@Suggerhoney I've had 3 girls, and 1 boy so far. With all 3 girls I had absolutely every single symptom in the book, the ms was so bad I had to have an IV put in for some fluids. However, with my son, I had 0 symptoms, and when I say 0, I mean absolutely 0 symptoms. No cramps, no sore nips, not even a tiny bit nausea, no stretching pains, no anything. If it wasn't for the fact I took an HPT, I would not have known I was pregnant based on symptoms alone. It was so worrying almost the entire pregnancy, because I was so scared I'd have a mc, symptoms were a big relief with my girls, especially with my 2nd because for an unknown reason my body goes into preterm labor, so I have to take a shot every week after 12 weeks (around there) to prevent it from happening. The shot is not guaranteed to work, but it has been working. Anyway, the point I'm trying to make is no matter what you tell yourself or how similar each pregnancy was, they're all different. Try to put your emotions aside, if you still feel deep down inside that you're not pregnant, then you're probably not because you know you best, however, if you try and push how you're feeling aside and you still feel like there could be a chance, then hold on to that, because holding on to hope and keeping your head up is what makes things happen. If you allow yourself to spiral and dwell on those feelings, suddenly what you don't want to happen will end up happening and what you do want, will end up being harder to obtain. I know life just seems really unfair sometimes, trust me I know, but if you keep your head up and keep moving forward, you'll see that everything happens at the right time for the right reasons as hard as that is to see right this moment because of how you're feeling. All of us ladies are on here for the same reason, support, and all of us will be here to help you through it if you allow us to.
Im definitely definitely am not pregnant love. Ive known since i was 6 and 7dpo .
I always know so early on.
And im alwsys right. I new i was going to get nothing but bfn again.
Its just not easy staying upright and positive when youve been trying for so so long..
As soon as af shows up which i know it will, then that will be cycle 17 tryung. Altogether ive had 14 cycles of BFN and only 3 with a BFP that ended in loss.
I have not seen a bfp at 10dpo for a whole year now.
My bfp in February was at 13dpo but on that cycle i was breaking out badly all over my face from 4dpo. Then at 11dpo i had terrible cramps and direah and more cramping like af at 12dpo. Then 13dpo i got faint lines on all my tests. The darkest was he clear blue 6 days early that was so blue and so clear but usually by 13dpo when pregnant all my tests are blazing by then.
And then all the stuff about late implantation esp after 9dpo, i just new i was going to lose.
Ive never implanted that late b4.
With my boys and the miscarriage last year and the 4 chemicals i had in 2020, i had my bfp by 10dpo.
I was very positive and so sure we would fall with our rainbow baby. But since hitting 43 7 months ago ive only been pregnant once.
I have too look at it realistically with regards to my age.
I was falling every other cycle or every 3rd cycle nack in 2020 when i was 40..
I was so fertile but it was the sticking. Then we finally fell with my youngest son on the 11th cycle.
But this time around its so much harder.
When i fell last year on cycle 2 and again on cycle 4 and seeing my lines get blazing i had such high hopes for that pregnancy,
When i lost it (my second loss) i was devastated but at the same time happy i could still get pregnant at 42.
Then going 7 months of nothing but bfn was torture.
Then getting that bfp on 4th feb gave me that push to carry on. And i really thought we would catch again.
But that was 5, nearly 6 cycles ago now and nothing but stinking bfns.
So its seriously hard to stay upbeat when thats all you get.
I had zero symptoms with the miscarriage last year. Only tests too show i was pregnant that got darker daily. But i just new the no symptoms was a bad sign for me. And i was right as i lost it.
With all my kids. Thats my boys and my daughter i had symptoms from 6dpo. Or i could say as early as 2dpo with my boys because my boobs were sore right after ovulation.
Ive noticed the last few cycles ive hardly had no ewcm. Loads of watery but barley any ewcm.
So i dont know if thats the issue.
I do appreciate all the support here.
But i feel totally Hopeless. If i was younger id definitely have alot more hope.
. I'm so very excited for you tho, you must be over the moon 
.
infertility depression is definitely real. When you imagine your baby it already exists in your mind and is like you’re grieving a child. Nothing worse than that. I know it’s the last thing you wanna hear but I do hope for a shock for you. You’ve been through a lot these last couple years 
