TTC 1st child 35+ (Please spoiler any PG news/announcements).

[HappyAuntie]

Well done on the letter, Dwrgi! Good for you for writing. It isn't an easy thing to do, and I'm proud of you for speaking up on behalf of infertiles everywhere.

 

[purplelou]

manuiti - that sounds like a really long way to get testing done! do you have to travel that far to see your FS? good news though that you can use DG's frozen swimmners

HA - did you manage to get some sleep last pm? I am hoping those embies (ve been reading and I think they may be called cleavage stage or blastocysts??) are getting big and juicy for you!

 

[Pennyb]

Hi lovely ladies, here's our latest list!

A few people are missing though: Never, Luv, FM, Asry, PennyB, Heavenly, NS, Dr Squid, and loads of others. Please post your details so that I can add them here, and we all know where we're at.

Dwrgi great complaint to Boden good for you.

Here are my details

Me 38 DH 46 TTC 1st baby natural, had 2 MC and 1 MMC

 

[purplelou]

big and loves to everyone I haven't mentioned xxxx


AFM - 4 DPO and waiting patiently ( ) I think the weekend will be resty on saturday, household chores, laundry etc and then lunch and some shopping on sunday, it's dad's birthday on Monday so we will treat them to some nice food, and we have presents and big fat gooey chocolate cake to take round, and we are going to go find him so earphones so he can watch a dvd on his little portable player (becuse he starts chemo soon) all in all - quite a relaxing time and hopefully I won't be thinking about the tww!

anyone have any other nice plans for the weekend?? (I'm Liking Asry's candy bag!!)

 

[HappyAuntie]

HA - did you manage to get some sleep last pm? I am hoping those embies (ve been reading and I think they may be called cleavage stage or blastocysts??) are getting big and juicy for you!

Aw, thanks! I actually slept pretty well last night, aside from some strange dreams.... I woke up around 6a because when my bladder gets even the slightest bit full it puts pressure on the bloated ovaries, so that's woken me up the last two mornings. Then once I'm up I can't go back to sleep again. But I'm feeling better today - just taking acetaminophen (tylenol) today instead of the vicodin, and it seems to be doing a decent job of pain mgmt.

I know on Day 5 they're blastocysts - that's why Day 5 transfers are also called blast or blasties. I wish I could get a daily update from the lab, but they said they want to disturb the atmosphere in the incubator as little as possible, so they check them as little as possible. I'm hoping I'll have two left come Monday... I'm just really anxious that none of them will make it....

 

[manuiti]

manuiti - that sounds like a really long way to get testing done! do you have to travel that far to see your FS? good news though that you can use DG's frozen swimmners

Yeah, it is a long way and yes, that's the same trip I have to do to go and see the FS. So it's going to be interesting... But he's known to be the best in the country, plus there's no one who even does this sort of thing in the town where I live.

I'm hoping I'll have two left come Monday... I'm just really anxious that none of them will make it....

I've got everything crossed for you hun!!!! And I hope you feel more comfortable soon.

 

[dashka]

Dwrgi! Congrats! You are going to follow in Vicky's footsteps and get a BFP too! Just my prediction.

Dashka, we ladies are so lucky to have a resident holistic nutrionist, especially those of us who are taking the natural route or want to increase our odds with ART. So glad you joined us!

For those of you curious about pH levels and CM here is some info I got from a company called Essense of Life:
Core diet should be fresh, organic veggies, raw when possible (easy to accomplish by making smoothies)
Add fruits, beans, nuts, lean meats and fish, non-gluten grains
Supplement vitamins and minerals, digestive enzymes, omega 3
Limit or avoid dairy products, wheat and glutenous grains, coffee and caffenated tea, alcohol, polysaturated oils, tyramine
Totally avoid refined sugars, artificial sweeteners, processed and fast foods, partially hydrogenated fats, msg, pork, and interesting enough SOY (I think mostly unfermented soy)

Thanks Missy - Good info! yeah I agree with all of that -except I recently learned from ND if you have a weak spleen that raw foods are actually not great... According to TCM if you have a weak spleen which I do -I'm supposed to cook all my foods... I still eat salads and fruit but not as much raw veggies as I'd like...and definitely nothing cold/frozen...(that's why I don't put frozen berries into my smoothies anymore).

 

[dashka]

I've just realised this thread was started on my birthday last year. My goal is to be pregnant by my 40th Birthday in June so I am taking it as a sign!

Isnt' that funny - it's also my goal to get pregnant by my 40th b-day in May!! Good luck !!!

 

[dashka]

Hi Ladies!
Sorry to hear Lilsluz - that AF arrived.... (I should have read all the posts before I replied earlier).... So hard to catch up if you've missed 24 hrs. on this thread!
Take it easy!! On to next month!

Purple - have a wonderful weekend - sounds lovely...

Dwrgi - thanks for taking over the thread!! and for your letter to the company.... I feel like that a lot sometimes... Although I am trying to change my thoughts - as I'm reading more and more about the laws of attraction/universe - that say we should feel good and feel as if we have what we want right now instead of the negative feelings that push what we want away.. So it's better to feel the happy/positive feelings of having what you want now. Does that make any sense? For example - close your eyes and imagine yourself pregnant or holding your baby and feel the happiness and gratitude for that baby... This is the feeling that will attract a baby into our lives. I know it's easier said than done and I'm still working on it - trust me!! xoxo

AFM - I'm 1 DPO today (I think - cause the ov strip had a surge 2 days ago) Went to acupuncture last night and I'm starting a spleen tonic to strengthen my spleen. Also adding in CoQ10 to my supplements... Trying to do more yoga and listen to motivational speakers in the car... I know I sound really wacko.... don't I ?)

Hope you ladies all have a wonderful weekend!!!

 

[manuiti]

This CoQ10 business sounds interesting and makes sense to me. Think I'll have a job finding it out here though. yet again! lol

 

[manuiti]

Just had to share that I've changed my mood on here to excited because....

Hubby comes home next week!!!!! He's been away for 10 weeks so far this time. I cannot wait!!!

I've now go to the stage of not being able to concentrate on much anymore. lol

 

[drsquid]

my update.. dont remember what cycle day without doing the math but i am 2dpiui. doing iui with donor sperm and used femara (letrozole) this month..

so super auspicious day at work today. reading lots of ob ultrasounds, with lots of scary er visit early first trimester.. all happy, healthy, LIVING little babies. including one that was supposed to be a missed abortion that was normal. there are some days where it is sad scan one after another.. oh and performed my first hsg today.

 

[HappyAuntie]

Dwrgi - thanks for taking over the thread!! and for your letter to the company.... I feel like that a lot sometimes... Although I am trying to change my thoughts - as I'm reading more and more about the laws of attraction/universe - that say we should feel good and feel as if we have what we want right now instead of the negative feelings that push what we want away.. So it's better to feel the happy/positive feelings of having what you want now. Does that make any sense? For example - close your eyes and imagine yourself pregnant or holding your baby and feel the happiness and gratitude for that baby... This is the feeling that will attract a baby into our lives. I know it's easier said than done and I'm still working on it - trust me!! xoxo

I respectfully disagree. I apologize if my tone comes off as combative here, that is not my intention... comments like these make me feel defensive and that makes it hard to state clearly what it is I'm trying to say.

Here are my thoughts on the matter:
Positive thinking is fine to a point, but it cannot trump physical reality, visualization cannot rearrange chromosomes. My 2nd baby died because it had 3 copies of the 13th chromosome, not because I didn't want it badly enough or didn't imagine holding it in my arms. I imagine what it would be like to hold my babies every.single.day.

The problem I see with "the power of positive thinking" is that it leaves you taking on too much responsibility for things that are out of your control, feeling guilty when things don't turn out the way you wanted, thinking it didn't happen this month because you didn't want it badly enough, or because you had doubts during the tww.

Having negative thoughts now and then is a completely normal part of the human condition. Believing otherwise sets you up for failure - it is a standard of perfection that cannot be attained. Acknowledging that one has negative thoughts or feelings neither causes bad things to happen nor prevents good things from happening. Acknowledging negative thoughts can actually make them go away faster.

There's a blog written by a therapist in Chicago who specializes in counseling infertile couples. She has also suffered from infertility herself, going through multiple failed IVFs before adopting her daughter. She has a post that explains this much better than I can: https://theinfertilitytherapist.blogspot.com/2010/09/negatives-of-positive-thinking-denial.html

Just my two cents' worth.

 

[HappyAuntie]

Manuiti, enjoy the homecoming!!! What does your husband do that he's away for such long stretches? When I was a kid, one of my friends' dads worked on an offshore oil rig and was away for 6 weeks at a time, then home for 6 weeks... I always imagine your husband doing something similar.

Drsquid, it must feel great to have those happy days at work. How did the HSG go? Did the woman complain of any pain? Mine was really a breeze compared to some of the stories I've heard on here....

 

[manuiti]

Manuiti, enjoy the homecoming!!! What does your husband do that he's away for such long stretches? When I was a kid, one of my friends' dads worked on an offshore oil rig and was away for 6 weeks at a time, then home for 6 weeks... I always imagine your husband doing something similar.

You're not too far off in a way. He provides private security in hostile environments. So if the oil rig was land based and in Iraq for example, he'd make sure the guys working on the rig out there were safe from being attacked. He's meant to be away for 9 weeks and home for 3 weeks at a time but I don't think it's ever worked out like that. So I do seem to spend more time doing this than doing this . lol

 

[Asryellah]

Asry-what's the temperature with you now? Hopefully a bit warmer than -22!! I hope you get your BFP this month too!!

Good morning girls Temp is this morning -18c but as I´m listening to Smooth FM 100,4 from UK they are saying it's -15 also somewhere in your big island anyhow it should warm up to somewhere -5 - 9 today so great!! Our pup gets to go for a long walk

My line would be something like this:

Asryellah 35 oh 29, ttc 09/2010, unexplained, going towards IUI

Hope you all have a great weekend!!!

 

[Dwrgi]

New List!

Asryellah: 35, OH 29, ttc 09/2010, unexplained, going towards IUI

Butterfly: natural BFP at age 44 after 10 months trying with ex.

Dashka: natural TTC after failed Clomid and IUI.

Dr. Squid: IUI with donor sperm.

Dwrgi: ICSI 2, EC week beginning March 12

HA: IVF EC February 8th, ET Feb 13th?

iPenn44: 37, DH 37, TTC 1.5 years, DH sperm issues, using IUI with donor sperm

Lady H: natural TTC.

LilSluz: natural TTC after 2 MC's and Clomid.

Manuiti: natural TTC, doing tests, high FSH, waiting to see FS

MissyT: natural TTC after failed IVF

PennyB: 38, DH 46, natural TTC, had 2 MC and 1 MMC

Purple: natural TTC

Twinkle: seeing FS, waiting for test results, losing weight for ICSI.

 

[Dwrgi]

Dwrgi - thanks for taking over the thread!! and for your letter to the company.... I feel like that a lot sometimes... Although I am trying to change my thoughts - as I'm reading more and more about the laws of attraction/universe - that say we should feel good and feel as if we have what we want right now instead of the negative feelings that push what we want away.. So it's better to feel the happy/positive feelings of having what you want now. Does that make any sense? For example - close your eyes and imagine yourself pregnant or holding your baby and feel the happiness and gratitude for that baby... This is the feeling that will attract a baby into our lives. I know it's easier said than done and I'm still working on it - trust me!! xoxo

I respectfully disagree. I apologize if my tone comes off as combative here, that is not my intention... comments like these make me feel defensive and that makes it hard to state clearly what it is I'm trying to say.

Here are my thoughts on the matter:
Positive thinking is fine to a point, but it cannot trump physical reality, visualization cannot rearrange chromosomes. My 2nd baby died because it had 3 copies of the 13th chromosome, not because I didn't want it badly enough or didn't imagine holding it in my arms. I imagine what it would be like to hold my babies every.single.day.

The problem I see with "the power of positive thinking" is that it leaves you taking on too much responsibility for things that are out of your control, feeling guilty when things don't turn out the way you wanted, thinking it didn't happen this month because you didn't want it badly enough, or because you had doubts during the tww.

Having negative thoughts now and then is a completely normal part of the human condition. Believing otherwise sets you up for failure - it is a standard of perfection that cannot be attained. Acknowledging that one has negative thoughts or feelings neither causes bad things to happen nor prevents good things from happening. Acknowledging negative thoughts can actually make them go away faster.

There's a blog written by a therapist in Chicago who specializes in counseling infertile couples. She has also suffered from infertility herself, going through multiple failed IVFs before adopting her daughter. She has a post that explains this much better than I can: https://theinfertilitytherapist.blogspot.com/2010/09/negatives-of-positive-thinking-denial.html

Just my two cents' worth.

Thank you, HA, and I agree. I also visualise holding my baby, and have visualised 'egg travelling from the ovary, to meet the sperm, and then embedding.' In five years of TTC I have done EVERYTHING. Now, I am doing assisted conception WITH acupuncture and a ton load of vits. I literally rattle, oh, and I'm very spotty too! So, I think it's having a balance all told!

However, Dashka, I do agree that positive thinking is a good goal to have-it's just remembering to think positively when you've had 5 years of ovulation baby dancing to get the inevitable AF arrive...

 

[dashka]

Just had to share that I've changed my mood on here to excited because....

Hubby comes home next week!!!!! He's been away for 10 weeks so far this time. I cannot wait!!!

I've now go to the stage of not being able to concentrate on much anymore. lol

that's great news!!!!! Hubby comes home!!! GL to you!! and enjoy!!!

 

[dashka]

Dwrgi - thanks for taking over the thread!! and for your letter to the company.... I feel like that a lot sometimes... Although I am trying to change my thoughts - as I'm reading more and more about the laws of attraction/universe - that say we should feel good and feel as if we have what we want right now instead of the negative feelings that push what we want away.. So it's better to feel the happy/positive feelings of having what you want now. Does that make any sense? For example - close your eyes and imagine yourself pregnant or holding your baby and feel the happiness and gratitude for that baby... This is the feeling that will attract a baby into our lives. I know it's easier said than done and I'm still working on it - trust me!! xoxo

I respectfully disagree. I apologize if my tone comes off as combative here, that is not my intention... comments like these make me feel defensive and that makes it hard to state clearly what it is I'm trying to say.

Here are my thoughts on the matter:
Positive thinking is fine to a point, but it cannot trump physical reality, visualization cannot rearrange chromosomes. My 2nd baby died because it had 3 copies of the 13th chromosome, not because I didn't want it badly enough or didn't imagine holding it in my arms. I imagine what it would be like to hold my babies every.single.day.

The problem I see with "the power of positive thinking" is that it leaves you taking on too much responsibility for things that are out of your control, feeling guilty when things don't turn out the way you wanted, thinking it didn't happen this month because you didn't want it badly enough, or because you had doubts during the tww.

Having negative thoughts now and then is a completely normal part of the human condition. Believing otherwise sets you up for failure - it is a standard of perfection that cannot be attained. Acknowledging that one has negative thoughts or feelings neither causes bad things to happen nor prevents good things from happening. Acknowledging negative thoughts can actually make them go away faster.

There's a blog written by a therapist in Chicago who specializes in counseling infertile couples. She has also suffered from infertility herself, going through multiple failed IVFs before adopting her daughter. She has a post that explains this much better than I can: https://theinfertilitytherapist.blogspot.com/2010/09/negatives-of-positive-thinking-denial.html

Just my two cents' worth.

Thank you, HA, and I agree. I also visualise holding my baby, and have visualised 'egg travelling from the ovary, to meet the sperm, and then embedding.' In five years of TTC I have done EVERYTHING. Now, I am doing assisted conception WITH acupuncture and a ton load of vits. I literally rattle, oh, and I'm very spotty too! So, I think it's having a balance all told!

However, Dashka, I do agree that positive thinking is a good goal to have-it's just remembering to think positively when you've had 5 years of ovulation baby dancing to get the inevitable AF arrive...

Hi Ladies - Trust me I understand what you are saying... I have been trying and had disapointments over 10 years of trying! I am so sorry for all of our pain and wish to God that none of us had to experience any of this.

I too have visualized and visualized over the years and nothing has happened yet (I even made a vision board which has sat beside my bed for the past 8 years or so)... I think my problem is that my actual feelings don't match my thoughts. For example I could say that I want a baby sooo bad and visualize myself holding it, but maybe if I actually FEEL the feelings of gratitude of having that baby and keep that going and not feel sad, or disapointed every month (I easily get discouraged)... then I think I will attract it more into my life (and not push away by thinking it's never going to happen to me). That is my problem - is the feeling that it's 'never going to happen to me' -enters my head too often.....This is only one school of thought and I'm trying something new ... it's something I'm working on.
Trust me I get down in the dumps a lot - 10 years of disapointments can do a lot to your confidence. I recently read the book "The Power" (by the same woman who did The Secret) and it's all about this kind of thing.

I hope we all are holding our babies soon and none of us have to to look at another woman with a baby with those thoughts... It's natural of course... and still happens to me every day.

Good luck ladies....