Sticking Together Until We All Get BFP's!!!!

[MolGold]

Mary, I am glad your brother is stable now and what you're doing for him is also grt.. hope that BFP comes soon for your DH and you!

Amy, I am thrilled you guys are making headway. The mature sensible way you handled the rear-ending episode is great.. I hope good things happen to you, and soon!

Wishing - kayaking ! Wow! enjoy

Jess, my cycle used to be 31 days before starting ttc. Since jan its been 44 days, 34 days and this one looks like 33 days.

Take another few days off, you deserve it. Go to work when you feel ready

 

[AmySan]

Mary, that sounds so fun having a baby to take care of! so jealous! I'm glad your brother at least isn't getting worse!

Jess, I would take as much time off as possible, lol!!

Kenna, that sounds like a super fun day!

I broke down and tested today..still no signs of sf, and having mild cramping now..but still nothing severe. BFN

I texted mike to let him know. I wrote that he probably was happy and that he probably didn't want to go to the dr with me. He responded that he feels set up when I say things like that, like I want him to say 'no it is just the opposite' ..which I do..but could have worded it differently and then asked how he felt about it and if he still wants to go to the doctor.

I feel so broke hearted, this cycle has been such a tease. No crazy symptoms, but some I guess..and then being already 4 days longer than usual. Ugh. We didn't hit key days enough, I know that..especially with my surgery thing and yeah..just not good.

So sad I took anxiety meds before even testing because I figured it would be negative. So just sitting here with achy boobs that I want to rip off for teasing me. AF should be here soon now. Will use my last test if not by Monday, but at 13dpo (probably) it's a long shot a clear blue figure wouldn't pick it up yet.

I feel so lonely and my back still hurts and am really blah

Love you girls, don't know what i would do without you all.

 

[Wishing1010]

Jess, I agree that you should take more time off. You have to do some difficult work at your school and need to be 100%.

Kayaking was great! Had a blast. Even went back to the beach for dinner and shell searching later this evening

Amy, I'm sure things will get better soon! I'm sorry about the BFN but I hope it's just being shy. FX for you!!!

 

[Jrepp]

OUCH!! One of my scabs just ripped off when I lifted my pajama shirt to go to the bathroom. So naturally I rip the other side off too. Hurt sooooooooo bad!

 

[aidensmommy1]

Amy, how did his appt with ur psychiatrist?If u already told us, just let me know and I'll search for it. I didn't think I saw anything from u about it but maybe missed it. Ive been crazy busy with two 6yr olds and a baby. I'm not going to know what to do with myself when its only aiden again lol. So u haven't seen mike yet? stay strong hun. Things will get better. It really stinks being in limbo...especially about a relationship with the person you love but I think the stronger you are in this situation, the better everything will be. Ive been praying for u and I will continue to. Mike may just need a little time to process all that has happened before hes ready to talk to you himself..? Idk. There's so many different possibilities but I do believe you two will work it out if u are both willing to see the psychiatrist for the help/ outside perspective. Ugh. I just pray it gets better for u soon. Some things take a little time which stinks but hopefully it won't be much longer! Your in my prayers always

As for my brother, I spoke to him on the phone tonight and he was basically talking normal!!! and his results came in, its not contagious, its what they thought so hes been on the right meds and its clear to see because he is recovering on the fast side as of now. We are praying he just keeps getting better from here. I think he will be back to normal in no time. FX for that! He has too many babies/kids who need him. Thank god his speech is coming back! I feel so much better after talking to him and his gf a few mins ago about the results. Thank u all again for all the support! U have no idea how much I appreciate it

I wrote this about 1 1/2hrs ago and couldn't even finish it until now lol. I have the baby still tonight and then he goes back with his mom tomorrow . Lol. I dont want him to leave!! Ill be happy w monthly sleepovers though good night ladies. Ill be out of this baby fantasy that ive been living for the past 2 days by tomo night so ill be on here and able to keep up again. Ttys and I hope u ladies are having a good night!

 

[aidensmommy1]

Oh and jess I also agree about takin more time off. I think u could use it still! Ur still in pain and I know how that is. Relax as long as u can so u heal perfectly

 

[confuzion]

So glad to hear your brother is recovering Mary . You've been in my thoughts. I'm relieved for your family.

 

[aidensmommy1]

I actually got to temp today and the baby is STILL sleeping and didn't even wake up besides at 1130 last night. I'm shocked! Lol. I could've used sleep with all the sleep I lost the past couple nights any how.

Anyways just wanted to say hi to everyone before I get super busy . Ill be back on tonight to catch up on anything I miss today

TO ALL!!

 

[terripeachy]

aidensmommy-I left you a message on your visitor page. Your PM mailbox is full,so I had to post it on your front page. Sorry to barge into this conversation.

 

[aidensmommy1]

aidensmommy-I left you a message on your visitor page. Your PM mailbox is full,so I had to post it on your front page. Sorry to barge into this conversation.

thank you for letting me know about that opportunity, I just read it. I finally got my inbox to delete from my phone so I can receive PM's again. And yes id love that website. You should be able to private message me on here now. If it wont send let me know an ill figure out which email I have set on my phone that actually works lol (I need a new email account, stupid spam! Lol) Thank you again for thinking of me I wish u tons of baby dust!

 

[Wishing1010]

Best news ever regarding your brother, Mary!!!! so glad he is on the road to recovery!!!! And hopefully, you will have a LO of your own soon enough.

Yikes, Jess!!!! Did you put some neosporin on your wounds?

 

[Megamegan]

I am having a low day today and I want to get this out. I argue with my husband pretty much every single day. I can't handle it. How do you NOT argue with your husbands? The only way we don't argue is if we don't talk to each other. I don't know if it's me or if it's the relationship. But every time it escalates, it makes me glad we don't have a baby yet. I do not want to be someone who has a failed marriage. Yet I cannot seem to make this work. We've lived together for 2 years and it has always been like this. The worst part is, if it does fail at some point, there are no guarantees I could ever make a relationship work. So it's like, what's the point of starting over? Feels like I will never find someone who doesn't piss me off every day. I wonder if anyone has felt like this and gone on to find someone who makes them truly happy. I know I'm not easy to please, so I'm trying to make this work, not wanting to lose what I have built. But it sucks. It makes me think I really should not be trying to have a baby right now. And then I think, I'm almost 27 and time is running out. If I don't have a baby soon, I will miss my chance. Which, I'm sure, is what all the divorced parents out there had thought at some point- better have my kids now whether the marriage works or not. Bad idea in the long run but I can see what they were thinking.

 

[Wishing1010]

We argue once every couple of weeks, but we avoid it most of the time by knowing what sets off a fight in the first place. Like, if there is a sore subject, try to bite your tongue as much as possible. Maybe try spending some time apart? Even if just for the day, ya know? Could just be a lot stress causing this. I don't really have any advice

 

[confuzion]

That's a toughie megan. I feel like it would be wrong to advise you to get out of the marriage being that your problem is arguing and nothing major like abuse or infidelity.

That said, I was in 2 really bad relationships before meeting my husband. Constant fighting. Constant drama. Constant stress. I worried that it might be me. That I wasn't level-headed enough and I was doomed to eternal fighting and hurt no matter who I was with.

Until I met Michael. We rarely fight. And when we do, it rarely lasts longer than a half an hour. We laugh through 90% of the time we spend together. Before him, I never knew I could be so happy. And without him, I don't think I would have coped so well with all I've struggled through with my pregnancy losses.

So, yes, I'm someone who felt the way you did, and went on to find someone who makes me happy. But I wasn't married, so I know it's much harder when you've invested so much in someone.

You two married for a reason, and I hope you can work it out. But you will find happiness even if you don't .

 

[Megamegan]

Thank you Wishing and confuzion. Confuzion your post made me tear up because I know deep down, that is true. That it is possible to be happier. I am mostly so upset because I HAVE invested so much in him and I've known for a very long time that we don't understand each other and we are so different that fighting is inevitable. We do love each other, which I think is why we've held on this long. I really want to find happiness with HIM because that's where I'm at now. Moving on would really uproot my life and I don't think my fragility can handle it (in fact, I've tried several times to leave him before we got married, and I come back every time because I'm too weak). I'm constantly suffering from anxiety and depression and although I have a lot of supportive coworkers and a therapist who know my struggles, I'm really not armed with enough strength to get through a breakup and especially not a divorce. I also think I tend to turn towards breaking up instead of staying together, but that doesn't necessarily mean I SHOULD do that, it just means it's the only thing my eyes can see. I sometimes think I'm driving him away because he will say "get out of my life" or "just disappear" or something similar, but in reality he's just being dramatic and he doesn't mean a word he says. You can see how that's pretty upsetting. I know most people don't talk to each other like that. We are so mean to each other. As for spending time apart, I just got home from a week out of town, so part of this is probably us getting used to each other again. I am just in a low place today, I'm sure I'll feel better later. I think I cause a lot of this myself, but then I think he's just making me think I'm the one causing it. Relationships are SO HARD!!! Ugh. It hurts my brain to try to figure it out. I'm sorry to be airing this out here, but I feel like I have no one else to talk to, especially since I'm married and I don't want people knowing my business.

 

[confuzion]

That does sound stressful. Saying things like that is not ok. Have you thought about marriage counseling? Maybe it'll help him see things from your perspective and vice versa.

 

[froggyfrog]

Mega, dh and I really just bicker more than argue. It doesn't happen often, but one thing that helps us is to agree to disagree. We get mad and then when we cool down one of us goes to the other and we briefly share what we were feeling. In reality no two people share the same feelings, opinions ect. Especially dh and I. While we share a lot of common interests, we are two completely different people. Our differences balance us out and he is my best friend. Now bigger issues require more sit down and talk, but for the everyday stuff agree to disagree is our secret to happiness. Ttc can also cause a lot of stress. So maybe you could open a line of communication about ttc stress

 

[aidensmommy1]

Megan, dh and i have maybe fought about 3 times in the 2yrs we have been together (besides quick 5 sec disagreements) but i believe this is partially because when we do get into the minor second long disagreement's, we resolve it or take a breather for a minute and everything's right back to normal but that's always over dumb little things every once in a while. But if we did start to argue everyday and we wanted a baby and truly loved each other, id ask him to go to counseling and see if that helps. I think that could possibly help you work on issues u may have with relationships and same with him, u know?

Also i do want to say, i have had ALL bad relationships before dh, like i always started fighting with my ex's (no matter who!! And one was actually like PERFECT! he even looked identical to brad Pitt but i still couldn't control it. He was the one who got away before i met dh lol) anyways, id start fighting with ex's within wks to months after i started seeing them and i felt the same as u, "is it me?", but i realize now that it wasn't just me at all. Like i said dh and i neverrr fight! And that's crazy for me! Its been over two yrs and friends/family still ask us "how do u two not fight when it around each other every single day and nobody else?" lol. But yea i wanted to say that i did have those same feelings in the past and i know if at the time i was with"the one who got away", if i was more mature (only 17 at the time) we would have done counseling and worked it out..i know that for sure. But I'm happy things worked like they did now i have the one right here with me.

I'm not saying this is the case for u, just answering that question that i did move on to have a much better relationship after manyy bad ones.

as i said before, i do think counseling would be a great place for u two to start. He/she will go e u ideas on how to improve ur marriage and give u little exercises to do with each other to help u work at it. Idk if that's something either of u are willing to do...

I feel horrible that all this is going on with all of us! Its like this thread has had a giant storm the past month or so! Megan i wish u the best of luck with everything. I wish i could have been more helpful but i was always the same way in relationships until i met dh but I'm sure other ladies will have some better ideas for u. I hope everything gets better hun, I really do. Just always remember everything happens for a reason and maybe this was something that needed to be resolved before ur baby prayers are answered, who knows. I do know that baby's can sense if ur unhappy or a tense environment so itd be good for both u and dh to put ur happiness together first and sort that out, u know? Ahh I cant even get the words out that I'm trying to say! This is a moment when I wish I could actually talk to u ladies!! Maybe I'm just tired. I'm sorry for rambling Megan. Are u urself up for counseling? Dont just stay for a baby tho...i have a child and i basically just had aiden w his das because i just wanted a baby! I am obv not with his dad and it can be a big pain in the ass an I ALWAYS wish I was able to wait and get the 100% same exact baby (aiden) but with DH. Its hard raising them at two homes sometimes :-\. Your only my age, u have enough time and believe me, I didn't want to be divorced by 24 but it had to happen. My son was even noticing how unhappy I was and that's when I said alright I'm done! I dont know exactly how ur feeling and I hope I said nothing wrong. I just want u to remember that u do still have lots of time for a baby ( I know itd be nice to have one now) but maybe in the future ull be happy things went the way they did.
ive been typing this for over an hr so I'm sorry If I missed stuff by the time I submit this lol.

All of u are very much in my prayers. I love u all

 

[Jrepp]

I am having a low day today and I want to get this out. I argue with my husband pretty much every single day. I can't handle it. How do you NOT argue with your husbands? The only way we don't argue is if we don't talk to each other. I don't know if it's me or if it's the relationship. But every time it escalates, it makes me glad we don't have a baby yet. I do not want to be someone who has a failed marriage. Yet I cannot seem to make this work. We've lived together for 2 years and it has always been like this. The worst part is, if it does fail at some point, there are no guarantees I could ever make a relationship work. So it's like, what's the point of starting over? Feels like I will never find someone who doesn't piss me off every day. I wonder if anyone has felt like this and gone on to find someone who makes them truly happy. I know I'm not easy to please, so I'm trying to make this work, not wanting to lose what I have built. But it sucks. It makes me think I really should not be trying to have a baby right now. And then I think, I'm almost 27 and time is running out. If I don't have a baby soon, I will miss my chance. Which, I'm sure, is what all the divorced parents out there had thought at some point- better have my kids now whether the marriage works or not. Bad idea in the long run but I can see what they were thinking.

I'm so sorry Megan. I don't have much experience in the relationship department, and while my hubby can be a real jerk wad sometimes, we settle it pretty quickly. The best advice I could give would be to sit down and talk about what is bugging each of you about the other person and what is going on in your lives. Perhaps a marriage counselor would work, but I would try just on your own first and see if you can figure it out. Did you guys fight constantly before you started trying or has this happened since? It could be that you both are stressed about ttc and going month upon month of nothing really happening. I wish you all the happiness in the world!

Best news ever regarding your brother, Mary!!!! so glad he is on the road to recovery!!!! And hopefully, you will have a LO of your own soon enough.

Yikes, Jess!!!! Did you put some neosporin on your wounds?

I did put neosporin and some band aids. I'm having a really bad reaction to the glue in the gauze tape even though I got one that said hypoallergenic for sensivitve skin. I still have marks from the tape they used to cover up the iv too. This is all too crazy. I am about to email the teacher and tell her I am going to take a few more days. I'll be eating into my sick time at this point, but better safe than sorry.

 

[aidensmommy1]

Oh I see ppl did answer while I was typing. Confusion, u worded that great lol
I was trying to say basically the same thing to Megan about meeting my dh after bad/failed relationships and ended up writing a book in the process haha.