hello girlies...sorry i've been absent several days
i haven't read through the posts yet. i'll try to get to that this morning, but i just wanted to check-in quickly and let you all know i'm still here. dh and i ended up having a huge row before he left town.
it was awful.
it's taken us all weekend to get back to any sense of normalcy. dh always throws out that he doesn't want to have a baby when we argue like that too. he doesn't mean it, but he knows how much it hurts me to say that, so i told him we'd stop trying then. i don't know yet what this all really means. we may go back to ntnp
i can't take the ups and downs of this much longer and dh freaks out whenever we argue or if he gets stressed out. i still haven't ovulated yet. i think it's just been the stress of the argument, but sometimes i have a longer cycle too, so it could just be that. my opk was positive on saturday, so i thought i would have ovulated yesterday (and dh and i did bd yesterday too), but my temps didn't go up this morning.
so i don't know. maybe i'll ovulate today then. i guess i'll just have to wait til tomorrow to see. if we go back to ntnp, i'll still check in here girls...just maybe not as often. i'm so hurt by dh right now, and i don't want to keep going through this with him. i know what he wants. i know that if we don't have a baby, he will regret it. he was like this about getting married tho too. he's one of those men that have to be pushed to do even what he wants b/c he gets all caught up in the "what ifs" and anxious about the unknowns. he even says about himself that he's slow to get fully into something but once he's there, he's totally committed. it's true. i guess we're still in that "slow to get started" phase.
i thought we were out of it after the wedding, but i guess not.
i don't know. i don't know what will happen over the next couple of weeks. i'm just so discouraged right now. our house in SC sold. we can start looking for a bigger house now. dh started talking about it, and i just don't want to if it means not being able to plan for a nursery
anyway, i'll stop whining now.
i have to work a few hours this afternoon, then of course all day tomorrow. i missed you girls over the weekend
i have to go read back now...