July/August IUIs

[Ltruns33]

Thank you! Good luck to you as well this cycle!

 

[Prayingforno1]

Good morning everyone a bit of an emotional morning for me first off I can feel af will be showing at some point today. DH also had to do culture today to confirm no bacteria b4 our iui session. For the first time he shared with me how difficult it is to do these test semen analysis, culture etc he has tears in his eyes and of course I broke down when I saw this because he always tries to be strong for me and he never expressed his feelings like this. OMG ttc is so easy for some while others such as my cousin who I went out to lunch with this weekend shares that she was not even trying and got pregnant. I wanted to just scream out that well I have been trying nearly 4 years and still nothing so please stop bragging. This journey can be oh so hard and the various treatments, meds, tests difficult to go through. I will remain encouraged that when I am holding my little one in my arms our tears, multiple doctor visits, and tests will all be worth it.

 

[Babywhisperer]

I took a test today...neg. I was going to wait but I had this weird dull ache on my right side. Also no brown spotting which I typically get sometimes up to a week before af.

There is still time. If it turns out to be a bfn maybe we can be IVF buddies

 

[beaglemom]

Lt Runs - I am so sorry the IUI did not work. It is hard to feel like time after time all we do is fail. I am doing one cycle medicated no IUI...just because insurance will pay & I have leftover meds. Then the next cycle will be IVF. I think through all this it is very important to find outlets for your anger, frustration, & stress. Try to engulf yourself in something positive...I personally find great relief & peace just being with my husband. As unrealistic & annoying as it may sound, do not give up hope. IVF is an amazing option. The odds are about 50-70% depending on the process you decide. I used to be so afraid of it. But now I am embracing it. I will be a mother one day...no doubt. And you will, too. I highly suggest doing some research in to IVF. Find some articles online, go through som IVF threads, get some books from the library. It made me feel so much better after doing my own research. Def talk to your dr about it. Get the info from them & the price list. Take that home & take some time to really let it all sink in. Get educated. I promise you, it will make you start to feel so much better about the process.

 

[beaglemom]

I took a test today...neg. I was going to wait but I had this weird dull ache on my right side. Also no brown spotting which I typically get sometimes up to a week before af.

There is still time. If it turns out to be a bfn maybe we can be IVF buddies

Maybe so...I started to spot yesterday. I have a feeling it will be coming today...I do not feel any major symptoms or cramping...but I think maybe all these months of meds has made my cycle a bit off. I am hoping my October cycle will begin my IVF journey.

 

[Babywhisperer]

Catch up time!
Ok, first let me say I have been on a week(ish) unintentional break because work got so busy and because I got bad news friday at work and didn't really have time to process it between travelling to a football game with my team, and a xc meet the next day. I found out on friday that despite the best follicles, great endo lining, a perfectly timed IUI, great sperm (105 million post wash) and great tww progesterone support+ no running .. our 2nd IUI still failed. There are no words for me still. It hit me SO hard. sooo hard. Its taken me a week to really process it. I felt like it was a miracle IUI anyways, like a sign from God that there was hope. We barely had time to do the IUI but got it done the Saturday before school. I saw a RAINBOW on my way into the IUI and it was a year to the date from our miscarriage (I'm not one for signs, but a RAINBOW?!).. I just felt like if we are ever going to have good chances that was it. SO here's the bad first. I feel angry, empty, broken, ripped up, hopeless and cheated. I feel like God has tricked us, hurt us, and abandoned us. Any time of the day I am not overcome by the feeling of emptiness is when I am faking it, or surpressing it. I feel like it's never going to happen. I feel like we are destined to be childless. We do not want to adopt after seeing all the issues kids in our schools with crappy parents and teen moms face, we are not interested in that. I just feel like my uterus should be ripped out because it's worthless no matter how healthy the tests say it is. There's a lot more ugliness and hurt in my heart but I don't want it to scare y'all. haha.

So here's the good(ish). My doctor called me after hours, on his own time on Friday night. I know everyone in the clinic was sad for me. I know they thought I had good chances and I feel like I am blessed to have nurses and doctors who are upset to give me bad news. He basically said he looked over my past two iui's and the cancelled one and all my bloodwork from my past two annuals AND my hubbys four semen analysises/urologist reports. We are unexplained. No PCOS. NO ovarian reserve issues. No poor quality sperm. Every IUI has had more than one follicle, great endometrium lining and over 100 million sperm. Nothing adds up to us not being pregnant. He called to tell me that he encourages patients with unexplained to try 3 IUIs but that if we wanted to move onto IVF he understands. I am meeting with him on the 23rd. We are cleansing from fertility stuff this month. I am grieving this month. I am running a half marathon this month. I am trying to realize the reality of a childless life this month. The roller coaster of fertility treatments has broken my spirit.

I am not going to leave this post even though we have no "next step" planned, because I look forward to all the good that y'all have to offer. I am sorry SAKS left, but I have not felt any cattiness or cliqueishness. I am sorry I haven't had any advice or anything to give anyone, but I am barely keeping my head above water with work, and emotionally too. One day I hope to be stronger and not be so needy to y'all and to those in my life. I am encouraged by all of your journeys, and happy for your success Byrnchild I wish you a very healthy pregnancy!


To those that have or will move onto IVF I hope to be there one day. I will be talking to my doctor about if we even have a point of doing IVF in the future. I can't fathom right now why I would want to try something so much more invasive, expensive and time consuming when nothing else has worked and we've almost been trying for 3 years. It doesn't seem to be a good choice because I feel like we'd do it, and then our good old odds would be against us. I just know it wouldn't work and I'd be devastated again. I'm not usually this negative, I promise. In real life I'm a strong leader and head coach of 150 student athletes and I love them dearly and passionately push them to excellence. I am a extrovert who loves doing things for people and a person of strong faith. I say that just to say I promise I am not a downer. I just had to get all the sadness and negativity off my chest. I felt like after my last IUI failed I might as well have been told I can't ever have kids. So I needed to process that and hopefully move on now. Whew.

I will catch up with more of you soon! WElcome to the newbies and I hope I didn't scare anyone away!

I am so sorry you feel this way, but can totally empathize. In a normal unmedicated cycle we can be disappointed, but taking the time, tests, and talking about it can really place a lot of anticipation and hope. The added hormones just amplify all of our emotions. You have every right to grieve, to be sad, angry, frustrated and to take your time. That in itself is a cleansing. Come to terms with your experience and make your next decision after you have had time to process it all. I feel your pain and hope you know you are not alone.

The great thing about IVF is the increased chances we have. My Dr said it is 2-3 times more successful. They can control a lot more, and see up close what they are working with. If it's egg quality they can chose the best. We have decided if this cycle doesn't work we will be doing IVF. I am nervous if we spend all that money and it doesn't work I will feel hopeless, but you never know what life has in store for you. Sometimes things don't happen when we want, but they do happen eventually. I truly think stress has a large part in this, and your schedule is very busy with a lot of commitments. I pray you and everyone on here gets their bfp soon. In the meantime know I am thinking of you.

Saks, if by any chance you are still reading this thread, I hope you are well. Hopefully you were just more sensitive while going thru this becasue I have not seen any of the behavior you mentioned. But your feelings are your feelings, I just hope you know nothing is intentional on this thread to be catty.

Afm, not much to report, have noon appt for u/s and b/w. I hope those follies are growing and I haven't surged bc he gave me off Sat & Sun from coming in and lowered my dose to 75. I am exhausted today. We had people over Sat and I shopped, cleaned, prepped, cooked and yesterday drove to NJ for my SIL's baby shower. When I saw her I immediately welled up with tears. I am going to be an Aunt for the 1st time and I couldn't be happier for them. It was 5hrs of driving yesterday and we brought the baby.....and of course he had a blowout all the way up to his ribs. What a mess! Thankfully I brought another outfit. Of course this never happens but on a 3hr car ride and away from home. Poor guy.

Thinking of all you ladies. Come on BFPs!!!

 

[raelynn]

Ltruns - I am so sorry that you are going through this. What a heartbreak to have such a perfect seeming cycle and then it not working. It is absolutely understandable to need to be angry, grieve, cry, etc. over this. This journey that we all are on is such a difficult one and I just pray that your break with be just what you need and you can come back with some hope and will eventually see that BFP. I'm so glad you'll be sticking around because I too am so glad we have such a supportive group here.

Praying - I'm sorry that your hubby is having a rough time too. It is so hard to see our spouses suffer through this as well. Hopefully AF is not on her way for you. And I agree, it seems some people just pop out babies. I have a family member who has six kids now and she doesn't even watch over any of them when we're together for holidays. They all run wild and get into stuff and it seems like why can people who don't even care have kids so easily and those of us that want them so badly have such trouble having them.

Beaglemom - I'm so hoping your non IUI cycle works for you. Wouldn't that be such a great surprise. If not, it seems like you have done some great research around IVF. It gives me hope if we end up on that route again.

Babywhisperer - It always seems that the worst happens with kids when you're away from home. My daughter got sick for the first time while we were away and out at a restaurant. She threw up all over herself and I had to try and clean her the best I could in the bathroom. Thank goodness for a change of clothes! Hoping this cycle goes well for you too!

AFM - I'm finishing up my clomid tonight and go in for my follicle check on Thursday. I'm guessing not much will be happening yet since my follicles are slow to grow. I don't know why I worry so much but after having a cancelled cycle and then a negative and knowing we only have 2 more chances with the same donor, I'm panicking a little. I also have a ton of added stress from this house mess from the broken sewage pipe. They're digging up our yard today to replace the pipe and they dug 10 feet down and still can't find it. Now they're going to have to rip up the sidewalk too. Can't catch a break it seems.

Hopefully we'll all get some good news soon. It sounds like we need it!!

 

[Ltruns33]

Lt Runs - I am so sorry the IUI did not work. It is hard to feel like time after time all we do is fail. I am doing one cycle medicated no IUI...just because insurance will pay & I have leftover meds. Then the next cycle will be IVF. I think through all this it is very important to find outlets for your anger, frustration, & stress. Try to engulf yourself in something positive...I personally find great relief & peace just being with my husband. As unrealistic & annoying as it may sound, do not give up hope. IVF is an amazing option. The odds are about 50-70% depending on the process you decide. I used to be so afraid of it. But now I am embracing it. I will be a mother one day...no doubt. And you will, too. I highly suggest doing some research in to IVF. Find some articles online, go through som IVF threads, get some books from the library. It made me feel so much better after doing my own research. Def talk to your dr about it. Get the info from them & the price list. Take that home & take some time to really let it all sink in. Get educated. I promise you, it will make you start to feel so much better about the process.

Thank you for the reassurance about IVF. I think you are right, it takes soe sinking in.. you just never think when you start, Oh, I'll probably need to do IVF to have kids. Thanks again for the insight!

 

[Babywhisperer]

Quick update. Tons of ewcm and I am supposed to trigger tonight. I have 3 follies all 17-17.5. Estradiol was 511 and LH2. IUI is Wed. We will bd tonight I've never had so much ewcm in my life. I asked if the follies were too sma she said they want to see at least 16 before they trigger. Does this seem too small for mature eggs?

Starting to cramp a little and I'm officially the horniest human being on earth. Hello hormones!!! How does the estradiol look to you ladies?

 

[beaglemom]

All good signs for perfect baby making timing.

My follicles were around 17-18 when I was told to trigger...sounds like good numbers to me.

 

[Babywhisperer]

All good signs for perfect baby making timing.

My follicles were around 17-18 when I was told to trigger...sounds like good numbers to me.

I wonder why this cycle all the ewcm. It's unusual for me.

Crossing fingers but not expecting much.

 

[raelynn]

Estradiol numbers sound good too - babywhisperer! Mine was at 300-something with just 2 follicles right before I ovulated.

 

[Babywhisperer]

Estradiol numbers sound good too - babywhisperer! Mine was at 300-something with just 2 follicles right before I ovulated.

Good morning ladies. I triggered, we bd, and I went to sleep and slept very hard. I'm a little achy on my right where I have 2 follies this time. Dh goes for his part at 8:30 tomorrow and he wants to go to Bikram tonight. He was so dehydrated last night it took a while to um, get things going to bd

I told him he shouldn't be dehydrated the night before IUI, do you ladies agree? Or am I being silly?

 

[Prayingforno1]

Estradiol numbers sound good too - babywhisperer! Mine was at 300-something with just 2 follicles right before I ovulated.

Good morning ladies. I triggered, we bd, and I went to sleep and slept very hard. I'm a little achy on my right where I have 2 follies this time. Dh goes for his part at 8:30 tomorrow and he wants to go to Bikram tonight. He was so dehydrated last night it took a while to um, get things going to bd

I told him he shouldn't be dehydrated the night before IUI, do you ladies agree? Or am I being silly?

Not sure about the dehydration before IUI but I wanted to just wish you GL on your cycle and hope to be reading your bfp within the next few weeks

 

[Babywhisperer]

estradiol numbers sound good too - babywhisperer! Mine was at 300-something with just 2 follicles right before i ovulated.

good morning ladies. I triggered, we bd, and i went to sleep and slept very hard. I'm a little achy on my right where i have 2 follies this time. Dh goes for his part at 8:30 tomorrow and he wants to go to bikram tonight. He was so dehydrated last night it took a while to um, get things going to bd

I told him he shouldn't be dehydrated the night before iui, do you ladies agree? Or am i being silly?

not sure about the dehydration before iui but i wanted to just wish you gl on your cycle and hope to be reading your bfp within the next few weeks

thanks lady. Crossing fingers

 

[Prayingforno1]

GM all decided to stay home today and relax instead of going into work, I've been feeling a bit overwhelmed lately. No AF yet but I swear from Friday I keep feeling like she's right there! Took HPT Sunday (11dpo) BFN so I know I'm out this month.I wish she would just come so I can start my 2nd attempt at IUI #1. Hope everyone has a good day and waiting patiently for some more BFP announcements from you all!

 

[Babywhisperer]

GM all decided to stay home today and relax instead of going into work, I've been feeling a bit overwhelmed lately. No AF yet but I swear from Friday I keep feeling like she's right there! Took HPT Sunday (11dpo) BFN so I know I'm out this month.I wish she would just come so I can start my 2nd attempt at IUI #1. Hope everyone has a good day and waiting patiently for some more BFP announcements from you all!

You're not out until the witch shows! Come on kick start the BFPs!

 

[Prayingforno1]

Thanks babywhisperer i still have a glimmer of hope

 

[beaglemom]

He DEF needs to be hydrated!!! It is actually a good thing to increase fluid intake overall I have heard.

So another neg for me today & the spotting is more red...so def coming. Hopefully full on tonight so I can do my u/s tomorrow. I am in class for work in the are of my dr. So would be nice not to have to travel back again this week.

Also I got confirmation my grant app was received...SO RELIEVED!!!

 

[Babywhisperer]

He DEF needs to be hydrated!!! It is actually a good thing to increase fluid intake overall I have heard.

So another neg for me today & the spotting is more red...so def coming. Hopefully full on tonight so I can do my u/s tomorrow. I am in class for work in the are of my dr. So would be nice not to have to travel back again this week.

Also I got confirmation my grant app was received...SO RELIEVED!!!

Sorry if it is af coming. But how awesome about the grant! What is next for that? Is it a long wait?