Life after Loss Support Group........All Welcome :)

[dancareoi]

Hello all.

Hoping you ladies can help me.

I am 14 days into an irregular 28-35 day cycle and have the achy 'period' crampy pain on my left hand side. I have poas but line is very faint.

Usually, does the pain come before or after ov?

I'm new to all of this terminology, so sorry if I get stuff wrong. Never done the whole monitoring thing, as we had terrible probs getting pregnant both times and didn't need the stress.

It's now 5 months since we lost Sam, and we feel ready to try again. Although I do have a bit of weight to loose too, I have joined a slimming group to help.

Hope all are well.

Hi, over the years i have become more aware of how my body works. I have 3 children and have had two MMC.

I find the best indication of ovulation is large amounts of CM, really thick and stretchy, just like egg white a few times when you wipe. (sorry if TMI)

I find then I OV 2-4 days after this and always find that 2 weeks after I have the increased CM my AF starts!

When I have been trying, once I get the CM i start using an OV test and DTD from the day the CM arrives until day after OV test is positive. We used this method on my 2nd, 3rd and 4th pregnancies. Each time I became PG first time!!

Good luck

 

[Kelly9]

Today was a very hard day for me. My body is still not cooperating 8 weeks after the fact. I've been bleeding for 6.5 weeks out of the last 8 with only a few days in-between where I've had no spotting or bleeding at all. The stress of my body not working is taking it's toll and now that I've started spotting again after having just 2 days without any bleeding I think if it turns into another full flow that I'm going to go on birth control pills. I don't want to have to do this, I want more then anything to be pregnant again but I can't take the constant let down from my body every time I think it's going to fix it's self then doesn't.

I've been so cranky and moody and I'm taking out all my stress and anger on my husband and son and I hate myself for it. I just can't seem to stop doing it, something needs to change so if that something is taking the pill then so be it. My dream of holding another baby in my arms is just going to have to wait. Quiet frankly I just want to give up.

 

[collie_crazy]

Kelly I'm so sorry you are growing through this have you said to your doctor / ob that you are still bleeding?

I had a similar thing where I bled for 8 weeks with it sometimes stopping for a day or two then starting again then tapering off etc. I said to my doctor at 5 weeks and she swabbed for infection but it came back clear. Then at 8 weeks pp I heamorraged and lost over a pint and half of blood in minutes. I was rushed to hospital and after an internal scan they found I still had pieces of retained placenta that were becoming necrotic. I had no other symptoms like pain or cramping just the bleeding which is why they never thought about placenta being left behind. I had to have a D&C the next day to get the placenta out and my bleeding stopped almost immediately after that. 4 weeks later I fell pregnant and here I am 22 weeks later

So if you haven't already I would be contacting your doctor and or OB and asking for a scan. 8 weeks is a long time to put up with this!

 

[mhazzab]

Kelly I'm so sorry you are still having the bleeding. I think I said in another post to you I had it for 14 weeks so I know how hard it is. I was desperate for it to stop so I could start to TTC again and I kept getting my hopes up that it had stopped and then the next thing I was at the toilet and it was back again. I found it very hard to deal with. For me, it was just wacky hormones, but as collie says, hers was retained placenta so if you haven't been scanned it's probably best to arrange this just in case. I really hope it stops soon for you so you can make a start on trying for your rainbow x

 

[Bride2b]

Oh Kelly you poor thing, I would say get checked out too, the longer it goes on the harder it gets emotionally, I know how desperate you must be to get back on track so you can start ttc again. There is nothing like the desperation & need to be pregnant again. I really hope that if you do see a doctor or take the pill that it sorts everything out. xx

 

[Andypanda6570]

Kelly,
I am thinking of you

 

[dancareoi]

Today was a very hard day for me. My body is still not cooperating 8 weeks after the fact. I've been bleeding for 6.5 weeks out of the last 8 with only a few days in-between where I've had no spotting or bleeding at all. The stress of my body not working is taking it's toll and now that I've started spotting again after having just 2 days without any bleeding I think if it turns into another full flow that I'm going to go on birth control pills. I don't want to have to do this, I want more then anything to be pregnant again but I can't take the constant let down from my body every time I think it's going to fix it's self then doesn't.

I've been so cranky and moody and I'm taking out all my stress and anger on my husband and son and I hate myself for it. I just can't seem to stop doing it, something needs to change so if that something is taking the pill then so be it. My dream of holding another baby in my arms is just going to have to wait. Quiet frankly I just want to give up.

Kelly, I`m sure all the worrying and stressing can`t be helping either.

As one of the other ladies suggested, I really think you should see your doctor about this and get everything checked out properly.

Hope everything gets sorted out for you.

 

[Kelly9]

I've been to the docs many times and had a few scans, no evidence of retained pieces and I have no other symptoms of that plus Hannah's placenta was intact. I think it's my hormones, I had my blood taken to measure them so should be getting results this coming week. It could be my fistula but as of the last scan that was resolving and settling nicely. I can never have a D&C due to the fistula.

I haven't had any spotting since yesterday at 2pm so am keeping my fingers crossed it was just late ovulation spotting, though I've never had ov spotting before. I just need any bleeding to hold out for a couple more days. Ideally thursday would be best but I'll take anything after monday.

Thanks for the responses. I've just been so beat up lately and want things to go back to normal so we can move on with our plans for a frozen embryo transfer, I can't help but think that the world at least owes me a properly functioning body after everything.

 

[collie_crazy]

I hope this time it has stopped for you

 

[Kelly9]

I hope so to. I feel like most days I am barely holding it together and when I'm constantly reminded that my body is messed up I go over the edge and have a melt down, I had a melt down yesterday and ended up bawling on the phone to my MIL, it was horrible.

 

[dancareoi]

I hope so to. I feel like most days I am barely holding it together and when I'm constantly reminded that my body is messed up I go over the edge and have a melt down, I had a melt down yesterday and ended up bawling on the phone to my MIL, it was horrible.

So sorry you are having such a stressful time. Hopefully now things will start to settle down for you.

It`s so fustrating when you want something so much, but something out of your control is stopping you.

I know it`s easier said than done, but try to stop stressing out because it can`t be doing you any good. When you feel yourself getting stressed try taking some deep breaths, in through the nose, out through the mouth, or if that doesn`t work, try hitting something!!

Sending lots of hugs and best wishes your way

 

[Kelly9]

Well the witch not showing in the last couple of days has helped keep me calm, I haven't had any more spotting since the one day though my temp dropped today. So if I can just make it a few more days without bleeding I'll be happy.

 

[dancareoi]

Well the witch not showing in the last couple of days has helped keep me calm, I haven't had any more spotting since the one day though my temp dropped today. So if I can just make it a few more days without bleeding I'll be happy.

I`ll keep everything crossed for you.

 

[Kelly9]

I made it, it's nearly tuesday and no witch though had spotting again today. I am sick though just got over a cold and now have a bug cause I was throwing up

 

[dancareoi]

I made it, it's nearly tuesday and no witch though had spotting again today. I am sick though just got over a cold and now have a bug cause I was throwing up

It just seems to be one thing after another doesn`t it? I see to have got food poisoning. I have had a really really bad stomach for 24 hours now. I have lost 4 pounds in weight in one day and haven`t eaten in 24 hours, even the water i am drinking is going straight through me.

i said to my DH, I feel bad enough as it is, without having all this to put up with as well.

 

[Kelly9]

^ you sure it's food poisoning? I was up puking all night last night and had the runs very badly, I also lost 3 pounds or so overnight from fluid loss, I have a bug it's going around out here. I'm feeling a little better now 24 hours later but my stomach is still a little iffy. More spotting today it was pink then brown now nothing, Hopefully the witch comes by friday.

 

[dancareoi]

Could be a bug - feel a little better this morning, but still feel a bit iffy too. Have lost 6 pounds in 2 days.
I feel in a way this will have done my body good. I want to TTC again if DH agrees, but I needed to lose some weight. My body has had a detox the last couple of days.

`They` say everything happens for a reason, perhaps `they` are right! i wanted to TTC this month, but DH said no. However, just as well, as we would be having to try this week and i feel so yuk i wouldn`t have been able to, that combined with the loss of weight, which is what i wanted before TTC, perhaps `they` are right after all!!

Makes you wonder doesn`t it, perhaps someone out there is looking out for us. My mom used to say that your whole life is mapped out for you already and everything that happens is meant to happen.

i know sometimes it seems how could that possibly be so.

However, i had MMC in July 09. I then went on to have my beautiful little boy in May 2010. If I hadn`t had MMC my little boy would not be here today. I know i would have another child, but this adorable little person we have now, would not have been - makes you think doesn`t it?

 

[Kelly9]

It's worth a thought butni choose not to believe that everything happens for a reason my Hannah was taken from me for no good reason at all and I find it impossible to believe that any good will come out of her being taken to soon. ( I'm not offended by why you said so dont think that just sharing y thoughts)

I hope your hubby will get on board with ttc.

 

[dancareoi]

It's worth a thought butni choose not to believe that everything happens for a reason my Hannah was taken from me for no good reason at all and I find it impossible to believe that any good will come out of her being taken to soon. ( I'm not offended by why you said so dont think that just sharing y thoughts)

I hope your hubby will get on board with ttc.

I know what you mean, I can`t see any good reason why my little one was taken either.

I too hope hubby agrees to TTC. I think he might, because he knows how devasted I will be if he doesn`t agree.

We are waiting on an appoinment to see some professor to do some tests to see if we are likely to have any further problems. I think it will be a waste of time. There are no gentic reasons, because we already have 3 healthy children. It isn`t an incompetant cervix, because i have already had 3 kids.
i had blood staken for all the usual tests when I was PG and no abnormalities there. My hormone levels were tested when i had scan for DS and all was normal there.
So apart from the usual problems that come with my age(40) I can`t see the point.

If this guy says no reason not to try, hubby i think will agree.

there again, on the other habd, if this guy says don`t try really high chance you will have problems, obviously we won`t try again. I will be broken hearted, but i suppose it will be better than going through all this heartache again.

i think that is what worries me, that he will say not to try. the thought of trying is the only thing that is keeping me going!

 

[Kelly9]

I understand that, getting to my frozen embryo transfer is whats been keeping me going. I'm so close to it to and now the witch is just playing with me giving me spotting and no cycle. She'd better get here soon.