**** October Bumpkins 2010 ****

[EmandBub]

what have i missed? x

 

[laura6914]

Awww you're working Saturday? That sucks hun. I feel for you! If it makes you feel any better, its supposed to rain here Saturday? ... so I wont be doing much outside that day anyway, unless it doesn't rain! Hopefully the rest of the weekend will be nice for you, when you're NOT working!

And you're going on maternity leave in 7 weeks already? Wow, lucky girl! Im working until Im 36 weeks.

YEAH 7 WEEKS TO GO :HAPPYDANCE: cant wait. Im taking it early as im moving 300 odd miles away and im not coming back to work so taking it early so we can move get a house and get settled before the baby arrives. so exciting.




Preegy Eggy congratulations on your pink bump hunny. Bet your over the moon. the pink bumps are flying in thick and fast now arent they. My scan seems to be taking forever to come round now.

 

[MommyKC]

Laura... aww how exciting! I wish I didnt have to come back to my job and could stay home with my babies... but unfortunately, financially... I have to come back.
Only 19 weeks until my mat leave!

EM!!!! How did it go?????

 

[EmandBub]

i'm not really sure good i think xx

 

[MommyKC]

Hmmm... were they surprised? Pleasant??

 

[laura6914]

OHHHHH Em did you speak to the FOB parents. Im jumping in half way through a convo i think so tell me to stick it if im being nosey!

i will be finding a new job when my MAT leave runs out and just do part time (16 hours a week) but no more than that. I have worked long enough i think. the baby will be 6 months old then so the 2 days im workign the MIL will look after him/her.

 

[EmandBub]

umm they were really good about it and FOB was there and he let me in and just sort of looked shocked.. and looked like he was about to burst into tears. his sister came to the door and she looked shocked and we just sort of talked it out with his parents. he just sat there the whole time and didn't say a word. his parents said they'll support me any way they can, though his brother was a little more shocked than everyone else. bless him.
it was just so weird.. i honestly was expecting an argument and accusations. but when they left the room Luke said that he was sorry and that he didnt mean what he'd said about her not being his. he said he was just so shocked and then he didn't know how to apologise. But he said he still loves me and that he wants us to get back together.
and i showed them the scans. this day has been so surreal. xx

 

[laura6914]

wow Em, i can imagine that being very sureal.
Im glad they took it well hun. Are you and the FOB going to give it a go?

 

[MommyKC]

Wow Em... that is crazy! I am shocked!
And speechless... THAT never happens!

Well it sounds like the visit did go over well... actually, better than good! And Im glad your ex(boyfriend?) apologized! Do YOU feel better now? Are you going to give him another chance? Is he still with that new girlfriend?

 

[EmandBub]

tbh i feel worse. i think i would've preferred an argument. atleast i'd know how to handle it xx

 

[MommyKC]

Aww hun Im sorry.
I guess this whole thing has given you some things to think about.
But at least they were accepting about the whole thing, and understanding. An argument probably would have been very stressful, which you don't need. xx

 

[EmandBub]

i just don't know what i'm meant to do now x

 

[MommyKC]

Well give yourself time... think about what YOU want and what's best for your little girl.
If you do decide to give it another go with FOB, then make sure he's not going to get scared and take off again - have a good, LONG chat with him... in private. Make sure he KNOWS how much of a jerk he's been and he won't get away with it ever again. Make sure you two are on the same page before moving forward with any sort of relationship.

Or, maybe you will decide you can't forgive him? ... sometimes we are put through too much to be able to just forgive and forget. And if that's the case, thats okay too. Tell him he can be part of the baby's life, but you just cannot be with him in that way... you've been hurt too badly after what he did.

Either way, think on it... don't rush into anything. Make sure you are 100% with your decision, or else you may end up regetting it.

Either way, it will all work out hun... you'll see.

***EDIT - love your new bump pic by the way!

 

[EmandBub]

he texted me asking if he can see me tomorrow so tomorrow morning we're going to go out for breakfast and just talk. i do still love him and i think i always will, but there's another person to consider now. and i have to do what's best for baby and i guess atm i just don't know what that is.
you always make me feel better you know that?
and thankyoou, my top covers it quite a lot tbh! here's my bumparoo today (ignore the marks on my tummy, my leggings are too tight):

 

[MommyKC]

Well especially with him being your baby's father... Im sure you will always love him, one way or another. But I'm glad you're going to get together with him to talk about things. Make sure you stand your ground and again, think things through! Sometimes, I found anyway, you get drawn to all the good times you've had together and the fact that you do love him... but be sure to be honest with him about his behaviour. If he really is sorry, he will truly own up to his mistakes and explain why he did what he did. Make sure that if you do get back with him, that you will be able to forgive him... if you're still angry and bitter all the time, you will fight... and the relationship will be a bad influence on your baby.
But you are being very mature about everything hun. And I know in the end, you'll do what's right for YOU and babygirl.
And Im glad I can make you feel a little better. I havent been in YOUR specific situation but I can imagine how you feel right now.

And VERY cute bump!!! Mine is the same... it looks huge without clothes on it! Well, it looks huge with clothes too... ... but I love having the nice noticeable bump!

 

[EmandBub]

I don't live with my daddy and I know he still loves me, but I guess I prefer my parents not being together. It means less arguing and they're still very good friends. (which is odd, I know) but I always wondered what it would be like to have a normal mum and dad type family. I guess I just want her to have that you know? What i didn't have. I do love him and I think I can forgive him, i just don't want to be worrying about him freaking out over anything!
i feel like a whale! but i love being pregnant. it's weird how much smaller it looks with my top on.. xxx

 

[MommyKC]

Well I know exactly what you mean. I grew up in the opposite situation. I grew up with my mom and dad, but they hated eachother for as long as I can remember. I know "hate" is a strong word, but that's the best word to describe them. My dad was an alcoholic and my mom was so angry and bitter with him constantly because of it (can't say I blame her - I love my dad, but if mh DH did some of the things he did, I would kick him to the curb!)... lets just say my dad used to pick my brother and I up from school, while drunk.
Anyways, they fought ALL the time. Constant yelling and screaming, well into the night. Even as a kid, I used to pray they would just split up. I used to cry myself to sleep. But they stayed together. I really don't know why - they say it was for us kids but they were so unhappy for sooo long, I don't know why they did.
Now, just 3 years ago (after 31 years of marriage) they finally called it quits. My dad has a new girlfriend and my mom is on her own. They are both much happier now, living seperately.
Sorry to be so depressing. I guess the moral of the story is just make sure if you guys get back together, that you're not going to fight and fight and fight. Now don't get me wrong, ALL couples fight. My DH and I get along swimmingly... but we still fight and yell once in a while. It happens. You can't agree ALL the time. Just make sure the good times are outweighing the bad. Don't stay with him just so your baby can have a "mom and dad" environment because sometimes that's not always the best for everyone.
Anyway, now that you've heard my life story... ...

And you're not a whale - silly girl! You look great! And isn't it amazing??? I love it too! Im so sad this is my last!

 

[EmandBub]

Well I know exactly what you mean. I grew up in the opposite situation. I grew up with my mom and dad, but they hated eachother for as long as I can remember. I know "hate" is a strong word, but that's the best word to describe them. My dad was an alcoholic and my mom was so angry and bitter with him constantly because of it (can't say I blame her - I love my dad, but if mh DH did some of the things he did, I would kick him to the curb!)... lets just say my dad used to pick my brother and I up from school, while drunk.
Anyways, they fought ALL the time. Constant yelling and screaming, well into the night. Even as a kid, I used to pray they would just split up. I used to cry myself to sleep. But they stayed together. I really don't know why - they say it was for us kids but they were so unhappy for sooo long, I don't know why they did.
Now, just 3 years ago (after 31 years of marriage) they finally called it quits. My dad has a new girlfriend and my mom is on her own. They are both much happier now, living seperately.
Sorry to be so depressing. I guess the moral of the story is just make sure if you guys get back together, that you're not going to fight and fight and fight. Now don't get me wrong, ALL couples fight. My DH and I get along swimmingly... but we still fight and yell once in a while. It happens. You can't agree ALL the time. Just make sure the good times are outweighing the bad. Don't stay with him just so your baby can have a "mom and dad" environment because sometimes that's not always the best for everyone.
Anyway, now that you've heard my life story... ...

And you're not a whale - silly girl! You look great! And isn't it amazing??? I love it too! Im so sad this is my last!

aww hon i'm sorry they spent all that time together, and about your dad. i'm thankful for my family tbh. some people think i'm weird for being Ok with them not being together. But i got a beautiful little sister out of it and they both seem happy. i'm a firm believer of not staying together for the sake of the child. but i do want to make it work. i guess i never really thought i'd be in this situation. especially not this soon!!
i feel huge!!! and by bump isn't round and perfect.
i don't think i'll be doing this again for a while
xxx

 

[MommyKC]

Well you're right - sometimes it is best to be apart and be happy, then be together and miserable. But good for you for wanting to make it work. Not only for bubs, for you too! If you can make it work, then that would be awesome!

And I feel huge too. I know what you mean! hahah Your bump looks nice and round to me? ... just wait though... it will get much bigger and rounder.
It's funny, I remember when I was 20ish weeks with Kyree, I thought I was huge... but boy, I hadn't seen ANYTHING yet! .... wait until you're 40 weeks... THEN you will feel huge! When you have to get help getting out of the bath! Or it takes everything you've got just to put socks on!

 

[EmandBub]

Well you're right - sometimes it is best to be apart and be happy, then be together and miserable. But good for you for wanting to make it work. Not only for bubs, for you too! If you can make it work, then that would be awesome!

And I feel huge too. I know what you mean! hahah Your bump looks nice and round to me? ... just wait though... it will get much bigger and rounder.
It's funny, I remember when I was 20ish weeks with Kyree, I thought I was huge... but boy, I hadn't seen ANYTHING yet! .... wait until you're 40 weeks... THEN you will feel huge! When you have to get help getting out of the bath! Or it takes everything you've got just to put socks on!

that's so true! i just want her to be happy and healthy and to know that she has two parents that love and adore her. i would love for this to work out. but i'm just not sure if anything can really be this perfect?
omgg noo not bigger! according to one of those labour predictors i'll only get to 37 weeks. it better be right. otherwise i'll end up falling every time i try and put some shoes on! xxx