TTC 1st child 35+ (Please spoiler any PG news/announcements).

[skye2010]

Laura I am just worried about the whole lot right now. If I am at home alone and this bleeding comes back, if I don't get to the right hospital. If I would en up with the heavy bleeding while cx. Also there is a lot of articles flying about the reduced midwives on NHS at the moment. I just read one on Saturday. My hospital is a very good birthing centre apparently but the midwives are so overstretched and exhausted that they get you out of the hospital in 2 days and not really have time to look after you unless you have a complication. DH is not the best hands on deck guy either. I'm looking into hiring a doula to help me out. This woman was recommended by a friend and I met her. Not sure if I connected with her since she seems to have a nervous energy. But my friend said she is very good at what she does. As for the other mums. I cancelled my birthing classes 1) wasn't sure if they talked about cx 2) wasn't sure if I wanted to hear about it
As for expectant mums (Thank u Butterfly xxx) There is a meeting on Tuesday evening at a local pub. I will attend to that and luckily DH agreed to come a long. Otherwise I don't know if I have the nerve. I'm not sure what's going on in my head. I was googling and researching a lot about IVF when I had that. But this time I just don't wanna think about it all. ;(

How do you manage work? You must get very exhausted. Are you having the Braxton Hix already?? I wonder if I have them too? I have a lot of discomfort anyway so not sure what's what. Nothing major so I'm not gonna worry about that too right now.

Hi Madeline I'm glad your dr picked up on the Vit D issue. Lack of it isn't very good for your bones either. I think it helps the calcium to be useful for the body.

Missy good luck with hypno, it works really well with some women. i know a girl who had it and it worked for her

 

[NorthStar]

That is a good point about Vitamin D ladies, the skin cancer warnings are fair enough but maybe have went a bit too far so we are all frightened of any kind of sun exposure

Check your OMEGA 3 capsules if you are on them already, as mine have Vitamin D in them too

For all the UK ladies, anyone living North of Manchester does not get sufficient daylight to see them through the winter without depleting their Vitamin D stores, so definitely worth supplementing, even for general health for the whole family, not just TTC.

Skye it is hard to live long term in another country, I hope that you meet someone in the mums and babies group that you can find a connection with, the good thing about London is many other people will hopefully be in the same boat as you and will have came from somwhere else and also be missing their family. And if that doula is annoying you now, maybe she's not the right one for you?

Lava my friends are exhausted and their formerly minimalist apartment is a mess, they kind of jumped the gun on the baby thing a bit, hadn't been together long and had no savings so couldn't move to a more family friendly place -I just have to repeat to myself that it doesn't have to be like that!

 

[purplelou]

Skye - we were wondering where you were, glad you are ok!! I would think that almost every woman worries when their due date is getting close. It would be great to try and meet some simialr mums-to-be (I bet they would tell you they are feeling the same) also re articles about hospitals etc - don't pay too much attention to those, often these things are blown up out of proportion, after all it would be a pretty boring article/story if they said that most people are satisfied etc etc. you should try and see if your maternity unit does tours - most do, nd then you can talk to someone there about your worries, it would help to put your mind at rest

 

[missyt]

Skye, I know its easier said than done but don't stress yourself out. I think its good to find a support group. Just try to relax and imagine a healthy delivery. That is the most important thing you can do.

 

[dodgercpkl]

@Madeline - I had low D3 as well! I'm glad your doc picked up on it since it really is important!

@skye - I'm praying for you that everything goes well for you with this pregnancy. *hugs* Just stay positive! I know that my SIL had a doula for her 2 pregnancies and she swears by them. Have you tried talking to any others to see if the nervous energy feeling that you got from her was truly her nervous energy or something you are projecting? I tend to side with my gut feeling on things, so if you are feeling nervous about her, then I'd look into others.

@Northstar - haha yeah you are right. My doc and mom both say that just getting out in the sun for 15 mins a day can do your body a world of good. My endo has me taking 10,000IU's of it a day!! lol

 

[purplelou]

Hi ladies, I meant to add a bit on after my post to Skye, but I am at work, so have to do it in spare moments. anyways - hope you are all well, big to you all.

the dratted witch got me again today!! Grrrr, if I could tell she was approaching me, I'd spit in her eye and then run away, but no such luck. so onto December!

 

[Butterfly67]

Purple x

 

[dodgercpkl]

@Purple - *hugs* I'm so sorry the witch snuck up on you and got you again.

 

[missyt]

Purple,

 

[purplelou]

I know it's a bit medieval, but Im thinking about starting a campaign to bring back burning of 's!

 

[skye2010]

Girls thank you so much for all the support. I guess you are all right that I sound like I am panicking and it would be good to meet other women. Dodger funny enough DH said the same thing today that I feel everyone else is nervous nowadays. Lol!!! I will take all of the advise and be more active in meeting other girls )
Had a very positive dr appt yesterday which worked wonders to my mood. He was an old dr, around late 60's early 70's. Really reassuring. He told me if I didn't have the bleeding by now it is likely that I won't. And he also said that there was a big chance that my placenta has moved. Even if not my cx wouldn't have all the worst case scenarios I googled into my head ))) YEEEAAAAH! Such a big relief.

He also asked how many IVF's I had. I said 2. He said "You are lucky to be successful just after 2" So for all the girls on IVF row I guess first time lucky is far from expected.

Purple I am saddened by your dad's condition. You are being a great daughter by supporting them. Although it is emotionally and physically very draining it will help both them and you to feel better if you get involved. Is the moving not an option any more? It sounds like it might be too exhausting for your dad. Also is there any help you could get for them? Nurse/housekeeper. Just someone who comes in and out and cares for them. I know your mum would look after your dad but it might get too much for her at some point and it's good to build a relationship with someone who might be very useful if things get more difficult. Also it would keep your mind at ease while you are not there. I guess this is what you can think of once you discuss your dad's illness with his dr and find out what can be expected in the tx period.
As for the witch I completely support you on the witch hunt.

It is 6 am and I've been up for 2 hrs. Will go back to sleep now so more personals later girls loads of xxxx

 

[purplelou]

Skye - it sounds like you are feeling better and that's good. My mum met some of her "friends for life" when she was pregnant with me, through antenatal classes etc and they have stayed in touch ever since, so it's a great idea to meet some other mum's to be
my parents are still planning on moving, they are seeing the oncologist today and mum has written a list of questions which include about the move and if any treatment etc can be transferred to the hospital here. that way I will be able to help lots and also my DH and my MIL has kindly said she is up for driving them to appointments, taking my mum shopping etc (they are good friends now) which will be great, so hopefully that will be organised before Christmas .

If anyone wants to send a positive thought towards my parents today, I would be so grateful

 

[Butterfly67]

Sending positive thoughts right now purple

 

[skye2010]

Sending many positive thoughts for your dad and mum Lois, I will pray for them tooxxx

 

[Dwrgi]

Hello everybody! How are you all today??

Skyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyye!!! Please don't fret hunni! What you are feeling sounds perfectly reasonable to me. You have come so far and now you are at the point when you face losing control of the situation again. It is completely natural to feel like this-and I am sure there are thousands of women who feel the same. Just remember, if childbirth was soooo bad, nobody would go back to do it again!! I think it is a really good idea of Purple's to have a tour of the maternity units of local hospitals, so that you can meet the staff and know in your mind where you will be, and who will look after you. I am sooooo glad that you met with the consultant yesterday, and it sounded as if he had very wise words to give you-so, take his word, think positively and don't go ahead of worry. I guess you have to find a way of occupying yoru mind so that you haven't got idle moments to think about the what ifs, and waking up in the middle of the night is a killer for that. If you do find your self waking up and worrying, perhaps it might be a good idea to write your worries down, and then know that you will tackle them all the next day.

The doula idea sounds good-if you didn't click with the first one, try another, although I do think that Dodger is right in that you may have been projecting nervous energy yourself. Do what feels right for you though.

Thanks for passing on the comment about needing several IVFs to achieve a PG-always heartening to know! You are always soooooo good at thinking of others! Now, please try not to worry-Shirin will arrive here safely and you will hold her in your arms in absolutely no time. We are all with you, and sending you HUGE ! Lots and lots of love to you!

Purple-so glad that your parents are seeing the oncologist so that they can get all the answers they need, and so good that your DH's family is on board too. You sound like a really close knit group, and am positive your father will get all the love and care that he needs. Alas, I am with you on the burn the witches campaign, as my witch arrived this morning, which I knew she would. Boo hisss! And, to make matters worse, I have terrible cramps too. As OMM used to say 'darn that witch!'

Love to you all,
Axxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

 

[lavalux]

Purple,
Sending prayers & good vibes your family's way.

Dwrgi & Purple,
Hang the witch ... or drown her in a big ole glass of wine!

Skye,
Glad you are feeling more positive. Lots of good advice above.

There are snow flurries expected in Atlanta today. Woo wee! I have 2 doctor's appts but then plan to hop back into bed & take advantage of my sick leave from the office. Tomorrow it's back to work!

 

[Dwrgi]

Have a nice snuggly afternoon in bed! Whooo hooo for snow, but hope it doesn't cause trouble! Good luck with the appointments.
xx

 

[dodgercpkl]

@Skye - I'm so glad you are feeling better! And how nice to get the good news that the possibility of bleeding is likely not to happen!!! I hope you meet some wonderful ladies that will make you feel more comfortable.

@purple - tons of prayers and positive thoughts heading your way. That's so awesome that your mom and MIL are great friends! And I'm more then happy that your parents will still be moving closer and I hope it happens very soon.

@lava - oooo! I'm a So Cal gal, so I'm jealous of your snow flurries! I hope your 2 appointments go well!

 

[MommyToBeIsMe]

Morning ladies! I was hoping to join you on this thread. I'm 38, DH is 39 and today is CD 1 of our 4th month TTC #1. DH is on Vits to inc his SA and in Jan/Feb (whenever our schedules allow!) we'll be going in for IUI.

I'm pretty obsessive TTC so for Dec I'm not going to temp in order to relax and enjoy the holidays. I haven't read through the entire thread (I'm getting there!) so I'll just send out to everyone.

 

[Butterfly67]

Hello Empty Bin!! (sorry that is what MTBIM sounds like when I abbreviate it ) and welcome to this thread!