Giving birth in a hotel room

[Geekylora]

This is what someone recommended for this situation..

" My midwife is going to bring her inflatable birthing tub, so it will be sanitary, and we cover everything with shower liners just like at home. We will have our own sheets for the birth that go over the liners, and then for after the birth. Everything will be covered and cleaned. She is going to take the trash, and do the laundry and bring it back. I am going to get there before I start labor or at least bad labor so things can be set up and cleaned a little. Then we are going to stay about a week after the birth so she can come by and do her 2 day after check and I can feel up to driving home."

So. Follow this plan for a SAFE, SANITARY birth.
Have someone there with you.
Clean up before you set things into motion.
Use proper liners and tarps to keep the mess down.



Other people suggested nicer hotels that have sound proofed walls.
And you will want to book the room for a few days after you give birth, and schedule a postpartum appointment for as soon as possible.


If this is done safely and respectfully (respectful of the hotel staff & other hotel goers.. they are still people too.) everything would be fine. In theory.

 

[Amygdala]

Bringing your own pool and liners for everything definitely sounds like a good idea! I'd also add plenty of your own towels (personally, I'd boil wash them beforehand), maybe buy some white ones so you can bleach them after, if needed.

What does your midwife recommend regarding timing and "sneaking" past the front desk? I'd be very anxious about that, especially in labour. Maybe DH can check in and then get the luggage and you can shield from view a little behind your bags?

Have you asked your midwife if the hospital know that they've delivered babies there? That might put your mind at rest somewhat?

Also, have you thought about aftercare? Newborn screenings, maternal checks etc? Do you have a paediatrician set up for when you get back home?

 

[Viola Payne]

I don want to give birth in a hospital and I have to travel to be close to a hospital. I'm guessing you all live in big cities!! In more remote places people sometimes have to travel to give birth. There was an article recently about women in the arctic who have to travel 5 hours to get to the nearest hospital and give birth. For remote women who don't want to birth in a hospital a hotel is a common choice.

I do not live in a big city, the hospital is about an hour away from me.
I just did not know this was a thing! So please do not be offended, it is just different from what I know. Honestly, most of us are probably completely ignorant to this happening.

If this is common practice I would think the staff at the hotel would be aware of it? I would let them know incase there is an accident or need for emergencies.

Again, I'm REALLY curious about your birth plan.

Who will be at the hotel with you?
How you will manage the mess and clean up?
What do you plan to do after delivery? ect.



I agree that you should NOT use the jacuzzi or hotel bath. These two things are literally riddled with bacteria. I would suggest using a kiddie pool for a water birth and for easy clean up if it's something you really want to do.

The hotels don't necessarily support women giving birth there but the midwives support women who don't want to give birth in a hospital and don't have any choice but a hotel. My midwife would be there, my friend who teaches prenatal yoga will be there (or my mother), my husband, and our son. It will be well attended!

Thanks for pointing that out about the jacuzzi. I will exit it once my waters break and will not go back in after. I'm guessing my midwife would tell me the same thing.

As for cleanup, people bring sheets that they drape around, and the midwives are pretty good about taking care of that.

In terms of what i'll do after delivery, that's why we stay at least 3 nights, so that we can rest with babe before the long travel home.

It isn't an ideal situation but i really don't want to be in a hospital, which seems to be the only other alternative.

 

[Geekylora]

It sounds like you have everything coming together then. If the staff doesn't support it don't tell them. All it would take is one person to put the brakes on your plan. Act as casual as possible and tell them it's a normal stay from out of town. If they ask questions about visitors or doctors coming in tell them it's just to make sure everything is okay with the baby.

Staying in the Jacuzzi until your water breaks sounds fine, just double check with your midwife. Chlorine and heat just cannot kill all of the bacteria in public hot tubs.
Glad you have a clean up plan too. I think that was a lot of peoples concern.


Definitely consider a nicer hotel with as much sound proofing as possible.
I would also recommend these things...

Going to view a room in person during the hotels normal business hours if at all possible and if you haven't done this already. Scope everything out so you can be 100% acquainted with the space.

Call and ask how busy or full the hotel is before checking in. Consider how many other guests will be there.

Double check to make sure your room is NOT connected to any other hotel room with either a door in the closet or any other entry points from outside. This has been the case with some places I've stayed at, and it would NOT be ideal.

If possible request a hotel room away from other rented rooms.

Ask for a higher level floor, or a room at the end of the hall that only has one neighboring room sharing a wall. If money allows think about renting both of those rooms to completely eliminate a bothered or curios neighbor. It might also give you a good excuse for having more people there. Just say they are traveling partners or something.

Some sounds could be masked or resemble sounds for just having sex... so if you're not loud it might not be a problem.


As always good luck for a safe and happy delivery for you and baby.

 

[Amygdala]

Could you get your own birth pool liner and use that in the jacuzzi? Even if you get out before your waters break, you don't want any bacteria or other nasties hanging out in your bits when your waters do break or if you happen to tear later. Sorry to be a bit graphic but I really think you need to be ultra vigilant with hygiene, especially if baby won't be at the hospital after to be kept an eye on.

For the record, I fully understand your desire for a natural and even a non-hospital birth but please be safe! You never know who used the room before you or what germs they brought in.

Have you looked into birthing centres in towns with a hospital and just staying in a cheap-ish hotel/motel nearby until you go into labour?

 

[Viola Payne]

I agree that i might have to bring my own birthing pool and avoid the jacuzzi altogether unfortunately.

After what happened last time giving birth in a hospital is not an option, unless there is a bona fide medical emergency that requires it.

As someone who works in the legal field i was able to observe first hand what happens when hospitals put their own legal interests ahead of what is best for mom and babe. For that reason I do not feel that me and babe would be safer in a hospital. I believe that we would be safer at a hotel room for sure. I hate to have to put it so bluntly since i'm sure it's controversial, but as a legal professional i could tell that they did things (against my will) not because they were best for me/baby but because they wanted to avoid exposure to liability, and in so doing in fact put me and baby at risk which did in fact result in damage. So no, there is no way that i believe we would be safer at a hospital, unless, of course, there was a bona fide medical emergency.

 

[Amygdala]

Was that last reply in response to me? If so, you misunderstand what I was suggesting. I'm not suggesting you go to a hospital but to a midwife-led birthing centre (in a town with a hospital for emergencies, since you said that's why you're going to a hotel near a hospital). I'm talking a place that is kitted out and sanitised to accommodate birthing mothers but without the medical surroundings of a hospital. Granted, there may not be one near, but you could go and stay in a motel or with a friend/relative close by for a while in advance.

I really do understand your concerns, I just think there must be an easier and safer option for you.

 

[Viola Payne]

We don't have birthing centres where i live.

 

[ace28]

I would really, really, really recommend against this. Hotels are DIRTY, for one thing. Think of all the people who've had sex in those beds before you- and you want your newborn baby in that environment? Hotels are also noisy. You will hear and be heard by others- not something you need to be thinking about during labor and birth. Third, you don't make mention of a midwife or any other professional. Home births can be done perfectly safely but only with a trained professional who knows how to care for a laboring woman and her baby and who knows when to call it and go to a hospital. Four, there is not a lot of ROOM in a hotel room. You might need to pace, move around, walk the floors, etc. You wouldn't be able to do this in that kind of environment.

Please, reconsider your plan.

 

[BabyCleo]

Just popping in here, I did have a question I dont think anyone bought up yet...

If you want to sneak past the hotel people than thats fine... but dont you think they would be curious when you walk in with a huge bump and walk out with a smaller bump and a baby?

Sorry, just wondering

 

[TriChick]

Do you have a back-up plan in case the hotel chooses to decline your reservation or subsequently evicts you from the room? While I'm ALL for out-of-hospital births, using deception to secure a birthing facility might end up causing a last-minute change of plans that you weren't prepared for. Hotels have policies in place to protect the interests of the majority of their guests. If things don't go according to plan and it creates a disturbance, there is a very real possibility that they will call 911 or ask you to relocate.

 

[AP]

^ I think exactly this. Whilst it's a wonderful idea and I found myself picking my imaginary birth hotel last night in my head, I do think that if you have to deceive people in order to do it ... Then you shouldn't be doing it.

 

[Amygdala]

So back to my earlier question: Don't you know anyone who lives in a place with a hospital (for emergencies) and who would let you use a room in their house? Parents, inlaws, siblings, friends?

 

[HBGirl]

I do think that if you have to deceive people in order to do it ... Then you shouldn't be doing it.

I agree with this 100%

 

[HoneyBee144]

Not sure if this is available where you are but when I did a residential driving course (completely different I know!) we rented a house for the week, kind of like a holiday home.

When I spoke to the midwife about birthing options for next time (I had a bad labour) she did say if it's a home birth they bring everything and clean everything up afterwards so don't think thats too much of a problem. Just thought a house might be a bit quieter location wise and as others say it's kind of risky lying to the hotel.

Can completely understand your reasoning though and hope it all works out for you

 

[Viola Payne]

Per previous posts there will be professionals there.

I'm not to worried about the deception part sincere first concern is my baby, not the hotel.

It's a really swanky hotel with a one bedroom suite. These places specialize in privacy so I'm expecting decent soundproofing.

Lots of people do this! Especially in the US where people can't afford 15k for a hospital birth.

I really don't agree that hotels are that dangerous nor that a baby will automatically be in danger if he's in a hotel.

Thanks for all the replies

 

[Viola Payne]

Please don't try to talk me out of it anymore. I was more looking for ideas on how to address specific issues that might come up, not for people to try to scare me out of it. I know your opinions, thanks!

 

[sue_88]

Of course first concern is your baby, but being thrown out of a hotel because you're being a nusience and causing noise pollution might just lead you to be having your baby on the street.....which isn't going to be fun is it?!

Really really don't understand this at all. I'm glad I don't own that hotel!

 

[TriChick]

E

Please don't try to talk me out of it anymore. I was more looking for ideas on how to address specific issues that might come up, not for people to try to scare me out of it. I know your opinions, thanks!

We addressed those specifically,as well as brought up VERY valid concerns that you may not have thought of originally. If the honest reality of the situation is "trying to scare you out of it", that's not the fault of the poster. Bottom line, you may not be concerned about the hotel's policy, but it's their property and their establishment. I hope everything works out in your favor, but I would have a SOLID backup plan.

P.S. Not sure if this has been addressed earlier in the thread, but was it your midwife's suggestion that you deceive the hotel, or are they aware that they would need to sneak around?

 

[AP]

Don't get me wrong Viola, I think it's a lovely idea in theory but disrespectful to the hotel and it's staff and residents.