TTC 1st child 35+ (Please spoiler any PG news/announcements).

[purplelou]

Get well soon Dashka,
big loves xxx

https://www.millan.net/minimations/smileys/getwell.gif​

 

[froliky2011]

Well, I know you all said that waiting while in-laws are here is probably for the best, but we found a doctor today. It was just too difficult for me to sit and let a month go by when everything is in working order etc. I feel like last month was a bit of a waste because I was like Butterfly and had a very short cycle and it was all messed up from the mc. Now, it's all back on track again and I just don't want to just watch it go by (if you know what I mean). I will know more tomorrow when the doctor calls but I have a feeling we are moving forward with IUI#4 end of March (In-Laws or not). My DH decided to say something so that takes the pressure off. No hiding anymore. Whew!

Bella - It is challenging and picking yourself up after every "Blow" takes skill.

Dashka - I hope you feel better soon!!

Dwrgi - How are you holding up?

Purple - Glad to hear all is well with the sticky bean!!

Butterfly - Glad AF finally showed. You are right behind me and we'll be going through the TWW together if all goes well.

Hi to everyone else..I just wanted to quickly get on and read and post a quick update.

xoxo

 

[Butterfly67]

Dashka just want to send some and say hope you feel better soon

Froliky, glad you found a doc and your DH has said something so you wont have to play secret squirrell. Let's get our Sticky bfps together!

 

[manuiti]

Wahhhh, internet's been playing up for a couple of days now and now I'm so behind on this thread. I can't keep up!

Well, before my connection dies on me again, my quick update is that my meds arrived today. And the little needle is bigger than I remember it...

Sorry this is a bit of a selfish, me me me post!

Big to everyone!

 

[twinkle1975]

Dashka - get well soon!

Manuiti - eek to the needle.

Dwrgi - sending you & your 3 big snuggly vibes!

Hello to everyone who has the witch staying with them at the moment - she's p**ing me off - coming & going over the weekend - she's finally kicked in properly today - CD4 - bringing with her the worst cramps I've had since we started TTC - damn her!!

Hi everyone else - bellamie - I sympathise - the feeling when AF arrives is rubbish xx

 

[Nikki Leigh]

FINALLY caught up (I think)! Yikes, I need to visit this thread at least every other day to keep up. So, there's no way that I'm going to write down and follow-up with what's what with everyone for the past two weeks. But I see that there are a few nasty BFNs (Booooooo), some downright evil (Hisssssss) and some waiting to exhales (good luck in the TWW). I also some a few colds (I think Dashka and Purple). I do hope that you get better soon (probably happened like a week ago, so you're OK now, LOL).

I have been just hammered of late. I try to log on to read a post, my eyes go cross, and I just can't. But I will be here more often. Hugs to all. Oh, and I was one of the early adopters of the Whatever wagon. So...WHATEVER!

 

[purplelou]

manuiti - woohoo - meds have arrived - so everything is moving! it's very exciting!! Im sorry the needles look big though try not to think about it!

dashka - hope you are feeling better today, take it easy!

Nikki- lovely to see you! have you had your scan and everything now?? have you told everyone?? how are you??

Butterfly - how was dinner? I hope you had a lovely night and AF let you enjoy yourself

HA - Big loves to you xxx hopefully things are continuing to get a little bit better each day for you

Frolicky - I am delighted you might have found another doctor! and good news that dh will be able to take some of the pressure off with a few well chosen words! onwards with iui!

LadyH - im off to check on your journal in a bit and see if you have resisted the urge to test!!

Twinkle - I am so sorry that AF is treating you so cruelly! big - I hope she is almost finished and gone xx

Dwrgi - how are you feeling now? and has the discomfort you were getting settled now? how much longer do you have to wait? and are you have blood tests done or will you test at home?? Im keeping everything crossed for you xx

and lovely squishy to Lils, Asry, missy, Carole and anyone I am missing (sorry) have a fab day everyone xxx

 

[Dwrgi]

Frolicky-I am very glad that you have found a doctor, as you were so 'raring to go'! Also good idea for DH to have a word, otherwise it would be so hard on you both, with all the cloak and dagger stuff going on! Good luck with it all!

Purple-thanks for asking! MY OTD is next Friday, March 30th, which feels like EONS away!!! I have been given a hpt-haven't even opened the envelope as I don't want to jinx it! Then, if it's positive, they get you in for betas. I SOOOOOOOO hope it will be positive. I am MUCH better now-Saturday, Sunday and Monday morning was awful, but only getting twinges now and the occasional crampy feeling, which is the Cyclogest (progesterone) bum plugs. I talk to T,S and C and hope they're still in there, going strong..... How are you? Have you held out and not told anybody? I bet you'd LOVE to tell your parents! Hope you had a nice chilled afternoon yesterday, and try to take it easy.

Twinks-thanks for asking after me and the 3 embies! That blooming hag, she is sooo unwelcome, and to bring such pain and discomfort with her too. It's just so unfair. Hope you feel a bit better today! Big to you, Axxxxx

Nikkie-lovely to hear how you're getting on. I'm sure that being tired is quite normal; hope you're resting as much as you can! Keep us up to date with what's going on! xxxx

Man-any sign of hag bag? For once, she is welcome! Hope you've got your cupboards and fridge full of beans, and lentils, and nuts, and all sorts of different proteins! Good luck!

Butterfly-how do you feel today? Is AF quite heavy-I've read that they can be, after an mc? I hope you're okay. Big

Dashka-feeling any better now? I hope that the drugs are taking effect and you feel a bit more healthy. Sounds like you just needed to 'crash'. Big xx

Lil-what are you up to? Hope you're okay? xxx

Dr S-still enjoying Belize? Hope AF stays away.

Asry-did going to the gym help bring She Who Shall Not Be Named along? I hope so, so you can move on to cycle 2. Big hugs ! xxx

HA-how are you? You've had time to absorb the docs words-he sounded so encouraging. I guess it's just a horse that needs to be got back on, IYKWIM!! Thinking of you, Ax

Hi Lady H-we miss your posts, but you got to do what you got to do! xx

Madeline-

Hi Missy!

And hello to anybody I've missed!

Off to meet my parents now for lunch in Swansea (they live in Pembs, so half way point). Just need a bit of fresh air and a change of scenery.

Love to you all, Axxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

And to us all:

Cos we deserve it!

 

[purplelou]

Have a lovely lunch! xx

 

[Dwrgi]

Hi girls, how are you all! Purely selfish post, I'm afraid, but thoughts welcome if there is anybody out there! Helllloooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

Clinic just rang and there are three strong embies: 10, 8 and 7 cell, with one lagging behind at 4. As I have said that I want to have three put back in, they'd rather do that today than wait until Saturday. If I was vehemently against twins, then they'd wait for Sat but I don't mind if I do have twins (I just want to have a baby, or two, and be a mummy). Am I doing the right thing?? Aaaargh, doubts are creeping in.

Can I have your thoughts please?

Of course, with this unpredictable game, we might end up with zed, zero, nada, nil, zilch.

Got to be out this door in half an hour! Yikes.

Big to everybody!

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

First off, WOOOO HOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! It's SO awesome to actually have choices!!!!!!

Now, I'm going to play devil's advocate a little....

In utero, an embryo doesn't actually reach the uterus and begin implantation until 6-8 days after fertilization, which means that by going to blast and transferring the embryos into the uterus on day 5, blast transfer actually more closely mimics the natural process. But as it's a newer procedure, not all labs are skilled at culturing to blast. Not all labs are created equal, just as not all drs are created equal. If the lab you're using hasn't gotten the 5-day culture down pat, then you're better off doing a day-3 transfer.

The other thing about blast transfer is that, whether in the natural process or in the lab, every single embryo that results in pregnancy must progress through the blastocyst stage anyway... the reason fewer embryos survive to day 5 in the lab has a lot to do with the fact that even in the youngest, healthiest couple, roughly 50% of human embryos have the wrong number of chromosomes and will never make it to blast stage and would never result in pregnancy, no matter whether they grew in vivo or in vitro. The thinking is that only the strongest, healthiest, heartiest embryos survive to day 5 in vitro, so they have a much better chance of resulting in pregnancy than a good-looking day-3 embryo.

All that said...

You have to do what is right for YOU, and I think your clinic's advice is spot-on.

My reasons for doing a blast transfer are that it has a significantly higher pregnancy rate than a day-3 transfer with a lower rate of multiples. Since you are ok with the possibility of twins, go ahead and put all three back today. DH and I would like to avoid multiples if we can (obviously if we get twins we'd make it work, we just know everything would be easier with one! ), so for us, even at day 3 we would only put back two. This is why the decision of how many to transfer literally made me break out in hives.

Hey HA-I know you meant well when you wrote this, but I don't suppose it was what I wanted to hear after I'd had my 3 DT! Was a bit upset by it, tbh, and wanted to be a bit more positive as the decision was done and I was happy with the decision. This is hard enough as it is, as you'll know! But just needed to get that off my chest, no hard feelings!

 

[LilSluz]

Hey Dwrgi - I'm glad you are not as uncomfy as you were the last 3 days! I am soooooo hoping TSC are getting all snuggly in there! Btw,I have to ask - what is IYKWIM? I'm thinking its an acronym, but given those funny Welsh words - ??? (I'm poking a little fun, but I love your Welsh words, so bring it on, sister!)

OK, so I have to take the time post this bc i keep hearing about you talking to TSC & it keeps reminding me of something so I have to take the time to share this. Its really interesting & thought-provoking, but you may know about it already &/or don't believe. Anyway, its these "water experiments" that were done by Dr. Masaro Emoto that hypothesize the effects of thoughts/emotions on water & the results of those wide-ranging thoughts/emotions. And of course, our body is made up of 70%+ of water, so it has major implications for us (& the earth 70%+ water) "if true". And you hear about people talking nicely to plants & swear by it, etc. I will mention that many in the scientific community naturally have doubts & attempt to debunk, but then they also run into problems even in triple-blind studies, so ???

We can all make up our own minds about its validity & our own beliefs, but at the very least, I thought that perhaps this would be thought-provoking & inspirational to us all on our TTC journeys... Here's the more entertaining version from a movie I recently saw on Netflix (its a beautiful little clip): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2_dmYT83ZKY

(I just realized the whole clip shows on the post but I don't know how to just post the link - sorry)

Wikipedia version just so you have both sides: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Masaru_Emoto

I hope everyone is having a wonderful hump day! Will post more later on

 

[missyt]

Hi Ladies! I've been on a little break for a while but I just wanted to say that I missed all of you.

Lilsluz, that is a very interesting post about Masaru Emoto. I do think the body and mind are a very interesting and misterious. Thanks for sharing.

Anyway, I just wanted to say that we all, in our own ways, take what approach we think is right for ourselves and our journy to find fertility. No one's approach is right or wrong but what we feel deep down is best for us. Unfortunately, the one thing we all have in common is/was infertility. It is so important that we encourage each other and support each other and respect each other's choices. A negative comment here or there, in our very fragile emotional states send us in a tailspin. Sometimes for several days. This can happen anywhere; at home, work, friends, family and even this site. I know some of you may not agree with my natural approach but its what I feel is right for me and I stand by that. We are all very complex individuals and there are reasons we make our choices. The beauty of being an individual is that we can make a choice. I don't mean to go off on a tangent but all I want to say is that this is a support site and I support each and every one of your choices as long as you know that it is right in your heart.

 

[LilSluz]

I've posted in your journal already, but just wanted to say WELCOME BACK MISSYT!!!!!!! So glad you found a great source of inspiration on your break

I agree - we all have our own methods & beliefs & I, for one, actually love that about this group. We all get this "well-rounded" approach/view of TTC. It is great to share our methods with others & to hear others' methods so we can all make up our own minds according to what we truly feel in our hearts is going to work for us. Some people can't imagine, or aren't ready for, taking meds &/or doing ART. Others can't imagine drinking spinach shakes & doing acupuncture. Some people take a more spiritual approach, while others take a more scientific approach, & some take a little of both.

I believe that there is no right or wrong, too - only interesting information that we can each take back with us, or choose to ignore, according to our beliefs. We are all on a journey & we are all in different places (literally & figuratively) & each journey is as important & precious as the next. And I really do appreciate every suggestion, comment & tidbit of info. I get on this site.

My one wish for all of us would be that wherever our journeys do take us, may they end in peace, happiness, success & love (& may they end sometime soon in a BFP, please?).

Big Loves to all of us on our journeys

 

[purplelou]

aww Missy - welcome back, I have missed you. I already posted in your journal too but I am glad you are back. I hope everything is ok and your little family (including little Bandit) are all well?

gosh I really hope I didnt say anything to upset you, I do sometimes go around life with feet in mouth, if so, I am terribly sorry....and that goes for anyone I may have offended .

Big xxx

 

[HappyAuntie]

Hey HA-I know you meant well when you wrote this, but I don't suppose it was what I wanted to hear after I'd had my 3 DT! Was a bit upset by it, tbh, and wanted to be a bit more positive as the decision was done and I was happy with the decision. This is hard enough as it is, as you'll know! But just needed to get that off my chest, no hard feelings!

I am so very sorry I upset you. I think when I wrote that I didn't realize you'd already had the transfer. I absolutely think you made the right decision for you in doing the 3DT, and I hope you'll forgive my insensitivity.

 

[twinkle1975]

I think we need a https://www.runemasterstudios.com/graemlins/images/grouphug.gif

It's not surprising with so many of us here and so many hormones - natural & synthetic raging through us - that we occasionally tread on each other's toes.

What I like about here is that it's always unintentional (unlike in some other places I visit) and I think we've always got each other's best interests at heart.

So, keep being the lovely ladies you are & know that we're here for each other

 

[Dwrgi]

Hey Dwrgi - I'm glad you are not as uncomfy as you were the last 3 days! I am soooooo hoping TSC are getting all snuggly in there! Btw,I have to ask - what is IYKWIM? I'm thinking its an acronym, but given those funny Welsh words - ??? (I'm poking a little fun, but I love your Welsh words, so bring it on, sister!)

OK, so I have to take the time post this bc i keep hearing about you talking to TSC & it keeps reminding me of something so I have to take the time to share this. Its really interesting & thought-provoking, but you may know about it already &/or don't believe. Anyway, its these "water experiments" that were done by Dr. Masaro Emoto that hypothesize the effects of thoughts/emotions on water & the results of those wide-ranging thoughts/emotions. And of course, our body is made up of 70%+ of water, so it has major implications for us (& the earth 70%+ water) "if true". And you hear about people talking nicely to plants & swear by it, etc. I will mention that many in the scientific community naturally have doubts & attempt to debunk, but then they also run into problems even in triple-blind studies, so ???

We can all make up our own minds about its validity & our own beliefs, but at the very least, I thought that perhaps this would be thought-provoking & inspirational to us all on our TTC journeys... Here's the more entertaining version from a movie I recently saw on Netflix (its a beautiful little clip): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2_dmYT83ZKY

(I just realized the whole clip shows on the post but I don't know how to just post the link - sorry)

Wikipedia version just so you have both sides: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Masaru_Emoto

I hope everyone is having a wonderful hump day! Will post more later on

Gosh, that is an amazing idea, and, although Emoto is heavily criticised, it just allows us something else to think about with regard to our subconscious in this whole business!

I know that I have read in several TTC books that it is essential to visualise our eggs being fertilized, then becoming embryos, and then developing to becoming morulas, etc. I also know that Zita West advocates stroking your tummy and imagining your baby in there, and making them feel welcome, but also establishing a connection. I do feel a bit bizarre talking to T,S & C but I want to do everything that I can to make them stick (I don't want to think that I couldn't talk to 'them' and so jeopardised any part of it). I know it sounds wacky but we have got to get our minds around this and to BELIEVE that it will happen. Yes, I know the science will say that we need 23 pairs of chromosomes, etc. but why not have a bit of spiritual faith too? That's what babydust is all about, and I like babydusting!!!!

The thing is, at this stage, it's all a bit of an anti-climax. Doing everything you can to grow good follicles (and lots of them)-check! Getting through egg collection and actually getting some eggs!!! Check!! Eggs fertilizing overnight (a dreadful time of anxiety). Check. Emryos developing and dividing in the lab. Check. Getting enough embryos to actually have a choice at day 3 of what to do. Check. Embryo transfer. Check. Now, it's as if it never happened. I have twinges and strange sensations, but I'm also taking oestrogen pills and progesterone pessaries (butt plugs). Are the twinges down to T, S & C or the additional hormones? Who knows. By talking to them I feel as if they are still there, and reminds me of what we went through to get to this stage. It's accepting the idea, which is so bizarre.

Anyway, I have rambled far and wide, but I really believe that we have science and then we have Mother Nature. We need to get Mother Nature on side, and to do that we have to believe! That's how I see it!

Thanks Lil-thoughtful of you to post the link.

Thanks for posting this

 

[Dwrgi]

Hey HA-I know you meant well when you wrote this, but I don't suppose it was what I wanted to hear after I'd had my 3 DT! Was a bit upset by it, tbh, and wanted to be a bit more positive as the decision was done and I was happy with the decision. This is hard enough as it is, as you'll know! But just needed to get that off my chest, no hard feelings!

I am so very sorry I upset you. I think when I wrote that I didn't realize you'd already had the transfer. I absolutely think you made the right decision for you in doing the 3DT, and I hope you'll forgive my insensitivity.

No worries, Happy, honestly, it's fine! Hope you're okay?

 

[Nikki Leigh]

ITA with Twinkle...lest we forget...this stuff is emotionally DRAINING and can really throw you off your game.

Purple...yes, I did have my scan last week (NT) and it was negative, which is a good thing, thank God! But we announced to close friends and family at my "surprise" birthday party the Saturday before my scan. It was totally impromptu, since I didn't know I was having a party and didn't know who was invited. So I sort of stumbled the words out, LOL. My mom said she'd suspected all along, after she saw the size of my boobs (I won't go into what she actually said). Everyone was shocked (especially my MIL for some inexplicable reason, as she thought we'd given up (I was all, but I'm guessing she figured we were still having right, and this is usually a possibility)) and very happy for us. I told my dad yesterday (as he lives on the other side of the country, and I forgot to call last week).


ETA: I'm not ashamed to admit that I read a book called "Supernatural Childbirth" in November or early December and she also had us visualizing the same process about everything being God-centered and healthy--our ovaries, our uterus, etc. I felt sort of silly, but I did it anyway.

 

[Dwrgi]

Nikki-brilliant result on the scan, and so glad that you've announced it to the world! I bet your family and friends are over the moon for you!! Glad to see you on here!

Lil-IYKWIM, Happy introduced me to this, it means: If You Know What I Mean! I had to work it out for myself, but saves A LOT of typing! xxxx