Moms of April/May/June 2010 babies thread! :)

[maybebaby3]

amy - i feel your pain owen had another terrible night yesterday i also have to go back to work full time here teachers are not allowed part time work and OH wouldn't hear of anything else other than full time anyway. my dad gave us some money from the sale of a flat he was left by his cousin in his will so i could take an extra year off but OH thinks the money is best in the bank rather than used for me to stay off. he thinks i just sit on my arse all day

sarah - glad u had a lovely anniversary! and glad steve bought you something nice!

katie - glad u r ok!!!

i am in a foul mood today! first dylan came to my bed and woke up the baby (he cant bear to see him sleeping!), then OH is still in bed now (as usual i know but still making my blood boil) plus i have started doing weight watchers today and am already craving chocolate! also i have 10kg to lose to get to my target weight, so about 2 stone oh and to top it off i went to bed about to blow a gasket as OH said i'm always complaining about being tired. on wednesdays i meet some friends for lunch and OH said yesterday that i am basically a bad mother for going out (dylan and erin go to my mum's, not like he looks after them or anything!!!) he said 'what mother of 3 goes out and sits on her arse spending money for hours on end'!!! i was so mad! he also said 'oh you dont complain about being tired on wednesdays do you'. i wanted to thump him! i just left the room and went to bed as i didnt feel like an argument but who is he to say these things when he is doing bugger all round the flat, is not working and sleeps in til at least midday, and then gets up and trains or just lies on the sofa!!! i dont think going out with my friends once a week is being a bad mother do you

 

[Frufru]

Sarah - I am glad you had a nice annniversary, the changing bag sounds lovely. I did not get any of my jobs done on account of Joni being poorly but most of the jobs have been waiting since before she was born so they can wait a bit longer

Maybebaby - He slept on a tile floor I would have let the kids wake him up by drawing on him I am sorry you had another tough night It is a bugger that you don;t have a partime option for work. Between my savings and some rather drastic lifestyle changes/cutbacks I can just about afford to take the last 3 months unpaid portion of my mat leave off. If I thought I could afford to give up work completely I would but it would just be that bit to tight.
Going out with your friends is not a bad thing and does not make you a bad Mum It is important for you to have that tiny little bit of me-time, I know for me it is having that time that gives me motivation and gumption to get through the bad days.

Amy - I would stress that when Hubby got up the other night that was the first time since Joni was 5 weeks old he has helped! Granted you might get to catch up on sleep in the day occassionally but who does the housework then? Sure enough its not them I am sorry that you had such a tough night on Saturday I too am familiar with the sobbing and begging them to go to sleep.......... I have considerd doing the wake to sleep to see if I can get Joni to sleep a bit later in the mornings as at the moment she starts stirring at 5.50 and is awake at pretty much 6am on the dot.

Muddles - Once again I am really sorry things are difficult with your Mum from what you have said you have done nothing wrong other than stand up for your right to be a good Mum to Oliver.

Katie - lovely to see you, we miss you too and look forward to your new internet connection

Well Joni is still poorly but much better than yesterday thanks to calpol and cuddles Yesterday evening I just let Joni sleep on me for 3 hours rather than put her down in her cot as the minute I moved her she would wake and I felt her getting rest was more important that her being in her cot. I did then co-sleep with her on the futon in her room as I was nervous to let her sleep alone when she is not well She actually had a suprisingly decent night waking at 10.30, 2.45 and 6 for feeds. While she is still not taking as much milk at her feeds as usual she is taking more than yesterday and her mood is better which is a great sign

Hubby is currently doing the walking rocking jiggle with Joni around the lounge singing along with the lullaby cd that I play at nap and bedtimes trying to get JOni to sleep Joni has started to refuse to be consoled when upset or lulled to sleep by anyone other than me which is gratifying in one way but a pain in the bum in others. This does upset my Hubby and I have had to point out that JOni is only like this as I am her primary carer pretty much 24-7. At the moment he just see's her at bathtime when he comes home and then its bedtime. There is no reason he can't get up with her in the mornings before he goes to work and do her morning feed and change, do bathtimes in the evening and take more of a role in the days and nights at the weekend I honestly believe that if he does this that she will start to respond more to him which would be a a bonus all round

Righto, time to get on. I'm off for a shower. Have a good day everyone

 

[modo]

Ok where would we meet? I am in South West London but I have a feeling I am in the minority here. I would be willing to travel to some halfway point that is convenient to you girls. I am not great with UK geography so I am open to any suggestions!

 

[maybebaby3]

how jealous am i of your meet!!!???!!!

 

[Frufru]

I'm in East Anglia - I could always train it to London....

 

[Sarahwoo]

Maybebaby You really deserve to have a few hours off each week, your OH was really out of order to say what he did. I hope he realises and starts to appreciate you more!!

FruFru Is Joni any better tonight? Its amazing what calpol and cuddles can do

Modo I think this will be the hard part lol! We need to list who is where and then find somewhere kind of central to everyone like you say. I am in West Yorkshire, near Leeds. Where abouts in South West London are you? My sister lives in London but I think it's North London. She used to live in Finchley, I think they are in Waltham Cross now? I know how to get there, I just don't know where it is on a map

MaybeBaby if you come over at any point (I think you mentioned a possibility of coming to Leeds at some point?) we'll have a mini meet, I can get to Leeds no problem

Well we've had a good day here! We went for a walk earlier and have had a nice relaxed day. Oliver was settled in bed for about 7.30pm so Steve and I got stuck in and had a good clear out of the kitchen - its quite a big kitchen but sooo badly designed (not by us ). We got loads done, just a few things to fonosh tomorrow. Its amazing how much we can get done after Oliver goes to bed lol!

Well I have apple crumble and custard ready and Oliver is stirring on the monitor, typical lol! xx

 

[A3my]

muddles - has the baby read the book I like that

frufru - I would have done the same thing if Alex was ill - good mummy so glad she seems to be on the mend My DH always says "he wants you" if Alex cries on the rare occasions he holds him I say thats becasue you always leave it to me to comfort him! Its wierd, my DH was much more hands on with the girls and he was much younger then, I really hope they bond more as Alex grows up.

maybebaby - your DH seems to be very similar to mine! I can feel the grrrrr I feel towards my DH when you describe what yours is like my blood boils towards mine at least once a day, he comes out with stupid comments too. Well done for walking away, you're an amazing mother and you are allowed a break!! Well done for starting WW, I want to lose a stone but I cant stop eating!! oops

modo - I'm down south too but I could catch a train up the country

Hi Katie - lovely to hear from you

 

[LogansMama]

Hi ladies... been reading and keeping up on all of you... just never have time to respond.
Will try to post soon. So busy now that I'm back to work!!!

 

[modo]

LM: Good to hear from you.

Maybe: I also feel my blood boil over when I read about your DH being mean to you. Well done for walking away from that. You are clearly a wonderful mother

Sarah: BnB has a Forum Meets forum I could start a thread there. I am in Richmond its very suburban but I like it. I like North London, my sister used to live in Finchley and I used to live in Islington as a student.

I don't drive but my DH can drive me outside London if its a reasonable distance (I feel bad asking him to drive me for too long then ditching him.) I am apprehensive about going by train with Bobby but since so many of you are willing to do this, I can also give it a go!

Can we agree that we can all meet up in London? Or Would you girls like to meet up somewhere else?

 

[Cactusgirl]

Muddles - I am fuming on your behalf about your OH car. What a scumbag I hate stories like that it frustrates me soooooooo much!

Emera - how annoying about the conflicting advice. I am very keen on BLW starting around 6months. Let us know if you get anymore info!

Sarahwoo - sounds like you are having some lovely times. And what a fab present from DH! What a shame about the house but I am sure if it is meant to happen at some point it will do

FruFru - so glad Joni is feeling a bit better and it getting some sleep. (I will email you soon promise things have been very hectic here!)

Maybe - of course you are not a bad mum meeting up with your friends

I am in Manchester but happy to travel if need be! Would love to meet some of you!!

Well as much as I adore and love Che I have to be honest ladies and say that I have been struggling the last couple of days. I think the adrenaline of the first few months and novelty is wearing off and the reality that SH$T I have a child has really hit me. There is no turning back, even though I am getting more sleep than the first 3months I am shattered.
I am very lucky having my mum next door and have been able to get out a few times with friends and DH. But it just feels like there is just no rest. If my mum or DH does look after Che it is because I have something to go to like the hen do etc so not actually getting any rest if you know what I mean. I know I could ask mum to look after him and just stay at home but then I feel I am wasting my precious expressed breast milk as Che is guzzling so much now it takes about a week of pumping to get enough for a night out!!

I know I am being incredibly selfish but I just feel like reality has really just hit home the last couple of days that this is it. Life really has changed forever!!

And I know this feeling will pass and that life has changed and been enriched in another way but I just cannot help it at the moment! (don't think too badly of me please!!)

 

[modo]

CG: you are not being selfish! Being a Mom is hard work and its perfectly normal to feel tired when things are not going perfectly. You are only human

 

[muddles]

CG you are a great mum! It is normal to feel up and down-damn hormones! I now weep at the most ridiculous things that never used to bother me before. Having a baby is a huge life changing event and it will take some getting used to, it doesn't mean you are a bad mum though.

I am not too far from London so could easily get there on a train (am half an hour away by train).

Got some good news this morning about my H's car. The insurance company have agreed to fix it all up so he will get it back on Friday. We weren't sure if they were going to fix it up or write it off or how long it would all take so it was a nice surprise to get the call this morning.

Am feeling all nervous today as Oliver has his third set of injections tomorrow (the nurse was on holiday when he turned 16 weeks, he is now almost 18). I don't know why I feel so nervous as he was fine with the other ones and seems to be having far more pain and grumbliness with his teeth.

Have a nice day ladies. I'm off to parcel up some stuff that I sold on Ebay. Managed to make £35 quid selling a few bits and pieces. Is it wrong that I now have my eye on a tent that Oliver can play in when he is older? It isn't a child's tent though but a small adult one which at the moment is cheaper than a child's play one.

 

[Sarahwoo]

CG no one will think bad of you! Having a baby is a massive life change - I'm sure its normal to have the odd 'oh my goodness' moment lol! What time does che go to bed? Since Oliver has started going to bed at about 8pm I've felt like Steve and I get a bit of 'like old times' time, to eat without one of us having a baby on our knee, get some things done etc. I've even had the odd G and T, ahhhhh that was nice! Re expressing, I have a stash of ebm in the freezer but if we go out Oliver has formula. I'm very much pro-breastfeeding but I don't think it hurts for him to have formula every now and then, and it takes so much less planning. I have a few cartons of formula in all the time. Its not for everyone but might help? Big hugs x

 

[Frufru]

Hi Ladies

Thank you all for thinking of little Joni. She is doing much better now thank you, she's still snuffly, sneezing and coughing at times but her temperature is gone and her general temperament seems to be back to normal

I opted to miss my baby massage class this morning as while Joni is getting better she is still showing symptoms and I would hate to be responsible for another of the babies at group getting poorly - if only a certain someone had shown me the same courtesy

Joni and I had her early morning nap together 8.15-9.40. Then we got up and fed, changed and went for a walk in the sunshine. It was a bit naughty going out for the walk as it meant we were coming home at Joni's nap time and consequently it was a lot harder to get her down. However, after 2 tries I did manage to get her asleep and in her cot and she has been napping now for about an hour and a half I am really trying hard to establish a robust nap and bedtime routine so that Joni will hopefully learn that when we do certain things it means she is going to be going to sleep soon and it won't be so hard to get her to go down - we will see

CG You are not being selfish at all While we were in Joni's colic period both hubby and I both admitted to thinking something along the lines of "what have we done, we were happy before, we could do want we wanted when we wanted and did not have to think about anything or one else. We got lots and sleep and were really quite happy. Remind me again why we thought having a baby was a good idea!?!?" The thing is when Joni wakes up and flashes me one of her best smiles I remember why we chose to have her and can't believe I ever questioned the decision - then I spend the next half and hour feeling like a bad person for having the thought in the first place

Sarah Joni also seems to have an innate ability to sense that I am about to eat and wakes up

Amy Our hubbies do sound similar My suggestion that hubby looked after Joni as much as possible over the weekend seems to have paid off. Hubby said last night that he had really enjoyed spending time with her, even though she was poorly, and that he felt that she was much "nicer" to him than she usually is. So this morning when JOni was up nice and early I gave it half and hour then went and climbed into our bed (I slept in Joni's room again for my peace of mind) and announced Joni had me up 4 times in the night and would he mind getting up and feeding/changing her so I could have an extra half hour in bed But do you know what, he did it, and afterwards said that she had been lovely the whole time and that it had put him in a really good mood to start the day I refrained from commenting "so, same time tomorrow then?"

Muddles - great news about the car and also about making some money on ebay I am going to bundle up Joni's newborn and 0-3 clothes and sell them on our local gumtree if I ever get around to sorting and photographing them The little tent sounds just right and I am sure Oliver will love it when he is older.

Well I really should stop procrastinating and finish up. I have to write to all my sister's creditors and let them know she died. I never had time when she died as Joni made her suprise earlier arrival and I have been putting it off ever since. Maybe I could bribe myself with the bar of chocolate in the cupboard

Have a good day everyone

 

[maybebaby3]

hi all! just got in from morissons! went with a friend of mine so we sat after shopping for a drink and had a bit of a chin wag! got to get kids in the bath now so cant do a long post will catch up a bit later!

sarah - yeah we thought about going to leeds but it's not looking likely at the mo but if things change will let you know. about ff oliver when you go out did he take to it well? which brand do you use? does it affect your supply? i am struggling to express as owen feeds from both boobs so i just seem to get an ounce or 2 every time and it seems like hard work for such a little amount.

CG - dont you dare think you are selfish can you not feed che and then give him to your mum for a couple of hours til his next feed so you can go home and sleep?

frufru - glad joni is better! well done for starting to get into the routine! i have yet to crack that one!

better go and get the bath ready for the kids! xxx

 

[Sarahwoo]

MaybeBaby I use aptimil, I just get the cartons and he's absolutely fine with it. My boobs have always been super full by the time I get home so I've either fed Oliver if he's ready for a feed or expressed, just to make it comfortable, but so there is enough milk left if Oliver wants a feed soon after. I've had no issues at all with supply, I don't do it often but it just makes it so much easier. And I obviously dont have to worry that I've left enough milk etc.

We had a lovely day today, we went to a local country park and had a walk around and a picnic. It was so nice! Steve is off work this week, we want to get some things done around the house but we're also doing some fun family stuff, we're thinking we might have a daytrip to the coast one day.

We cancelled our viewing of that house today I'm still gutted. I worked out a kind of way we could get it, but it ment having both mortgages until we sold this house and basically living on beans and toast until we sold. And then we'd still have been skint lol! I would have done it but Steve was all sensible and said there was just too much risk. I know he's right. Before we might have gone for it but we have to be sensible now I guess. It just wasn't ment for us I guess!

Oh, I also get a letter from my local surestart centre inviting me to the next baby massage course which I'm really looking forward to! I am hoping I might meet some nice local mums too since I really don't know anyone around here, let alone any mums! It would just be nice to have someone to meet for a cuppa and a chat. Have any of you guys made new friends in a similar way?

Well Oliver seems to be settled, he's so good at bedtime now (touch wood lol!). Steve is cooking tea - we called at our fab local farm shop earlier and got some steak - yum!

Oh - quick question for you ladies with a routine with timings etc - Oliver is pretty much settled and asleep for 8pm every night now. In a few weeks were all going out for a family meal and won't be home until about 9pm. Am I been cruel keeping Oliver out until that time? Having a routine is still a bit new lol!

 

[maybebaby3]

i just wrote a reply to you sarah and its got lost when i tried to post it basically it said i dont think it's bad to keep oliver out til 9. also that i met a girl off b&b who i meet once a week along with a childhood friend and her neighbour. all our babies are max of 6 weeks apart in age. owen is the youngest and also the biggest sorry about your house but maybe a better one will come along at a later stage.

 

[maybebaby3]

its 2am and still havent gone2sleep!!! owen woke when i got into bed and wouldnt settle til i bf him. just put him in his crib. fingers crossed i can get a couple of hrs sleep as need to be up in lesd than 5 hrs

 

[maybebaby3]

ugh what a nightmare night. owen woke a few mins after 2am and took til 2.45am to settle. then he woke at 3.20am and things continued like that all night with him waking every 30mins or so. he'd only settle with the boob. am at my wits end!!! if anyone has any ideas tbey'd be greatly appreciated!!! off to get erin ready for nursery now.

 

[Sarahwoo]

MaybeBaby I wish I had some advice, that must be so hard! Does Owen nap much In the day? Does he have a routine? What time does he go to bed?