Hi everyone,44 and pregnant,need some bump buddies

[Ruth2307]

Thanks a lot for all your well wishes. This morning it was not good news. No matter how hard you try to prepare yourself you are never quite ready are you? Despite my best intentions of conditioning my mind over the last two weeks to believe that it was all over hearing those words 'this pregnancy isn't going anywhere I'm afraid' was still so sad. There was a tiny part of me that was still holding out hope.

I kept it together remarkably well during the scan, with the chat with the Dr about my 'options' afterwards and then when I was booked for the EPRC (or whatever it's called) which takes place on Wednesday 29th. Now I'm at home and the enormity of everything that's happened has hit me like a train and I cannot stop crying. Everytime I close my eyes I keep seeing the screen with the sac and my tiny baby inside. She showed me the 'blue' areas where there were no blood vessels (my womb was 'red' indicating live tissue) and explained to me that this is where you would see a heartbeat but of course there wasn't one. The edge of the sac was also very ragged (instead of smooth) and that was irregular but she didn't know why that was.

When I met the F2 who booked me in for the EPRC I had to sign so many forms including one agreeing to have the tissue cremated after a blessing from the Chapel. In some ways I was comforted by this because I knew that the hospital team acknowleges that no matter how tiny, it was still a life and what will be removed from me on Wednesday isn't just clinical waste.

Once again, for those of you who have been through this (never mind more than once) I salute you. For those of you who haven't I pray with all my heart that you never ever do. I can safely say that this is the saddest and most painful thing that's ever happened to me in my entire life and I just want it to all go away.

 

[Storm1jet2]

Ok so got my results and I feel sick to the stomach ,am not totally sure of my dates but wen the blood was taken I was between 6-7 weeks ,my results were 16887,am so sure this isn't good

Did you just get the results? Did they not provide any advice as to if they were good, bad or indifferent?

The receptionist just said they were satisfactory,

Ok satisfactory should be ok? Don't panic - it won't help. What were you hoping for?

 

[Macwooly]

Ok so got my results and I feel sick to the stomach ,am not totally sure of my dates but wen the blood was taken I was between 6-7 weeks ,my results were 16887,am so sure this isn't good

Did you just get the results? Did they not provide any advice as to if they were good, bad or indifferent?

The receptionist just said they were satisfactory,

Honest please don't worry the results are in the normal range for when the bloods were taken I know it is easily said not to worry but it won't help beanie Praying for you and beanie daily

 

[Desperado167]

Ok so got my results and I feel sick to the stomach ,am not totally sure of my dates but wen the blood was taken I was between 6-7 weeks ,my results were 16887,am so sure this isn't good

Did you just get the results? Did they not provide any advice as to if they were good, bad or indifferent?

The receptionist just said they were satisfactory,

Ok satisfactory should be ok? Don't panic - it won't help. What were you hoping for?

At least double that,Just don't know wot to expect now,

 

[Macwooly]

Thanks a lot for all your well wishes. This morning it was not good news. No matter how hard you try to prepare yourself you are never quite ready are you? Despite my best intentions of conditioning my mind over the last two weeks to believe that it was all over hearing those words 'this pregnancy isn't going anywhere I'm afraid' was still so sad. There was a tiny part of me that was still holding out hope.

I kept it together remarkably well during the scan, with the chat with the Dr about my 'options' afterwards and then when I was booked for the EPRC (or whatever it's called) which takes place on Wednesday 29th. Now I'm at home and the enormity of everything that's happened has hit me like a train and I cannot stop crying. Everytime I close my eyes I keep seeing the screen with the sac and my tiny baby inside. She showed me the 'blue' areas where there were no blood vessels (my womb was 'red' indicating live tissue) and explained to me that this is where you would see a heartbeat but of course there wasn't one. The edge of the sac was also very ragged (instead of smooth) and that was irregular but she didn't know why that was.

When I met the F2 who booked me in for the EPRC I had to sign so many forms including one agreeing to have the tissue cremated after a blessing from the Chapel. In some ways I was comforted by this because I knew that the hospital team acknowleges that no matter how tiny, it was still a life and what will be removed from me on Wednesday isn't just clinical waste.

Once again, for those of you who have been through this (never mind more than once) I salute you. For those of you who haven't I pray with all my heart that you never ever do. I can safely say that this is the saddest and most painful thing that's ever happened to me in my entire life and I just want it to all go away.

So sorry hun I really have no words but pray that you get healing and feel peace soon

 

[Desperado167]

Ruth,Am so so sorry Hun,I know at the minute the pain is just too hard to bear but I know with love support and time u will start to feel betterNo- one can understand how empty and alone u feel now and i hope u never have to feel like this again,you will never forget your baby and they will always live on in your heart,Give yourself time to heal,wish I cud do something more to help u ,please lean on us for love and support,love and prayers,

 

[Ruth2307]

Ruth,Am so so sorry Hun,I know at the minute the pain is just too hard to bear but I know with love support and time u will start to feel betterNo- one can understand how empty and alone u feel now and i hope u never have to feel like this again,you will never forget your baby and they will always live on in your heart,Give yourself time to heal,wish I cud do something more to help u ,please lean on us for love and support,love and prayers,

I don't know what I would have done without all of you lovely ladies over the last 3 months - you have already done so much for me. I couldn't have asked for more.

 

[newmarriedgal]

Thanks a lot for all your well wishes. This morning it was not good news. No matter how hard you try to prepare yourself you are never quite ready are you? Despite my best intentions of conditioning my mind over the last two weeks to believe that it was all over hearing those words 'this pregnancy isn't going anywhere I'm afraid' was still so sad. There was a tiny part of me that was still holding out hope.

I kept it together remarkably well during the scan, with the chat with the Dr about my 'options' afterwards and then when I was booked for the EPRC (or whatever it's called) which takes place on Wednesday 29th. Now I'm at home and the enormity of everything that's happened has hit me like a train and I cannot stop crying. Everytime I close my eyes I keep seeing the screen with the sac and my tiny baby inside. She showed me the 'blue' areas where there were no blood vessels (my womb was 'red' indicating live tissue) and explained to me that this is where you would see a heartbeat but of course there wasn't one. The edge of the sac was also very ragged (instead of smooth) and that was irregular but she didn't know why that was.

When I met the F2 who booked me in for the EPRC I had to sign so many forms including one agreeing to have the tissue cremated after a blessing from the Chapel. In some ways I was comforted by this because I knew that the hospital team acknowleges that no matter how tiny, it was still a life and what will be removed from me on Wednesday isn't just clinical waste.

Once again, for those of you who have been through this (never mind more than once) I salute you. For those of you who haven't I pray with all my heart that you never ever do. I can safely say that this is the saddest and most painful thing that's ever happened to me in my entire life and I just want it to all go away.

oh Ruth, I'm so sorry. I was wondering about you earlier and my heart is sad after reading what you are going through. I hope you can find some peace soon - as hard as that may be, it is comforting the hospital is treating your little angel with respect and a blessing. Sending you many prayers and

 

[Lyvid]

I'm so very sorry Ruth. Was hoping and praying that all would be ok for you. I hope you find peace soon. We'll be here for you to lean on.

 

[Storm1jet2]

My heart breaks for you Ruth honey it really does - so so so so sorry

 

[Lyvid]

Desperado, happy belated anniversary!

Don't worry yourself about the numbers. As Wooly said, they are totally in the normal range and they aren't even at the very bottom. I know it's easier said than done but you have to stay positive and try not to worry beanie.

 

[Desperado167]

Storm lyvid and wooly Thank u for reassuring me,I really don't think I could cope with losing another baby,scan on Thursday,please god let there be a heartbeat ,

 

[kosh]

Thanks a lot for all your well wishes. This morning it was not good news. No matter how hard you try to prepare yourself you are never quite ready are you? Despite my best intentions of conditioning my mind over the last two weeks to believe that it was all over hearing those words 'this pregnancy isn't going anywhere I'm afraid' was still so sad. There was a tiny part of me that was still holding out hope.

I kept it together remarkably well during the scan, with the chat with the Dr about my 'options' afterwards and then when I was booked for the EPRC (or whatever it's called) which takes place on Wednesday 29th. Now I'm at home and the enormity of everything that's happened has hit me like a train and I cannot stop crying. Everytime I close my eyes I keep seeing the screen with the sac and my tiny baby inside. She showed me the 'blue' areas where there were no blood vessels (my womb was 'red' indicating live tissue) and explained to me that this is where you would see a heartbeat but of course there wasn't one. The edge of the sac was also very ragged (instead of smooth) and that was irregular but she didn't know why that was.

When I met the F2 who booked me in for the EPRC I had to sign so many forms including one agreeing to have the tissue cremated after a blessing from the Chapel. In some ways I was comforted by this because I knew that the hospital team acknowleges that no matter how tiny, it was still a life and what will be removed from me on Wednesday isn't just clinical waste.

Once again, for those of you who have been through this (never mind more than once) I salute you. For those of you who haven't I pray with all my heart that you never ever do. I can safely say that this is the saddest and most painful thing that's ever happened to me in my entire life and I just want it to all go away.

so so sorry ruth
we're here for you

 

[kosh]

Ok so got my results and I feel sick to the stomach ,am not totally sure of my dates but wen the blood was taken I was between 6-7 weeks ,my results were 16887,am so sure this isn't good

those values are totally normal!

weeks since LMP mIU/mL
3 5 – 50
4 5 – 426
5 18 – 7,340
6 1,080 – 56,500
7 – 8 7,650 – 229,000
9 – 12 25,700 – 288,000
13 – 16 13,300 – 254,000
17 – 24 4,060 – 165,400
25 – 40 3,640 – 117,000

 

[Desperado167]

Kosh I stupidly sat and worked out from my last hcg level and i was doubling it every three days so I guessed it shud be about 40,000,I wish I had never gone for the test as I begged the doc to do it ,now I am a Nervous wreck ,thank u for the info ,really appreciate it Hun,

 

[Lyvid]

Couple of things I just read:

In about 85% of normal pregnancies, the hCG level will double every 48 - 72 hours. As you get further along in pregnancy and the hCG level gets higher, the time it takes to double can increase to about every 96 hours.

Caution must be used in making too much of hCG numbers. A normal pregnancy may have low hCG levels and result in a perfectly healthy baby. The results from an ultrasound after 5 - 6 weeks gestation are much more accurate than using hCG numbers.

Hoping this can ease your mind. It could take 4 days for yours to double, or you might be in the 15% of "normal" pregnancies for which it does not double every 48-72 hours. Don't you wish there was a home U/S machine like you can get the doppler now LOL! Hang in there hun, I'm sure Thursday will show that everything is just fine!

 

[Macwooly]

Lyvid is correct with her numbers and not every pregnancy will have HCG doubling every 48 hours for some it will be every 96 hours

Try to forget the numbers and listen to your body and beanie until Thursday when I pray your worries are put to bed and your tough little sticky beanie will be showing you a super strong unmissable heart beat

 

[Desperado167]

Lyvid kosh and wooly ,Thank u so so much from the bottom of my heart for taking the time to settle my shattered nerves,I really am not going to worry now,ice-cream bought and Chinese ordered in for dinner,bring on Thursday,

 

[kosh]

Kosh I stupidly sat and worked out from my last hcg level and i was doubling it every three days so I guessed it shud be about 40,000,I wish I had never gone for the test as I begged the doc to do it ,now I am a Nervous wreck ,thank u for the info ,really appreciate it Hun,

what were your initial values and when were they taken?

 

[kosh]

Couple of things I just read:

In about 85% of normal pregnancies, the hCG level will double every 48 - 72 hours. As you get further along in pregnancy and the hCG level gets higher, the time it takes to double can increase to about every 96 hours.

yes, I was going to say that too!
i know it's not easy but try not to pay too much attention to the numbers. how are you feeling in general?
try and stay calm