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Ooh... My 1st 2 losses were just like that. I didn't find out until 10 and 11 weeks that there was nothing but an empty sac. I felt so hurt and cheated and wrong and lied to. I felt like my body had played the cruelest of all jokes! And, then to have it happen a 2nd time? I dealt pretty well the first time, but the second time sent me into hysterics before I could even get off of the ultrasound table. It was awful. Funny enough, losing a seemingly viable pregnancy at 10 weeks wasn't better. It didn't feel as much like a lie or a joke... but it felt like a broken promise that was never meant to be broken.
I am so sorry!! That is awful! I hope for you that you get your baby soon, I know how hard it is.
I know that if it happens to me again I wouldn't deal as well as before either. I just hope this pregnancy makes it past that 12 week mark. Im at 9 weeks so far. Its hard for me to really want to take great care of myself, you know like to go all out, and then have that happen again. Ive been really depressed since we found out, I don't feel like doing ANYTHING! I just sit here. I have to force myself to eat. To get out of bed. To shower. To get dressed (which I only do half the time.) I have a dr appt April 1st (ironically the day that we took the first preg test last year :/) So I hope I get an ultrasound and I hope there is a baby in there with a heartbeat and all that, Im tired of being lonely. Im a stay at home mom, without a baby
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That's how I was this time for... a while. I didn't want to eat, put on clothes, look at or talk to anyone, I barely wanted to expend the energy to watch TV. I really just wanted to go to sleep and hope that it would be a dream when I woke up. But, it never was... no matter how much I slept.
I've never heard someone say what you just said... But, I'm also a stay at home mom without a baby. What a lousy thing to be, eh?
P.S. Thank you so much for your kind words. My last loss was conceived via IVF (well, ICSI, but whatever). So, it was sort of an expensive pregnancy to lose... and all the more disappointing since it had been such a hard road to achieve the pregnancy to begin with. But, I'm back in treatment and hoping for my next BFP in about 1 month.
"You do realize that even if you get pregnant... well... it could happen again."
REALLY? I thought after 3 MC's that there was no way I could ever have another. That isn't actually a rule? Darn!
I guess just in case we have any hope they want to smash it just in case? Why would someone say that?
I suppose he was just trying to keep me grounded and realistic... but its not like I didn't know it could happen again. Then, the same person became totally supportive when I did get pregnant again... AND IT DID HAPPEN AGAIN!
My first pregnancy was a miscarriage. The worst thing was the Dr came in and told us like this with a big smile "you have a pseudo pregnancy (an empty egg). It shouldn't bother you, just remember there never was a baby" ...having all those hormones still in me, i really wanted to deck her in the face, because in my mind there was a baby for 12 weeks, I felt like it was my fault, and never dealt with my emotions properly. It was hard. the miscarriage lasted for 40 days before I went to the ER..I was so angry with the DR I didnt want to see another one and wanted nature to take its course.
Ooh... My 1st 2 losses were just like that. I didn't find out until 10 and 11 weeks that there was nothing but an empty sac. I felt so hurt and cheated and wrong and lied to. I felt like my body had played the cruelest of all jokes! And, then to have it happen a 2nd time? I dealt pretty well the first time, but the second time sent me into hysterics before I could even get off of the ultrasound table. It was awful. Funny enough, losing a seemingly viable pregnancy at 10 weeks wasn't better. It didn't feel as much like a lie or a joke... but it felt like a broken promise that was never meant to be broken.
I am going through the same exact thing. I was diagnosed with a missed miscarriage/blighted ovum. I am 10 wks today, the ultrasound said the sac measured 6wks. I feel the the same way....such a cruel miscarriage. I have no bleeding, no cramping, and even have some pregnancy symptoms still (although most of them are gone). The waiting is absolute hell, because I cannot move on until it is out of me. And, to make matters worse almost EVERYONE in my life is saying the wrong things to DH and I. I guess they mean well, but they just don't understand. I need to choose my company very carefully these days.
Its the most dreadful feeling!
I'm sorry you're going through this, honey! Feel free to track me down if you ever need to talk!
These are the responses I've had so far:
-my mom has been in complete denial about it and said, "There has never been a miscarriage in our family, you are not bleeding or anything, I doubt you are miscarrying."
-"The baby was not healthy and probably would've been deformed."
-"At least you have 2 healthy boys already."
-"If you were farther along it would've been worse."
-"These things happen, just try again."
-"There are people in the world dealing with worse things than that."
All I want from people is I'm so very sorry for your loss. I know you are hurting right now.
Is that so hard?????????????????????????????
OMG! I'm SOOOOO sorry! If I'm being honest, I'd have to try very hard not to hit someone for saying that... even my mother!
