This is going to be very controversial, but...

[NuKe]

...do you think there is actually such a thing as "accidentally" getting pregnant? I mean, we all know HOW to get pregnant, so when I hear someone saying it was "an accident" etc, I don't get it, as there is NO method of contraception that is 100%. So logically, if you are having sex, there is ALWAYS a chance you could get pregnant. If you really don't want to get pregnant, don't have sex.

Thoughts?

N.B. I do realise this topic may get a little heated, let's try and be respectful, eh?

 

[jamielou]

Yeah i defintely think there is accidently getting pregnant obviously everyone knows there isn't any contraception that is 100% but i think you all take that chance like i wont be that 4% etc but then you know logically that is a small percentage and a lot of people will take that risk. I think the only way it isn't "accidental" is when the woman purposly says she is on the pill, has the coil etc misleading the man to do his thing up her reguarly and her eventually falling pregnant, barely in mind woman aren't fertile 24/7 either... but i do see where you are coming from, hence, looking back i was really a silly girl for having sex so young as a teenager as condoms are only 96% effective and i could of been a 14 year old mummy!! scary!

 

[AP]

NuKe, I agree. Theres always a chance, alllllways

 

[freckleonear]

I agree and disagree. Yes, everyone should be aware that there is always a chance of getting pregnant if you have sex. If you're not ready to face the consequences, don't have sex! I wish that teenagers were told that instead of how great sex is if you use protection. But if your contraception does fail then you didn't make that baby on purpose, so it could be seen as an accident from that point of view. Maybe "unplanned" is a better word for that situation.

 

[redpoppy]

No because to expect people to refrain form sex is ridiculous. It's like when the doctor gives you some medicine for your toe or something else random and you read the pamphlet and it says amongst other scary side effects "may cause blindness".

If you use a condom properly and it doesn't burst then it's very unlikely to case pregnancy and I'd dare to suggest its a lot more unlikey than they claim with those two factors taken into consideration.

Also, my cousin was told she was infertile, managed to conceive after IVF, had twins and all her life since she was in her early 20s to mid 30s she NEVER needed contraception. She was told she would not be able to conceive after the IVF twins. then 6 years later after some hippy treatments miracle baby number 1 arrived. EEP! She was happy but thought, oh it's just a miracle baby and so continues to NOT use contraception (plus she was BFing) and 5 months later... OOPS! Miracle baby no. 2. Admittedly she shoudl have known after the first miracle but she just didn't think she could go from being the least fertile woman to the most in such a small amount of time. SO instead of 2 kids she now has 4!

 

[NuKe]

that reminds me of a friend of mine... she never ever got a period, was always told she'd never have kids, so never used contraception with her bf, was doing coke, speed etc, drinking every weekend, then found out she was 6 months gone!! thankfully the baby was 100% healthy. she now has 2 kids.

 

[kiwimama]

Yes, the only way to prevent pregnancy is to not have sex, but it is natural for people to have the urge to have sex. It's as pointless as saying that people in 3rd world countries should just not have sex because it's unfair for them to bring children into the world when they are so poor. (My OH said this to me one day and I said, they have just as much of a sex drive as anyone in the western world, and he finally understood.)
This is why it's so important to teach teenagers, well everyone really, the importance of using protection, they are going to do it anyway, and it's better they do it with protection than without.
The main drive an animal (which humans are) has while living, is to reproduce, which is why animals have such a strong drive to have sex, so that their genes are passed on. Now, of course, because humans are so evolved and have such reasoning, we don't only have the drive to reproduce, we also have drives to have a successful career and whatever else. But we are still animals and underneath it all, we have a drive to reproduce, which means having sex, but because not all humans want to have babies at any given time, we need to use contraception, and thank goodness we have it, because things would be very chaotic without it.

 

[Dragonfly]

I would say accidently would be failed contraceptive of some form so yeah it can happen. I woudlnt say my son was planned or this one but it wasnt prevented we knew what we where doing.

 

[BlackBerry25]

I would say accidently would be failed contraceptive of some form so yeah it can happen. I woudlnt say my son was planned or this one but it wasnt prevented we knew what we where doing.

Same.

It happened to my mom and my stepsister. Also my dad had a vasectomy and my sister was later conceived so yes it can accidentally happen!

 

[PeanutBean]

Yes definitely it's possible. A close friend of mine had the condom come off (young partner who didn't get it on quite right), took the morning after pill right away but it failed. We put a reliance on contraception but ALL of them can fail even when used properly.

 

[Miss Wright]

My son was unplanned, wouldn't call him an accident though. I agree that it's unrealistic to expect people to abstain from sex unless they are planning for a baby x

 

[debbie7155]

I gave up after trying for 18yrs of only ever having 1 ectopic back then, both had tests done to which were very good, but seriously 18yrs & nothing?
until
i moved to australia with a new man & got pregnant like 2 days of being in the country, so i think yes you can get pregnant accidently & no you cant? lol

 

[Laura2919]

For me it wasnt a case of not wanting to get pregnant, I knew someday I wanted children I just didnt expect it to happen when it did. I was on the pill and I obviously took the precautions and I suppose its the same thing really, like they say it was only one you just expect that your not going to be that 1%. I fell pregnant and I am happy I had my girls.

 

[Dopeyjopey]

I think 'by accident' is a bad way to put it. I think it is more of a surprise, which is what i called my pregnancy.

 

[PeanutBean]

I think it depends on your definition of accident. I mean we say car accidents but there aren't any that aren't the fault of someone driving badly/too fast/inappropriately/stepping into the road/etc. The health and safety school of thought is there is no such thing as accident, just not taking enough care.

 

[Dopeyjopey]

I think it depends on your definition of accident. I mean we say car accidents but there aren't any that aren't the fault of someone driving badly/too fast/inappropriately/stepping into the road/etc. The health and safety school of thought is there is no such thing as accident, just not taking enough care.

That's a very good way to put it. The police call them road traffic incidents now as 'accident' suggests there was no one at fault.

 

[PeanutBean]

I think in general usage people say accident to mean something that wasn't intended. Be it messing up contraception or bumping into someone. By any other definition there is no meaning to the word as everything that happens is the fault of something.

 

[Natasha2605]

I would never describe Summer as an accident. It's a horrible term IMO. I'd say unplanned or surprise, In my case we stopped using condoms before my pill had kicked in properly. My mistake but certainly no ''accident'' xx

 

[Dragonfly]

yeah accidenbt wouldnt be the right term, I would say unplanned would be better, unplanned and a nice surprise.

I hate when I switch past the maury show and theres a girl sitting there in tears with sad piano music playing looking for the babies dad 17 months later and testing 17 men when she admits she used no protection and had 17 men around that time! WTF? thats more than some of us have ever had in a life time of sexual partners. Would she not get nervous after nummer 1 with no protection and in deed in a tizzy with number 2 with no protection in case she ended up preg? weird behavior. I can only think it was some sort of unprotected sex orgy.

 

[JASMAK]

My sister got pregnant on the pill. She took it religiously. The doctor failed to mention that when she was on her antibiotics and had severe diarrhea from those antiobiotics, that the birth control would not work. She even went to the doctor the month before because she had some 'break through' bleeding on the pill...and that doctor told her she was fine. That was an 'accident' meaning, not on purpose.

I had a co-worker who got pregnant with an IUD in. Her husband also had a vasectomy a couple months before. I am pretty sure that would be classed as an accident as well.

Anyways...does it really matter if it is an 'accident'? A baby is a baby...and a blessing. It's just whether or not you accept the blessing, or ignore the gift from God.