Life after Loss Support Group........All Welcome :)

[Hellylou]

Hi Gemma...

Well, that sounds horribly similar to our follow up, and a lot of ladies' appts here too. So often it's just a case of 'we have no idea but it shouldn't happen again'. In some ways that is reassuring, knowing there is no physical cause, but terrifying in that you don't know if you might be in the same situation some time in the future, god forbid!

I know that PPROM caused my loss with no medical reason for it, but I think I had an infection somewhere. Whether that came before the rupture, causing it, or after as a result of it, no one knows, but I had high temp a week before the waters started leaking, and then the pains started.

I think it's just one of those accidents of nature, unlikely to be repeated. For whatever reason, something went wrong in there. It's such a delicate process it's a miracle when it goes right, when you think about it!

Try to take this as a positive step forward. You know that medically there is no reason why it happened, therefore there is no reason why you wouldn't have a perfectly successful pregnancy next time. Just like some women can have an early loss, or several, followed by a successful pregnancy. Something went wrong in a very complex process but it's not likely to happen again.

 

[Bride2b]

Wow... Is there any chance you can have a follow up appointment when you have had time to digest all this?

I would have further questions myself x

I absolutely didn't go into labour, they had to really force my body to let go of that wee dead girl, I had been holding onto her for five weeks

So it certainly sounds to me like you went into labour, if your waters broke, hmmm honey x I don't know how that would make me feel I must say I Really, Really am feeling for you today x x x x

I can do, the consultant was really nice. There are a few tests to come back from the blood I had taken on 28th Dec, but he said these are likely to be clear too as the other tests that have come back would indicate something as the ones to come back are sort of 'further analysis' of these.

I think it goes as far as it happened, for no apparent reason and its not likely to happen again. The pains I got on the run up to delivery were very similar to what I had felt before my waters broke - just a bit more painful. I dont know if it was him moving about in there on something making it uncomfortable....and once my waters broke it was certainly more uncomfortable as I could feel him move (the mw said its because there was no water so it could hurt). I guess its just difficult that he was alive & kicking when I went in....but for some reason had a shitty sac that didnt want to keep him in there!

As Helen says sometimes & for lots of women there seems to be no answer for PPROM. Just got to hope and pray it was an awful one time accident & that it never happens again.

I just want to be pregnant again, and will try after this cycle. I'm glad that we are in the position to go for it. Its kind of bitter sweet, but would do anything to have my baby back x

 

[jennijunni]

Had the baby already died before you delivered him?? I only ask because that is what happened with me both times. The babies were fine, and then they just died, and then I found out when I had some bleeding. With #2, my membranes did rupture, and I knew something was wrong, but the baby had already died. And they found nothing wrong with them either, and we thought all would be well with #2, but it was not. I will be taking asprin and progesterone, JIC. Maybe you should think about doing the same the next time. It is so hard not knowing. I wish I did have something wrong with me, so we could have some control. It is so stressful. I hate not having answers. I am sorry that you did not get all the answers you need. Hugs!!!

 

[jennijunni]

oops, posted at the same time.

 

[Bride2b]

oh, what are the best pre conception vitamins to take? I didnt take any last time...as it was all too confusing! I took folic acid & am taking them again. Do I need to take seperate folic acid with prenatals or does it depend on the brand I take?x

 

[feeble]

Glad your so calm about it x I think that's really positive and I think it might be because you know in your heart of hearts that your next baby will be in your arms for life x

 

[Hellylou]

oh, what are the best pre conception vitamins to take? I didnt take any last time...as it was all too confusing! I took folic acid & am taking them again. Do I need to take seperate folic acid with prenatals or does it depend on the brand I take?x

I took pregnacare pre conception vitamins which have folic acid in them. I was taking them all of last cycle.

 

[Bride2b]

No Jenni, he had a heartbeat when I went in and was moving about all day quite happily! I think he only died in the process of labour as I asked the mw this after I delivered him & she said the stress of labour would have done it!

I asked him about progesterone - he didnt seem to think it would be necessary as there were not any problems with the placenta. He also said without there being a problem he wouldnt want to do anything that could potentially introduce infection if there wasnt any need to have things like progesterone. I can see his point.x

 

[Bride2b]

Glad your so calm about it x I think that's really positive and I think it might be because you know in your heart of hearts that your next baby will be in your arms for life x

I am quite calm! I am pretty laid back anyway - which I guess is a good thing! I just hope to god your right.x

Thanks Helen...I will have a look where is best to get them. Do you stop taking them after BFP....I guess you do & then go onto the pregnant pregnacare ones? Do you know if the pregnant pregnacare ones have folic acid too. (Although I am about to have a look a them now on the internet!) x

 

[Nikki_d72]

I'm sorry you got no solid answers, Gemma. It unfortunately seems to be the case 9 times out of 10 with pPROM that no answers can be given, it does seem to be a bit of a medical anomaly. It was the same for us, except my swab for StrepB was + as was the placental tests, again there is no way of knowing whether the Strep ascended after the membrane rupture or was the cause of it. I've been promised internal cervical scans weekly from 10 weeks but he was not convinced on the benefit of swabs, I think I'll fight for swabs and you might want to push for weekly cervical checks if you can too. I know infection can cause discomfort in the uterus as they were asking me constantly while I was in hospital if I had any pain as they were worried about sepsis. I would have thought if that was the case for you though that it would have been picked up in your histology.

As for vitamins, I was told by my MW that most pregnancy multivits over here don't have enough folic in them and she prescribed me some, they are supposed to be 800ug (0.8mg) for best protection so check the labels. At the moment I take a normal multi + an extra folic acid tablet that takes me up to that recommended amount for the first 2 weeks of my cycle, and around OV and after I take a pregnancy multi + folic. I only do this though as the pregnancy ones here cost a small fortune here, otherwise I'd take them all the time. I think the main reason to not take a normal one through pregnancy is the inclusion of vitamin A, which can be toxic to a developing fetus in high doses. If I get pregnant I will include a high dose vitamin C as well as I have read some preliminary studies ponting to the possibility of vitamin C deficiency adding to the risk of pPROM, though the consultant checked my bloods and assured me I was not deficient, but there's no harm in taking Vit C, I was told up to 4000mg daily is fine in pregnancy but that's probably overkill. I'm sorry I can't be of more help honey, I read and read and searched after this happened to me, my consultant even gave me a peer review all about it that only doctors have access to and they all said much the same thing - in most cases there is no known cause - only known risk factors and once these have been discounted they are none the wiser.
xxx

 

[Bride2b]

Thats very odd that the prenatal vits there dont have enough folic acid in! I didnt know about Vitamin C....so I think I am going to stock up on prenatals and then definately take pregnancy vitamins next time.


How is everyone going with cycles/tww etc....its gone all quiet lately! xx

 

[Andypanda6570]

I am so sorry, I got no answers also. I know how you feel.
Ava died at 20 weeks no heartbeat. Her cells never grew so i will never know why she passed. It is a very difficult situation, but you just learn to live with it.
I wish you all the best for 2012 and everyone else. This has been a hard year for us all and we all need a little happiness.

I am 41 but my doctor said it would not happen again, it was a fluke.
It is very scary to me getting pregnant again, but it is more scary not to try.

Hope everyone is doing well..

XOXOXOXOOXOOXOX

 

[kiki04]

Nothing new to report here. Still no AF but I think I FINALLY ovulated which means I am guessing she will be here around Jan 20... now I have to wait and see BNB has been acting up bad for me lately. Like taking over 1 min to open a new page and its really deterring me from coming on cuz it pisses me off

 

[dnlfinker]

Nothing new to report here. Still no AF but I think I FINALLY ovulated which means I am guessing she will be here around Jan 20... now I have to wait and see BNB has been acting up bad for me lately. Like taking over 1 min to open a new page and its really deterring me from coming on cuz it pisses me off

Hi Krissy ,

I hope you will get your answers soon. I know how frustrating it can get , but hang in there , it will show up? Did u take anymore pregnancy test?


Natalie

 

[kiki04]

Yeah I took one yesterday and it was a bfn

 

[jojo23]

hey girls how is everyone???

just want to start by saying sorry for being MIA the last while. was so busy inn work over xmas and tired at the end of the day i just went to bed. then with all the family here at xmas and new year it was just mayhem! and to top it all off my internet keeps going down, a fault with the phone line but its only just fixed today!

so anyways said id come on in and catch up! how is everyone? any bfps since ive been gone girls?

im 17 weeks now can you believe it!!!? im waiting patiently for my next scan which isnt until feb 16th. i was really upset having to wait and dont hav money for a private scan but the 16th of feb last year was the day Lily was born sleeping so i think i might keep that appointment and take it as a sign that she'll be there watching over me and LO.

i thought i felt movement on and off the last couple of weeks but really nothing major to make me certain so im just hoping i feel somethin soon for some reassurance lol! i feel like a total lunatic lately still avent relaxed and learned to be calm and let fate work its magic!

hope everyone is really good and sorry again for no word xxxxxxxxxx

 

[ericacaca]

hey girls how is everyone???

just want to start by saying sorry for being MIA the last while. was so busy inn work over xmas and tired at the end of the day i just went to bed. then with all the family here at xmas and new year it was just mayhem! and to top it all off my internet keeps going down, a fault with the phone line but its only just fixed today!

so anyways said id come on in and catch up! how is everyone? any bfps since ive been gone girls?

im 17 weeks now can you believe it!!!? im waiting patiently for my next scan which isnt until feb 16th. i was really upset having to wait and dont hav money for a private scan but the 16th of feb last year was the day Lily was born sleeping so i think i might keep that appointment and take it as a sign that she'll be there watching over me and LO.

i thought i felt movement on and off the last couple of weeks but really nothing major to make me certain so im just hoping i feel somethin soon for some reassurance lol! i feel like a total lunatic lately still avent relaxed and learned to be calm and let fate work its magic!

hope everyone is really good and sorry again for no word xxxxxxxxxx

Wow! 17 weeks! Thats cool! I know what you mean about movement. I'm feeling some too - but don't want to say for definate, not until Thursday when we can hear heart beat for the first time with midwife - we've not had a 16 week appointment yet because midwife has been so busy!

I had today off with my back again! I just cried and cried and cried this morning because I couldnt get my socks on! I'm better now - I think its cus I overdid it at work yesterday. It'll be ok tomorrow as I'm at a different place and the class isnt as big and I don't have to go up or down stairs (I hope!)

Then I realised that this is the furthest I've even been pregnant. Little Eve left us when at 17 weeks and 6 days. It feels really wierd not having the same symptoms. Mixed emotions at the moment... but at least this little one in me is swimming around ok. And we'll find out for sure Thursday!

Erica x

 

[dnlfinker]

Hey guys ,

I am about to go to a baby shower for my coworker who was 4
weeks behind me . I am feeling really poo right now, like literally
shaking inside . This girl has been so nice to me all this time.she knew
what happened to me and came to check on me for the past few month
I dont know if I can go , i dont feel strong , I feel so bothered and shaken right now

 

[ericacaca]

Hey guys ,

I am about to go to a baby shower for my coworker who was 4
weeks behind me . I am feeling really poo right now, like literally
shaking inside . This girl has been so nice to me all this time.she knew
what happened to me and came to check on me for the past few month
I dont know if I can go , i dont feel strong , I feel so bothered and shaken right now

Oh hun If you REALLY can't go I'm sure she'll understand. You really don't have to go you know.... you need to deal with what you're going through before you do anything for anyone else. I know it sounds selfish but if you're going to be a mess please don't feel bad about not going. I'm sure others will understand too.

xxx

 

[dnlfinker]

Hey guys ,

I am about to go to a baby shower for my coworker who was 4
weeks behind me . I am feeling really poo right now, like literally
shaking inside . This girl has been so nice to me all this time.she knew
what happened to me and came to check on me for the past few month
I dont know if I can go , i dont feel strong , I feel so bothered and shaken right now

Oh hun If you REALLY can't go I'm sure she'll understand. You really don't have to go you know.... you need to deal with what you're going through before you do anything for anyone else. I know it sounds selfish but if you're going to be a mess please don't feel bad about not going. I'm sure others will understand too.

xxx

I must be so selfish I need just too raise my chin and go , I feel jelous, I should be the one holding my baby girl right now