Worried after getting positive result...
- Thread starter allmuddledup
- Start date
Truffleax
TTC our 1st Baby :)
- Joined
- Jan 5, 2010
- Messages
- 563
- Reaction score
- 0
Awww Hunni I am so so sorry 
I too hope they are wrong but I can see why you don't want to get your hopes up.
I feel exactly like you too with the trying again. After my miscarriage like not knowing if you can be happy about your next
and worrying about trying again etc I still don't think I am fully over mine it is so so hard and I just want you to know that we are all here for you and understand how you feel hunni it's heart breaking but if you need to talk you know where we all are.
Loads of hugs!
I too hope they are wrong but I can see why you don't want to get your hopes up.I feel exactly like you too with the trying again. After my miscarriage like not knowing if you can be happy about your next
and worrying about trying again etc I still don't think I am fully over mine it is so so hard and I just want you to know that we are all here for you and understand how you feel hunni it's heart breaking but if you need to talk you know where we all are.Loads of hugs!
allmuddledup
Mum to 1boy 1girl 3angels
- Joined
- Sep 1, 2009
- Messages
- 6,353
- Reaction score
- 0
After being stressed to bits for about 24 hours after I was told that the consultant wanted to do a diagnostic laparoscopy in order to fully exclude an ectopic pregnancy, I am relieved to announce that they are just going to continue to monitor things by blood tests and scans for the moment. My next appointment is Friday.
The lastest hCG result today showed that the pregnancy is still struggling along, but not at all likely to any end other than miscarriage... my hCG levels went up from 1721 to 1747 in 48 hours. I think we all know what that means... confusion! They were hoping the hCG levels would have started dropping by now since it's obviously a failing pregnancy, but they just keep creeping up. I'm worried this will go on for a painfully long time and it will be months before we can start trying again.
I'm also worried that there is something wrong with my body that has caused the pregnancy to fail, such as low progesterone, and that I may end up having to go through this again and again until they figure out what it is. Maybe I'm being overly pessimistic right now, I'm just trying to get through until tomorrow and then the next day and the next day until things start to get better again. I have the feeling that will be a very long time off right now.
To further rub in the loss, the last few bits and pieces of maternity clothes that I ordered two weeks ago (my tummy is bloated to a several-months-pregnant size) just arrived today. I can actually wear them right now (which is good because I need a few trousers that don't cut my inflated belly in two) but it's still depressing thinking about the fact that I'll be debloating soon and just hope I will have the chance to get full use out of them again soon.
Should I be posting in the Pregnancy Loss forum now? It's weird going from TTC after a loss, to BFP Announcement, to Pregnancy Loss, all in a matter of weeks. I hope no one minds that I've stayed here. It's where I want to be, but I guess it will be a while before I am actually able to TTC again. I've got a miscarriage to get through first. God this is depressing.
The lastest hCG result today showed that the pregnancy is still struggling along, but not at all likely to any end other than miscarriage... my hCG levels went up from 1721 to 1747 in 48 hours. I think we all know what that means... confusion! They were hoping the hCG levels would have started dropping by now since it's obviously a failing pregnancy, but they just keep creeping up. I'm worried this will go on for a painfully long time and it will be months before we can start trying again.
I'm also worried that there is something wrong with my body that has caused the pregnancy to fail, such as low progesterone, and that I may end up having to go through this again and again until they figure out what it is. Maybe I'm being overly pessimistic right now, I'm just trying to get through until tomorrow and then the next day and the next day until things start to get better again. I have the feeling that will be a very long time off right now.
To further rub in the loss, the last few bits and pieces of maternity clothes that I ordered two weeks ago (my tummy is bloated to a several-months-pregnant size) just arrived today. I can actually wear them right now (which is good because I need a few trousers that don't cut my inflated belly in two) but it's still depressing thinking about the fact that I'll be debloating soon and just hope I will have the chance to get full use out of them again soon.
Should I be posting in the Pregnancy Loss forum now? It's weird going from TTC after a loss, to BFP Announcement, to Pregnancy Loss, all in a matter of weeks. I hope no one minds that I've stayed here. It's where I want to be, but I guess it will be a while before I am actually able to TTC again. I've got a miscarriage to get through first. God this is depressing.
debgreasby
Happy Mummy!
- Joined
- Aug 15, 2009
- Messages
- 5,538
- Reaction score
- 0
Huge hugs hunni - take care xxxx
MrsRoughton
PREGNANT!
- Joined
- Jul 15, 2009
- Messages
- 792
- Reaction score
- 0
lots of hugs and more hugs hun xxxx
allmuddledup
Mum to 1boy 1girl 3angels
- Joined
- Sep 1, 2009
- Messages
- 6,353
- Reaction score
- 0
The bleeding started this morning, 8 days after learning for certain that this pregnancy isn't going anywhere. It's only light period-like bleeding so far, so I'm sure the worst is yet to come (physically, that is). As much of a rollercoaster as it's been, I'm grateful that I learned in advance what to expect. It's given me time to get my head around the fact that this baby wasn't meant to be. I think I'm coping better with the loss than I expected I would. Or maybe it just hasn't hit me fully yet. I'm waiting for realisation to land like a tonne of bricks. I will be grateful for the light peaceful mood while it lasts. The storm clouds and grief will come when they do. I hope everyone else is well. xox
hb1
Mummy to Oliver
- Joined
- Dec 11, 2009
- Messages
- 4,744
- Reaction score
- 0
Muddledup - this is very sad - I am so sorry it ended like this.
Get the hot water bottle ready - make sure you have the painkillers to hand and as Minimin says be kind to yourself.
We're all here for any support you need
Wishing you lot's of healing and hugs
hx
Get the hot water bottle ready - make sure you have the painkillers to hand and as Minimin says be kind to yourself.
We're all here for any support you need
Wishing you lot's of healing and hugs
hx
puppymom32
Mommy to Xavier
- Joined
- Jun 24, 2009
- Messages
- 7,441
- Reaction score
- 0
So sorry hunni we are here if u need us.
lisa-lovelife
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- Mar 15, 2010
- Messages
- 246
- Reaction score
- 0
hey allmuddledup . i feel for you , i had an ep 2 years a go and had an ep scare 5 month ago but turned out to be an early mis ...im doing everythin in my power to get that bfp but at the same time im scared to death , sending a big fat hug xx
allmuddledup
Mum to 1boy 1girl 3angels
- Joined
- Sep 1, 2009
- Messages
- 6,353
- Reaction score
- 0
The miscarriage is complete. The bleeding only lasted 3 days with two more days of spotting, so I wasn't sure if it was truly over, but when I had a blood test last Friday, my hCG level was down to 8. I am now just waiting for my period to start and for my body to get back to normal.
My health is a worrying thing actually. It looks like I have PCOS but they can't diagnose me for certain until my period starts and they take blood tests to check certain hormone levels. I have started a low GI diet which is supposedly the best way to treat PCOS without medication (and treatment with medication is not ideal as it can lead to other problems). I only started the diet 10 days ago, but I have already lost 5 pounds (I'm back to my pre-pregnancy weight now). I'm sure that can mostly be attributed to the pregnancy ending and hormones dropping back down but I am glad to be losing weight. The diet will hopefully help my fertility. I read that there is an increased risk of miscarriage with PCOS due to high insulin levels and the resulting hormone imbalances, amongst other things. I am hoping that next time will be a success.
I am ready to start trying again though the doctor would prefer I have a period first for dating purposes. I think I am going to leave it in Fate's hands however. If I do manage to fall pregnant before my first period, it won't be too hard to date as I will be doing regular tests just in case. My period returned quite quickly after the ectopic pregnancy once the hCG was gone from my system (my period came about 3 weeks after hCG dropped back to base level) and the miscarriage completed very quickly this time, so I reckon I could be ovulating any time within the next 2 weeks and expect my period will be due by mid to late April. I am trying to keep myself relaxed and non-obsessed. So far, I'm doing pretty well (at least by comparison to last time) and hope to just keep my spirits up, continue with my diet, and keep BDing. I'm going for an optimistic approach.
It helps immensely that my partner is ready to TTC right away. After the ectopic (when we were not TTC) he wasn't quite ready yet, so we were waiting... and it drove me crazy. I found a huge amount of peace as soon as he decided he was ready to TTC too. At least this time, I don't have to go through the agony of waiting for us to be on the same page whilst my biological clock is screaming at me to reproduce. My thoughts aren't agonised when I know that we can try again and that I am doing something about my health to help things along next time.
I don't know if this miscarriage was caused by PCOS or if it would have happened anyway, but I am doing eveything I can to help ensure that PCOS doesn't get in the way in future. I'm going to keep my insulin levels down with the low GI diet and hope that my body will handle the rest the way it should. I don't want to go through this again, but realise that multiple miscarriages could be in the cards for me if I don't get the PCOS under control. I'm just going to keep trying now and hope for the best.
My health is a worrying thing actually. It looks like I have PCOS but they can't diagnose me for certain until my period starts and they take blood tests to check certain hormone levels. I have started a low GI diet which is supposedly the best way to treat PCOS without medication (and treatment with medication is not ideal as it can lead to other problems). I only started the diet 10 days ago, but I have already lost 5 pounds (I'm back to my pre-pregnancy weight now). I'm sure that can mostly be attributed to the pregnancy ending and hormones dropping back down but I am glad to be losing weight. The diet will hopefully help my fertility. I read that there is an increased risk of miscarriage with PCOS due to high insulin levels and the resulting hormone imbalances, amongst other things. I am hoping that next time will be a success.
I am ready to start trying again though the doctor would prefer I have a period first for dating purposes. I think I am going to leave it in Fate's hands however. If I do manage to fall pregnant before my first period, it won't be too hard to date as I will be doing regular tests just in case. My period returned quite quickly after the ectopic pregnancy once the hCG was gone from my system (my period came about 3 weeks after hCG dropped back to base level) and the miscarriage completed very quickly this time, so I reckon I could be ovulating any time within the next 2 weeks and expect my period will be due by mid to late April. I am trying to keep myself relaxed and non-obsessed. So far, I'm doing pretty well (at least by comparison to last time) and hope to just keep my spirits up, continue with my diet, and keep BDing. I'm going for an optimistic approach.
It helps immensely that my partner is ready to TTC right away. After the ectopic (when we were not TTC) he wasn't quite ready yet, so we were waiting... and it drove me crazy. I found a huge amount of peace as soon as he decided he was ready to TTC too. At least this time, I don't have to go through the agony of waiting for us to be on the same page whilst my biological clock is screaming at me to reproduce. My thoughts aren't agonised when I know that we can try again and that I am doing something about my health to help things along next time.
I don't know if this miscarriage was caused by PCOS or if it would have happened anyway, but I am doing eveything I can to help ensure that PCOS doesn't get in the way in future. I'm going to keep my insulin levels down with the low GI diet and hope that my body will handle the rest the way it should. I don't want to go through this again, but realise that multiple miscarriages could be in the cards for me if I don't get the PCOS under control. I'm just going to keep trying now and hope for the best.
