Things I cannot say out loud....

[Pink-Mummy]

To my parents

Sorry that I was born female (number 5). It must have been a disappointment then, and must have been one ever since. But TRY. TRY to show an interest. Yes my husband is wonderful, yes he plays football and yes he can converse about global economics and hedge funds until the cows come home. But so can I. Try me. I made myself interested in all of those things for you. It is bad manners to ignore me and talk to him.

Oh and while we are talking about bad manners, please dont tell me how lucky I am to have him. I know I am lucky, I married him. He also considers himself lucky to have me. And rightly so.

 

[Lettuce]

Sorry, I realise mine must have sounded mean, but me and odd girl have history, where she was super mean to me, but ever since I got pregnant has tried to share her horror birth story with me, and be my friend... But I realise I must a sounded cruel... besides, it annoys me that she gets to be a SAHM and throws it in my face, yes, I'm jealous! But I will have to back to work- it doesn't make me a worse mother! xx

 

[Kalah]

Sorry, I realise mine must have sounded mean, but me and odd girl have history, where she was super mean to me, but ever since I got pregnant has tried to share her horror birth story with me, and be my friend... But I realise I must a sounded cruel... besides, it annoys me that she gets to be a SAHM and throws it in my face, yes, I'm jealous! But I will have to back to work- it doesn't make me a worse mother! xx

That does make more since now why you don't want to be her friend!

 

[cowboys angel]

Sorry, I realise mine must have sounded mean, but me and odd girl have history, where she was super mean to me, but ever since I got pregnant has tried to share her horror birth story with me, and be my friend... But I realise I must a sounded cruel... besides, it annoys me that she gets to be a SAHM and throws it in my face, yes, I'm jealous! But I will have to back to work- it doesn't make me a worse mother! xx

That does make more since now why you don't want to be her friend!

Makes more sense.

 

[Ozzieshunni]

Lettuce. I can't imagine going back to work now and leaving Alex.

 

[Lettuce]

I know! I'm off for a while yet, but I'm already dreading it! Lol.
On the rant theme, no MIL, you cannot come take my daughter for me today, she is cluster feeding and being clingy, you cannot fix this, only I can breast feed my daughter. And see when am trying to leave cos my daughter is crying and needs settled, GET YOUR GODAMN HEAD OUT OF THE CAR AND STOP BLOODY STROKING HER AND COMMENTING ON HER TEARS, IT IS NOT HELPING!
smiles sweetly.

 

[rubycrumble]

to my parents - look, i am the mum now. so if we're together and i say lo needs a nap, or doesnt need a feed then stop undermining me - and worse of all stop relishing when i get it wrong. i am learnning but ultimatley its my decision and i will do what i think is best for my lo. oh and calpol is not the solution to everything so stop suggesting it every 5 minutes!!

to my inlaws -
1.stop just turning up uninvited - its rude and not fair on me. i am sick of seeing your face everyday - i have a life of my own and i would like some time with my baby alone!
2. do not say "your brave" in a disaproving tone when i mention me and dh have arranged one night away in oct. lo will be 8 months old by then and it'l be our first night away.
3. do not ring dh every 5 minutes on the one day iv had away from them both to see if he's ok, has got food, needs help, is coping etc and end each conversation with "seems alot of pressure on you so that she can have a break for a day". HE IS HER DAD!! he enjoys looking after her, he is a grown man so can feed himself for one day and i deserve a break if not just to get away from you turning up every day uninvited (see above!!!!)

to my neighbours - stop slamming your bloody front door. iv asked you once and i was polite but wake lo up again and il batter it down with a sledge hammer. try slamming it then.

to the nosey old women five doors down - no i am not "trainning her all wrong". she is a baby and so will cry now and again.

to my best friend - please stop competing over our babies. i love you loads and i am genuinely pleased you had an easy pregnancy, a short uncomplicated labour and your lo is a dream but i havent been so lucky so please think before you speak as i really dont want to spoil our friendship by having to say something.

to my work collegues - stop making me feel guilty for not being at work when you are short staffed. i told you all i was pregnant bang on 12 weeks and i was pregnant for 41+2. you had plenty of time to replace me - you didnt = your fault not mine!!!

phew thats todays rant - love this post!!!!

 

[Kalah]

to my parents - look, i am the mum now. so if we're together and i say lo needs a nap, or doesnt need a feed then stop undermining me - and worse of all stop relishing when i get it wrong. i am learnning but ultimatley its my decision and i will do what i think is best for my lo. oh and calpol is not the solution to everything so stop suggesting it every 5 minutes!!

to my inlaws -
1.stop just turning up uninvited - its rude and not fair on me. i am sick of seeing your face everyday - i have a life of my own and i would like some time with my baby alone!
2. do not say "your brave" in a disaproving tone when i mention me and dh have arranged one night away in oct. lo will be 8 months old by then and it'l be our first night away.
3. do not ring dh every 5 minutes on the one day iv had away from them both to see if he's ok, has got food, needs help, is coping etc and end each conversation with "seems alot of pressure on you so that she can have a break for a day". HE IS HER DAD!! he enjoys looking after her, he is a grown man so can feed himself for one day and i deserve a break if not just to get away from you turning up every day uninvited (see above!!!!)

to my neighbours - stop slamming your bloody front door. iv asked you once and i was polite but wake lo up again and il batter it down with a sledge hammer. try slamming it then.

to the nosey old women five doors down - no i am not "trainning her all wrong". she is a baby and so will cry now and again.

to my best friend - please stop competing over our babies. i love you loads and i am genuinely pleased you had an easy pregnancy, a short uncomplicated labour and your lo is a dream but i havent been so lucky so please think before you speak as i really dont want to spoil our friendship by having to say something.

to my work collegues - stop making me feel guilty for not being at work when you are short staffed. i told you all i was pregnant bang on 12 weeks and i was pregnant for 41+2. you had plenty of time to replace me - you didnt = your fault not mine!!!

phew thats todays rant - love this post!!!!

I remember the first time I gave LO calpol, it made her act loopy she sat babbling away to her self for a good hour, this was at a time when she rarely ever made a noise so it was hilarious! Decided to never give it to her again though, as funny as it was

 

[whoops]

To my dad:

Sorry I snapped at you this morning, but in future, if you want to take Lily for a few minutes, just ask. Don't dress it up like you're doing me a favour - it makes me feel like you think I'm incompetent and my automatic reaction will be to say I don't need help. I know I'm not being very rational here, but it's been 5 months - surely you should have figured this out by now.

 

[minkymoo]

3. do not ring dh every 5 minutes on the one day iv had away from them both to see if he's ok, has got food, needs help, is coping etc and end each conversation with "seems alot of pressure on you so that she can have a break for a day". HE IS HER DAD!! he enjoys looking after her, he is a grown man so can feed himself for one day and i deserve a break if not just to get away from you turning up every day uninvited (see above!!!!)

 

[cowboys angel]

^^WSS You're allowed a break. Why is it such a big deal??

 

[rubycrumble]

^^WSS You're allowed a break. Why is it such a big deal??

Oh she just likes to make the point-I went on a shopping trip for my mums bday but anyone would think I'd wrapped lo in a blanket and dumped her by some wheelie bins the way she went on. Daft thing is dh told me he was excited bout having her to himself all day as he works all week and weekends we're both there so he was looking forward to daddy and lo time.

 

[cowboys angel]

^^WSS You're allowed a break. Why is it such a big deal??

Oh she just likes to make the point-I went on a shopping trip for my mums bday but anyone would think I'd wrapped lo in a blanket and dumped her by some wheelie bins the way she went on. Daft thing is dh told me he was excited bout having her to himself all day as he works all week and weekends we're both there so he was looking forward to daddy and lo time.

That's ridiculous, honestly. People like that, who have to stick their nose in everything and throw fits over stuff that's not their business drives me crazy. Thank god my MIL actually really likes me, and usually stands up for me versus her son.

 

[Kalah]

3. do not ring dh every 5 minutes on the one day iv had away from them both to see if he's ok, has got food, needs help, is coping etc and end each conversation with "seems alot of pressure on you so that she can have a break for a day". HE IS HER DAD!! he enjoys looking after her, he is a grown man so can feed himself for one day and i deserve a break if not just to get away from you turning up every day uninvited (see above!!!!)

I'm guessing she's one of those MILs that spent every moment of the day with her baby until they went off to school and was secretly so stressed about it she doesn't want anyone else to get a break either! Being a mom is great but it is SO hard and tiring sometimes we really do just need a break. I hate saying it as "needing a break" though, it's more like "keeping our sanity"

 

[cowboys angel]

3. do not ring dh every 5 minutes on the one day iv had away from them both to see if he's ok, has got food, needs help, is coping etc and end each conversation with "seems alot of pressure on you so that she can have a break for a day". HE IS HER DAD!! he enjoys looking after her, he is a grown man so can feed himself for one day and i deserve a break if not just to get away from you turning up every day uninvited (see above!!!!)

I'm guessing she's one of those MILs that spent every moment of the day with her baby until they went off to school and was secretly so stressed about it she doesn't want anyone else to get a break either! Being a mom is great but it is SO hard and tiring sometimes we really do just need a break. I hate saying it as "needing a break" though, it's more like "keeping our sanity"

 

[Scarlett316]

To the stupid cow at baby massage - will you please stop comparing the babies to each other!!!!!! So what if your lo could sit unaided at 17 weeks and is crawling at 25 weeks?!?!

It doesn't mean that the other babies are behind!! And you're just pissing everyone off going on about it ALL THE TIME!

Shut up shut up shut up shut up.

Oh and FYI - if you're going to wear a strapless dress, FIND A STRAPLESS BRA for the love of god, or were you going for the cheap tramp look?

 

[Dobchops]

Oh and FYI - if you're going to wear a strapless dress, FIND A STRAPLESS BRA for the love of god, or were you going for the cheap tramp look?

 

[Cupkake.Luver]

To that creepy stalker lady down the street:

His name is Xavier. Not Savier, Javier, Sovier, Julio, Junior, Mister, or Hey! If you can't get it right, then FFFFFUUUUU...

His name is seriously not that hard. IDIOT.

 

[Staceysparkle]

1.stop just turning up uninvited - its rude and not fair on me. i am sick of seeing your face everyday - i have a life of my own and i would like some time with my baby alone!

Ooooo I hate this too OH's mum and dad kept doing this almost every day for weeks after I had Connor and would bring relatives I'd never met before when I was wearing my pjs all the time and just wanted to be left alone with Connor and OH. Now they hardly ever come round and I moan about that so OH thinks I just like to moan lol. Is it to much to just want some notice when the inlaws are coming!!!!

 

[hmcx]

To my mum

If I want to send Elsbeth to nursey, thats my choice! 5 hours a week is not all that bad, it will be good for her and I might actually be able to hoover!
She is not too young, stop going on at me! I didn't mention it to get your approval!

Please stop calling her Boo or Booey, it doesn't stick, noone knows who you're talking about!!

My dad

I am not mean for putting her down for naps, she gets tired and if i don't she gets very unhappy!

To everyone in my family

Yes i'm aware she's making noise, thats what she does, she moans for 5 mins and then she goes to sleep. No you should not go and get her! If she was crying/had tears or was hyperventilating i would be up there in a shot! But that is just a little whine!


Just because Ive taken a pen off of her she found on the floor and she moans, does not mean i'm nasty mummy! It means i don't want her to jab herself in the eye, and you should tidy up properly!