I had my first mc when I was about 12 weeks along. If it didn't happen my baby would have been 3 months old now. I couldn't bring myself to even ttc until now. I got all sorts of comments on it at the time, including the common one - its for the better, it might have been sick or disabled. And I just wanted to scream at them - its my baby, don't call her "it"!
But the worst thing I was told was from one of my best girlfriends (who was in early pregnancy at the time) who told me - ah you got it easier, at least you have one kid already, its much worse for women who have miscarriage first.
It made me feel like I shouldn't be feeling what I was (and still am) feeling, because I should be grateful I have a child and just forget about the lost one. But that was my baby too and it was gone and as grateful as I am for my daughter i still grieved for the lost one.
Now I had a 2nd miscarriage and we will only tell my mom. I guess its easier to deal with it on our own.
But the worst thing I was told was from one of my best girlfriends (who was in early pregnancy at the time) who told me - ah you got it easier, at least you have one kid already, its much worse for women who have miscarriage first.
It made me feel like I shouldn't be feeling what I was (and still am) feeling, because I should be grateful I have a child and just forget about the lost one. But that was my baby too and it was gone and as grateful as I am for my daughter i still grieved for the lost one.
Now I had a 2nd miscarriage and we will only tell my mom. I guess its easier to deal with it on our own.