TTC After A Loss... Race for the BFP! - 211 BFP's!!!

[Megg33k]

Aww! Thank you! I didn't mean to make you cry! Especially at work! Sorry! LOL

I'm glad its what you needed to hear. Its what I tell myself every friggin' day! Some times I can't look at myself in the mirror without saying (out loud sometimes) those things. I have to remember that the best things are rarely easy. And, I never expected to be where I am right now. I never wanted to do what I'm doing. But, its the means to an end... and that end is all that matters to me anymore. So, whatever it takes is what I'll do! Screw my expectations and limitations and all that stupidity that I placed on myself. My only expectation now is to do whatever I have to in order to become a mother. So, that's that. Doing what I have to do right now! Shots at 7am... Birth control that makes me a monster... Soon I'll doing 3 shots a day. I HATE needles. But, I do it. I never skip a dose. I never even dream of giving up. Whatever you're going through, just keep doing it.

 

[Beanwood]

Hi Megg

I have been reading this post after you posted about it on another thread. Had to comment after your last post).

How beautifully put. What you are saying is right think just need reminding sometimes. Thank you. XX

Hope its ok with you all that I join - am currently wtt after mmc.

 

[grandbleu]

"The best things in life are rarely easy. This is the most important thing you'll ever do. So, just remember that hole in your heart and how desperately you want that baby in your arms... and you'll find a way to keep pushing forward. No matter what path that might lead you down, as I've found out, it will never be as hard as living without the child you desire so much. Every broken heart at a BFN or AF showing... none of it compares to the daily pain of knowing you gave up on your dream of being a mother (or mother again). So, fight through it... Affirm to yourself that you CAN do it. Don't compare and contrast your story with what someone else had to go through or diminish your own suffering because someone else has been through "more" or "worse" than you. You have the right to feel your pain... You have the right to hurt. But, you also have the right to keep pushing to get what you want/need to make your life whole. And, you have the right to be supported through your journey, no matter what. That's why we're here!"

Thank you for your thoughtful words Megg - I just got AF again today and felt profoundly the empty desperation of being a babyless mother and I really needed to hear some words of encouragement from other women on the same hard journey. I am sad and in pain but I will keep persevering for my wee baby that will stay with me forever.

PS. You made me cry too but in a good way.

 

[Megg33k]

I'm just happy I could help you girls! I've had a lot of time to think and had to rearrange my thinking a lot lately. I'm really glad it helped though! I'll always be here to spread hope! I will never get tired of giving hope to others!

 

[ttcstill]

To all my wonderful friends.... the ones I speak to daily and those whom I have yet been granted the pleasure of knowing..... TTC can take so much out of us and unfortunately with the world being the way it is, these lovely little chat threads are our only place of acceptance and understanding. Only those of us who have endured loss, tried and failed, and yet somehow find the strength to push on can help each other to take that next step when it feels impossible.

I have to say this particular cycle has been somewhat of a roller coaster for me..... With the misinterpretaions on my chart to the cramps after AF was gone and now the brightest + opk I have eer seen....... You can barely see the control line on this thing because the test line is so dark!!!

I am hoping beyond hope that somehow this holiday season this thread and site can receive and abundance of blessing and many many BFP's.

I want to thank you all for your support and hope you all know that I am here for you always!

 

[Megg33k]

I'll definitely take an influx of BFP's! We need some more. Its really tapered off lately!

 

[grandbleu]

Trust me - OH and I made a pact to try our little hearts out this month (it's my Bday during O time so perfect!) and we need a little xmas cheer. Good luck to everyone...it'd be nice if we could all roll over to 1st trimester...what a blessing.

 

[Dazed]

Got my Preseed . Felt odd cause I had to ask for it because it was behind the counter.
On a sad note for me, my cousin put up her 19week bump pick on FB. I'm happy for her, but it just puts me back into reality with the loss and TTC again.
So to myself... I say "ONWARD HO! I will prevail!"

 

[Megg33k]

Dazed!

 

[Dazed]

Hehe, my own little peptalk to myself! As long as I don't answer back I think I'm ok

 

[BizyBee]

Just stopping by to tell you all that I'm thinking of you! Sending love and sticky dust your way. Praying for lots of Christmas bfp's!

 

[ttcstill]

Dazed- I know how you feel about two weeks after I got my BFP in may a friend of ours told us she is pregnant..... Now she is big and showing and I have been helping her get ready for her first baby... sometimes just seeing her breaks my heart!

 

[ttcstill]

Well ladies I got my + OPK yesterday and it was the brightest I have ever got.... I am officially heading for my 2ww I am not supposed to test until the 26th and probabyly will not be able to as I received my test package yesterday only to find that instead of HCG tests the sent me LH tests!!! URGHHH!!! On a brighter note they are sending out my tests this morning and told me to keep the O tests.... I hope I never have to use them!

 

[Tigerlilies]

Catching up on yesterday's posts...... to all my BnB girls!

TTCstill, I hope you got your grove on last night and will again tonight!

 

[ttcstill]

Yesterday morning tonight tommorrow night then again on Friday!!!

 

[MissMaternal]

My three have been consequtive just that the first one was with my ex not my current husband.

Oh my gosh that's even worse! (I didn't mean that to sound like it's news to you...sorry, i'm not the best with words) Good luck in the 2ww xx

 

[MissMaternal]

Megg your little pep talk (as you Americans say ) made me cry too!

I know i don't know most of you as well as you all know each other, but personally i think that BizyBee's story (for want of a better word) shows us all what can result of so much waiting and wanting. (i hope no one minds me saying this...)

Everytime i see her ticker i smile.. xx

 

[Dazed]

Thanks ttcstill. Like I said, its not that I'm not happy for her. She had been trying for a year, during which she found out she wasn't ov'ing. The family was actually nervous for her that she couldn't because of all the chemotharapy for her Non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma. I'm glad she was able to reach her goal and that everything is OK with her. I didn't mean to come off as a total *itch if anyone thought that.

 

[dawny690]

to everyone that needs them

Sorry I wasn't around yesterday was working all day today was mental im 7dpo today and this morning I was so tired waking up at work I went back to sleep also I felt like I was going to faint or something until I ate breakfast I have never felt like this before but today I have felt very weak xxxx

 

[Megg33k]

You didn't sound like a bitch, Dazed. You can be happy for someone else and sad for your own situation at the same time. Its hard, but it happens a lot in this TTC lark!

I don't think anyone minds hearing that, Sarah. I know I smile when I see Jen's ticker too!