Dealing with azoospermia?

[Mikihob]

Hi Rainbow so sorry for you, feel your pain. X

I have not told anybody at work about doing IVF - already done 4 and to FET for the same reason. They know about my ectopic but they don't knows was IVF ectopic and keep putting stupid questions. I keep telling we are not ready. The most insensitive is my sister knows my full situation (not about donor sperm and shearing my eggs) and tells me I may need to give up, may not be to happen for me. She is pregnant with twins after 2 months trying naturally and calls me daily to chat about her pregnancy. But she is just enjoying her pregnancy so I need to be supportive.

It's hard when the people closest to you, who know what you are going through, are being insensitive. During my birthday dinner last month, my moms boyfriend's daughter made a joke about their being a baby in my belly. My mom replies, "Man I wish there was" I almost lost it in front of everyone. It was really tough. I think if DH and I have to do IVF and/or donor sperm I wouldn't tell anyone either. Too many questions and unneeded advice.

I am glad that you are able to be supportive for your sister. You have tons of support right here with us ladies.

 

[Rainbow123]

Aw Izabela, sounds like you've had such a rough time. I wouldn't dare pry into my colleagues' business, it's so annoying they pry into ours! Grrr.
That must be so hard for you with your sister, you are very strong to be so supportive towards her. It was my friend at work's first try. When we first told my mother in law (who doesn't think for a moment it is my DH with the fertility issues ), she said that she doesn't want to see us still trying in 10 years and maybe we should think about adopting. We've not even had our first attempt yet! And tbh, if we end up having to use DS, there's quite a good chance we'll get pregnant, according to my FS.
You will get your baby Izabela, I'm sure of it. And when we do get our babies we will never forget how important they are, and value them every minute of every day. Wish it didn't have to cost so much though, lol! XXXXX

 

[gem10]

Well folks, its a big fat negative for me. Absolutely devastated. We are back to square one. This is the worst feeling I have ever had. We were so close, jumped over so many obstacles. And here we are, back to where we started.

 

[rdleela]

Awh gem, I'm so, so sorry! To go through all of this and get a BFN just sucks!! Big Internet hugs

 

[Stinas]

Oh gem! Im sorry! Listen dont give up!!!....it WILL happen!!! I went through a few cycles myself before I got my BFP! Just like my re said...sometimes it just takes time. In the end we will appreciate it much more than normal people.
Keep your head up! You have all of us as support!!

 

[deafgal01]

Oh sounds like everyone need a hug lately- rainbow, gem, miki, and Iza!

Stinas is right though, hang in there, it will soon be your turn to be pregnant!

 

[Izabela]

Hi Rainbow so sorry for you, feel your pain. X

I have not told anybody at work about doing IVF - already done 4 and to FET for the same reason. They know about my ectopic but they don't knows was IVF ectopic and keep putting stupid questions. I keep telling we are not ready. The most insensitive is my sister knows my full situation (not about donor sperm and shearing my eggs) and tells me I may need to give up, may not be to happen for me. She is pregnant with twins after 2 months trying naturally and calls me daily to chat about her pregnancy. But she is just enjoying her pregnancy so I need to be supportive.

It's hard when the people closest to you, who know what you are going through, are being insensitive. During my birthday dinner last month, my moms boyfriend's daughter made a joke about their being a baby in my belly. My mom replies, "Man I wish there was" I almost lost it in front of everyone. It was really tough. I think if DH and I have to do IVF and/or donor sperm I wouldn't tell anyone either. Too many questions and unneeded advice.

I am glad that you are able to be supportive for your sister. You have tons of support right here with us ladies.

That must been so hard for you. I hope you getting your babies soon, hopefully with your husband genetics. My husband and I are fully happy with our SD decision as passing genetics are not as import as having a healthy child. We also gave it a good go of 3 IVF .

 

[Izabela]

Well folks, its a big fat negative for me. Absolutely devastated. We are back to square one. This is the worst feeling I have ever had. We were so close, jumped over so many obstacles. And here we are, back to where we started.

So sorry Gem and I hope the next IVF is your time.

 

[Izabela]

Aw Izabela, sounds like you've had such a rough time. I wouldn't dare pry into my colleagues' business, it's so annoying they pry into ours! Grrr.
That must be so hard for you with your sister, you are very strong to be so supportive towards her. It was my friend at work's first try. When we first told my mother in law (who doesn't think for a moment it is my DH with the fertility issues ), she said that she doesn't want to see us still trying in 10 years and maybe we should think about adopting. We've not even had our first attempt yet! And tbh, if we end up having to use DS, there's quite a good chance we'll get pregnant, according to my FS.
You will get your baby Izabela, I'm sure of it. And when we do get our babies we will never forget how important they are, and value them every minute of every day. Wish it didn't have to cost so much though, lol! XXXXX

Thanks Rainbow it is so much support on this tread. It is so insensitive of you MIL to plan ahead for you. Only you can decide when you had enough and you want to step aside and take a different route. Especially you had not give IVF a go. As I already said my husband and I are very happy with our DS choice. We are not going to tell nobody neither DH parents although they new about our only option being IVF due to his genetic condition past from their 2 defect genes. We decided to stop trying with DH sperm due to low chances and possible genetics implication such as CF carrier and boys possible infertile. We also would not been able to finance infinite cycles.

 

[Izabela]

Oh sounds like everyone need a hug lately- rainbow, gem, miki, and Iza!

Stinas is right though, hang in there, it will soon be your turn to be pregnant!

Any simptoms Deafgal? I had lots of cramping last night, but more like enlarging - really I can described it as a front pen being inside my uterus. Insominia for 3 hours. I never get that. I hope is not AF that early. Day 8 today.

 

[deafgal01]

No symptoms at all but I did have weird dreams the other day!

 

[bubumaci]

Oh Gem, I am so so sorry - sending you huge hugs

 

[Rainbow123]

So sorry Gem. Thinking of and praying for you hun. XXXXXXXXXXX

 

[Rainbow123]

Izabela - We were originally planning on telling our parents what the cause of our IF was. The longer we've gone not telling them (all they know is one of us is having an operation, then we'll be able to give IVF a shot) the more I don't want to have to tell them. I think it depends on what the outcome of the mTESE is. If we find sperm then maybe we tell them, if we don't and we go the DS route we've been advised to be open about it and tell our baby and the whole world... I'm at peace with the possibility of DS, but I keep feeling like it's no one else's damn business! I feel like our privacy has already been ripped to shreds so much already that I just want to keep this to ourselves. My DH's parents have both said recently that we really should let the rest of the family know (DH has 3 brothers, one has 2 kids already), and every time DH mentions it I hit the roof! I've told them all that we stopped trying due to finances being on the low side (kinda true with saving up for IVF) and I just want to leave it at that until we do get pregnant. I think I may need to spell it out to them at some point, but DH's mother can be such an arse. She's used to getting her own way and dominating people into doing what she wants, I'm usually quite laid back, so I can imagine she's not going to like what I have to say... Flipping heck, I only meant to write a quick reply and I've got all 'ranty' again! Sorry!
Have your clinic tried to persuade you to tell your baby about DS or are they leaving it up to you? It's so difficult to make the right decision. I think this is why I'm so keen to keep things between DH and me for as long as possible..
Anyhoo! DH has bought us some tasty treats for tonight and I plan on having a goodly amount to drink (I'm bloody need it after this week lol!) so have a super weekend lovely ladies and lots of love to you all !
XXXXXXXXXXXXXX

 

[deafgal01]

Mine did not pressure me about telling baby of using donor but it is strongly encouraged to do so if you do not plan to make sure blood types match or whatever because kids will find out one way or another. My counselor asked us how we thought we might tell our baby and what age we thought was a good age to tell the baby as well as how we think they might act (a young child vs a teenager).

Dh and I agreed that we want our baby to know first before we tell my parents and other people. This minimizes the risk/chance of child finding out by accident from someone else and not us.

 

[Rainbow123]

Mine did not pressure me about telling baby of using donor but it is strongly encouraged to do so if you do not plan to make sure blood types match or whatever because kids will find out one way or another. My counselor asked us how we thought we might tell our baby and what age we thought was a good age to tell the baby as well as how we think they might act (a young child vs a teenager).

Dh and I agreed that we want our baby to know first before we tell my parents and other people. This minimizes the risk/chance of child finding out by accident from someone else and not us.

Thanks lovely I don't know what I'd do without you ladies, it is so great to be able to share experiences with people going through the same thing. It's so difficult to know what to do for the best, with regards to who to tell, when to tell, whether to them them in the first place. I think what DH and I decided last night is that we don't have to make any concrete decisions yet, and so we will keep this our business (not our parents') until we are completely ready and sure of what we want to do. XXX

 

[Izabela]

Izabela - We were originally planning on telling our parents what the cause of our IF was. The longer we've gone not telling them (all they know is one of us is having an operation, then we'll be able to give IVF a shot) the more I don't want to have to tell them. I think it depends on what the outcome of the mTESE is. If we find sperm then maybe we tell them, if we don't and we go the DS route we've been advised to be open about it and tell our baby and the whole world... I'm at peace with the possibility of DS, but I keep feeling like it's no one else's damn business! I feel like our privacy has already been ripped to shreds so much already that I just want to keep this to ourselves. My DH's parents have both said recently that we really should let the rest of the family know (DH has 3 brothers, one has 2 kids already), and every time DH mentions it I hit the roof! I've told them all that we stopped trying due to finances being on the low side (kinda true with saving up for IVF) and I just want to leave it at that until we do get pregnant. I think I may need to spell it out to them at some point, but DH's mother can be such an arse. She's used to getting her own way and dominating people into doing what she wants, I'm usually quite laid back, so I can imagine she's not going to like what I have to say... Flipping heck, I only meant to write a quick reply and I've got all 'ranty' again! Sorry!
Have your clinic tried to persuade you to tell your baby about DS or are they leaving it up to you? It's so difficult to make the right decision. I think this is why I'm so keen to keep things between DH and me for as long as possible..
Anyhoo! DH has bought us some tasty treats for tonight and I plan on having a goodly amount to drink (I'm bloody need it after this week lol!) so have a super weekend lovely ladies and lots of love to you all !
XXXXXXXXXXXXXX

people who have not been on this journey can't understand us. This is why this forum is so supportive.

The doctor said is fine not to tell the child lots of people chose not to say but the consuler try to convince to say to the child since is a baby/ toddler. We probably are not going to tell the child because by DH parents would treat it different (even so is there fault for us needing IcSI - their genetics and my DH is their second child with CF, after the odds were 1 in 2). His brother has 3 ICSI children, as far as we know not donor.
The donor we chose has the same blood group as me and is left handed like me and my DH. Just happened to be the closer as looks and had a good family health record (our priority). One way the child could identify is that he is not going to be a CF carrier and any child born to my DH would be a carrier. So we may think about. And in Europe donor sperms are not anonymous since 2005. The child after 18 could check the donor register and get enough details.

 

[tulip11]

hi I got a question regarding clomid. My hubby is now taking clomid and its his first month but dr said that he has to take these for 3 months right. but what makes me confused that on medicine its mentioned that take these tablets for 21 days and then leave for 7 days so does it complete one month in this way ? like if we have to start again after that 7 days off so that would be 2nd month... quite strange for me...anyone out there to help me out.

 

[deafgal01]

Tulip- no idea. My dh didn't have that 7 days break.

 

[tulip11]

Tulip- no idea. My dh didn't have that 7 days break.

did your DH take 25 mg ?