child benifits UK girls....not good news

[helen1234]

i dont feel lke i missed out on anything from rosie when she was in fulltime childcare. most milestones happen in the 1st yr and may leave covers that

i dont think anyone who really doesnt have a choice would put their child into childcare, if they were able to stay home and bring their child up. whats the point in having children then?

wether at home or in childcare as long as they are getting stimulation, education and lots of cuddles, then they wont be missing out. i'm sure rhys prefers to be with me, but i reckon he'd love nursery as well, he starts play school when he's 2 1/2 i think he's going to love it

 

[Hayley90]

Oh and just to add... i REALLY want the SMP pay to go UP.

I had to go back stupidly early, and i regret that every single day, i always will. There was nothing i could have done, I had to go back.

I dont think any mother should have to leave her baby at home, in nursery, with a childminder when they are 11 weeks old, or younger.

The government need to wise up and realise SMP is not enough to live on in a huge part of the UK. And the annoying thing is, the solution is easy. Currently SMP is paid by the employer, but they can claim back something like 90% of it from the government. If they were to increase the amount of SMP paid, all they would need to do is make the employer accountable for more of it! Instead of paynig out 90% to every company who has an employee off on mat leave, pay out 60% or something.

Yes it's putting more pressure on the companies, but if a mother is looked after properly whilst on leave she will be much happier to return to work at her own pace. Unlike me... i was rushed back, with little thanks and im now jobhunting for somewhere that doesn't take me for granted!

 

[AppleBlossom]

Tbh if the government are so bothered about benefits and unemployment they should lower the age of which a child is entitled to free childcare. If it was put down to 1 instead of 3, people could put their children in nursery without having massive fees to worry about and go to work. Yes it might cost a fair bit but they would end up paying less out in benefits. I'm sure it was a Lib Dem policy to lower the age but of course we all know that their policies are redundant know they're brown nosing the Tories. I'm currently still looking for a job. I also to an extent don't believe there are "no jobs" out there. There are always jobs, just ones people don't want to do. For me it's trying to find one suitable enough to work around childcare. An office job would be ideal for me but there aren't many of those about that don't require previous experience of office work. But for the people who don't have kids or do but can get adequate childcare if need be (as in they have a partner) they are quite able to get a job in a restaurant for example because the late night shifts don't interfere with childcare. I worked as a waitress for 3 years and often worked 16 hour shifts until 3am (I worked in conference and banqueting in a hotel) and most nights I wouldn't leave before 11pm. But now, Grace is in bed at half 6 and I have nobody to come over to constantly look after her. So my flexibility for now is limited. If anyone knows of anywhere though, give me a shout, I'll take any job (within reason obviously lol)

 

[Hayley90]

AB - try public sector! I worked in london, flexi is guaranteed, they DONT require experience ( i had none!) the pay is better than private sector, and as long as your department isnt cut, you're pretty safe.... they are the best to work for in your situation as they have to look at everyone fairly, and flexi time is a common thing... x

 

[AppleBlossom]

Thanks Hayley, will have a look into it. I'm guessing I would have more luck searching for jobs in Liverpool as it's a big city. It's a pain that I don't drive but I can't afford to buy/run a car lol. If I can't find office work i might try retail

 

[Hayley90]

www.jobsgopublic.com or .co.uk cant remember. Its country wide. There was a cleaning job on there last week, 6 hours a day, 5 days a week earning more than me. I should have applied! x

 

[AppleBlossom]

Ooh thanks, will have a look in the morning when I'm not on my phone. My mum would wet herself if I took a cleaning job because she thinks I'm terrible at cleaning

 

[BlackBerry25]

I think the benefits should be cut, not all of them, but the ones like Linzi has mentioned do seem a bit ridiculous from an outside view. I agree this is part of the global debt problem, where we all seem to think we are owed all of this money.

I think the problem needs to be solved before it starts... I don't think throwing money at people really helps them. Education is key.

(I, in no way, am commenting on people who are on temp. housing benefits or disability. Obviously it is good to live in a culture and community that help each other out)

 

[Hayley90]

My mum has a massive long list of recruitment sites AB... I will get her to write a list of the public ones, but that seems to be the one most use.. .my council use it!

Also - the census is coming up soon so if you wanted something temporary that gave you a bit of experience there are some jobs for that popping up all over the place, its hourly pay and its pretty good rates from what ive seen xx

 

[AppleBlossom]

Aww thank you Hun, that's really helpful

 

[Hayley90]

no worries lovely, i'll send you a list tomorrow if there's any decent ones (and if i remember ) xx

 

[Avalanche]

I'm confused. You say you pay £800 a month for each child to attend nursery, so £1600 a month. Then you say you pay all bills yourself and claim no benefits. Then previously, in other threads you have said you work part time.

Then you say you don't live with your partner as you can't afford to. Which to me, suggests you are claiming benefits which would reduce if you live together.

I just don't see how you work part time, pay £1600 a month for nursery and pay rent and bills.

Sorry if I've got the wrong end of the stick.

Ah well, I can bitch about the benefits system until the cows come home, but my real issue is with us middle-income families being forgotten about

My issue is with people on benefits. Some get more a week than I earn in a week. So please show me where that is fair? I work my arse off for my children. Why should someone who stays at home with their child because they dont want to put them in childcare or because they will only be £50 better off get more money than someone who puts money into this country in order for them to do nothing! Im sorry but the middle income families are being forgotten because your also paying for them to stay at home. More so because lots of benefits have been pulled from under you.
Im a low income family and even we are suffering.

I assume you mean people like me then? I would go to work in a heartbeat if I could. The cheapest nursery near me is £35 a day. For 5 days a week it would cost me £700 a month. I don't even get £700 a month full stop. With what I do get I need to pay to keep a roof over my child's head and food on the table. I don't need to make excuses because as a single parent, there is no way I can get a full time job at the minute that would pay for the things we need AND childcare. I think, in terms of people like me (single parents on benefits who fully intend to get into work as soon as it realistically possible) there is no problem with recieving benefits. It's the people who have never and never will put back into the system what they've taken out

I have been a single parent. Try what I do. BOTH my children are in private nursery and that costs £804 a month each with a measly little £80 off of my bill.. WOOP DE WOOP. I still work. My OH doesnt live with me and I pay ALL of my bills myself because we cant afford to live together. We have made our sacrifices. I could give up work and he could move in but I WONT. It wouldnt be me if I did.
Also, if you go back this post was about those who never want to go to work. Having children and using excuses is what we was discussing.
Like I put in a previous post my mum has worked since she left school. Never ever being unemployed, she has been made redundant and this country wont help her. Why can we help those on benefits but not someone like my mum who has dropped £2000 a month in wages and was given a redunancy package that wouldnt even buy you a new flipping car, She has a mortgage and bills and is cutting back on plenty things yet there are people on benefits who do well enough. Thats what I am talking about. Its disgusting.

Alright, chill out. I accept I'm a bad person because I live on benefits. Whatever. I'm not here to be judged. If you have been a single parent then you'll know how little people on benefits actually get. I don't need to feel guilty because I worked part time from the age of 13 as a saturday girl in my grandparent's hairdressers up until I was 16 when I worked as a waitress up until I was 19. I have a great work ethic. I will work again and hopefully soon. I get annoyed at the lazy people who sit about watching Jeremy Kyle and drinking cider all day who recieve benefits, who doesn't? I just think it is unfair to slag off people who have genuine reasons as to why they are on them and fully intend to pay back their debt. I have a million and one reasons which I don't feel I need to justify. So shoot me for getting a bit of help. I alread said I think it's great people can work aside from looking after kids, well done to you. I hope I can do the same in the not so distant future

No I dont know because even as a single parent I worked. I have never claimed benefits so I dont know. Im not asking you to justify anything. You quoted my post originally so I am just replying. I dont want to hear reasons I am quite happy to think what I do. Its how I see it and how I continue to see it. I am also not looking to fight or argue. I am simply stating that there are people out there that use excuses when they are perfectly capable of getting up and finding a job. Like I have said this post wasnt about people who genuinely cant work its about people who use excuses that really are lame. They dont trust childcare and they cant work because of this and that. Yes not everyone will find a job and not everyone will be off benefits but the more this country makes it easier the less likely it will change.

No its not easy I know that but people take the pee out of this by using it as an excuse. What if we all did that? Be plenty of jobs then wouldnt there?

 

[Tegans Mama]

I'm confused. You say you pay £800 a month for each child to attend nursery, so £1600 a month. Then you say you pay all bills yourself and claim no benefits. Then previously, in other threads you have said you work part time.

Then you say you don't live with your partner as you can't afford to. Which to me, suggests you are claiming benefits which would reduce if you live together.

I just don't see how you work part time, pay £1600 a month for nursery and pay rent and bills.

Sorry if I've got the wrong end of the stick.

I don't think you're the only person who has gotten the wrong end of this stick. If she is claiming no benefits, why can't she and her partner afford to live together? Surely if neither of them are claiming benefits they would be far better off living together and avoiding paying two rents/council tax bills etc? For someone who is ranting about people living off benefits, not to be accusatory but that stinks of actual benefit fraud to me. I know that I would be FAR better off were I a single parent but I'm not - I rely on my partner to help provide for me and Tegan. It really baffles me that someone can get on their high horse about people going to work, when apparently the poster you are reffering to earns over 2k a month and also claims benefits?

 

[tasha41]

I admittedly didn't read TOO much of this thread but I have to defend my fellow North Americans here. I don't think anyone is bitter or saying we manage without so you should too-- I, personally, think that if we can manage, you CAN too without the grants (which are quite large IMO). The reality is to improve the debt situation, taxes either have to go up or cuts have to be made. Money has to come from somewhere

But then I am honestly of the belief that if you're of legal age to work and don't have a disability preventing you from working.. then you should be.. even if it's "below you" or a job you are overqualified for. I've worked since I was 16, at a grocery store, a day camp, the culture & rec department of our city and McDonalds. I was mortified that I was going to be pregnant working at McDonalds, and that if my child ever asked I'd have to say yeah I worked at McDonalds until you were born (well now I'll have to say until you turned 2.. at least!) but when you have a baby to provide for, crib to buy, stuff like that, it's the wrong time to start feeling proud. I busted my butt there until I was past 37 weeks pregnant to afford the things I needed for her, yes I had a partner but we were unexpectedly pregnant after only 6 months in our relationship really (a little over a year of dating though).. so I wasn't going to quit and rely on him while I was able to work and how could I have known what the future would hold?

Sometimes I think on benefits, with a reliable amount of money coming in, with a consistent schedule for your child, with better health benefits (free) than you get paying into with a lot of minimum wage sort of employer.. is a better situation than a single mom struggling with shift work, relying on daycare --> my job in particular you have to work 32hrs per week for the privelage of being able to pay into health benefits, since dental and prescriptions are NOT covered on our universal healthcare plan always. But you don't get straight 8-4s etc, you get a 6-2, 10-6, 9-5, 8-4.. random hours, and a daycare that accepts subsidies (which there is a waiting list for too > if you have to pay full price for childcare there is literally no point in working, you couldn't afford to go to work. It'd be daycare or rent!) isn't open 24 hours a day. Even if they were, I'm sure CAS would get involved with that sort of inconsistent schedule, a worn out tired miserable mum, etc.

If I was single, I'd have to go on welfare. I am fortunate enough to have a supportive family who adore my daughter and would do pretty well whatever they could to help me, but they can't quit work so I can go make minimum wage when they are making 3.5-4x as much as I am per hour. My sister can't drop out of school to watch my kid.

So I wish people wouldn't be so judgmental!! Being a mother at all isn't the easiest thing in the world emotionally/physically/mentally without other women, MOTHERS, judging you for how you pay for your child, how you feed them, how you discipline them, how you wean them, if you vaccinate etc Compassion!!!

 

[Laura2919]

I'm confused. You say you pay £800 a month for each child to attend nursery, so £1600 a month. Then you say you pay all bills yourself and claim no benefits. Then previously, in other threads you have said you work part time.

Then you say you don't live with your partner as you can't afford to. Which to me, suggests you are claiming benefits which would reduce if you live together.

I just don't see how you work part time, pay £1600 a month for nursery and pay rent and bills.

Sorry if I've got the wrong end of the stick.

Ah well, I can bitch about the benefits system until the cows come home, but my real issue is with us middle-income families being forgotten about

My issue is with people on benefits. Some get more a week than I earn in a week. So please show me where that is fair? I work my arse off for my children. Why should someone who stays at home with their child because they dont want to put them in childcare or because they will only be £50 better off get more money than someone who puts money into this country in order for them to do nothing! Im sorry but the middle income families are being forgotten because your also paying for them to stay at home. More so because lots of benefits have been pulled from under you.
Im a low income family and even we are suffering.

I assume you mean people like me then? I would go to work in a heartbeat if I could. The cheapest nursery near me is £35 a day. For 5 days a week it would cost me £700 a month. I don't even get £700 a month full stop. With what I do get I need to pay to keep a roof over my child's head and food on the table. I don't need to make excuses because as a single parent, there is no way I can get a full time job at the minute that would pay for the things we need AND childcare. I think, in terms of people like me (single parents on benefits who fully intend to get into work as soon as it realistically possible) there is no problem with recieving benefits. It's the people who have never and never will put back into the system what they've taken out

I have been a single parent. Try what I do. BOTH my children are in private nursery and that costs £804 a month each with a measly little £80 off of my bill.. WOOP DE WOOP. I still work. My OH doesnt live with me and I pay ALL of my bills myself because we cant afford to live together. We have made our sacrifices. I could give up work and he could move in but I WONT. It wouldnt be me if I did.
Also, if you go back this post was about those who never want to go to work. Having children and using excuses is what we was discussing.
Like I put in a previous post my mum has worked since she left school. Never ever being unemployed, she has been made redundant and this country wont help her. Why can we help those on benefits but not someone like my mum who has dropped £2000 a month in wages and was given a redunancy package that wouldnt even buy you a new flipping car, She has a mortgage and bills and is cutting back on plenty things yet there are people on benefits who do well enough. Thats what I am talking about. Its disgusting.

Alright, chill out. I accept I'm a bad person because I live on benefits. Whatever. I'm not here to be judged. If you have been a single parent then you'll know how little people on benefits actually get. I don't need to feel guilty because I worked part time from the age of 13 as a saturday girl in my grandparent's hairdressers up until I was 16 when I worked as a waitress up until I was 19. I have a great work ethic. I will work again and hopefully soon. I get annoyed at the lazy people who sit about watching Jeremy Kyle and drinking cider all day who recieve benefits, who doesn't? I just think it is unfair to slag off people who have genuine reasons as to why they are on them and fully intend to pay back their debt. I have a million and one reasons which I don't feel I need to justify. So shoot me for getting a bit of help. I alread said I think it's great people can work aside from looking after kids, well done to you. I hope I can do the same in the not so distant future

No I dont know because even as a single parent I worked. I have never claimed benefits so I dont know. Im not asking you to justify anything. You quoted my post originally so I am just replying. I dont want to hear reasons I am quite happy to think what I do. Its how I see it and how I continue to see it. I am also not looking to fight or argue. I am simply stating that there are people out there that use excuses when they are perfectly capable of getting up and finding a job. Like I have said this post wasnt about people who genuinely cant work its about people who use excuses that really are lame. They dont trust childcare and they cant work because of this and that. Yes not everyone will find a job and not everyone will be off benefits but the more this country makes it easier the less likely it will change.

No its not easy I know that but people take the pee out of this by using it as an excuse. What if we all did that? Be plenty of jobs then wouldnt there?

I meant I dont claim income support or JSA. I dont stay at home and claim benefits is what I meant. I get help with my nursery fees but that is it. I would be better off not working but I work because thats how it is.
I dont get HB, claim JSA or income support. And if you read my posts I said this isnt everyone on benefits but some people use excuses that arent justified. Yes Appleblossom is going to go back to work and thats great but there are tons of people out there that havent got that logic and they arent going to bother because being on benefits is actually bringing in more income than a job would.
My point is that there is people out there that get more in benefits than I earn.
This is why I say EVERYONE should help pay back the debt. I am. My tax credits from April will be cut as they have cut the % of what they pay to cover childcare so if people who are working are having cuts so should those who arent.
We each have had a hand in the debt. Some get JSA, some get Income support, some get tax credits, HB and more. I am paying back my bit by them cutting my tax credits.

 

[Laura2919]

I'm confused. You say you pay £800 a month for each child to attend nursery, so £1600 a month. Then you say you pay all bills yourself and claim no benefits. Then previously, in other threads you have said you work part time.

Then you say you don't live with your partner as you can't afford to. Which to me, suggests you are claiming benefits which would reduce if you live together.

I just don't see how you work part time, pay £1600 a month for nursery and pay rent and bills.

Sorry if I've got the wrong end of the stick.

I don't think you're the only person who has gotten the wrong end of this stick. If she is claiming no benefits, why can't she and her partner afford to live together? Surely if neither of them are claiming benefits they would be far better off living together and avoiding paying two rents/council tax bills etc? For someone who is ranting about people living off benefits, not to be accusatory but that stinks of actual benefit fraud to me. I know that I would be FAR better off were I a single parent but I'm not - I rely on my partner to help provide for me and Tegan. It really baffles me that someone can get on their high horse about people going to work, when apparently the poster you are reffering to earns over 2k a month and also claims benefits?

Maybe you should look because I have never once said I dont get help. I said I dont claim benefits and I meant JSA or income support. I get CB and I get tax credits. I get help with my nursery costs and no we cant afford to live together because of this because if we did move in together I would lose it and we cant afford that or I would have to give up work. This is why I understand everyones situation is different but my point I am making is everyone should have to pay back the debt. Not just those who work. Why should it all be put on those who work.

 

[Laura2919]

The met is a good place to have a job if you can keep it. They offer 9 months full pay for Maternity leave and then after that you can take a year of absence. Its good. My mum is working her last month at the met as she was made redundant.

 

[bloodbinds]

Ahhh, i can't fight either side really (or maybe i can argue both?)

I'm working part-time so i do get benefits, but i also earn a wage as well. Saying that though, because of how little i actually earn, i don't have to pay any tax (which is awesome) but i do get WTC and CTC (and housing benefit, council tax benefit, child benefit)

So i get the best of both worlds, i still spend a fair bit of time with my daughter, get free money off the gov, and also go to work and get a wage. Why can't everyone be as awesome as me?! Lol.

If i lost this job and went back to living off benefits completely, then i would I have loads of talents and things and personally think i would be wasted doing the jobs no one else wants to do (well, actually, one job i would hate to do is cleaning, as i hate cleaning, and i've seen a few cleaner jobs around. But i don't think they would give me the job anyway, if they looked in my house) so i would probably hold out for a marketing job.

Does it matter if i would have to live off benefits? That's what they are there for, we're still going to have to pay the same amount of tax and stuff no matter who is claiming benefits, cuz if they are not spending it on that, then they will find something else to spend it on. Is it really that big of a deal?

 

[Laura2919]

Ahhh, i can't fight either side really (or maybe i can argue both?)

I'm working part-time so i do get benefits, but i also earn a wage as well. Saying that though, because of how little i actually earn, i don't have to pay any tax (which is awesome) but i do get WTC and CTC (and housing benefit, council tax benefit, child benefit)

So i get the best of both worlds, i still spend a fair bit of time with my daughter, get free money off the gov, and also go to work and get a wage. Why can't everyone be as awesome as me?! Lol.

If i lost this job and went back to living off benefits completely, then i would I have loads of talents and things and personally think i would be wasted doing the jobs no one else wants to do (well, actually, one job i would hate to do is cleaning, as i hate cleaning, and i've seen a few cleaner jobs around. But i don't think they would give me the job anyway, if they looked in my house) so i would probably hold out for a marketing job.

Does it matter if i would have to live off benefits? That's what they are there for, we're still going to have to pay the same amount of tax and stuff no matter who is claiming benefits, cuz if they are not spending it on that, then they will find something else to spend it on. Is it really that big of a deal?

Im not saying that no one should be on benefits but they were only originally there to support people whilst they were out of a job. there are people taking that for granted.
If you wanna be on benefits thats fine my point is if the working have to pay back so do the ones who arent working.

 

[Serene123]

Everyone is paying back the debt that's what the VAT rise is meant to do.

Some people can just afford to pay back more than others, and I think if you and your OH are living apart so you have more money, that you're kind of out of order commenting on other people who are on benefits. Because quite clearly you and your OH are not entitled to that much childcare help.

Everyone does what they have to do, I know. You just can't go around judging other people when you're using it to suit you, too.

Just to add, you're not actually helping us pay it back if you're claiming 1600 a month and not paying that much in tax.