TTC 1st child 35+ (Please spoiler any PG news/announcements).

[froliky2011]

Kismet - So sorry! Take care of yourself!!

Pad -

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Amazing surprise!! Congrats!! What a miracle!!

LadyH

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- Great news!!

I just wanted to pop in quick. Sitting at the computer kills my back (sitting period is just really not fun). In any case today I found out that the girl that said "everything happens for a reason and the reason she would never do IVF, AI etc. is because she would be afraid something bad would happen"....well she got pregnant on her first try and she just got married in November and got pregnant on their honeymoon. She called me today to say she was thinking about me and wondering how I was doing but I really felt like her intention was not in the best spot because she once again had to stress "I really believe everything happens for a reason and I don't like to try and control it.....blah blah blah"...I seriously am really hurt. Who says that to someone who is 40+ weeks preggo and had to use AI etc. She is really not the most sensitive person if you ask me. At this point, I think I am ready to just write her off as a friend. She has no idea and is so damn ignorant as far as I am concerned. I suppose she would say that to a gay couple or something too. So, I guess, if you work too hard at something, or try to make your dreams come true..in her opinion...everything should be "EASY"! Well, glad it came easy for her..not everyone is that fortunate and just because we are not that fortunate does not mean that we should not do anything possible to make our dreams come true. Whatever! I had to vent! I am so tired of ignorant women who make remarks and they have no clue what the hell they are saying. Sorry for the rant. I just want to cry. Lots of Love to you all...Fro

 

[Samsfan]

Frolicky----- She is totally IGNORANT! AND Frankly I think she may envy your life in some other way. To call you and basically say those things. I would not only ignore her, but probably cut her out of my life. You have wonderful things happening and you should focus on those things rather than her!

Hugs

 

[iamtruetome]

IAMTRUE---- I am married 3 years, using OPK's for last 6 months. We have really been trying to conceive for a year... prior to OPK's I just charted... We never used any protection for 3 years we have been married. I recently went to FS in beginning of December. I had a sonogram, blood tests, femvue and more blood tests. My AMH is .53. We originally spoke about IUI. FS states success rate on IUI is 10 percent with drugs its 15 percent with IVF it is 40 to 45 percent. I am 38 years of age. We had a lengthy discussion about my profession, lifestyle concerns and he then suggested IVF. I am not a worse case scenario.. but he doesn't suggest waiting to try naturally. He says he doesn't know how much time I have. He really cannot tell. I guess that is why he suggested IVF. He felt strongly about IVF after our conversation.

I also have a friend who had IUI. I feel the same way. I cannot discuss it. I also have another friend, who is very supportive. She has 2 kids from a prior marriage.. She had them young. She was remarried at 38 and she has been through 7 years of IVF without success. She is now 50. She encouraged me to go to FS. She also feels that I should jump into IVF.

I have another blood test, gyn exam and sono scheduled for first week in January. I guess I have to decide by January 7th and we will take it from there. This process takes a while. I probably won't be able to start until Feb if that is the avenue I'm going to take. Don't know if that helps. I saw on another thread about acupuncture. I think in the meantime, I'm going to give that a try.

So much to digest, isn't it? I guess all we can do is take it one step at a time. Hopefully you will get good news in early January with your tests. It is good that you're being proactive.

Did you have an FSH test in addition to the AMH? I'm just wondering why my ob-gyn encouraged me to take the FSH right away, but I think when I mentioned the night sweats, that concerned her.

Has your husband also been checked and everything turned out okay on his end?

We are just now looking into our coverage if IVF is a route we have to take. It is so expensive, and we couldn't even consider it without the coverage from my insurance.

Until we get these tests done we won't know if one or both of us has an issue, but my age combined with my DH's DE is enough to encourage us to get a bit more aggressive.

I'll be thinking of you and hoping everything goes well.

 

[Samsfan]

Iamtruetome---- He did not do the FSH. I gather because it has to be done on a specific day of my cycle. I had missed it when I went. It almost seems as if my FS has made up his mind that I should proceed with IVF despite numbers. I think the reality is, when you are older than 35..what do the numbers matter.. Reality is.. we just need to get pregnant. I've tried and failed. The longer I . wait, the more difficult it will get. My tests are all "normal" He even stated that my AMH was normal for someone my age. He is less concerned with the AMH number because he actually did a sono that looks at my eggs. He says all looks good... but fact is by the time I have a child a may be 40. My husband also tested and he is fine. So it is time and age that is not my friend.

I will keep you posted.

IAMTRUE---- I am married 3 years, using OPK's for last 6 months. We have really been trying to conceive for a year... prior to OPK's I just charted... We never used any protection for 3 years we have been married. I recently went to FS in beginning of December. I had a sonogram, blood tests, femvue and more blood tests. My AMH is .53. We originally spoke about IUI. FS states success rate on IUI is 10 percent with drugs its 15 percent with IVF it is 40 to 45 percent. I am 38 years of age. We had a lengthy discussion about my profession, lifestyle concerns and he then suggested IVF. I am not a worse case scenario.. but he doesn't suggest waiting to try naturally. He says he doesn't know how much time I have. He really cannot tell. I guess that is why he suggested IVF. He felt strongly about IVF after our conversation.

I also have a friend who had IUI. I feel the same way. I cannot discuss it. I also have another friend, who is very supportive. She has 2 kids from a prior marriage.. She had them young. She was remarried at 38 and she has been through 7 years of IVF without success. She is now 50. She encouraged me to go to FS. She also feels that I should jump into IVF.

I have another blood test, gyn exam and sono scheduled for first week in January. I guess I have to decide by January 7th and we will take it from there. This process takes a while. I probably won't be able to start until Feb if that is the avenue I'm going to take. Don't know if that helps. I saw on another thread about acupuncture. I think in the meantime, I'm going to give that a try.

So much to digest, isn't it? I guess all we can do is take it one step at a time. Hopefully you will get good news in early January with your tests. It is good that you're being proactive.

Did you have an FSH test in addition to the AMH? I'm just wondering why my ob-gyn encouraged me to take the FSH right away, but I think when I mentioned the night sweats, that concerned her.

Has your husband also been checked and everything turned out okay on his end?

We are just now looking into our coverage if IVF is a route we have to take. It is so expensive, and we couldn't even consider it without the coverage from my insurance.

Until we get these tests done we won't know if one or both of us has an issue, but my age combined with my DH's DE is enough to encourage us to get a bit more aggressive.

I'll be thinking of you and hoping everything goes well.

 

[Mirium]

Iamtruetome

Spoiler

The tests I have been doing are to track my levels of HCG and progesterone too see if pregnancy is progressing

Froliky - I think what's most suspicious about your friend is that she feels the need to be so opinionated about something that's so important to you. At this point, there is very happy things to talk about for both of you so why the negativity from her. I don't trust her either! Take care of yourself and ignore her as best as you can!

 

[BabyBean14]

Delete

 

[Samsfan]

Thanks Kismet!

Don't know whether I trust him. He comes well recommended and has a good reputation, but I also sometimes think maybe the insurance money is talking???

Idk.... It seems that everyone that knows me and has gone through it suggests to just jump into IVF. They say why wait... Who knows with this stuff and that is my main concern. I rationalize that if IVF will give me a 40 percent chance as opposed to IUI, then maybe I should just go with IVF. However, I understand its tough on the body.

Samsfan: I turned 39 in November. My FS outlined his plan for us at our initial consultation, and IVF was number 4 of 5 things. He wants us to try naturally for a while longer and then progress to IUI. My age is a concern, of course, but he didn't feel we were beyond hope, even though he suspects I have PCOS and endo. It might be worth it to revisit the IUI possibility before committing to IVF. Whichever you decide to go with, I hope it works fast!

Mirium: Sending I'm pulling for you!

Fro: That is NOT cool of your friend! I, too, believe things happen for a reason, but I also believe that we have to work hard to get what we want. As the saying goes, God helps those who help themselves. If she wants to use fate as an excuse not to try, that's her problem.

Big enthusiastic waves to iamtruetome and all the other new thread members . (Sorry, I've forgotten your screen names already. I'm not trying to be intensive, I'm just sleep deprived. )

AFM: my uncle's funeral is tomorrow and unfortunately we are getting that storm that's been going up through the eastern USA. My father called twice today trying to order me not to go. We are monitoring the weather and will decide in the morning. On Friday we'll be heading to the in-laws for New Years. Thankfully we'll be on the train for that trip! I'm still mostly lurking on BnB for now, but I likely won't be on at all next week while I'm away. Obviously I don't want the in laws seeing my on here.

Early happy new year!

 

[pbl_ge]

Well look what we got for Christmas—a bunch of new people! Welcome to the best thread on BnB!!!

Bgs – Welcome! Do you chart? It can be helpful for two reasons. The first is to see if your cycle looks normal. From what you say it’s possible yours might be short, and there are things that you can do if that’s the case. The second is to keep track of when certain symptoms might show up for you. That way you can know what’s normal and what’s not. Sorry your TTC journey hasn’t been going smoothly. I hope 2013 is your year!

Samsfan, ! The last doctor I saw (I go to a team practice) encouraged me to start seeing a fertility specialist right away. I think to them they just know how the story ends, so often that they want to flip ahead to the more promising part. For me, I’ve decided that I’ll go to the FS when I start WANTING to go. Right now, I’m feeling like it may not be necessary, but it’s great to know that’s an option waiting for me when this normal route gets too frustrating, or I start feeling hopeless. Do you think you could convince your doctor to let you try a round or two of IUI first? I feel pretty strongly that this is YOUR body and YOUR TTC journey, so you should get to make the choices.

Iamtrue—Welcome, also! I haven’t done all that testing yet, but lots of ladies here are quite expert. I do know it can take several months for the body to settle into normal post-BC. Who knows how people would react, but your friends might enjoy getting to share their TTC journey with you. I’ve told very few people that we’re TTC, but one of them is a friend who used IVF to get her daughter several years ago. I was really glad I told her. She was very understanding, and it’s been great to have her around in some situations that would be painful/awkward for me, like around pregnant people.

Lady H:

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So glad your scan went well! Congratulations! What a relief after everything you’ve been through to be able to relax now. …At least until childbirth gets closer.

Mirium

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Glad the tests look good so far!!!! Let us know when you get your test results. [-o< Thinking lots of sticky dust for you!

Lils

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STICKYSTICKYSTICKYSTICKYSTICKYSTICKYSTICKY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Chicken, I’m sending you lots of !!!!! How are those symptoms looking? Test date is coming soon!

Nessaw, I definitely hear you about how sad the holidays are when you were supposed to be pregnant, dammit!!! I’ve thought about that a lot. I’m trying to stay optimistic, thinking perhaps this is my last Christmas with no baby or bump, but that may be foolish. We shall see. Sorry AF came. Glad you got to enjoy your Christmas cocktails!

Frolicky, any day now!!!! Sorry your friend is being a jerk. Some woman around here has an avatar that says, “When you say everything happens for a reason, don’t be surprised if I punch you in the face. It happened for a reason.” I LOVE that!!!

Kismet, some snow we got, huh! Hope you can make it to the funeral. How sad to have this happen over the holidays. I hope you have a great trip, and get lots of rest and restoration!

Maddy-- Hope you're doing okay.

and to everyone else – Purps, Pad, HA, Dr.H, Dash, Dwrgi, Moon, Small, Green, BF, and everyone else I’m forgetting. The holidays have muddled my brains.

AFM, we’re in the BD marathon! Getting ready to O any day now. It will be my first real TWW since August when I got my doomed BFP, so I’m pretty excited. We’ve had houseguests for the past few days (and they’re still here!), so it’s been stressful, but good to see folks. I think I need to go help them shovel snow now.

Happy holidays!!!!

 

[pbl_ge]

Oops. That message was all kinds of messed up. Had to fix it.

 

[Butterfly67]

I love what pebble says that we got newbies for Xmas

Welcome newbies

I guess going straight to ivf is a matter of choice. I think if you have been trying for a year or so, you are near 40 and you have the cash it makes sense. I still think you can get pg naturally at that age if all is ok but sometimes we are impatient and don't want to wait and the chances are higher with ivf. So I'd say if you have the cash/insurance then spend it

Fro. Yes, things happen for a reason. Someone invented ivf for a reason stupid dumb friend not long now

Dash hope you had a lovely Xmas with AD

Lils and Dwrgi my lovelies hope you are having lovely Xmas breaks

Pad, hope you took back all the stuff and got some

Lady H bet you were imagining next year with little

Pebble have fun with the marathon

Nessaw, maddy, kismet, purps, Mirium, chicken, drh, greenleaf, Moon, smallh, asry (has arrived?) and everyone

 

[Samsfan]

Pebble I totally agree with you. I guess my question is... does anyone know how long it usually takes to start IVF. Seems like this testing is taking forever... maybe it's for the best...

Butterfly--- very excited for your journey!!! No cash here.... but we all do what we have to do..


So glad to be here!!!!!!!

 

[LilSluz]

Yay, I&#8217;m FINALLY back home after delayed flights, snow, sleet & rain! Hope all you beautiful BNB ladies had a wonderful Christmas? Mine was awesome. I have a VERY busy few days ahead of me as I have work to catch up on & 3 more Xmases I have to do w/peeps here (its never-ending when we go out of town&#8230, so will make it a quickie -

Bgs - & welcome to our thread! I hope you stay is short & sweet. Btw, can we call you Bugs? It&#8217;s easier for us to remember when there&#8217;s some kind of name (pbl is Pebble, etc) &#8211; everyone pretty much gets nicknames on here .

True - & welcome! You should get not just FSH, but you should be tested for the remaining hormones, as well. Usually Dr&#8217;s will test FSH, AMH, TSH, LH, Estradiol and some other hormones/tests on Day 3 of your cycle to see where you are at hormonaly. You may also get a test at Day 21 (OR 1 wk post-ovulation if you have a non-28 day cycle &#8211; very important). GL & hope the tests show you some answers.

Sams &#8211; the reason they want you to go straight to IVF is because of your low AMH. Low AMH usually signifies Premature Ovarian Failure (POF) & signifies your quality or reserve of eggs is very low. So, Dr&#8217;s often see that & their thinking is if you are running out of time, & you really want a baby, then the best thing to do is go straight to IVF, as it does give you the highest chance of success. That being said, there are those of us that turned around our AMH &/or one that got pregnant with like a .32 AMH (IVF worked, she mc&#8217;d, then got pregs naturally & will have a rainbow soon), so please don&#8217;t take that as a death sentence or anything. Did you start that list of supp&#8217;s I gave you to try to increase your egg quality? You should really, really do that as it would only enhance IVF, as well. See that article under DHEA about IVF outcomes w/very low AMH I had given you. You may want to take 4 mos trying naturally while supp&#8217;s are kicking in, or - ? Whatever you decide, its ultimately up to you! If cost is not an issue, I&#8217;d be inclined to do it (if no natural BFP in 5-6 mos w/supps), but that&#8217;s just me thinking what I&#8217;d probs do if in your situation. I&#8217;d also get retested after 4-5 mos of taking supps. What about FSH & all the other hormones? (see post to True above)

Ness & Pebble &#8211; yeah, I had a 12/24 due date this year for one of mine, so I understand. Actually every Xmas for the last 3 yrs I was supposed to be pregnant over or have a LO over. Holidays & mc&#8217;s are the pits.

Mirium -

Fro &#8211; Grrr, I remember her! You know what? People who never have any health issues are so quick to say &#8220;be natural, let things be, don&#8217;t stress&#8221;. While there is some truth to not stressing & trying to go w/the flow of things, you also have to more-often-than-not go out there & get something if you want it. If you want a job, do you sit on the couch all day & just pray for one & expect it to knock on your front door? Or do you use the gifts God/universe gave you to be assertive & actually look for a job utilizing such skills? If I didn&#8217;t pound pavement for 3 yrs straight & take charge of my health, I would still be sitting here with a broken back, no hope for ever being pain-free or normal again & you could forget TTC altogether. Pebble posted a story that I can never seem to remember all of it, maybe she will post it for you &#8211; it will help so much with what you are struggling with bc I know exactly what you are saying. I think it may be time to let her go as a friend bc anyone who judges you without walking in your shoes, doesn&#8217;t; deserve you as a friend. Btw, still waiting on the text&#8230;


Kismet &#8211; good luck today, hun. And have a Happy New Year at ILs!!!
Chicken &#8211; GL hun & lots of

Pebble - Thank you! I always stay houseguests are like fish &#8211; they start stinking after 3 days! Hoping you&#8217;ll get a moment to breathe soon, but glad its not stopping the ! Hope you catch that eggy - sending tons of !!!

BF &#8211; how was your Xmas dear??? Big Xmas coming at you! Will get to your journal soon.

Dwrgi &#8211; hope you had a nice, relaxing Xmas this year & got to spend time w/OH & fur-baby huskies. Big Xmas for My Favorite Welshian! I&#8217;ll get to your journal soon.

Dashka &#8211; hope you had a wonderful Xmas w/DH & AD . Hopefully your break is giving you much-needed relaxation time, too, hun.

Purps &#8211; haven&#8217;t seen you on here as much? Hope you had a lovely 1st holiday w/Lana chic!

Pad - Hope you are having fun in Cologne! Without beer, that is! Still shocked over your news&#8230;

DrH - how was the big reveal???

AFM &#8211; I had a great time at home for Xmas. Lots of practical jokes going around & joke gifts but I&#8217;ll have to tell you what happened later as this is supposed to be a quickie. I love going home & I have an absolute blast, but when we fly home for Xmas, it is hectic & crazy morning, noon & night the whole entire time &#8211; no rest, no relaxation, so I'm just totally exhausted Then we get home & get to have 3 more Xmases (tonight, this weekend & next weekend) & I all I really want to do is .

And&#8230;

Spoiler

I got my u/s today & OMG, lil peanut is actually there & it has a lil heartbeat! Or like Dwrgi calls it, Lil Flo Rida (FR). I can&#8217;t believe it, I am still in shock & so is DH! Dr placed me at 6+1. I&#8217;ll try to attach a pic in spoiler (not a great one &#8211; we need to take a pic of the screen next time instead of taking pic of pic). I was sick, headachy & tired whole time over Xmas, but I didn&#8217;t mind as it reassured me that it was still there! But Dr did put me on nausea meds today. Next u/s 3 weeks! Cautiously optimistic of course, but this was a huge hurdle for me!

(I cant attach it in a spoiler since I need a URL & its just a jpeg. I will attach in PARL thread & provide a link a bit later if anyone is interested. I may need to do a journal, but Idk bc I just have very little time for BNB as it is...???)

Bug

 

[Lady H]

Lils

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I have been praying you would post soon, yay yay yay! Pleeeeeease be the rainbow Beanie Lils deserves

 

[Mirium]

Lils

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Yay!!! That is awesome!!!!

 

[drhouse]

Wow lils great news! So pleased to hear!

Reveal went really well ma and pa are stoked. They have cancelled my sea kayaking Christmas present though .

I'm joking about the literal meaning of the amh, there is no associate actual number. Good to hear though lils you know your numbers he he he , wouldn't think an accountant would ever miss a transcription error!

Welcome new ladies. Baby dust to all!

 

[LilSluz]

re: AMH.

Ah, Samsfan, DrH is another lady w/low AMH (totally forgot until you reminded us on Dwrgi's journal, aka The Kitchen) & look at her now.

Spoiler

So glad your family was very happy! Yes, I think kayaking adventures will have to be put on hold. But you are about to embark on a WAY better adventure, there my lady so enjoy!!!!

 

[Samsfan]

Lil--- Yes started on C02q and the Omega 3. Haven't started the other 2 yet... I'm working on it, but the Dr. also started me on Vitamin D. I'm not one used to taking vitamins so I'm working up to it. I think by the time I get this IVF started it will be 3 months. I have to get a gyno clearance, mammogram, see my endocrinologist have the water sono and then get clearance. It will be February the earliest. So maybe I'll have a lil miracle in between.

 

[pbl_ge]

for Lils!!!!!!!!!!

 

[FireBaby]

Hi guys sorry to jump in - I'm a constant stalker/lurker of this thread and I love reading about what you guys are all doing.

drhouse I noticed you are located in Australia - I just had my AMH tested in Australia and now I'm back in the US.

I haven't been seeing a FS yet (getting testing done on my own and hoping I won't end up needing a FS) but I got the AMH number - from Australia and they said it was 19.5 - with a range of 14.5-30, the GP who did the test said - it's in range - but I was the first person who'd ever ordered the test through her so she didn't really know what she was talking about.

I guess what I'm trying to figure out is 19.5 on the low end of okay? Where in the range does this sit?


Happy New Year everyone xoxoxoxoxo

 

[drhouse]

Yours is perfect fire baby! Don't worry be happy! Have lots of nooky and it will happen!