To Train Up A Child - your thoughts? WARNING - may be upsetting to read

[PepsiChic]

I found out about the To Train Up A Child book after reading the terrible news story about Lydia Schatz's death (news story here

I just want to add i completely disagree with this "training" method and even as a non-christian, i think that from what i have previously studied of the bible that Mike Pearl has completely got it wrong.

And for the authors to say its based on Gods wills and follows Christianity's true path have a pretty screwed up version of the bible in their hands.

This link gives a pretty good insight to what the book entails as well as the website author putting what the book says into easier to understand passages.

https://theologica.ning.com/profiles/blogs/to-train-up-a-child-an

heres some passages from the book that almost made me cry! (warning some of these may be hard to read)

Once he (the child) learns that the reward of a tantrum is a swift, forceful spanking, he will NEVER throw another fit….If a parent starts at infancy, discouraging the first crying demands, the child will never develop the habit (pg 84)

Training is not discipline. Discipline is the "damage control" part of training, but is insufficient in itself to effect proper behavior. Training is the conditioning of the child's mind before the crisis arises. It is preparation for future, instant, unquestioning obedience. (pg 4)

Children need to be trained with the rod to realize the consequences up front and sometimes this means personal learning/exposure. For example, in chapter 10 — 14, the Pearls offer a bunch of examples of quick, decisive training. Chapter 10, specifically has these examples of things they did: Gun Safety? Place an old empty gun within arm's reach a child , say "No" then have hand-switching sessions. Hot stove? Heat up the stove till it's hot to the touch; open the door to get them attracted to the flames. As they run to the door to grab it say "Hot!" and the kid winds up learning in one try that it is hot. Pond out back? Walk the kid over to the pond and stay behind them as they lean over it and let them fall in. With one child, he actually had to nudge the kid in.

Punishment must always be for things that are punishable. If a child has been fed, slept, has toys, has used the potty and isn't in pain then the parent knows that there is no reason for the child to be crying. This can be punished. If one of those necessary things are in place (say, the child is tired) then put the child to bed; don't punish him. But otherwise, the child, no matter the age, must be trained with the rod—not your hand.

As a rule, do not use your hand. Hands are for loving and helping. If an adult swings his or her hand fast enough to cause pain to the surface of the skin, there is a danger of damaging bones and joints. The most painful nerves are just under the surface of the skin. A swift swat with a light, flexible instrument will sting without bruising or causing internal damage. Many people are using a section of ¼ inch plumber's supply line as a spanking instrument. It will fit in your purse or hang around you neck. You can buy them for under $1.00 at Home Depot or any hardware store. They come cheaper by the dozen and can be widely distributed in every room and vehicle. Just the high profile of their accessibility keeps the kids in line. (quotes from online https://www.nogreaterjoy.org/articles/general-view/archive/2001/october/01/in-defense-of-biblical-chastisement-part-2/

thoughts and feelings on this book welcome...

 

[Nut_Shake]

I don't actually know what to say...

 

[happigail]

I have a little bit of sick in my mouth. Pricks.

 

[Pookie 73]

it's like reading something from the dark ages

 

[Lightworker]

Nothing contained in those excerpts comes anywhere close to being God's will. I am suprised that someone somewhere has allowed this information to be disseminated.

 

[charlotte-xo]

some people dont deserve children.

 

[Susie28]

Hope no one actually follows these guidelines. They are just wrong.

 

[kmac625]

That made me sick to my stomach. I don't even have words to explain the level of wrongness.

 

[v2007]

Vile.

V XXX

 

[PepsiChic]

I have to say the more i read on the website of Mike Pearls the angrier i get with the guy, he calls a 3 year old selfish for throwing food on the floor..AHHH

and that if a baby (under the age of 1) pulls your hair...you should pull his so he learns that its not nice!

 

[jojo_b]

How horrible. Poor little children whose parents think this is acceptable.

 

[Kimmer]

Somebody would actually consider doing these things to a child? That really makes me sick.

 

[Nut_Shake]

I have to say the more i read on the website of Mike Pearls the angrier i get with the guy, he calls a 3 year old selfish for throwing food on the floor..AHHH

That's so ridiculous it's actually laughable!! Must. Not. Harm. Pearl. Guy...

 

[bumpy89]

That makes me feel sick. Who could actually do that to their babies? Our job is to try and protect our children from harm not inflict it on them as a 'life lesson'

 

[PepsiChic]

well heres some more from the guy that annoyed me: (i know theres plenty more)

He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes (Prov. 13:24).”

This is one of many verses in the Bible that instruct parents to chasten their disobedient children with a rod. Websters Dictionary defines rod as: “a straight slender stick growing on or cut from a tree or bush.”

im sorry but i didnt read that passage from the bible as "go get a stick from that tree and smack his ass till its blue"

 

[jamiesmammy2b]

oh so thts where ive been going wrong.....instead of stopping jamie from touching the hot cooker and telling him no, i should be encouraging him to give himself third degree burns Anyone who thinks its a good idea to let their child burn themselves or fall in a pond for a life lesson or whatever needs to be shot with s**t! Anyone suggested tht i discipline my child like tht might find themselves face first in a pond with my hand on the back of their heads

 

[Rhio92]

So, so wrong

 

[xnmd1]

i don't even have words ATM.

 

[Mumtobe20]

Thats so wrong how could anyone even think about doing that to there children especially young children that dont understand right from wrong

 

[vaniilla]

it makes me want to cry reading things like this, who would encourage people to hit children I dread to think of what it does for the poor child's well-being