TTC 1st child 35+ (Please spoiler any PG news/announcements).

[HitTheJackpot]

Purps - thanks so much for the and support. Dang I love this thread!!! And you're right... it isn't fair. Downright sucks, actually But I just have to try to keep those jealous and negative thoughts out of my head or I'll go bonkers

DrS - Oi vey! How did they determine that they were "bad sperm"? One thing that DP wants to look at is seeing if there is a different donor that we could try... maybe one that is cheaper Problem is that I REALLY like our current donor's profile ... and we know there have been confirmed pregnacies with him. Well, it is an option we are going to to check out. It can't hurt to look, right? And I have to admit... DP *is* pretty "fab" She has been so amazing through this!

Lils - You always know the right (and true) thing to say! Thank you... and I hadn't thought about it the way you put it re: only having one "real" attempt because of the poor timing the first two months. That helps me feel better~ Something another chica said on a diff thread is that "Remeber, perfection takes time and I have no doubt that the baby you conceive will be perfection for you both” ... I also found comfort in that! I'll certainly read that article between jobs tonight!! Thanks again!

Froliky - Do you know how much you are appreciated?? Thanks so much for the thought of the silver lining... sometimes I get too focused on the gray clouds and miss the sparkly silver lining that is RIGHT THERE! Thank you!!!

On a positive note... DP just called me. She happened to notice that there are *5* Fridays in June... and Since I get paid EVERY Friday... that is a whole paycheck that we didn't budget for! Now, while the timing won't be exactly right with when we will need to order the "frozen pop" it still means that if we juggle things just right... maybe, just maybe, we CAN have a try in June! I mean, I don't want to get my hopes up, but I'm still -ing!

A little hope is a good thing... tears have stopped... lets hope it lasts!

 

[dashka]

Hi ladies!

Dr S- GL Thursday!! you flirt you !! Love the Bing cherries too!

Lils - yah I think I may be able to get a copy (hopefully) of file... My MD lets me copy at $1 /per page when I ask for a copy of my own results - I think that is crazy! When you've had a lot of tests done -that really adds up... I don't care if they charge me I just want access to them... (and it's not like I can say off the bat when I meet them - ummm...will I be able to transfer my file ?
Yeah the 'adoption card'..... seems everyone thinks it's the easier way out... It really is an AMAZING thing -but totally only if you are ready for it... I wouldn't change anything there... Part of my 'home study' that they did with us -the social worker (adoption practitioner) had to make sure we were over 'our grieving' for a biological child.... and at that point I kinda was (or convinced myself I was) because I truly believed that it would happen naturally one day too somehow... I didn't want the pain of failure and uncertainty and it brought hope to our lives -in that we were making something happen. I think in the past year it's really started to get to me again (turning 40 and time running out and once you really 'try' again - there is more disappointment to be had.
So excited for you and your trip! HAVE A GREAT TIME!!

Ella E. - I just noticed that you are from Toronto - Me too!! oh guess I'm going to have to be more careful what I say!!:hugs: Love your avatar too

Mighty - welcome to the best thread on BnB!!

Carole - so nice to hear from you!!! Tell those people to get LOST!! you need your rest girl!! Why don't people get that .... they can visit later on!!
hope you are doing well and Zara too!

HTJ - You have an amazing DP... Great that your doc is not pushing you into more expensive treatments right away... Hang in there

Frol - nice to hear from you too! that is sooo nice what your doc's office did for you!

Asry - how are you??

Purple & Dwrgi & Butterfly & LadyH - how are you guys? too much Jubilee fun going on???

Hello to everyone I missed!

AFM - got the appointment with the RE and it's July 23rd - I'll be on vacation that week so hopefully my mom can watch AD when I go... We'll see how it goes... Hopefully DH can come with me (they recommend it) but it's sooo hard for him to get time off (that will be his first day back - he is taking 1 week and I'm off 2 weeks). I'm already starting to get nervous. It will be here before we know it.

big hugs all around!!

 

[drsquid]

hit- doc wasnt doing sperm counts cause "it is from a sperm bank and it is always good" finally got a sperm count the 4th time and it was a count of 6.6 million (normal is greater than 10), motility of 33% (normal is 50) and progression of 1-2 (normal is 2+). the sperm i got this time is 28 million, motility of 50 and progression of 3. mind you it doenst matter cause im doing icsi. im torn though, first guy i really liked. this one i feel like im kind of settling .but then my mind says.. maybe there is a reason that the first rounds didnt work (cause it is highly unusual for bank sperm to be bad). im not a big fate etc person but... who knows.

 

[dashka]

HTJ - yay for extra June paycheck! isn't that awesome.... I had that happen in May...(as my pay is Thursdays) FX you get to do one in June!

 

[Honeybee73]

deleted post

 

[Mirium]

Hi everyone,

Mighty99 - I know how you feel. I have been trying for 2 years with 2 miscarriages and surgery to include fibroids included!

Chicken Chaser - that was an interesting story. Although your friend lost her husband, I was happy that she had a baby.

Dashka - It's great that you can get someone new to give their perspective!! Regarding my immune results the doc didn't even mention anything. He knows I was coming from out of state and had scheduled trip already so it might be why he just went ahead and did not bother to analyse. Also, some docs seem to have a standard treatment plan that they recommend when you've had 2 or more miscarriages. That doc sees women from all over the world for miscarriages (no kidding) and so he throws whatever he can at the problem without being reckless.

Although sometimes though I feel like some of the docs go through their routine and dont have time to analyse enough. I am saying this because I have another story - when I went to NY, that same doc did a uterine swab to test for ureaplasma and mycoplasma and the results came back stating 'Media overgrown with fungus and/or bacteria. Isolation of organism is not possible'. He called me and asked if I had any signs of infection and I did not and that was the end of it. Of course, that had to be a result of the infection I had just days before flying to NY right after an emergency D&E. I kept wondering if this was a problem but could not think of what to do - duh - until I saw an article one day advising to try a course of antibiotics if you're struggling with infertility, to rule out infections. That was months later. I called the doc and he prescribed the antibiotics. I am still worried about that result. I am trying to get more than one round of antibiotics prescribed. I am also planning to buy diflucan one over the counter soon because I researched and read that - that kills fungus while the antibiotics kills bacteria. I have to treat myself lol.

Big hugs to you. Everything will be alright. I have not figured out how to use emoticons yet...


HTJ - I used follistim for 2 cycles and it is quite expensive too. I understand the juggling and budgeting of funds.

Purplelou & Froliky - thank you both.

LilSluz - Your new doc having to analyze your results sounds great!! That's good news that your immune results were negative - one less thing to worry about. If you find more info about the pharmacy in NY that mails intralipids - can you please let me know? Have you heard of a Dr. Atillah Toth in NY that does antibiotic therapy for IVF success and miscarriages, problems conceiving etc. I don't believe it applies to all cases but some women swear by him. I just wondered if you heard of him.

grkprn - thank you. I wish our docs were like froliky's and would let us do IUIs in unmedicated cycles. Have a good evening

drS - good evening

Good evening to everyone

 

[Mirium]

Hi Honeybee73

I am so sorry. I did not see your post. I think I was typing for so long that you posted while I was typing. I was feeling very down up until yesterday too. You never know until you try - you could be the lucky one. All of us - we just dont know until we try. It's normal to feel down sometimes too but try to do happy things as much as you can.
Have a good evening

 

[purplelou]

dear honey (bumble) - big big

I think every single one of us has had days/times where we have felt so low and sad and alone. never worry about not having anything chirpy to say!
there is no easy answer although I wish there were! try to do nice things for yourself and look after yourself
we are all hear to listen when you want us to be. this is not an easy journey but remember you are not alone.

 

[LilSluz]

Bumble - This is a very tough journey, honey. But, you never know when things are going to work out in your favor? Do you typically have reg or short cycles? Because that will help your situation (as long as not way too short). Once you chart some, you will see a pattern & can look ahead at your most fertile days (light greenish color) & try to plan around those days if possible? And also, say you just can't work that one out, then you can always have DH's frozen or otherwise kept alive & then do IUI's? You DO have lots of possibilities, its just that the key - for ALL of us - is to figure out what our limitations/hurdles/med issues are & then make the best plan we can to try to overcome them.

Your situation certainly isn't impossible, honey. Look at the lot of all of US ladies! We've all got various problems ourselves & some don't even have a DH & we are all just doing our best to get around those problems, really. Its a good thing that you realize that the road may be tough bc the sooner you realize that the sooner you will gain that resolve that we all have (most of the time) & start working on solutions. It ain't gonna be easy, but you DEFINITELY have options so don't even think to count yourself out yet!

 

[LilSluz]

Arrrrr! I just lost my entire frkn post! Here's the short version

Miriam - I haven't heard of that Dr but only recently diagnosed RMC & Immunes (last 2-3 mos). Half of the people from South FL are from NYC, so we have much the same treatments, etc & strong ties there, so I should be in good hands ("should"). Does he do anti-b for NK Cells or when there in unexplained infert/RMC issues in general? Interesting! Here is an even better link than I had - a little old but lots of great info about NK Cells & Intralipids (increase in price prob due to sending overseas) - see Sec IV after the list of Dr's for the Pharm's. https://www.carefertility.com/ivf/viewtopic.php?t=39200

I'm posting this one separately bc they like to hi-jack my posts w/links in them! They say they're gonna review it, but I just never see those posts again. Hopefully it'll come thru...

 

[LilSluz]

Dashka - nowadays they can hopefully transmit electronically! I just faxed over 2 Med Release forms to RE & felt really guilty/bad bc it says I want the files transmitted to IVF FL (& my RE does spec in IVF). So I put "for 2nd opinion RMC Issues" so hopefully he sees that part. He's been so nice to me... (but nice ain't gonna get me pregnant!). Hey, that's great your appt is during vacation - ahhhhh, the stars are aligning in your favor??? Take heed of that one!!! Hope you are feeling better today, honey

HTJ - Yay for extra paycheck!!! Yes, perfection does take time - just think of what a diamond or pearl has to got thru!

Purps - Hope you are handling this 3-day work week well! Is it Tues or Thurs?

Dwrgi - Big to you during this carzy-busy marking period!!!

Agent Butterfly - please come back to home base...classified mission accomplished!

Asry - how you doing honey?

DrS - GL today!!!

LadyH - any word about mum?

Fro - always glad to make you laugh honey. I guess I have an active imagination . I have a sep post coming to you there chickie

everyone else!

Well, I sent everyone on "the list" some reiki last night. The energy was SO strong I almost puked 3 diff times??? Maybe it was my own bad energy from past crapola violently leaving my body (those are good things, btw!). BUT, just so you guys know, I will be taking everyone on my list to Stonehenge too so you guys will be doing this with me & MAJOR healing energy there!!! There is a "vortex" of energy there so the ancients figured that out & "somehow" got those enormous boulders there. I still gotta read more about it, but very cool...

(Stats: 6/12 people pregnant so far!! Most LTTC/major issues too! My name keeps being checked off & scratched out, but I'm getting closer...maybe). If anyone else wants to be added, speak up! (I have to get permission first, although I do a general prayer for all BNB ladies). I don't leave for another 6 hours...

 

[LilSluz]

Frolicky: HAPPY 12 WEEKS!!!!



I can't believe how fast that went! I know you still have one more little hurdle, but I am sure you are gonna be just perfect in every way!!! And I'll be checking in during my trip (which would normally be kinda lame, but I'll be by myself during part of it, so...)

 

[LilSluz]

Sorry I am serial-posting! but I just found something on NK Cells by Dr. Beer & my worries about optimal levels of NK cells are validated. Of course, mine were 12% (right on the line). there's a little something for everyone in this article - RMC, Unexplained Infert., failed IVF/IUI, failure to implant, etc:

Chapter 1: CD 56+ Natural Killer Cells

Problem
1. Increase in number 2-12% normal. Above 12% see infertility and pregnancy losses.
2. Increase in cytotoxicity in NK assay. Cytotoxicity above 15% at 50:1 can damage the embryo.
3. These cells usually reside in the blood; however, in 2% of women they are so activated they live in the uterus. This is determined by an endometrial biopsy on day 26 of a normal cycle and by the TJ-6 test which finds women whose Natural Killer Cells have become the most activated.
4. They produce toxic Cytokines (TH-1 cytokines) including Tumor Necrosis Factor (TNF) Alpha.

Consequences
1. Prevent implantation.
2. Cause miscarriages by damaging the placental cells, causing decidual necrosis, damage the yolk sac.
3. Later in pregnancy they cause slowness of the heart rate of the baby, cause an irregular shaped gestational sac that is smaller than normal and amniotic fluid volume that is too small.
4. They induce subchorionic hemorrhages which can cause spotting, bleeding and can be seen easily on ultrasound.
5. In some women they can affect the DNA in the eggs so that fragmentation, slow cell division, arrested cell division and poor quality embryos are seen.

If anyone interested: https://www.ivf-infertility.com/phpBB3/viewtopic.php?f=1&t=4431

 

[froliky2011]

Lil - I am getting all overclempted. (Did you see that Saturday Night Live skit?) Seriously...Thank you so much. I am looking forward to being able to do that for the rest of the ladies on here!! That includes YOU!!!

 

[HitTheJackpot]

Just a quickie this morning... got to work late because of a *ahem* "doctor's appointment" (okok, so I slept in... needed a mental health day ) so I'm pressed for time, but wanted to wish you a WONDERFUL TRIP, Lovely Lils!! Stonehenge is amazing (though it's funny, it seems (from my experience) that to many Brits it is just a "pile of old rocks" ... but in the states we learn that it is a mystical, mysterious place!

Be sure to get yourself a "pastie" (pasty?) while you're there... the one I had in Bath was FABulous! And if you have time, you might want to check out the White Horses! (google will explain) I visited the Westbury White Horse which was pretty dang cool!

Sending love and Tinkerbell Baby Dust to each and every one of you... willl try to catch up between jobs tonight!~

*smooch*

 

[chickenchaser]

Lils I have probably missed you but if not have a fantastic time. I didn't know you were a believer and user in the power of stone henge and Reiki. That is fantastic. I often get a lot of reallllyyyy looks when i talk about healing and the powers of nature to change our lives if we ask them to.
It is nice to meet someone of the same mind. Positive healing to you and if there is time I would love you to add me to your list XXX

 

[dashka]

Hi ladies!

Honeybee - hope you are feeling better soon.... Things will work out and I know you will 'find' a way

Mirium - so frustrating all that you've been through with the infection and everything.... and you have to go to NY each time? Be sure to take probiotics with all the antibiotics -as they can play a little havoc on your system -(they kill the good and bad bacteria) Good luck hun

Froliky - HAPPY 12 WEEKS!!!!

Lils - thank you for the reiki thoughts and for ALWAYS thinking of us... you are WONDERFUL... I have been meaning to tell you that one of my favourite girl names is Lily.. (I love Lily, Lilia, Lilianna.... all of them and hope that if I ever have a girl she is going to have one of those either as first or middle name if I have anything to say about it)... I think it's amazing that your code-name is Lils - and we got along so great! For our AD we decided to keep her birth-given name as it was part of her identity.... Thank you for the NK cell info and glad you are getting your file transferred electronically .... amazing! Have a SUPER-FANTASTIC trip girl!!

Big hello and hugs to everyone!!

AFM - feeling great today... I walked over to ND at lunch (she is a 10 min walk from work) and picked up some Royal Jelly... She told me a while ago that there are a lot of success stories with it (for egg quality, #follicles etc) and many of her clients going for IVF take it and have noticed a big difference in # and size of follicles.... So I figure since I'm waiting for my RE app't and for tests -I might as well add something else on to my regime and maybe I'll get a natural BFP in the meantime!...wouldn't that be great.... Anyway -it can't hurt... and then if I start meds in a few months/fall I'll stop it. The brand that she recommends that is really good is in capsule form (concentrated powder in capsule) and it's 500mg "GLORY BEE" -is from Oregon (US) Here is the website:

https://www.glorybee.com/shop/Vegetarian-Royal-Jelly-Capsules-500-mg-15780.html

You shouldn't take if you are allergic to bees/honey products. It takes a few months to improve quality of eggs. ND told me to take 2 X 500mg /day (separately). I've read many success stories online with it too...especially for older women.

I just noticed she charged me $25 +tax and the website sells for $10.95 for same thing - wow what a mark up .... I don't know maybe there is too much shipping up to Canada or something.... It's ridiculous.
Lils - you know the Wondfo preg.tests you mentioned - I can't order from amazon.com (won't allow me -as some products don't ship here cause they offer the same thing on the Canadian site amazon.ca for MUCH MUCH More... I think CDN was 40 Opks and only 10 preg tests for $27/28 and all I need are the preg tests.... GO FIGURE - sometimes it sucks living here for that reason... It's weird cause I order stuff from the US site all the time -but there are certain things that they won't ship.

Well better go now I'm blabbering !!! love and hugs to all!! xoxo

 

[Lady H]

Lil yes I am coming to Bath! Look forward to seeing you have a great flight xxx

 

[Butterfly67]

Hope that covers everyone

Sorry only getting on when it is time for bed

Sending lots of love to everyone. Congrats Froliky and I will see lilS, dwrgi and lady H on Sunday

 

[Asryellah]

OOooh you lucky girls get to MEET !!! Cant wait to hear how it goes!!! I would've loved to join you Lils, LadyH, Butterfly & Dwirgi!!

You guys ARE going to have a fabulous time

I hope LilS you have a safe trip and find Stonehenge to be all you have dreamed it to be

I wish all of you ladies here have a wonderful weekend and sunshine in your life

ps. Dashka, I used Royal Jelly also!! Capsules and got some honey that had it and used it in my tea. I prob used it for 4-5 months. I also found it helping (or just the honey) me with my allergies that hit me in spring when tree leaves etc. start blooming.