TTC 1st child 35+ (Please spoiler any PG news/announcements).

[twinkle1975]

Lady H - hope it goes ok at the doctors - now step away from Google!!

Just wanted to share with you all how amazing my parents are - having had a bit of a blub on the phone to my Mum yesterday following 2 bfp announcements - she rang today & said they'd been looking online at their local private hospital and had decided that if things didn't happen for us with our NHS FS they'd pay for a cycle of IVF for us!!

I was speechless with gratitude & then cried - then my Mum cried, then DH came in & told him & he cried! I think my Dad was snuffling in the background too!

 

[heavenly]

Lady H - hope it goes ok at the doctors - now step away from Google!!

Just wanted to share with you all how amazing my parents are - having had a bit of a blub on the phone to my Mum yesterday following 2 bfp announcements - she rang today & said they'd been looking online at their local private hospital and had decided that if things didn't happen for us with our NHS FS they'd pay for a cycle of IVF for us!!

I was speechless with gratitude & then cried - then my Mum cried, then DH came in & told him & he cried! I think my Dad was snuffling in the background too!

How lovely of them.

 

[Pennyb]

Lady H - hope it goes ok at the doctors - now step away from Google!!

Just wanted to share with you all how amazing my parents are - having had a bit of a blub on the phone to my Mum yesterday following 2 bfp announcements - she rang today & said they'd been looking online at their local private hospital and had decided that if things didn't happen for us with our NHS FS they'd pay for a cycle of IVF for us!!

I was speechless with gratitude & then cried - then my Mum cried, then DH came in & told him & he cried! I think my Dad was snuffling in the background too!

That's lovely, what nice parents

 

[HappyAuntie]

Lady H - hope it goes ok at the doctors - now step away from Google!!

Just wanted to share with you all how amazing my parents are - having had a bit of a blub on the phone to my Mum yesterday following 2 bfp announcements - she rang today & said they'd been looking online at their local private hospital and had decided that if things didn't happen for us with our NHS FS they'd pay for a cycle of IVF for us!!

I was speechless with gratitude & then cried - then my Mum cried, then DH came in & told him & he cried! I think my Dad was snuffling in the background too!

 

[ipen44]

Hi Everyone,

I am so impressed by those of you who call so many out by name. Do you take notes as you are reading?

I think we should definitely get some studies going on infertility over 35. I am in clinical research and it looks like we have enough medical people on here to put together a well controlled randomized clinical trial

Heavenly--I got very sick to my stomach on clomid one night and passed out cold. I think it was CD 5 or 6. Weird.

That is so sweet about the parents paying for IVF. Having support is really wonderful.

I will avoid jumping into the natural/traditional medicine debate .. The best treatment for a person is probably only clear to that particular person and their spouse.

I got my blood work back. No STDs . It cracks me up that only an infertile woman using donor sperm has to show she has no communicable diseases prior to trying to get pregnant with donor sperm. What is the rationale there? Anyway--I now my that I am A+ and CMV-. We order Monday and pray that I am not out of town during ovulation or do not ovulate on Sunday.

I hope everyone is having a good weekend. Love coming to check in on all of you ladies .

 

[drsquid]

ipen- do you have to prove it? or are they just trying to treat them before you get pregnant (if they are present). i was neg for everything as well but picked cmv pos sperm anyway

 

[ipen44]

Hey all,

Sorry I haven't been contributing very much over the last couple of weeks. I've really been struggling with things. I have been reading when I've felt able to & keeping you all in my thoughts & prayers.

Yay for our BFP ladies & thanks to those having acupuncture for the interesting information. Big hugs to all those having a tough time at the moment.

I went to see the GP about the mystery mid cycle bleeding - he said it was probably just one of those things & to come back if it happened. Very helpful!!

I've been running (I use the term very loosely!) to try & kick start my weight loss - I've been out for the last 3 days, it's not a pretty sight!

I've had 2 pregnancy announcements in the last 2 days - one of my best friends who I'm really happy for, an an ex's wife who I've always disliked cause he left me for her - I just want to poke her in the eye!

I applaud you for whatever fashion on running you are doing . Working out is so hard and I always feel like people would make fun of me for running. Way to go. Keep it Up.

 

[purplelou]

oh pooh! I just typed out a huge message and then lost it I'll try again.....

Firstly, Twinkle, I am almost crying for you too, Your parents are wonderful and what a lovely thing to have an offer like that when you were feeling so low

 

[purplelou]

Ipen - I does seem rather strange to have all those tests done, however it's good to know you are completely healthy before you get pregnant! Good luck with this cycle


Heavenly - Im glad you are feeling better now! I hope you are back to normal really soon

 

[purplelou]

Im doing this in little short goes now rather than one big message....


HA - wow, an orange?? that must be so uncomfortable. (I probably wouldn't notice too much though with my extra "layers" )

 

[Dwrgi]

Girls-I've just lost a message that I'd typed, so annoying!!

Twinkle, just wanted to say that please pm me if you feel really low about this whole business. I have had a really bad week too, and, although I'm delighted for my friends with their new BFPs, it completely knocks me for six-why is it never me?? Anyway, I am here for you hun, and a problem shared is a problem halved, and all that! Also, just wanted to say what brilliant parents you have, and what a huge weight off your mind. Am so pleased for you hun! Good on you for the running! too! Lots of love, Axxx

Asry-30mm-holy moley! Hope you're having a good weekend! xxx

Ipenn-what a bizarre set of tests, but it will be worth it when you get your BFP!!

Lady H-sorry to hear about the cyst, but better to hear it's nothing from a professional, than imagining the worst. Big to you hun!

Good luck to all those OVing=let's hope you catch your eggies, and good luck HA with your stimming.

Hello everbody! Hope you're all having a good weekend!

I've got all the usual OV twinges, and uncharacteristically, absolutely LOADS of EWCM, but contraception for us. Alas. Just come in from seeing 'The Artist' and would thoroughly recommend it. Absolutely brilliant, and the dog steals the show, although I would say that!!

UK girls might be interested to know about an article in this month's Marie Claire about infertility driving a wedge between friends. Of course, they paint the infertile woman as somewhat hysterical and unreasonable, quelle surprise, and they could have done so much more with it, but at least it IS an article on infertility. It really annoys me that infertility is just not dealt with by the media, we are treated like lepers. In soapland, somebody wants to get pregnant, and within a month they are. Magazines could do so much more with helpful and informative articles, but no, instead they focus on how being a mother affects your career, or how to get your relationship back on track after having 6.7 kids. Yada yada! Grrrrr. That is my rant. I really feel like sending a blanket email to these mags and highlighting this issue so that people get SOME idea of what we go through, rather than us being made to feel invisible.

Anyway, rant over! Have a great weekend, lovely girls!

 

[purplelou]

Dashka - you shouldn't feel guilty for not doing anything you don't want to do. We have decided that it has to be a natrual route for us and I feel happy with our decision! I would say that assisted conception is very stressful, so you have to completely comfortable with it in order to go ahead xx

Penny - good luck this cycle - my cbfm always asks for a stick on CD6 too!

Big to all you ladies and also to LahyH, Asry, Dwrgi, Missy, Northstar, Never (Im chuffed to bits for you!) Omm, Pad (in case either of you is lurking) manuiti, Luv (just in case) Nikki, Carole, Lava and Skye and anyone else I am forgetting - so sorry xx



Afm - SNOW!! and lots - at least by UK standards there is. Ovulation is usually around cd 14-17 and cbfm is saying high so we are continueung to dtd every other day and keeping our fingers crossed. I have Monday off work, so we can watch the Superbowl (DH is a huge fan) on Sunday night, so we might try every day for the 2 days

Hope every one is having a nice weekend? and uk ladies - stay warm

 

[purplelou]

Ohh - LadyH, just wanted to say, what you might be feeling could be a Nabothian follicle on the cervix, they are quite common and harmless, but it is defintely best to have someone take a peek

I know this is wikipedia, but the info is good...

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nabothian_cyst

 

[missyt]

Dashka, I was on clomid for 4 cycles and I hated it. I was a complete bitch. One night I threw a laundry basket at DH. So out of character for me. It also made AF very heavy, clotty and painful cramps. Clomid was definately not for me. But I agree with you as far as how your acupuncturist listens to you. Mine does too. I really appreciate that about her and it helps my sanity. The RE I had was awful. Couldn't remember my DH's name ever, lied to me (long story), called me with another patients results, and while having my information up on his computer screen, could not get it right how many IUI's we'd done. I did 4 IUI's and one IVF and it didn't work for me. So I personally feel like I owe it to myself to do the natural route. I totally cleaned up my diet and realized that before all this, I enjoyed wine a little too much. I went for wine when I was having a bad day or needed to relax but in researching the natural method I found out that meditation and yoga were much better for me if I wanted to relax or destress. Everyone is different and its your personal choice and no one should make you feel bad about it, especially yourself. One thing I love about this thread and why I've been on here for over a year is because many of us are supportive of each other and what routes we decide to take to get our BFP, even if it differs in opinion with what someone else is doing. I've been through IVF so I think I can help the girls out who are going through it for the first time because I've been there but I'm not going to bash the IVF process just because it didnt' work for me. You need to do what is right for you. My brother and SIL adopted as well because she couldn't do IVF. She saw her cousin go through it and decided it wasn't for her. I haven't gotten my BFP yet but I can tell you that taking the natural route has made me healthier (I sleep better, have more energy and overall happier and less stressed), look at myself as a person, trust myself and my instincts, and has helped me gain my interest in things back. I know my RE was a peice of crap but I didn't know that until I went through the process. I should've known something was wrong when he told us there was nothing we could do on our own to increase our fertility. Apparently going on drinking, smoking, eating crap, etc was all okay as long as he could pump me with a bunch of drugs. I know my RE sucked and not all are like that but the lesson learned there was that I should've trusted in myself.

Twinkle, what awsome parents you have! That must be so comforting!

Dwrgi, I read a book a few months ago that I had to throw in the trash. I don't even remember the name and don't want to but it was misleading. I saw it as a support for infertility book and instead I felt like it was chastising infertile women for feeling sorry for themselves and then it'd give examples of relaxation techniques. It had a really negative undertone. I threw it in the trash after I read a part that said that we shouldn't be jealous of friends who get pregnant because they could be jealous of us for having a good job, nice car, etc. Really? I'd trade in my nice car, etc. any day just so I could be a mom and I think most of us feel that way. But its like you said, they don't give infertility enough of attention. I'm with you, sister!

 

[HappyAuntie]

Afm - SNOW!! and lots - at least by UK standards there is. Ovulation is usually around cd 14-17 and cbfm is saying high so we are continueung to dtd every other day and keeping our fingers crossed. I have Monday off work, so we can watch the Superbowl (DH is a huge fan) on Sunday night, so we might try every day for the 2 days

Hope every one is having a nice weekend? and uk ladies - stay warm

When you watch the Super Bowl, imagine me waving to you in all the aerial shots of Indianapolis! :wave: :wave: :wave: Not that I'll be out there in that madness tomorrow, thank you very much - I'll be sitting on my couch in my comfy pj pants watching the game with one eye while surfing here with the other.

I threw it in the trash after I read a part that said that we shouldn't be jealous of friends who get pregnant because they could be jealous of us for having a good job, nice car, etc. Really? I'd trade in my nice car, etc. any day just so I could be a mom and I think most of us feel that way. But its like you said, they don't give infertility enough of attention. I'm with you, sister!

I had someone tell me just the other day that she's envious of me. She's at least 48, recently married for the first time and she gained a bonus 8yo SD in the marriage. She absolutely adores her SD and all 3 parents seem to have a good, healthly co-parenting relationship, but like you've said in the past Missy, gaining a SD makes her want her own bio kid even more and she's working through some grief accepting that it will never happen. So in light of all that, she admitted she's envious of me going through IVF. I understood why she was saying it, but didn't have the clarity of thought at the moment to tell her no, she's envious of the opportunity I have, she is NOT envious of me. No one would envy 3 mc and a belly covered in bruises from daily injections. She's envious that I still have the possibility of having a baby, but if she thought about it a little better, she'd realize she does NOT want to be in my shoes.

Dwrgi, the other thing that drives me nuts about the soaps is when someone has a mc - she's fine like a week later and it never gets another mention. Or if it does, it's because she went crazy and steals another woman's baby.

AFM and my gargantuan ovaries, we're still hanging in there! I can definitely feel them at times, depending on my posture when I'm sitting and things like that. I won't have to worry about feeling ovulation, though, because they use really good drugs during egg retrieval! DH and I spent about 90 min this afternoon reading through and signing our consent forms - they're due at tomorrow morning's follie check. And DH got a look at all the bruises on my belly last night and he wants me to adjust where I do tonight's injections so that I can make a smiley face of bruises on my belly! I just might have to do that!

Hope you're all enjoying your weekend!

 

[twinkle1975]

- bruise smiley!!

 

[missyt]

HA, you are right about the SS thing. I had a good talk with my counselor about it and she made me feel a lot better. I really do try hard with him but then all my effort gets sabotaged when he goes back to his mom's house. She's a very interesting individual and she's lucky to be married to the man she's married too. Unfortunatley I have to deal with her a lot because DH usually ignores her emails and phone calls and she's found out its easier to talk to and get a hold of me. But if its in the best interest of SS then I'll suck it up. He just turned 12 so he's at an interesting age. But just like your friend, having a stepchild makes one long even more for their own child. I've been so fortunate to have a family who accepts him as mine. He is definately a grandchild to my parents and nephew to my brothers and sister. The "step" part definately gets left out. And SS is great with babies. I know he'll be a really good big brother and I think he's hoping for that. When I took him up to see my family this year (poor DH couldn't go because he just started a new job and had to work) he was fawning over my baby neice. I got some really cute pics of them. Oh, and as far as the bruises I totally know what you are talking about. Wait until you start the ganirelix. YOu'll really be an expert. I shot that one in my thigh and it wasn't bad. I was thinking "why didn't I do it here all along". But it sounds like you are doing really well. You are a strong lady.

 

[caroleb73]

Hey Ladies hope you are all having a wonderful Sunday.

HA glad to hear you are hanging in there and those follies are growing well, love the idea of a smiley face. It's a good way to make a heavy situation that little bit lighter. Totally agree with you that if people really knew what we go through TTC then they wouldn't really be jealous at all, yes we have choices but these choices are very painful ones that take everything out of you. I am sending you so much love and positive energy to help this IVF along and be the sticky BFP for you and DH

Dashka welcome and no need to have those feelings not taking the IVF route. It is such a massive step and very hard, not for everyone at all. I believe that every lady knows deep down what is right for them and their body and I support that choice. I myself have done 2 IVF cycles and was so relieved that I got a natural BFP miracle in September as I couldn't face doing another cycle even though DH wanted me to. Hoping that your BFP is just around the corner for you

UK ladies I having been watching the news updates on the snow back home and I must admit I am glad I live here right now. I am such a woss now that I can't cope with the cold and snow. Wrap up warm and take care driving.

AFM not much to report on the bump front just that it is getting very big and difficult to sleep now. But on the personal front one of our dogs went missing today, we suspect our pool man stole her but can't prove anything yet. It is quite common here to have your pets stolen by workers who then either sell them or suddenly turn up with them when a large reward is offered. So far her sister doesn't seem that distressed just a little quiet. Have been out looking everywhere for her but it doesn't add up as we have high walls round our house with a security gate so can't see how she escaped and if she did she would never stray from the house as not brave at all. Hoping that she is found soon as feel so bad that she is alone right now.

 

[Dwrgi]

Afm - SNOW!! and lots - at least by UK standards there is. Ovulation is usually around cd 14-17 and cbfm is saying high so we are continueung to dtd every other day and keeping our fingers crossed. I have Monday off work, so we can watch the Superbowl (DH is a huge fan) on Sunday night, so we might try every day for the 2 days

Hope every one is having a nice weekend? and uk ladies - stay warm

When you watch the Super Bowl, imagine me waving to you in all the aerial shots of Indianapolis! :wave: :wave: :wave: Not that I'll be out there in that madness tomorrow, thank you very much - I'll be sitting on my couch in my comfy pj pants watching the game with one eye while surfing here with the other.

I threw it in the trash after I read a part that said that we shouldn't be jealous of friends who get pregnant because they could be jealous of us for having a good job, nice car, etc. Really? I'd trade in my nice car, etc. any day just so I could be a mom and I think most of us feel that way. But its like you said, they don't give infertility enough of attention. I'm with you, sister!

I had someone tell me just the other day that she's envious of me. She's at least 48, recently married for the first time and she gained a bonus 8yo SD in the marriage. She absolutely adores her SD and all 3 parents seem to have a good, healthly co-parenting relationship, but like you've said in the past Missy, gaining a SD makes her want her own bio kid even more and she's working through some grief accepting that it will never happen. So in light of all that, she admitted she's envious of me going through IVF. I understood why she was saying it, but didn't have the clarity of thought at the moment to tell her no, she's envious of the opportunity I have, she is NOT envious of me. No one would envy 3 mc and a belly covered in bruises from daily injections. She's envious that I still have the possibility of having a baby, but if she thought about it a little better, she'd realize she does NOT want to be in my shoes.

Dwrgi, the other thing that drives me nuts about the soaps is when someone has a mc - she's fine like a week later and it never gets another mention. Or if it does, it's because she went crazy and steals another woman's baby.

AFM and my gargantuan ovaries, we're still hanging in there! I can definitely feel them at times, depending on my posture when I'm sitting and things like that. I won't have to worry about feeling ovulation, though, because they use really good drugs during egg retrieval! DH and I spent about 90 min this afternoon reading through and signing our consent forms - they're due at tomorrow morning's follie check. And DH got a look at all the bruises on my belly last night and he wants me to adjust where I do tonight's injections so that I can make a smiley face of bruises on my belly! I just might have to do that!

Hope you're all enjoying your weekend!

Would applying an ice pack prevent the bruises?? Thinking of you hun, in your comfy pjs! Your comment re soapland made me laugh. Nobody has any idea, do they? And I agree, she wouldn't want to be in your shoes, or in any of our shoes, and that is why we are all here for each other, through thick and thin! Lots of love to you and your gg ovaries!

 

[Dwrgi]

Hey Ladies hope you are all having a wonderful Sunday.

HA glad to hear you are hanging in there and those follies are growing well, love the idea of a smiley face. It's a good way to make a heavy situation that little bit lighter. Totally agree with you that if people really knew what we go through TTC then they wouldn't really be jealous at all, yes we have choices but these choices are very painful ones that take everything out of you. I am sending you so much love and positive energy to help this IVF along and be the sticky BFP for you and DH

Dashka welcome and no need to have those feelings not taking the IVF route. It is such a massive step and very hard, not for everyone at all. I believe that every lady knows deep down what is right for them and their body and I support that choice. I myself have done 2 IVF cycles and was so relieved that I got a natural BFP miracle in September as I couldn't face doing another cycle even though DH wanted me to. Hoping that your BFP is just around the corner for you

UK ladies I having been watching the news updates on the snow back home and I must admit I am glad I live here right now. I am such a woss now that I can't cope with the cold and snow. Wrap up warm and take care driving.

AFM not much to report on the bump front just that it is getting very big and difficult to sleep now. But on the personal front one of our dogs went missing today, we suspect our pool man stole her but can't prove anything yet. It is quite common here to have your pets stolen by workers who then either sell them or suddenly turn up with them when a large reward is offered. So far her sister doesn't seem that distressed just a little quiet. Have been out looking everywhere for her but it doesn't add up as we have high walls round our house with a security gate so can't see how she escaped and if she did she would never stray from the house as not brave at all. Hoping that she is found soon as feel so bad that she is alone right now.

Oh gosh, that's absolutely dreadful. I do hope that you find her too, bless her. Yes, how on earth could she have escaped? That man clearly has no brains. Please please, I hope you find her.

Sorry about the bump and not sleeping! Suppose you have to rely on naps when you can? Sending big hugs and fingers crossed for the safe return of your dog, Axxx