Never used opk, updated - let the journey begin :)

[Bumblebee24]

It's hard jam but try to stay positive. Not long till you see little bean & am sure everything will be ok x

I've just spent the last half an hour hysterical crying. It seems everyone around me are announcing their pregnant. It will be my sister in law next as she's already told us she's trying for her second baby but wants it to be a summer baby. Am actually so angry & sad. Just a whole mixture of emotions. I just can't help but feel it's going to take a life time to fall pregnant again. Am so sorry ladies to keep going on. I just don't feel I can keep talking to hubby as I know he just doesn't want to hear about it. As you probably don't. I just need to pull myself together and get on with it I suppose. I can't change anything.

 

[Bevziibubble]

I'm so sorry

 

[JAM1611]

Thanks lovely.

And I cannot imagine how you are feeling hun. You know you can talk about it as much as you need go with us. Thats what we are here for. How has it gone this month? Xxx

 

[Bumblebee24]

Not great we've been intermert but not much at all over fertile period. I just want these next 2-3 weeks out the way so we can get back at it x

 

[JAM1611]

Are you just dtd when your in the mood? Or will you be actively doing while fertile? Xxx

 

[Bumblebee24]

Next month you mean. Well mixture really, I'll use opk but won't let hubby know. it REALLY puts him off being put under pressure but I'll know & try to come on to him at the right times x

 

[JAM1611]

Yeah. Next month sorry. Xxx

 

[BB1982]

Bumble, please do vent here!! We are all here for you and although I’ve not experienced a loss as you have, I hope I can try to understand and support you. You can’t heal and move forward (emotionally) unless you can grieve and part of that process is having s safe place to be able to say your pissed that everybody else is getting pregnant. Nobody expects you to be ok with it, it’s not fair and I wish nobody had to struggle to get their much wanted baby. Xx

 

[Bevziibubble]

^Totally agree

 

[Bumblebee24]

Thank you huni, think am also just so scared. It just feels so similar to last time and once my much want daughter was here I struggled so much. I just don't want to go through that again but I just so want another baby xx

 

[JAM1611]

Hi ladies. Im so scared something is wrong. I feel like being on here is a bit bittersweet. Ive learned so much off here already and its been great having people to talk to. But i also think its made me more anxious. As its opened my eyes to miscarriages which obviously i was aware of before but its now inside my brain constantly worrying if everything is okay. I feel that if I hadn’t been on here and read the things i read i would be just blissfully going along waiting for my scan etc. Im so confused. 6days till early scan. Xx

 

[Bevziibubble]

Sorry you're feeling so worried hun. I hope everything goes well at your scan and you get reassurance

 

[Bumblebee24]

Jam Hun, I really don't know what to say. Pregnancy I have found is quite a worrying time. Infact from the moment you become pregnant to giving birth and looking after a child you never stop worrying.
At present you have nothing that's telling you there's anything wrong that's happening. Really Hun the only thing you can do is sit tight, try not to worry and wait for your scan. Not too long now x

 

[JAM1611]

Jam Hun, I really don't know what to say. Pregnancy I have found is quite a worrying time. Infact from the moment you become pregnant to giving birth and looking after a child you never stop worrying.
At present you have nothing that's telling you there's anything wrong that's happening. Really Hun the only thing you can do is sit tight, try not to worry and wait for your scan. Not too long now x

I know and i really want to be positive. Im feeling a little better now than this morning. Ive brought a clear blue digital test to do tomorrow morning hopefully that comes up at 3+. I think its more anxious because my midwife or gp haven’t asked for bloods to actually confirm pregnancy and that my hcg is going up and up. Ive literally put all my faith in those 4 tests ive done at home xx

 

[Bumblebee24]

Glad your feeling better Hun. They don't confirm pregnancy with bloods x they only do bloods if you've had a bleed and then do scans bloods etc.
Am sure things will be just fine Hun xx

 

[BB1982]

Currently very blurry eyed at the 2am feed. Annoyingly she is doing a cycle of ‘fall asleep after 2ozs then wake up 2 hours after last feed’ at the moment so I’m getting barely an hours sleep before she’s awake again. Was hoping by now she’d be going a bit longer between feeds.
Anyway, I agree with bumble, you would be worrying I think Jam, that’s your life now, worry worry worry, wether you’re educated about a subject or not.

I never had any bloods done even with two bleeds. I’m not sure if that’s more America and fertility clinic pregnancies? Xx

 

[JAM1611]

Oh no. You poor thing!!

Well i did a digital this morning and its a 3+ so thats made me feel better. Ive got my scan Thursday evening. So just counting down the days till then! My first midwife appointment is 21st August xx

 

[BB1982]

Every point in pregnancy feels like waiting for something or counting down to the next appointment, milestone or due date etc. Then baby arrives and it all flashes by in a whirl!! Time is a weird thing.

 

[Bumblebee24]

how you feeling Jam, not long till your scan now.
Do you have any symptoms or feel any different, I never did so don't worry if you don't. Its also very early sweet xx

 

[Bevziibubble]

Yay for 3+