TTC After Loss Buddy Wanted :-)

[heavyheart]

I got turned down again tonight! I don't know what I can do so DH will be more in the mood. This wouldn't be the first time I've been disappointed with how infrequently we have sex - his desire has always been on the low side. I'm upset now because it comes as a double whammy. Before ttc it wasn't as big a deal - if I'm horny I can take care of myself. I can't make a baby by myself though!! It's both physically and emotionally challenging. Not just the not feeling wanted/desired, but also wondering how much he really wants a kid if he isn't willing to put in the effort.[

Hey aw am sorry to here your dh making you feel like that, its not a nice feeling and when you have the added pressure of ttc it must be so so difficult. My dh had went through a period a couple of years ago when he was down and times were hard that he was just never in the mood so i can relate to the feeling unwanted/ desired feeling but we were not ttc then. Have you spoke to him about it at all??? I know most men can be hard to read with how their feeling, even if he doesnt want to have a big convo about it you need to tell him that you really love him and want to have his child but you cant do it on ur own and he's really hurting your feelings and tell him about feeling not wanted.

I can share that after my mc and me and my dh decided to ttc again he did make a comment in fun but i knew there was meaning in what he said and it was that he hoped that sex would woulnt change, that we would still have fun with it and we wouldnt turn it into a military baby making operation where it all changed cause that would make pressure and pressure isnt a turn on. So maybe your dh is caught in a cycle that he never really had a high drive anyway and is putting pressure on himself, and then he'l c the sadness and pressure on your shoulders which then adds to him feeling pressure and not getting in the mood.

 

[Brookegarrett]

Sorry for the confusion.. Future I'm sorry about DH troubles... I am about to go crazy I've been so calm not symptom spotting or anything and now... I am 7 dpo n I get a positive opk... This is weird... Daisy I'm glad ur still chugging along when is ur appt?

 

[Lily_Hope]

Hi Future - Sorry to hear that...I'm sure its just a stage though that will pass quickly. I actually felt something similar with my husband a little while ago. I think its hard for them to feel like its a 'job'. Its hard because obviously we have some awareness as to when our fertile window is and we need them to be on the same page as us and to want it as much as we do. I still don't think my husband gets the importance of the timing...lol. Hang in there lovely...I'm sure it will get better!!

Kate - hope you have an awesome time in Whistler. I love that place - spent Jan and Feb there this year skiing.

Mon fingers crossed this month is a better one for you! I'm sure you feel better having some answers now!

Brooke - good sign that your temps are up!!!

Mirage - my fingers are crossed for you too!!!

 

[Mon_n_john]

Future, I am so sorry to hear that your DH is being a bit difficult. I would second the opinion about sitting and talking to him. He does need to understand that timing is very important. Try to see if you can get to the root of the problem: is it that he's not in the mood or is it that he's unsure of having a child?

If it's a mood issue I would suggest considering IUIs. It might be easier that way and timing should be just right!

Brooke, I wish I could give you a suggestion as to why your OPK is positive but I can't think of any. I'm thinking of getting an OvaCue for next cycle because it can confirm ovulation once it's occurred and that might take the guess work out of having multiple days of positive OPKS.

Lily, thank you. I do feel relief in knowing what is going on. I really hope that when I see my doc on Monday she says we can start treatment this month. I just got AF last night so I should ovulate in 14-16 days. I want to be able to TTC again this month so fingers crossed!

 

[TxMom2Be]

A couple of day of not logging on and I'm having to play catch up - amazing how much thing can change in just a matter of a couple of days when ttc! We've spend the past few days painting the master bed/bath and doing a "deep" clean before school starts back up, I am exhausted but ready to enjoy the weekend!

Daisy - Congrats on making it to (and past) such a huge milestone, I'm so excited for you and your family!!

Brooke - Strange things going on with your tests - hopefully it's a sign of a in your VERY near future! Hang in there lady!

Future - I'm sorry to hear that you're having some struggles with you DH, it's funny how men can be just as moody as us women at times. I hope you get some action soon so that you can get your !

I hope you all have a fabulous weekend! We're celebrating my step-daughters 5 year birthday tomorrow, taking her to the toy store today to pick her brain, us and Grandma have a few more gifts to buy! Oh to be 5 and carefree again!

 

[Brookegarrett]

thanks ladies for the wishes..i think ima buy a dollar tree test tomorrow n test..just to see what happens..i dont think it will be anything but maybe itll ease my mind...Hope everyone is enjoyin their saturday B4 long school will be back in

 

[Brookegarrett]

Future, I am so sorry to hear that your DH is being a bit difficult. I would second the opinion about sitting and talking to him. He does need to understand that timing is very important. Try to see if you can get to the root of the problem: is it that he's not in the mood or is it that he's unsure of having a child?

If it's a mood issue I would suggest considering IUIs. It might be easier that way and timing should be just right!

Brooke, I wish I could give you a suggestion as to why your OPK is positive but I can't think of any. I'm thinking of getting an OvaCue for next cycle because it can confirm ovulation once it's occurred and that might take the guess work out of having multiple days of positive OPKS.

Lily, thank you. I do feel relief in knowing what is going on. I really hope that when I see my doc on Monday she says we can start treatment this month. I just got AF last night so I should ovulate in 14-16 days. I want to be able to TTC again this month so fingers crossed!

how much is ovacue?

 

[Brookegarrett]

My Ovulation Chart

heres my chart lemme kno what u think

 

[collie_crazy]

Hope you girls dont mind if I join in here too!

Three weeks ago I lost my little girl at 17 weeks... We really want to start trying again quickly, I feel its the only thing that will help me. If losing my daughter has shown me anything its how much I want a baby (OK, I want her but I cant have her anymore )

I have been using OPKs for the last few days as my PP bleeding stopped. Today I dipped 2 OPKs by accident - I meant to do another pregnancy test just to confirm it was now showing negative! Anyway I was so confused when a few minutes later one of the OPKs went close to positive (very dark test line - but not quite as dark as the control) and the other barely went pink at all!! Whats that about!? It was the same urine! So it has really left me confused. Going to test again soon as I know the ovulation hormone (LH?) builds up during the day...

 

[TxMom2Be]

thanks ladies for the wishes..i think ima buy a dollar tree test tomorrow n test..just to see what happens..i dont think it will be anything but maybe itll ease my mind...Hope everyone is enjoyin their saturday B4 long school will be back in

Brooke - You're in Waco right? Do ya'll have HEB grocery stores? We were just there and they have "their" brand of hpt and ovulation tests, two fro $3. I've never used them so I have no idea how accurate they are.

I like the digital ones, but they are definitely more pricy. I'll just wait it out until it's worth peeing on $10.

 

[TxMom2Be]

I'm confused and anxious - On Wed Aug 3rd my hcg level was 7. When I went in a week later (this past Wednesday) the nurse told me that I should now be below 5 and should expect af anyday. I've felt slighlty bloated the past few days and have definitely experienced some of the pms moodiness....just wondering when the witch is going to arrive. Do any of you remember how long af took after you leves fell below 5?

I'm headed to a friend's house this afternoon to meet her week old little girl, as if I don't have baby fever bad enough......

 

[Brookegarrett]

hpt i took today..kinda confused cuz i see a lil sumthin then idk...im afraid i have line eye...

 

[Mon_n_john]

Hmmm, can't really tell with that pic Brooke. Try taking another pic of the test on a white piece of paper.

 

[Mon_n_john]

And by the way, don't think you are crazy. I took 3 FR tests this month. I thought all 3 were negative, though could have sworn I was "seeing something" in one. I took another look today and 2 out of 3 tests did have a very, very faint line so no, I wasn't crazy. My internet cheapies never had so much as a shadow though, weird.

Post another pic when you can.

 

[mirage25]

Txmom it took mines about 2 weeks 2 fall below 5

Urg...af showed up 2day! Next time no opks! I got pg b4 off of bd'ing twice at the right time I guess so I'll try my luck with that again!

 

[mirage25]

Hi Collie, so sorry about ur loss. I think trying again is something that provides a little comfort 4 all of us. Sounds like the opks could b a little tainted, I have no idea how that could happen! Best of luck 2 u!

 

[Lily_Hope]

Hope you girls dont mind if I join in here too!

Three weeks ago I lost my little girl at 17 weeks... We really want to start trying again quickly, I feel its the only thing that will help me. If losing my daughter has shown me anything its how much I want a baby (OK, I want her but I cant have her anymore )

I have been using OPKs for the last few days as my PP bleeding stopped. Today I dipped 2 OPKs by accident - I meant to do another pregnancy test just to confirm it was now showing negative! Anyway I was so confused when a few minutes later one of the OPKs went close to positive (very dark test line - but not quite as dark as the control) and the other barely went pink at all!! Whats that about!? It was the same urine! So it has really left me confused. Going to test again soon as I know the ovulation hormone (LH?) builds up during the day...

Hi collie_crazy, my heart broke when I read your message. You must be feeling so sad. I hope that you have plenty of support around you.

Not sure what is happening with your OPKs. I think the best time to do an OPK is between 2-8pm (and try to do it around the same time each day). Have you done another pregnancy test yet to confirm its negative? Did your Dr give you any advice around TTC again? And were they able to give you a reason why you miscarried in the second trimester?

 

[Lily_Hope]

Txmom it took mines about 2 weeks 2 fall below 5

Urg...af showed up 2day! Next time no opks! I got pg b4 off of bd'ing twice at the right time I guess so I'll try my luck with that again!

Mirage sorry that AF showed up!! That silly witch!
Just think...in 10 more days you can try again!

 

[Brookegarrett]

I took another test.. Yes i addicted.. I see a shadow where thelie should b it's pink but it's blurry.. Idk if I'm grasping for straws or if it's really the start of sumthin...

 

[Mon_n_john]

Brooke, if you want I can post a pic of what my IC line looked like in June. The first ones only looked like a shadow but then they got darker within a day. I have never had an evap line with a Wondfo IC, not ever. So, it sounds like you have a positive.