looking for ttc buddy?

[cla]

i keep going on the preg tests and it gets me down. really how hard can it be to get pregnant and keep it. sorry im having a downer today xxx

 

[blessedmomma]

yraunaj have they run any testing on you? you would think they would be checking estrogen and progesterone levels, among other things to see whats going on. its great to hear your thinking of adopting. you have a lot of love to give! i will be praying everything works out ok for you!

 

[naderz]

hey girls how u all doing?

katie i feel so bad, im so sorry u feel like this. but i know how u feel. wen i had my second mc a girl at work anounced she was preg and i hated it. i felt awful thoughts and emotions but i couldnt help it. i never liked her but this made it even worse. i found myself not being able to bare being in the same room as her of look at her wen she spoke to me. she took great pleasure in rubbing her preg in my face, she wud tell me her trousers didn fit and wen she was goin for her scan and constantly stood in front of me rubbing her belly. i used to go home every evening and cry. it was hard enuf having my mc without everyone around me talking about pregnancy and her being such a bitch. then wen i announced i was preg she never even said congrats to me she carried on as if i wasnt preg at all and she was the only one. then wen she went on matertity leave i was asked to give money to her collection and sign her card and i said 'absolutely not' and i found out today she had her baby yesterday and i came home dis evening and cried again. i hope god can forgive me for the awful thoughts ive had of her but i cnt help it.
wen u want something so bad and someone else gets it (especially wen its someone who doesnt deserve it, she was a horrible person b4 her preg too) u resent them so much and build up this huge hatred for them.
anyway i jst needed that rant. does this make me a bad person? katie i would hate to think we make u feel like this wen we talk about our preg. id hate to think i made u feel like she made me feel. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

sory for such a long post.

 

[cla]

You rant away, if god listened to me I would be 10 foot under. And I'm so glad you didn't give her anything hopefully she doesn't go back to work when her maternity leave finishes lol

 

[naderz]

hey claire, lol we all hav a bit of inner hatred. wen she comes bac to work ill be on my maternity so itl be about another year before i see her again
how u keeping hun? xx

 

[cla]

I'm fine, I had my possitive opk Tuesday which Iam really shocked that I ovd so early.
Did your ov date change the first cycle after your mc??

 

[RedRose19]

thanks sinead it really helps your comments, and no of course not your dont make me feel llike that, you ladies deserved your bfp and i know your all gonna be or already are good mothers and i love hearing about your updates i def do not hate ye i love ya ladies you make me feel better and help me keep going.. im not really giving up just not gonna concentrate on ttc because i know i prob stress too much over it.. because i find the more i relax the quicker time goes hehehe meaning hopefully it brings me sooner to my bfp...
im sorry you had that bitch in your face.. hopefully the gift of a child will change her personality and make her realise how it feels to be a mother.. im sure she feels bad now for how she acted in front of you..

there is so many ppl in real around me preg.. i just want to be a mother.. i want to love i want to take of them.. have that little person call me mommy so badly... i want me and oh to get excited about it... i want us to think of names.. buy clothes ready for the new baby and cry together when we finally have our baby

 

[naderz]

i didnt pin point a date of ov i jst went from wen the type of cm i had and i used a ov calculater on the internet on tell me my fertile days. but i know that u def ov early after a mc, ur very fertile after one. lots of people get preg straight away before their first af comes.

 

[cla]

Katie the feelings you are getting I'm getting those as well even though a
I have rian . Rians getting to an age that he needs us less and that kills my little boy doesn't need me much now xx

 

[RedRose19]

yeah i can understand that would be hard.. hope your ok we will get there ladies..

my mom appprently took over a year to concieve her first child she was stressing over it.. soon as she just went feck it im not ttc anymore.. first month she got preg... fingers crossed that happens to me

 

[naderz]

katie it will get u wen u leased expect it, people always say that once u relax it happens and wen it does u will make an amazing mammy

 

[RedRose19]

also it doesnt help next week its been a year since i lost my baby bear i cant believe its been a year...it was such a horrible time for me.. im gonna light a candle for it..

 

[Shey]

shay i hope your son is ok, i had mine removed when i was 16 and i have never been in so much pain it bloody killed. mine got infected so i was bad for a couple of weeks, but i have heard its better to have it done when you are younger.

Thanks Claire
he's doing good. We are home from the hospital. they released him at 11:30 this morning and he's been playing a lil bit, so if he feels better tomorrow then sunday I can take him up to my sister's place in Orlando and take him trick or treating.

How are you feeling?

 

[blessedmomma]

shey glad your lil one is getting better.

sinead everyone struggles with feelings like that. just try not to be consumed with it. she might have been trying to hurt you, which is crap for someone to do. i have found though that if you forgive her she cant hurt you anymore. i know it doesnt make much sense, but your forgiveness will be more for you and how she effects you. as long as you allow her to manipulate you, she will. but if you really think of what kind of person she is, does she really have the right to make you feel hate? i know your a very sweet person and you dont deserve someone treating you like that.

claire and katie my heart just goes out to you two! i got married at 17 and shortly after started ttc. i tried for a long time and couldnt get pg. it was heartbreaking. a couple years later i had given up and was focused on college. had lost like 65 pounds and bought a kitten, lol, who became my baby. one day i realized i hadnt had af in a while. took a test and was pg. i was so excited, but mc after a week of finding out. sad thing was since i wasnt really ttc i had been drinking and smoking, so blamed myself for mc. they told me to wait 3 mos to ttc again, so i did. i got pg and mc again. my ex-husband didnt want to ttc again, but we got pg again 3 months later. i didnt bond with my dd til i was 5 mos pg. kept thinking i was gonna lose her. i know everyone says not to stress and it will happen, but its so hard to deal with in the moment. i do know you will both be holding you precious lil babies sooner than you think and this will all be a memory. i love you ladies and cant think of more deserving women of some beautiful babies

 

[cla]

i didnt pin point a date of ov i jst went from wen the type of cm i had and i used a ov calculater on the internet on tell me my fertile days. but i know that u def ov early after a mc, ur very fertile after one. lots of people get preg straight away before their first af comes.

is that true

 

[cla]

shay i would love to see some pics of him trick and treating. you do things 100% better then over here, over here you are lucky it 5 people open the door
melissa youve been through the wars your self, so im sending you loads of hugs xxx
katie i hope you are feeling better, it will get easier xxx
sinead how are you doing hun xx
and hayley where are you hiding xxx

 

[RedRose19]

thsnks so much melissa, all you ladies are so supportive and i cant thank you more for that.. you ladies keep me encouraged and help me feel better.. im feeling much better today even tho ive lost my phone and got soaked in the rain on my way to a job interview but hey the job interview went well, i got my tarot cards read by my mom and well basically she said to concentrate on college work and saving for the wedding and i willl be happy so maybe i should just do that ,

melissa im sorry to hear about your mc's.. i know its prob a hard thing to talk about i appreciate your advice and encouragement

 

[cla]

im glad you are feeling better katie you will get there xx
whats the job interview for ?? i thought you already had a job

 

[RedRose19]

i do.. but its childminding and they kinda did the bad by one not even needing me this week fair enough, but the other woman i work for didnt tell me till the day before she didnt need me this week! so im left now this week with no money.. so i just think its not stable enough so i really need a proper job if you know what i mean..

anyway how are you today? xx

 

[cla]

bloody hell thats bad, so what sort of job are you looking for ??
im alright, ive had my urine sample back and it was neg so im going to the doctors again monday and he will send me for blood tests. and thats about it my side, i just cant believe how quick this year as gone