Many couples who experience miscarriage are subjected to thoughtless comments from people who probably mean well but don't understand that what they're saying not only doesn't help but may hurt the feelings of someone who has miscarried. Here are some examples of things you should not say to someone who has had a miscarriage:
- It was for the best
- At least you know you can get pregnant
- Something was probably wrong with it
- Maybe God knows you are not ready to have children
- You're trying too hard. Just relax, and it will happen.
- Take my kids for an afternoon, and I promise you won't be so sad about losing the baby.
- Be glad. Having a baby changes your life; think of all the fun things you wouldn't have been able to do anymore.
- You should just be happy you have one/two/three children already. You don't need anymore.
- it was just a blob of cells. It wasn't a real baby.
- You're young. You'll get pregnant again
- It happens all the time; it's nothing to worry about
- At least you weren't very far along
- It wasn't meant to be
- It probably happened because ______________.

I really try not to get mad at people when they say this stuff but I just can't!
I always hear it was for the best, well atleast we know you can get pregnant, your young, think of all the things you get to still do now. at least you werent very far along. i just wasnt meant to be.
Well, ya know what, I tell my girlfriends when a jerk breaks their heart that it was for the best because he was a jerk and she can do better and it works there, but not for this. If it was for the best, I wouldn't feel this way.
And yea, I can get pregnant. Most people can. But I lost that baby. And I wanted that one. And just because I can get knocked up again, doesn't mean I won't lose another baby.
If I hear one more time about how I am young look at all the things I still get to do and all the alone time we still have to spend together I am going to self destruct. I wanted that baby, ok. I loved that baby enough to give up anything I couldn't do anymore after I found out I had it inside me and when it got out of me for the rest of it's life. It's what I wanted. I know most 21 year old college students are at toga parties and keggers and taking spring break trips. I never did that stuff anyways. I wanted family vacations to the beach. I WANTED my life to change.
It just wasn't meant to be. Ok, i'll be sure to tell you that when you cant pay your car payment this month because saying that to me in my situation makes as much sense for me to say that to you in that situation. "You didn't get enough hours at work? Guess it just wasn't meant to be."

I just lost a child. Either say you are sorry for my loss and grieve with me or move on. I'm very fragile right now, and if you cant do the simplest human instinct to do when a death occurs that I'd rather you do nothing at all.