The Vasectomy Reversal Wives & Girlfriends Club. aka (VR WAGs)

[hopefulVRmum]

Thanks so much I'm hopeless with things like this but i feel a bit plain and boring next to all your lovely tickers etc .

I definitely just want one more although I've been saying that for years now . We have 4 under 10 but my youngest is starting school in September and I'm not looking forward to it. We've had a baby for 9 years and I just can't give up on one more. My family think I'm crazy but are coming round to it lol xxx

 

[rachy28]

Ah you're not so far away from me
We looked into the hartlepool clinic but ultimately decided to go with Spire Washington. I felt better knowing we had gone to a reputable hospital x

 

[hopefulVRmum]

Neighbours My name is Racheal too ha.

We did look into Spire aswell but decided against it. Hoping we have made the right choice. It's a minefield really , I didn't think we would be in this position for a single minute. xx

 

[rachy28]

Haha! What are the odds 😆
It did take us a whole year to decide on our clinic, it wasn't an easy choice at all. We looked into dr harriss in Nottingham but decided to go as local as possible. Turns out that was a bit of a pointless move as we are now having treatment between Leeds Center for Reproductive Medicine and Guys Assisted Conception Unit in London

I don't think any of us expected to be doing this, i honestly never expected doing ivf!
Its exciting though, and its great fun trying again 😉 xx

 

[hopefulVRmum]

That's very true! I truly thought we were done then 2 years ago I felt the broody feelings again...We were unsure what to do and whether we should just count our blessings but we just couldn't ignore it.

It definitely is. I am already charting and taking vitamins etc haha....not obsessing though 😂 x

 

[hopefulVRmum]

It's so worth it when you get there. Our eldest took 4 years and we were written off as unexplained infertility . We applied for adoption and as we were in the final stage we found out i was 12 weeks pregnant....x

 

[rachy28]

Oh wow, I bet that was an amazing surprise! I wish we were that lucky, I hate ivf and would do anything for a natural pregnancy. Things are a little more complicated for us though as we've got a genetic mutation which means every child we have has a 50/50 chance of having a serious heart defect. We already have 2 children with it.

It was Live_in_hope who got me into charting, im not as obsessive these days but i find it a wonderful tool for predicting when af will show. Im sure you'll find it very useful xx

 

[hopefulVRmum]

It definitely was , my periods were pretty irregular at the time so I didn't even test. I was fed up of looking at negative tests. Also I was young and naive to it all. One night there was a programme on that featured vomit and I ran to the bathroom being sick ...it happened for 2-3 days before it dawned on me that I might actually be pregnant!
We have had no problem conceiving since but I was in my 20s then I'm 33 now so hoping it all still works!

That's a scary thing for you to have to deal with...Is that something that can be diagnosed in pregnancy or when baby is actually born? I saw a baby on one born every minute who had pre diagnosed heart issues .Can't imagine the worry!

 

[live_in_hope]

sounds like your all set to get going on the ttc front!
Both of our VRs were with Dr Harriss, seemed natural to go back to him As we had had success the first time. I guess in the sense of never expecting to be here, i guess I kinda did...Im the second wife he was a 36 year old 'snipped' father of 4 when we met when I was 18.... But at 18 i didnt want children, I was happy living in the here and now and although people would say to me 'oh but what if in 10years time blah blah blah....' And I was like 'im not ending something now because of something I may or may not want in 10years time...' I have always loved kids (and I work with them) so people did find it hard to imagine me without any but I was madly in love and enjoying life with hubby. I guess Id never let myself think about the children thing...and just before we got married he told me he wanted me to have his babies....I about died of love overload...I had no idea I could love the man I was going to marry any more, but wow, a whole new found love emerged. We got married, saved a bit and had the vr...all in secret... Nobody knew we have even discussed it... So imagine my parents surprise when the first they knew about their first grandchild was when i was 8 weeks pregnant. It was a magical time I must say then after a MC 3years ago, we have been trying for No.2....that time could have been much shorter if we had discovered sooner that hubby had scarred over but we are so happy to be where we are now so wouldnt change a thing. i too charted and temped....also...do you wear a fitbit or fitness tracker? I did enjoy the temping etc but i did obsess and was glad to stop. I had been doing it for years though...hopefully that wont be the case for you guys. After the vrs, we were lucky to conceive on the 3rd cycle after each one so I didnt do it for that long those times, jus tthe time since june13-april15 xx

 

[rachy28]

Ahhh vickie your story is lovely 😍 You put a huge smile on my currently miserable face 😆

Hopefulvrmum, its currently only diagnosable through cvs testing at around 10 weeks of pregnancy. I couldn't ever terminate if we were faced with a positive result at that point so i would refuse to do the cvs. Its a progressive disease, you're generally fit and well until puberty when the heart really grows and changes in response to hormones. It ultimately leads to heart transplantation or sudden death. I have this disease, have had multiple heart surgeries and have an implanted cardioverter defibrillator which has saved my life twice now due to cardiac arrest. Its hard to watch your kids get weaker as they get older, seeing them go through surgeries are the worst but you learn to deal with it xx

 

[hopefulVRmum]

Wow what a fantastic story . Heart warming . It really is a miracle that anyone gets pregnant at all when you think of the logistics of it!
I was also 18 when I met my partner, he's older than me too but hadn't been married or had children. We started trying quick quickly after getting together , in my naivety I thought it would happen quickly....how wrong I was! I honestly cherish every moment with my babies and feel like I'm being greedy but I just can't get enough! I still look at them and can't believe they are mine x xxx

Wow rachy that sounds so complicated. I understand conpletely was just thinking along the lines of knowing beforehand so that you were prepared etc. I can't even fathom what you must go through . My son has quite severe autism and slight developmental delay but that's nothing really I am always thankful and never take it for granted that any child will be completely healthy. My best friend have birth two years ago to a baby that has very complex needs . They have her the option of termination after the 20 week scan and said he may not survive the birth . He is poorly but hes am absolute joy and he surpassed expectation by far xxx

 

[hopefulVRmum]

by the way ladies I am queen of the typos so I do apologise in advance hahaha . I hope you can translate 😂 xxxx

 

[hopefulVRmum]

I don't use a fitbit or a fitness tracker no. What do you use it for besides the obvious? I am going to buy a clearblue fertility monitor I think. xx

 

[live_in_hope]

rachy, I know about your condition from chatting over the years but everytime I read about it, it shocks me at just how serious it really is! you do a great job dealing/living with it and I cant imagine how hard it must be knowing what your children may face more of as they get older. Your daughter was last to have surgery wasnt she? So brave, all of you! xxx

Hopeful, you are right, every child is so special and I think ladies on forums like this really know just how much so and how being blessed with a child is never to be taken for granted. I totally get the feeling if great need for 'just one more baby' and I would if it was somebodys second or 10th child. Its a feeling/urge that can not be surpressed! I do worry that I will want for another but I have already told myself that thihs is it. The chances are my hubby will scar quicker this time and I just couldnt do it all again...however if it happened naturally then well, that would be a miracle...but i cant put myself in the 'i want another baby and will do whatever to get it' again......i need to enjoy the babies I have if that is all I am going to have.and hubby is 50 this year...il be 32 but it just wouldnt be practical. We cant afford for me not to work and I couldnt afford 2 in childcare....so unless we wait another 5 years when Vienna is in school, that would be even less practical...... But yer, for now...I shall remain happy with 2

I asked about the fitbit because I got one in oct and it records your resting heart rate daily and oresents it in a nice graph.....then in the week leading up to ov, it increases slightly then decreases back to normal at around 2/3dpo... Then in dec when i ovd it kept increasing each day, and it was clocking that I had done hours of 'fat buring' activities when i hadnt done snything out of the ordinary. I though it was faulty. I googled what would make me resting heart rate increase and was met with trauma, stress, anxiety, illness (none of which i was experiencing) and early pregnancy! That was the only thing that was possible. I was about 4 dpo! I watched it increase daily and my bbt chart wasnt screaming pregnancy so wasnt holding out much hope but was wondering why it was increasing each day when i was fit and well.... Then sure enough, yep i was pregnant! And since then ive seen lots of posts online about people using them to detect their pregnancies. i started a thread on here actually at the time and its still active now with people sharing their experiences.....strange how it isnt a more well known method??
It was increased the other week for afew days and i had been feeling a little dizzy and light headed so thinking it was my blood pressure i went to the doctors to discover i had a water infection! It had basically told me i wasnt well....so interesting! love it! Lol xx
Wow, talk about a mammoth post

 

[hopefulVRmum]

Even the thought of having to hand your child over to a surgeon and put their life in their hands fills me with fear. Honestly I don't know how people get through it. It's amazing the strength you can find within yourself at times.

It's so nice that people understand . My mother is the least maternal person ever and when I announced last 3 pregnancies I knew she thought I was crazy and an made no fuss or effort like she did for my first and sadly I think that's mainly because she was relieved that a wouldn't be adopting as she really wasn't keen on the idea. We don't see her a great deal these days. I'm extremely lucky in that I'm self employed and am able to do the majority of my work from home so I have never had to use childcare or I just wouldn't have been able to have so many children. Especially as they're so close in age. I'd have had them in chilcare at the same time really. I've usually put them in one or two days a week in our local nursery from about 18 months as I feel it's really benefited them but I'm so glad I never had to leave them as small babies. This time if I'm lucky enough to be blessed I'll have all of the children at school so it will be absolutely lovely to have that special time during the day going to baby groups , massage and swimming etc. I couldn't do that with all of the children as I had my middle two less than 11 months apart so I couldn't do certain things. I'm trying not to get too excited by the whole thing it's so easy to get carried away. I'm trying to hope for the best but prepare for the worst xxx

Wow that's amazing I had no idea that they were so useful when TTC! I think I better have one hehehe . Thank you

How is your pregnancy going? is your little one excited to be a big sister xxx

 

[live_in_hope]

aww thats great that you get to work from home, there have been times lately when I really wish I did something else or had reduced hours...but when i look at it, it really isnt that bad. I work in a school, im a nursery nurse in foundation(reception) and also a HLTA so I can cover classes and teach (without the responsibility/workload/pressure) of a teacher! So it means that I get 12 weeks off a year and although I work 5 days a week, i do 8-4pm. I was lucky enough to be on mat leave with Emily until she was a few weeks off being 1 and the same this time around too really. Emily starts school in sept as baby is due so I will love having that quality time with baby as I did Emily. Im very close to my parents and my mum has emily mon, tues afternoon after her mornings at nursery then she has her all day wednesday and then em does 8-4:30 at nursery on a thurs and a friday so it isnt like shes ever done full time at nursery, shes had the best of both worlds really and i couldnt be happier, shes such a great character, amazes me everyday xxx
It must be hard having your mum be like that, slthough I guess you have become used to it, it is a shame though. I cant wait for you to start your journey! Make sure hubby really looks after himself, infections are quite common after vr and wont affect the outcome/result of the op but arent nice with the area being tender already. Lots of support and no work/lifting etc, but you'll be told all this. Get him on some vits too if he isnt already, we had the pregnacare conception ones and he dank a lot of cranberry juice lol xx

This pregnancy is a dream really, emilys was too but i suffered terribly with my sacroiliac joint and was under the physio for it from about 13 weeks and the bigger i got, the harder it was and being at work really made it difficult. Although i broke up for summer hols so had 8 weeks off before em was born which was a great relief, same this time, i will be 32 weeks when we break for summer so will have 6 weeks off before V is due. So far this time my back has been amazing. Ther pe is weakness there but its well managed and im also alot smaller than i was, i lost 2 stone before getting pregnant and that has really helped. Im 27 weeks pregnant and still over a stone lighter than i was last summer! Im tiny in comparison! It really has made such a difference! The nausea only lasted a few weeks and was never sick. My hormones arent even all over the show? I havent cried over anything or blown up in a hormonal rage no cravings... To be hinest, if i didnt know i was and didnt have this bump and feel her, i wouldnt even know i was pregnant. I am enjoying it though and i know i will miss it when shes 'popped' out (as Emily says)
She cant wait, she is so excited! She is going to be great I know it! Xxx
Do your children know about your vr plans? What do they think? Xx

 

[hopefulVRmum]

Oh that's fab for your little girl having time with granny and what a lovely job you do. I have a business selling designer children's wear which comes in very handy haha. 12 weeks off a year is fabulous too and will really help in school holidays! That can be a nightmare for parents. My little one is going into reception in September I'm dreading it I'm going to miss her so much. She's so ready for it though.....little monkey hahah. She's 4 on the 11th of this month (going on 10!).

It's getting so close now!!! I am taking prenatals and dh is taking wellman and we are both following slimming world and eating clean sex. I have ordered some pills for him which I think we're called motility aid or something but they haven't arrived yet. We are getting lots of vitmain c and zinc rich foods . My cycles have decided to go a bit wonky annoyingly . My last one was 42 days and I'm on day 18 now no eggy yet. Hoping they shorten again . I took agnus castus and evening primrose to shorten them a few years ago and got dd on the first month using them so may give them another go!

As for my mum she is a funny one. My little boy was only 5 weeks when I got a bfp with dd and openly said I would 'be crazy to have it'. My hub was furious and we didn't see her for a little while following that. She's quite hard hearted at times it's difficult to deal with so I keep her at arms length as her negativity brings me down. She felt bad later on and bought the baby a £700 crib as a guilt present ..It's what she does which is a shame really as it all could be avoided.

Oh and I've ordered preseed and seven seas trying for a baby vits. Goodness we will both be rattling hahah x xxx

 

[hopefulVRmum]

clean eating not clean sex 😮😮😮😮😮😮

 

[hopefulVRmum]

Sounds like a great pregnancy. I'm a bit chunkier that I should be so hoping to shift more weight . I have lost 8lb I'm the last two weeks in slimming world and dh has lost 12lb!!! we are going away for a week tomorrow which I'm glad about because these days are dragging now waiting . 2 weeks today!!!! eeeeek

The kids are so I'm board . They know we have been saving 'to get the seeds back' bless them. My daughter was 9 in May and offered us her birthday money bless her . She's so sweet. They are very keen for a baby . I think they will go wild of it happens. I can't wait for moments like that xxx

 

[ElmoBumpToBe]

Oh I have missed loads by the looks!

Eating clean sex made me giggle haha

To be honest I still can't believe it happened and I am pregnant with this little baby! Even the NHS said the 100 percent antibodies meant he was infertile and of course I also knew of rachy struggles with the same thing, we had our consultation for the IVF and where saving the money, but I seemed to keep going back and forth and I couldn't envisage us actually doing the IVF (not that I wouldn't have been willing to, I certainly was willing to!) it's as if somehow I knew in my subconscious it wasn't going to come to it. Think you're little ones are similar ages to mine, my eldest just turned 8 and my youngest will turn 4 in September! He won't go to school this year though as he just missed the cut off. Xx