The "never had a second line" Group: 93 members, 18 BFP's, 2 Angel's

[TryinFor1]

Ok I have ordered a bunch of wondfo OPKs from Amazon.com and this is my first real cycle of charting my BBTs. I haven't ever used the OPKs before and i am hoping that I can confirm my ovulation the first cycle and hopefully be successful by the second cycle using them (FXed) I am really feeling positive about doing something other than BDing alot.

I really want to start temping...(not OPKs just yet) but temps I think I'd feel better if I started some charting.

---

On a non-TTC related note, I've been feeling kind of for the past day or two...and yup...here comes the flu. I feel like I've got a hangover and was hit by a truck.
Nausea and near pukey all morning, with an awful headache, and not really congestion, but my head feels full. I think I have muscle aches, but DH and I cut trees this weekend so we're both sore, that could be it.


Urg. I hate cold/flu season but I guess it's here.

Just out of curiosity, why dont you want to use OPKs but you want to temp? OPKs tell you when you are having your surge which is BEFORE you ovulate and BBT only tells you when ovulation has happened. So you will always miss your fertile window if you rely on BBT alone. Unless you just are DTD all the time. Lol

 

[Tanzibar83]

Hey Allyson11

Glad to see you've ovulated, hope you catch the egg

I hate the fact you can't see a Gyn until a year after TTC. I told a porky to mine and said we had been trying for a year but it had only been 9 months. I think it's because I went in with a determined face and laid all the facts out, eg all the blood tests, the exact lengths of the cycles, etc.

Maybe think about switching doctors and see if the new one will refer you?

Rin - temping is a great way to see exactly how your body reacts at different stages in your cycle, I highly recommend it. Hope you feel better soon. What sort of trees are they? xmas ones

flangel813 - have you ov'd today? really hope you and hubby can catch a quick 5 minutes together at any rate, like victoria said she only did it twice last month and it worked for her!

Hi littlbabywish - do you use opk's or anything to help confirm if you're ovulating?

 

[inertia63]

The only time I have ever seen a BFP, was my sister's. She fell preg 1st month.

I'm nearly a year in & not even a hint of a second line. I'm keeping positive though because I had blood tests done last month which confirmed I had ovulated & all of the other hormones were "normal".

One thing is for certain ladies, there are too many of us in this situation!

Good luck everyone x

 

[Tanzibar83]

Hey inertia63 - isn't it just a hopeless feeling when people around you fall pregnant. It's exactly the same when you go shopping, you see nothing but pregnant or new mothers everywhere and all the adverts in the shop windows seems to talk about babies one way or another!

How have you coped over the past 12 months? glad to hear you're all "normal" down below

 

[inertia63]

Hey inertia63 - isn't it just a hopeless feeling when people around you fall pregnant. It's exactly the same when you go shopping, you see nothing but pregnant or new mothers everywhere and all the adverts in the shop windows seems to talk about babies one way or another!

How have you coped over the past 12 months? glad to hear you're all "normal" down below

My sister & I started trying a few weeks apart, so although now it's lush to get cuddles and time with my nephew, it's a bitter-sweet reminder of what I "should" have by now! (It doesn't help that he looks very very much like me as well!!)

Oh, the other thing is seeing BFP constantly in car reg plates - I used to think it was a good omen, now I think it's sent to pee me off!!

How have you been coping? I've coped mostly, though I always fall apart around AF!

I wish I could be considered normal, I've still got an anomaly called didelphys uterus, which means I'll be high risk of miscarriage when I finally get my BFP. Gotta keep hoping though! Someday! Someday!

 

[CassieC]

Everyone should seriously pop over to the ttc success stories section and read this thread.... Long Inspiring Story of God's Amazing Love and Power - Please Read .... Its amazing

 

[Tanzibar83]

inertia63 - oh that must be so crushing for you deep down, but I guess it gives you more hope that if your sis can get pregnant you can too

I see those car plates all the time too, well I tend to see BFN everywhere I go, grrr!

I try and find the words to describe how to cope with LTTC and it's really hard. One thing I keep saying to the girls on here is that yes at first I was jealous when person x,y, or z told me they were pregnant but I don't have that feeling anymore. It's like it's evolved into hopelessness and despair and something else which I can't yet fathom out and so I really do struggle to be happy for pregnant women (unless they've been in a similar situation to me). I know that doesn't sound nice at all and I really wish that feeling wasn't there but it just feels like it's stuck there. Even when I'm pregnant I will probably always think of how easy it is for some and how alienated it makes you feel when you see the BFN every cycle.

In the nicest way possible I find (for mothers or newly bfp people on here) assuring you "it'll happen one day " a really empty response to what I've actually said. Of course it's easier to sit there and dish out the positive speeches once your pregnant but unless you've been sat in my shoes for the past 14 months with no hint of bfp and they're there onto kid number 3 then in my eyes we are 2 different people who cannot relate on any level so why would I take your comments on board?


I know girls on this thread say it, which I find so incredibly wonderful to hear. It just feels so much better hearing it from non bfp women because to me it shows THEY are still holding out hope which does actually keep me motivated.

Sorry to hear you have a didelphys uterus (Just been doing some googling on it) - do you have a a double vagina? how were you dianosed with it? sorry for being intrusive, you really don't have to answer if you don't want to

How come it means higher risk of miscarriage? is it because there's not enough room for the baby to grow?

 

[Scromfy]

Hey does anyone else feel too that since you've never even had a bfp, people who have had a bfp, been pregnant, and/or are parents will give you advice all the time... And you feel like you can't tell them what you really think of their crappy advice, because you have never been through it yourself. The most common one goes something like "when you have kids you will understand".... Maybe I'm being too sensitive but it seems like a private club I will never be part of. Anyone else feel like that?

 

[Tanzibar83]

Scromfy - god yeah, did you read my recent post, hehe!

I find it a little inconsiderate, it's like having a friend who's say for example blind. You say to them "oh with technology these days you will one day be able to see what I can see now which is a beautiful world with lots of colours and interesting landscapes, keep thinking good things and it will happen" - if I want to be told it happen when it happens I'll go speak to my hubby or you girls thanks. It's just so out of place for them in my eyes.

It does feel like a private club and with every close friend I have on BnB, once they get a bfp, no matter how much I talk to them or lean on them for support, it just feels like they've upped and left that bond, like we can't relate anymore. I hate being in the 2ww with people I know! I know that may sound horrible to my close friends on here but I think they get where I'm coming from, I mean them no malice!

I don't think you're being too sensitive, it's spot on and completely natural. it's like being told by a fully licensed driver the day you failed your practical test for the millionth time "You'll pass it one day, just be glad you aren't driving yet, everything is so expensive". Don't you just feel like responding with a sarcastic quip like "You don't say?! you know what I didn't even think that I'd pass at all, not now and certainly not in the future but your very helpful and useful suggestion has really made me think I can do this - forget I'm down in the dumps and lets concentrate on your view of the world shall we?"

Wow 2 analogies in one post, I need to start writing this book I keep talking about, haha.

 

[Scromfy]

Yes I did read your post and then I just read it again and I totally understand what you are saying, I completely agree with you. I think we are on the same page. I understand also what you are saying about not being able to relate anymore with friends who get their bfps. I don't think it's mean I think it's just life... It would be nice to say we are completely unselfish and that everything stays the same when we find out someone gets the bfp you've been longing for forever... But it doesn't. Especially not with this site. I think the reason I come on here (I lurked for months before posting) is because I am looking for someone to relate to. Someone who understands what it's like to want someone so bad... It's all you think about! So it's really tough when the people who are in the same situation get it before you! Although it can give you hope sometimes, as the months go by it can definitely get you down! So I think it's understandable and natural. I want to thank you for creating this post! It's this one that I found I could really connect with, for a lot of reasons...

 

[Scromfy]

Oh yeah, and I was going to say, WHEN we get our bfps, let's not be those people who smugly give useless advice! We will just listen... Be caring and understanding...

 

[welshpandora]

CAn I join please. TTC#1 for 4 months
for all of us !!

 

[inertia63]

inertia63 - oh that must be so crushing for you deep down, but I guess it gives you more hope that if your sis can get pregnant you can too

I see those car plates all the time too, well I tend to see BFN everywhere I go, grrr!

I try and find the words to describe how to cope with LTTC and it's really hard. One thing I keep saying to the girls on here is that yes at first I was jealous when person x,y, or z told me they were pregnant but I don't have that feeling anymore. It's like it's evolved into hopelessness and despair and something else which I can't yet fathom out and so I really do struggle to be happy for pregnant women (unless they've been in a similar situation to me). I know that doesn't sound nice at all and I really wish that feeling wasn't there but it just feels like it's stuck there. Even when I'm pregnant I will probably always think of how easy it is for some and how alienated it makes you feel when you see the BFN every cycle.

In the nicest way possible I find (for mothers or newly bfp people on here) assuring you "it'll happen one day " a really empty response to what I've actually said. Of course it's easier to sit there and dish out the positive speeches once your pregnant but unless you've been sat in my shoes for the past 14 months with no hint of bfp and they're there onto kid number 3 then in my eyes we are 2 different people who cannot relate on any level so why would I take your comments on board?


I know girls on this thread say it, which I find so incredibly wonderful to hear. It just feels so much better hearing it from non bfp women because to me it shows THEY are still holding out hope which does actually keep me motivated.

Sorry to hear you have a didelphys uterus (Just been doing some googling on it) - do you have a a double vagina? how were you dianosed with it? sorry for being intrusive, you really don't have to answer if you don't want to

How come it means higher risk of miscarriage? is it because there's not enough room for the baby to grow?

Ahhh you're so spot on. This thread means so much to me, because I suddenly don't feel so alone

I don't have a double vagina, though I did have a septum removed which was a thin membrane dividing my vagina. I have two cervices and two wombs. I have been told that I have a good chance of everything being fine - though til that day I hold a healthy baby, I'll always worry! And yeah, I'll be high risk because of the possible lack of space. The baby will almost certainly be breech & I'll need a c-section. Oh, and I think I'm at risk of having an incompetent (sp?!) cervix..

Thanks for caring Can I add you as a friend on here? I'd love to stay in touch

 

[littlesteph]

Hiya saw you added my name thought i'd let you know i've been ttcing 16months not 12.

Seeing my doctors tomorrow, i'm going to ask about having more tests done as i'm now on CD 64, and still nothing. no AF and still getting BFN.

 

[nramirez1709]

Hello! Reading this thread made me think "WOW, other women think the same things I do!". Makes me feel more normal to know I'm not the only one.

For a year we used contraceptives. Then we were NTNP for probably a year after that. Finally, we decided to TTC in Aug 2011 and two failed cycles have passed.

Both times I cried, felt miserable, like a failure as a woman. I hate feeling and thinking, would I have gotten pregnant easier before when I (more like my boyfriend) didn't want to start a family yet? Over the past two years there were a few (maybe more lol) times I had to take pregnancy tests because I was late or suspicious, but I NEVER had a positive, faint positive, evaporated line, nothing. I hope this BFN streak ends...I want to see those two lines, that plus sign, the word "pregnant" on a test, feel shocked, cry for joy, scream, dance, and most of all share that news with the man of my dreams

 

[sushipat]

You all are really inspiring!

Very glad to have found this forum and read and feel the emotions running around in here

nramirez1709,
I'm like you, started ttc in August, both cycles a complete dissapointment, feeling bad inside and confused, but we have to hold our head high and keep on going...we will suceed

I'm on my 3rd cycle now, so are you, right?

 

[Crumbs]

I have never seen a 2nd line and right now it feels like an impossibility. We're on our 11th cycle TTC and if you count the month we were just NTNP (but totally off) then we're on our 12th cycle.

I know I shouldn't feel the way I do but I just do. I started this journey so positive and after months of heartache it's just getting numb. I feel like I'm surrounded by people getting knocked-up without any plans and whenever I see teens on TV (or my friend's young sis w/ an unplanned baby) I think WTF! Here I am doing all I can, taking vitamins, being careful yet nothing.

Please add me to the list for 11 months. (in 2 weeks it'll be 12) ...

Fx to us all!

BTW, I might possibly have a progesterone problem but nothing's definite and my doc's doesn't seem to be worried

 

[Tanzibar83]

inertia63 Ive sent you a friend request

How were you diagnosed with didelphys honey, I'm always intruiged how these things come about. Infact I remember reading an article a while ago which said this women gave birth to a healthy baby and didn't even know she was pregnant - it didn't help when she was still having periods throughout the whole 9 months! she had a double uterus.

Let's hope that I can soon remove your name from the front page of this thread, in a nice way obviously.

littlesteph - oops, I'll change that around, thanks for letting me know (my brain wasn't at home when I did it - I've just seen your ticker and can clearly see 1 year, 4 months - doh!)

nramirez1709 - you sound very positive like you're ready to do everything you can to get that BFP, I love seeing that sort of enthusiam one thing I keep doing personally is thinking "what if?", what if we ttc earlier, what if nothing was wrong with me at all, what if it never happens...etc. It's not a good thing to do but there will always be days when I think that, there's no stopping it!

just so I have your info right on the front page, how long should I put you down for TTC on the front page?

hey sushipat - I love your avatar, they look like really bad nippers! I think at first when you TTC the disappointment sets in so quickly and it's hard to shift the longer it takes, or is that just me?

Hey Crumbs - It doesn't seem fair does it? it's a petty thing to even think really, the whole she got there first but it's embedded in everyone from a very young age and even the most selfless people will secretly want to "beat" other girls to the pip. How do you cope every cycle, do you do anything particular, or have a certain mindset throughout your cycle? in my Tww I like to think I'm one of those girls who just won't get extra symptoms. Doing that relaxes me more so I think I'll stick to that approach. For the rest of my cycle I just pee in a cup and wait for some good ovulation results! obviously having really bad days interweaved in that though!

 

[inertia63]

inertia63 Ive sent you a friend request

How were you diagnosed with didelphys honey, I'm always intruiged how these things come about. Infact I remember reading an article a while ago which said this women gave birth to a healthy baby and didn't even know she was pregnant - it didn't help when she was still having periods throughout the whole 9 months! she had a double uterus.

Let's hope that I can soon remove your name from the front page of this thread, in a nice way obviously.

littlesteph - oops, I'll change that around, thanks for letting me know (my brain wasn't at home when I did it - I've just seen your ticker and can clearly see 1 year, 4 months - doh!)

nramirez1709 - you sound very positive like you're ready to do everything you can to get that BFP, I love seeing that sort of enthusiam one thing I keep doing personally is thinking "what if?", what if we ttc earlier, what if nothing was wrong with me at all, what if it never happens...etc. It's not a good thing to do but there will always be days when I think that, there's no stopping it!

just so I have your info right on the front page, how long should I put you down for TTC on the front page?

hey sushipat - I love your avatar, they look like really bad nippers! I think at first when you TTC the disappointment sets in so quickly and it's hard to shift the longer it takes, or is that just me?

Hey Crumbs - It doesn't seem fair does it? it's a petty thing to even think really, the whole she got there first but it's embedded in everyone from a very young age and even the most selfless people will secretly want to "beat" other girls to the pip. How do you cope every cycle, do you do anything particular, or have a certain mindset throughout your cycle? in my Tww I like to think I'm one of those girls who just won't get extra symptoms. Doing that relaxes me more so I think I'll stick to that approach. For the rest of my cycle I just pee in a cup and wait for some good ovulation results! obviously having really bad days interweaved in that though!

I discovered it through "self-discovery" if you know what I mean, lol. I found the septum myself and went to the doctors & from there I had countless examinations, a scan and 2 ops to finally diagnose me. I also have a duplex kidney, which is common with this anomaly. I hope we can all be off this thread (in the nicest possible way)& in the first trimester section next month. Here's hoping!! xx

 

[TryinFor1]

I hope to see my second line soon. Lol. 3dpo.. the tww is absolutely killing me. But to be honest, since I havent even ovulated since I stopped birth control, I am just SO FREAKING HAPPY that I ovulated!