are a much more likely chance than I think they are because the boards are populated by women who have had losses or are high risk or require extra help getting pregnant. Not the case for everyone but it certainly isn't representative of the general population. My sister told me to quit reading lol. I can't do that but I'm staying away from most 1st tri forum except the one thread I'm in for Jan babies! Too many scary things in there!

 

[Flueky88]

Gag, don't give up 7dpo is waaay too early. I know it's hard. I would suggest waiting to test until 12 or 13dpo if not until you are late. I find those BFNS can be terrible on the mind.

Angel congrats on finishing things up

Faye good luck at your appt

AJANGEL, congrats on 28 weeks. Wow your baby will be here in a couple months

I'm just enjoying things. My outlook is waaay better. Not much going on here. I had EWCM today, I couldn't help but notice it. I'm not going to abstain from sex, so who knows. I'm happy either way this cycle

 

[Gagrlinpitt]

Gag, don't give up 7dpo is waaay too early. I know it's hard. I would suggest waiting to test until 12 or 13dpo if not until you are late. I find those BFNS can be terrible on the mind.

Angel congrats on finishing things up

Faye good luck at your appt

AJANGEL, congrats on 28 weeks. Wow your baby will be here in a couple months

I'm just enjoying things. My outlook is waaay better. Not much going on here. I had EWCM today, I couldn't help but notice it. I'm not going to abstain from sex, so who knows. I'm happy either way this cycle

Confession time.. I've been secretly testing everyday since then.. Still stark bfn. Next month if I'm not preggers I'm taking a full month off of charting and everything. Its to stressful right now and makes me bitter and I don't want to be that way..