Things I cannot say out loud....

[Emmy1987]

To my cousin - don't you DARE bitch about how we do things. We did not 'mess about' with our house move, we were sensible - we moved somewhere totally new so we came down to explore the different areas and got lists of places to let in each town, we booked viewings, came down to view the houses, chose one and applied for it, got it and came down once before the move to clean the house and get it ready then we booked removals and moved... HOW is that messing around??! We have a baby to think of!

YOU on the other hand... you and your vile girlfriend went to view a flat in a different city, put a deposit down and aimed to move last Thursday... but... oh yeah! You had no way to move your stuff, no money to move your stuff and your mother offered you some money to help and you moaned it wasn't enough?!!!!! She's letting you borrow her car even though you wrote off her last one! Fuck you!

I really hope you fail in your new place, neither of you have jobs down there, you're over your overdraft and all you have is a bed for your new flat. It's about time your mother stopped mollycoddling you, you're 23 and think you're proper hard and moving out is really easy... let's see shall we?!

Good luck with moving, and stop bitching about me, if you have something to say say it to my face you fat twat!

To my aunt - ^^He bitches about me to you, you 'consider me as a daughter' yet you don't put him straight and you talk to me about him as if the sun shines out of his arse?!! Piss off!
Stop being mean about my grandparents. At least they love me and will do anything for me.

 

[Kalah]

to oh -
stop narrarating everything i do! Yes, i made a devils food cake, covered it in chocolate icing, then ate all of it (except the one slice you had) in 2 days!! Do you think i feel good about doing that? Do you think i wanted to eat the whole thing? No!! I didn't. So please shut up about it, i feel bad enough. You're fatter than me and eat more junk food anyway so stop bugging me about what i eat. You have no idea how much i wish i could just stop eating altogether and starve, but then i wouldn't have the energy to take care of our daughter. It's not like i'm huge, my bmi is 21 ffs so leave me alone!

And stop doing that stupid sigh every time you see me looking at things to buy online. Do i ever actually buy the things without talking to you first, no!! I just like to browse, it's relaxing and i enjoy it so leave me to it! You act like i'm spending a bunch of money even though i haven't bought anything! Oh and don't forget i'm being given $10,000 which i'm going to spend on things for our house. If i want to buy us a new mattress to replace the old one that you've had for god knows how many years, at least 10, i will!! I complain about pain all over my whole body every single day, you complain that i'm always complaining, a new mattress would probably help with all my pain! And no i will not just get a cheap mattress, if i was going to do that i might as well keep the one we have now. And yes i'm going to get us some new softer sheets and fresh pillows, ours are flat and they just suck.
It's not like i'm going to waste this money on junk, i'm going to buy things we need. A dyson, a steam generator iron, new ironing board, mattress, storage boxes, some shelves, a new kitchen bin, some new cleaning supplies, a bread maker, a blender, and some things to help me get in shape! Oh and yes i am going to get clip in hair extensions, i've just cut all my hair off, it's like 6 inches long, get over it! Oh yeah and i'm getting us a new couch, this one that came with our house is just terrible and i'm sick of having to keep it covered in sheets and it's falling apart! Oh and yeah i'm going to get a few new clothes. In case you've forgotten, i don't have many clothes right now. I have 2 nice outfits, two. It's not like i'm going and tossing all the money away, we need things! What i don't use will go into a savings for when we need things again.
Now stop telling me what i'm doing, i already know, i'm the one doing it!!


And one more thing, you're annoying go away.
stop reading things out to me that i don't care about then get annoyed that i'm not listening. I don't need to hear the names of 50 different porn movies that you think have funny names, i don't care and i'm trying to focus on something else. And don't get annoyed when i get frustrated with you and tell you i don't care! I ask you nicely a few times but you don't listen, you only listen when i'm mean about it!

this!

Oh it's the worst isn't it?! He'll sit there at the computer while I'm trying to read something and he keeps laughing and reading out the names like "omg....omg..hahhaha...omg you have to hear this one! Do you want to hear it? (no) Big Blowout 46!" Over and over and over he does this, with sports and news too, why doesn't he understand I just don't care at all!

 

[tanya]

Basically to the whole world, I'm exhausted I'm feeling very down at the moment and I'm quite certain I'm going to ruin my baby's life like my mum did mine, I am trying my very best to be a perfect wife and mother and I have to prove to everyone I can do this right and that I can cope so stoptrying to look after my baby, I do need a rest and I do need a nap but I'm just not happy to leave my baby it doesn't mean I don't trust you to look after him and mil, just because you struggled to change his nappy does not mean I will never let you look after him! It was the first disposable nappy you did!!
Stop tying to help me I need to prove I can do it alone! Sil needs to stop sneaking in and doing all my housework, I can manage (we live together and I can't nap without waking up to find out my washing has been done or something. She's bloody doing it now!!)
That all sounds very stupid and ungrateful I know...
To Flynn, ok gorgeous boy you used to sleep in till 9 everyday why do you suddenly insist on getting up at 6? And why do you totally refuse to go in your Moses basket during the day? You're asleep you won't miss anything! Also it would be nice if you would let daddy soothe you occasionally and not force mummy to cuddle you all the time, I'd lime to pee occasionally!
Also I'm very sorry for leaving you on my bed to cry this morning I really really couldn't cope with the crying anymore and I only hid in the bathroom for ten min, thanks for going to sleep while I was gone too, didnt make the three hours trying to settle you feel like I was totally useless! Also thanks for peeing all over my bed, it's amazing how you can totally miss the changing mat!

 

[MamaBelle]

[Removed]

 

[Ozzieshunni]

Dear Mam & Dad,

Thanks for disowning me when I was 18 years old and in a relationship with Sunny (DH) because he is Indian and you are BNP nutcase racists. It was the first useful thing you did for me in my life, because now my children don't know who you are, what you look like or have anything to do with you whatsoever. I am so grateful for that, because now they're nowhere near your hate and never will be. They're not missing out, either; they have wonderful grandparents in Sunny's parents. So thanks to you both, I really do mean that. By the way, the letter calling my gorgeous children "mongrels" was much appreciated.

Racist twats. (Is swearing allowed? Sorry!)

Thanks, that was therapeutic. I haven't seen my parents for about 20 years so I haven't been able to say any of that to their faces!

Your kids are better off not knowing them

 

[MissFox]

Dear Mam & Dad,

Thanks for disowning me when I was 18 years old and in a relationship with Sunny (DH) because he is Indian and you are BNP nutcase racists. It was the first useful thing you did for me in my life, because now my children don't know who you are, what you look like or have anything to do with you whatsoever. I am so grateful for that, because now they're nowhere near your hate and never will be. They're not missing out, either; they have wonderful grandparents in Sunny's parents. So thanks to you both, I really do mean that. By the way, the letter calling my gorgeous children "mongrels" was much appreciated.

Racist twats. (Is swearing allowed? Sorry!)

Thanks, that was therapeutic. I haven't seen my parents for about 20 years so I haven't been able to say any of that to their faces!

Your kids are better off not knowing them

I agree.

 

[MamaBelle]

[Removed]

 

[Kalah]

Dear Mam & Dad,

Thanks for disowning me when I was 18 years old and in a relationship with Sunny (DH) because he is Indian and you are BNP nutcase racists. It was the first useful thing you did for me in my life, because now my children don't know who you are, what you look like or have anything to do with you whatsoever. I am so grateful for that, because now they're nowhere near your hate and never will be. They're not missing out, either; they have wonderful grandparents in Sunny's parents. So thanks to you both, I really do mean that. By the way, the letter calling my gorgeous children "mongrels" was much appreciated.

Racist twats. (Is swearing allowed? Sorry!)

Thanks, that was therapeutic. I haven't seen my parents for about 20 years so I haven't been able to say any of that to their faces!

Your kids are better off not knowing them

I agree.

Me too.

 

[Babushka99]

I also agree, that is really awful.

 

[vitriolic_vix]

To my mum - I love you i really do and appreciate everything you do for us but stop rabbiting on about my decision to exclusively express even though i 'had formula and was fine' does not mean thats whats right for me. I know you didn't understand my decision to breastfeed because you couldn't do it but I really wanted to. I know I have had mastitis 5 times but that does not mean ' its time to stop being silly and stop'. I will stop... when i'm ready.

Yes I will probably wait until little one is 6 months to the day to start weaning just because it will annoy the hell out of you...i know 28 years ago advice was different but this is now.. and i don't think shes ready anyway! She is teething and dropping bottles right left and centre so why would i introduce food when she needs milk more???

Yes HV and NHS advice has changed a lot since I was born but that does not mean that they don't know what they are talking about and it will all change again tomorrow. Yes some of what they tell me I take with a pinch of salt but things like cot bumpers, if those pose a risk to LO I will not use them as if i kept them on like your bugging me to and something happened I would never forgive myself or you!

I appreciate the toys you buy for little one I really do but why do you only let her play with her favourite things when she comes to visit your house? Why can we not use bring them home?! I thought that was the point.. for her to play with them more than once a week!

Stop calling her 'my baby'... she is mine.. your are her grandma... arrrgghhh this annoys me!

To my MIL - You annoy me but I know deep down your a nice lady but why do you never call your son? EVER? Yes he moved when he married me but he still exists and is hurt that you never call to ask how he is. He tries to call you and we come visit when we can afford it but nothing from you? In the 5 years we have been married you have visited us twice... you don't work and its 2 hours drive... would once every 6 months kill you?? I thought you might be different with LO here but unless i send you her picture your not bothered.

To my brother - i know your on a health kick and look great and go to the gym every day to burn a billion calories and i know i need to shift the 17lb baby weight i'm carrying which makes me depressed. Yes I joined a gym and its expensive but i honestly never have the time to go.. i hvae a 5 month old who on a good day goes to bed at 8 (if i'm very lucky without another 20 trips up the stairs to settle her). I am exhausted.. i have ME and the last thing I feel like it then going to the gym. Yes my husband could help more but he doesn't... i feel bad enough that i can't get into my jeans after five months.. your not helping my issues with food. I think i've done well not to slip into my old bulimia habits to drop my weight and am really trying to concentrate on that and my daughter rather than how hideous i look atm.

To the girl across the road who had a baby the week before me - damn you and your skinny jeans and perfect hair every time i go outside to get something.... why do you have to look so good when i'm in trackie bottoms covered in sick, my hair scraped back and my nursing vest squiff?!

there are many more but i'll leave it at that for now..!!!

 

[MissFox]

DH: Did you seriously just call me at work to ask if MAYBE the Tylenol had fallen out of the diaper bag (because you couldn't find it there) onto the floor??? Have you tried looking?! Oh, you just did- did you? And was it there? Oh it was?! WOW!

 

[Odd Socks]

OH - honestly, I'm thrilled that you got to watch loads of west wing today when bella was napping. Do you not think that some of your time could have gone to better use doing a bit of housework? Did you not see the 3 clothes maidens of dry clothes hanging up in the kitchen that could have been put away? Would it have killed you to take bella's toys out of the bath? You tell me I nag, but if I don't ask you to do things specifically, this is what happens.

I really can't wait for you to get back to work. Having you off & having to look after you is far harder work than when you're home, because you make so much mess & don't do such a great job of clearing up after yourself.

& if you complain again about how tired you are, I'm battering you round the face with a dead fish. You've had 2 1/2 weeks off work, bella's been at the CM 3 days a week when you've been home, you've done nothing but sleep & watch TV on those days. Try being 5 months pregnant, getting up in the night with a poorly one year old, watching her all day when I'm not at work & then working 34 hour weeks.

 

[Ozzieshunni]

Dear dh's friends new ex: secretly I'm happy you and dh's friend broke up. He's better off and I hope he gets custody of the kids.

 

[elephant29]

OH - honestly, I'm thrilled that you got to watch loads of west wing today when bella was napping. Do you not think that some of your time could have gone to better use doing a bit of housework? Did you not see the 3 clothes maidens of dry clothes hanging up in the kitchen that could have been put away? Would it have killed you to take bella's toys out of the bath? You tell me I nag, but if I don't ask you to do things specifically, this is what happens.

I really can't wait for you to get back to work. Having you off & having to look after you is far harder work than when you're home, because you make so much mess & don't do such a great job of clearing up after yourself.

& if you complain again about how tired you are, I'm battering you round the face with a dead fish. You've had 2 1/2 weeks off work, bella's been at the CM 3 days a week when you've been home, you've done nothing but sleep & watch TV on those days. Try being 5 months pregnant, getting up in the night with a poorly one year old, watching her all day when I'm not at work & then working 34 hour weeks.

This exactly!!

I came home from work the other day and I just burst out laughing It was one of those angry hysterical laughs though and OH looked a bit scared I walked in the living room and picked up 3 mugs, all within reaching distance of a cruising baby. I couldnt believe it as one of them was mine from the morning that I asked him to move, this was 6pm!

I'd asked him to put on a washing and hang it up as I'd spent the previous day doing 3 loads (it's all built up with us both working full time) and there was only 1 left to do. I came in and it was sitting in the machine washed. I asked why he hadnt dried it and his reply was 'the clothes horse is full' Really? We have a cupboard full of the things, use another one!!! He changed the bed (after me calling from work to remind him) but didnt bother changing the pillow cases cause 'i hate doing that'?!? Argh!!

I'm 15 weeks pregnant, sooo tired and am just beginning to get over hypermesis and working 40 hours a week with a 30 min travel each way. Yeah he's working I get that but we both have to do equal shares of the housework otherwise it isnt fair!

Also yesterday he went into work after being at his SIL 40th party and not getting to bed till around 2am. He worked till 5pm and wen he came home I swear for about 30 mins constant all I heard was 'God i'm sooo tired, I'm spent, dont know what's wrong I just feel shattered' I nodded and sympathised at first but eventually just said 'Your bloody hungover! Get a grip!'

MIL;

I know your a proud granny, I really do and it's lovely. However on Friday night a girl came up and asked if I was LO's mum and saying how lovely she was and you actually interrupted the conversation with 'I'm LO's granny' then started chatting to the girl, completely ignoring me! Er helloo I'm her mum and was proud to be talking about her as well!

Mum;

I appreciate everything you do for me/us, I really really do. BUT...you need to calm down with the worrying about LO. It's not normal. LO had a little reaction to something whilst with my mum. It wasnt serious but my mum started crying and over reacting. I know you mean well but this cant carry on. LO needs to know that she can be adventurous without you saying 'mind your head, oh she's going to hurt herself etc etc'. yeah we wil have bumps and brusises but we'll deal with them, we have to let her explore and learn!

xxx

 

[Lil coldtoes]

Mom AND dad: No, I'm not taking a desk jockey job in the Air Force and no, I'm not going to send my daughter out to either one of you during deployments. She's Dan's daughter also and there's no way in hell I would do that to him. Stop asking.

Dan: Stop hanging out with your family and friends. They drink, do weed, and forget they're approaching 30 not 15. You turn into an immature twit around them.

 

[Lettuce]

The pillowcases are the easiest bit!!!? Weird.

DH, do some housework you lazy lazy lazy slob!
oh and another thing... Lose the weight, I used to be so so proud of my very handsome husband, but frankly, you've let yourself go. That was meant to be my privilege! You've put on 3 stone, youve lost interest in grooming and tbh, you can't afford to put that weight on as you have no chin, now you just have a double chin.
I know you're tired, but I can't help that! I take on all the care of j in the mornings and let you sleep. You never need to get up wit her during the night, Im breastfeeding so you never have to feed her! I take her out all day to let you get on with work so it means I'm out walking all day with no naps. Give me a break.
I would never say out loud that I don't find you as attractive anymore, but I don't. that makes e mean doesn't it?

Oh yeah, and the excess flab makes you snore. It's sooooo annoying! xx

 

[Ozzieshunni]

Lettuce, that's marriage for ya! Eventually, you just let yourself go because you're so used to the other person. DH just got a haircut after 3 months, lol, and he had to decide it for himself. I will say that he does do housework and I kinda love it when he has insomnia because I wake up to a clean kitchen

 

[clarsair]

DH: We both work full time and I'm always the one that does everything for LO in the mornings, so make your own bloody packed lunch!

 

[Lettuce]

I know, I feel terrible for saying it tho! I mean, I've prob not bothered as much, but legs are usually done, etc. I think it's cos yesterday I finally felt good and I want him to feel good too! Plus people look at mums as well as the babies... Gotta look smart!
Still, I was meant to go out with my mum n dad today, was put with my mum yesterday, and he's n decided to come! And we'll meet my parents there. It does mean a major faff til he's ready, but still, it's a start.... I hope he puts on something decent, I'm wearing something smart, it's my SIL party this afternoon too! xx

 

[Lettuce]

DH: We both work full time and I'm always the one that does everything for LO in the mornings, so make your own bloody packed lunch!

you tell him girl! He should be making yours! X