*** January Jellybeans 2015 *** - join & chat here :) 132 so far!

[Kiwiberry]

I hope everyone is faring better than me with this pregnancy. My husband left me today, said he wanted a divorce. So now I have to figure out how to balance a two year old that I can barely handle, the house bills- which are behind and apparently it's my fault- and a new baby that we haven't prepared for. I don't think I can do it. Th two year old keeps asking if mommy is okay and where's daddy.

Awww.... I feel so bad for you hun. I wish I had some advice, but sadly I have no idea what to say. I am keeping you in my thoughts and hoping things start to look up for you. Why would he do such a thing when you two have a baby on the way?

 

[sethsmummy]

oh my gosh hopeful i am so so sorry. What an arrogant pig! sending you so much love and hugs right now I hope you have a good support network around you right now xxx

 

[ab75]

Hopeful. I am sorry that this has happened. House bills are a joint responsibility and just because he has left doesn't mean he can walk away from them. He should still be paying towards behind bills and anything towards future bills to support his 2 children. I hope you have some close family and friends that can support you thru this and help with your children.
I don't know any background, but hope that once things settle down that you realise that you are a strong mummy and you can do this xx

 

[Izzie74]

Hopeful

 

[brunettebimbo]

Hopeful.

 

[brunettebimbo]

We are having an excited baby moment. We are talking about when he is born and Tristan being the first to see him etc and writing lists of the things we still need to get.

I'm stuck on the consumable side of things that we need, so far for baby I have -

*Cotton Wool
*Nappies
*Nappy Cream

We didn't use body washes etc on Tristan so won't this time either but I feel like there is so much more we need. Any ideas please?

 

[sethsmummy]

erm nail clippers? but i think thats the basics hun so if your not wanting to use washed etc then thats all you really need. xx

 

[mrsstrezy]

Hopeful! Just wanted to pop in and say how sorry I am. I can relate somewhat...I had a bomb dropped on me during this pregnancy in regards to my husband. We're working things out and not divorcing, but I know how it is to feel like your world is falling apart around you when pregnant...when it should be an enjoyable and happy time. I'm so sorry he's abandoning you like this. Hopefully with some time he'll have a change of heart or at least help you out a little bit? If you ever need to talk, feel free to PM me!!

 

[hopeful2012]

Thanks ladies! It's been rough, the worst part is the little girl who doesn't understand where daddy is. I've spent the day trying to come up with some kind of plan. I couldn't sleep last night but I'm hoping that with a few sorta plans and writing down my thoughts it will be better tonight. He hasn't even bothered to call and check on Marianne. I plan to request sole custody due to abandonment. I think I don't want him at the hospital with this baby- I'm being selfish but I don't want too deal with his crap while I'm in labor.
I went through and changed out pictures in the house today, washed sheets, etc. I've been having some painful contractions but I'm pretty sure it's Braxton hicks as they are still irregular.
Honestly at this point, I want to talk the details out but I'm not sure if I want him to come back. I don't want to constantly worry if he will do this again and confuse our babies even more. I think I'm more upset that he left the girls and left me to try and figure out everything at this late in the game. I know I'll be okay. Thanks for listening.

 

[hopeful2012]

I hope everyone is faring better than me with this pregnancy. My husband left me today, said he wanted a divorce. So now I have to figure out how to balance a two year old that I can barely handle, the house bills- which are behind and apparently it's my fault- and a new baby that we haven't prepared for. I don't think I can do it. Th two year old keeps asking if mommy is okay and where's daddy.

Awww.... I feel so bad for you hun. I wish I had some advice, but sadly I have no idea what to say. I am keeping you in my thoughts and hoping things start to look up for you. Why would he do such a thing when you two have a baby on the way?

I'm not sure. We haven't really been fighting so it's out of the blue. I appreciate the thoughts and hope your little girl is doing great! I'll be okay once I get a few things together and planned. Luckily I have a great neighbor, babysitter, and family that is supportive. My mom actually dealt with this too when she was pregnant with me, so she understands, but isn't pushing me to talk yet.

 

[ttc_lolly]

Hopeful I'm so sorry to hear that I don't mean to be rude, but honestly what a spineless coward of a man to leave you and your toddler whilst you're heavily pregnant. Do what you can to make yourself feel better right now. Marianne is still so young, lucky in a way, so although it's difficult for you to explain things to her, you won't need to go into detail and she's resilient and will forget this short time of upset and confusion fairly quickly if he's leaving you financially unstable then that's really not on, you don't need that added stress and pressure right now. Is there any way you can find out your rights legally to getting help from him to help with the bills etc, and of course child maintenance? Go easy on yourself xxx

 

[ttc_lolly]

I'm 32 weeks today! can't believe I have just 5 weeks until I'm full term. Feeling really overwhelmed! I have my 32w growth scan and consultant appt on Wednesday, so looking forward to seeing my little miss again. Will get get to speak to the consultant about my funny turns too, which I'm pretty sure are down to stress and anxiety and not pregnancy related at all so not sure how she'll be able to help me but I'll feel better speaking about it!

 

[brunettebimbo]

Happy 32 Weeks I can't believe how close we are all getting!

 

[sethsmummy]

more hugs hopeful Im glad you are thinking of some coping strategies.. and i dont blame you for not wanting him there when you have this baby that will jsut cause more stress for you. And tbh not being your partner anymore he has no right to see the intimate parts of you

happy 32 weeks lolly hope you get the answers you need hun. I have to admit i love growth scans getting to see bubba again. hope you can get an answer to your funny turns.


Im back at the diabetic clinic tomorrow thank goodness! I am hopefully going to be switched to insulin! I cant cope with the metformin side effects.. im literally having to be near a toilet as much as i can its horrendous. hopefully once i come off the metformin i will stop having dizzy spells and all the stomach problems. I had to grab dh to stop myself loosing my balance while in the shop before

 

[ab75]

Hugs hopeful xx

Happy 32 weeks lolly xx

Hope you feel better soon Tara xx

 

[x_WelshGirl_x]

So sorry this has happened hopeful. I wouldn't want him at the birth either. You have your girls to be strong for now


Soooo we're still in limbo land about this mortgage and house! Really is stressing us out. Due to the bank losing our original mortgage application, we are now on a lower interest rate and they have said we don't need to pay the fee. Last week our financial advisor said it was just literally a click of a button away to get the evaluation and mortgage offer sorted. But it's still not done. The solicitors are waiting on the local authority searches to come back and the mortgage offer from the bank. The estate agent selling the house has been on the phone to OH as questions are being asked why it's taking so long. We are so close yet so far away from this house.
My dad knew someone who bought a house in the area we are buying, it took 5 weeks and they were moved in! We put the offer in on 11th september. 2months ago! It is getting beyond a joke now. Sorry for the rant. Who knew buying a house would be so much hard work.

 

[Pix]

Thanks ladies! It's been rough, the worst part is the little girl who doesn't understand where daddy is. I've spent the day trying to come up with some kind of plan. I couldn't sleep last night but I'm hoping that with a few sorta plans and writing down my thoughts it will be better tonight. He hasn't even bothered to call and check on Marianne. I plan to request sole custody due to abandonment. I think I don't want him at the hospital with this baby- I'm being selfish but I don't want too deal with his crap while I'm in labor.
I went through and changed out pictures in the house today, washed sheets, etc. I've been having some painful contractions but I'm pretty sure it's Braxton hicks as they are still irregular.
Honestly at this point, I want to talk the details out but I'm not sure if I want him to come back. I don't want to constantly worry if he will do this again and confuse our babies even more. I think I'm more upset that he left the girls and left me to try and figure out everything at this late in the game. I know I'll be okay. Thanks for listening.

(((((( hugs ))))))

I'm so sorry. There's a million things running through my head to say and not a single one seems appropriate. But if you need anything just send me a message. We are in the same time zone so I can reply fairly quickly.

Hang in there and realize how amazing you are as a woman. That even though it's a set back you WILL realize your strengths.

 

[messica]

Thanks ladies! It's been rough, the worst part is the little girl who doesn't understand where daddy is. I've spent the day trying to come up with some kind of plan. I couldn't sleep last night but I'm hoping that with a few sorta plans and writing down my thoughts it will be better tonight. He hasn't even bothered to call and check on Marianne. I plan to request sole custody due to abandonment. I think I don't want him at the hospital with this baby- I'm being selfish but I don't want too deal with his crap while I'm in labor.
I went through and changed out pictures in the house today, washed sheets, etc. I've been having some painful contractions but I'm pretty sure it's Braxton hicks as they are still irregular.
Honestly at this point, I want to talk the details out but I'm not sure if I want him to come back. I don't want to constantly worry if he will do this again and confuse our babies even more. I think I'm more upset that he left the girls and left me to try and figure out everything at this late in the game. I know I'll be okay. Thanks for listening.

I feel just awful for you hopeful

I hope you're not trying to manage this sudden upheaval this alone. If you don't have friends and family that can help please don't hesitate to contact social services. They can help you get back on track financially. The last thing you need to be worrying about right now is how to pay the bills.

There's no way I'd let him in the delivery room but I would pursue the heck of child support and spousal support. Whether you ultimately end up divorcing or not he doesn't get to just walk away like this.

You sound like a very strong woman and don't blame you for questioning taking him back out of fear he'll do it again in the future. If he even tries to come back I'd demand intense counseling - make him stick to every single session and let him find a way to pay for it.


OOOhhhhhh just reading your posts makes my blood boil for you! What a grade A (butt)

 

[Dawnyybus]

Hello.

I hope everyone is okiee, I am sorry i haven't been on for so long and I won't even pretend to have read the past 200 pages, I am sorry for everything I have missed.

Just to let you all know the reason I haven't been on is because I am suffering serious perinatal-depression and an eating disorder, I have been on a psychiatric ward since I was 21 weeks, I will be 32 weeks on Wednesday and thus have not been able to post or keep up to date.
I am waiting for the decision on when they will do a planned c-section to deliver the baby (hopefully by the end of this month) although that then doesn't solve any problems as the diagnosis is that I will develop post-natal depression and not be able to bond with the baby...

I hope everyone is okiee.

I have missed you all loads, I will try to keep you updated as I can but I understand that my position can seem horrible to some people.

Xxxxxx

 

[brunettebimbo]

O Dawn big hugs. I don't understand any of what you've just said but hope you are ok